bakerstreet | (no subject)

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Answering Machine meme

☎ Post a comment with your character. This comment functions as their answering machine or voice mail. Include an IC message if you want.

☎ Other characters will reply to these comments to leave your character messages.

☎ Be creative, have characters leave messages when they're drunk/high/bored/being chased by a rabid T-rex, whatever.

☎ Your character can then call these people back and demand an explanation!

Threaded | Flat

Hello! Leave a message after the

[wait for it]

beeeeeeeeeep!

[Generic mechanical voice of his service provider's default message. Lazy bastard.]

You've reached 555-555-1234. At the tone, please leave your name, number and a message. When finished, hang up or press the pound key for more options. To flag a message as 'high importance' please press '1'. To arrange for a call-back, please press '2'.

[Beep.]

Yo, you've reached Junpei! Leave me one!

[Raidou sounds resigned.] You've reached the Narumi Detective Agency, home of the illustrious master detective, Narumi Shouhei. Unfortunately, Narumi-san is out of the office at present.

Please leave your name, number, and a short description of your request after the tone. Your call will be returned shortly.

[ Natasha's (personal) voicemail doesn't actually have a message. Instead, there's about twenty seconds of various street noise, like the phone's been switched on and been forgotten about. Of course, is that for anyone smart enough to notice, the chatter always changes. The language of it, the pitch of it — it's Natasha's way of leaving breadcrumbs for anyone who's willing to check in to her personal line and wondering exactly where she is on the globe.

This month, apparently, it's Yemen. ]

[Naturally, Sherlock has a disagreeable and deeply unhelpful voicemail message.]

Just text me.

[Beep.]

[War doesn't have one. He always answers a call.]

This is Joan Watson. I'm not available right now, but I'm never far from my cell, so leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks.

[Beeeeeeeep.]

Hey, it's Marceline. Leave a message.

Make it quick.

[Silver doesn't live anywhere long enough to get an answering machine. It's always voice mail.]

It's Pyro. You know what to do.

[Beeeeep.]

Leave a message, don't be boring.

[Beeeeeep.]

Hey. You've reached Det. Jason Walsh. Leave a message, I'll get back to you.

This...this is Mei Tachibana. Please, leave me a message.

[Beep!]

I'm not here. You know the drill.

You have reached the personal voice mail of the Music Meister!

If this is Batman, go away.

If this is not Batman, leave a message after the tones.

[Rather than a beep, the tone is a harmonic minor scale.]

Hey, it's Billy. I'm busy. Leave me a message if you want me to call you back.

[Alice comes with two voicemails. The first is on her business phone.]

You've reached Alice Gimle of Charybdis Corporation. If this is a business-related call, please contact my receptionist at 555-555-1234. If this is a personal call, please leave your name and a brief message, and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

[The second is on her Deceptiphone.]

This is Pretender. I'm busy, leave a message and I'll respond when I can.

Edited 2012-11-20 19:38 (UTC)

You've reached Justin Hammer. Unfortunately, I'm unavailable at the moment, but if you leave your name and a brief message, I'll contact you as soon as I can.

hello!~ you've reached -- bzzt. [phone drop, running footsteps, shouting, exterminate! exterminate!]

beep.

[There's a very polite, even-tempered voice on the answering machine message, speaking the Queen's English.]

Hello. You've reached Mr. Fell's Books, in Soho, England. We specialize in rare and out of print Bibles, books of prophecy, and, er, children's books. Our current hours are Mondays from 8 AM to 10 AM, and Thursdays from 2 to 3 in the afternoon.

If this is a personal message... well, I can't imagine who'd be calling, but I don't often check this blasted thing, so you'd be best off coming in yourself to speak to me.

Have a lovely and wonderful day, then.

You have reached the energetic express channel of Farming Cyborg, Cyborg Grandpa-G! Call my G-Chan or Grandpa! If this is a matter pertaining to agriculture, press one now! If this is a social call, go away, I have no time for idle time wasters! If this is a matter of justice press two now!

If it is an absolute emergency that requires help this very second, such as an alien invasion, a giant monster attacking or evil robots stealing our women's innocence, press 5-5-5-6-8-6 NOW NOW NOW!

Hi! [she chirps.] This is Willow Rosenberg, witch extraordinaire. If you are calling in the event of mortal peril, please press 1 and go bug Giles. He'll know where to find me.

If this is for the exchange of salacious gossip, press 2 and leave your number and I'll get back to you. Thanks!

[Needless to say, no one except those in the know get this number, unless there's been some mistake...]

[-completely automated and spoken by a robotic sounding female:]

The person you are calling is unavailable at the moment, please leave a message after the tone.

Hello, this is Abraham Sapien. I'm either out in the field or not available at the moment, so please leave a message and I'll return your call when I can. If necessary you may also send a text or picture text to this number, but please wait at least ten minutes between photograph and transmission to observe your phone for paranormal activity. Thank you!

[beep]

Threaded | Flat

Page 1 of 3

Elmer C. Albatross | Baccano!

Albert Wesker | Resident Evil

Junpei Iori | P3P

Raidou Kuzunoha XIV | Devil Summoner

natasha romanoff (black widow) ⌛ marvel cinema

63!sherlock holmes | bbc sherlock au

War | Darksiders

Joan Watson | Elementary

no subject

Colonel Silver | Dragonball

John "Pyro" Allerdyce | X2 | OTA

no subject

Jason Walsh | The Unusuals | OTA

Mei Tachibana | Sukitte Ii na yo

Tony Stark // MCU