bakerstreet | (no subject)

Unless it's like roaches and meal worms, I can handle it.

[ It's not the food he's worried about. He lived in a cave for three months. And when does he ever really eat anyway? It's the k-word that's alarming. Kids. He doesn't know how to interact with them. Not a single damn clue. ]

Give me dates and I'll have JARVIS block out my calendar.

Try Googling cholar dal, it's delicious.

[ As for dates ... ]

Let's not plan too far ahead using specifics. I'm looking forward to seeing you soon, for what it's worth. The last engineer I spoke to worked at a seven-eleven.

[ It takes JARVIS all of two seconds to bring up the recipe. ]

Looks good. I like lentils. Who doesn't?

[ That's actually true. He does like them. ]

Yeah, sure. Spontaneity it is. The poor guy was probably starved for intelligent conversation. I hope you gave him some.

[ Lentil party time, it's imminent on the horizon. Cooking a meal for Tony can't make up for him zooming all the way out to Mexico in the suit and taking Bruce back in a plane, but it's a start. ]

Mm. I don't really talk to these people that much. Not if I can help it.

[ Sucks to get attached. He's allowing himself Tony as a concession because it's more than a little freeing to have someone around who isn't prone to tiptoeing around his irritability. ]

How's your flight going? Hit any birds yet?

[ Tony can relate. He doesn't really talk to the people he comes into contact with on a daily basis if he can help it either. ]

No birds yet. Dodged a seven-forty-seven a few miles back, but that's because JARVIS got distracted.

[ He's joking. JARVIS never gets distracted, unlike him, and there was no plane. ]

I left California about a minute ago. I should be at your location in fifteen, maybe twenty minutes.

[ Trusting that he'd have heard a plane that big thundering by, he nods agreeably to the ETA. Reminds himself to speak. It's going to be more than nice to see Tony again, to have back the camaraderie and ease he feels around another human being. ]

It's good of you to come out here. You're only flying, what, a thousand or so miles?

[ That's a lot of trouble to go to, his tone insists. So really, thanks. ]

Edited 2012-11-21 15:09 (UTC)

What else was I doing? Really, it's fine. I like to fly. Any excuse to get myself out of the house.

[ That is such a lie. Tony's a homebody. He would happily spend forever in his workshop, tinkering with his toys. But it's Bruce, and where Bruce is concerned, Tony's self-centeredness tends to take a backseat. ]

I probably should have asked earlier, but I can still make a detour. Should I be bringing some spare clothes?

[ Since Bruce is in the middle of a desert after a Hulk out. ]

[ He believes it readily, although there's no reason to doubt when Tony's reputation precedes himself and Bruce isn't exactly high-priority unless he's big and green. ]

If that would be okay, I'd appreciate it. Could I get changed on your plane, when it arrives?

[ As much as too-big boots, shredded pants and a sleeveless shirt are in vogue, he's not going to pass up the chance for a decent wardrobe change. ]

The couple who gave me their phone did the best they could with a strange naked man coming to on their property, to be fair.

Yep, no problem.

[ Quietly, though still audible since he's got the line open, Tony can be heard saying "JARVIS, get me the nearest--Yeah, that's--No, come on, we can do a little better than--Excellent." ]

Add another ten minutes or so onto my ETA. Pit stop shouldn't take long. [ A beat, and he adds; ] Think I ought to send them a fruit basket or something? A 'thanks for giving my buddy some pants' kind of thing? I could do that.

Uh, to be honest? They looked relieved to see the back of me. [ But! Not to dwell on that too much; ] I should be the one getting you a fruit basket. 'Thanks for dropping everything to mooch around the desert with your weirdo friend.'

That's because the view's nice.

[ He can't help it. He's reached the limit of his ability to behave himself. ]

We can skip the fruit basket and you can buy me a margarita. How's that? Uh, after we get you reunited with your wallet.

[ Rolling his eyes and forcing down an amused smile. ]

The screams really add to that theory. And that's fine, I guess I should contact SHIELD and ask for another credit card.

[ They obviously gave it him to keep tabs on Bruce, but when they apparently tailed him for a whole year anyway and kept Ross's dogs off his tail, he has no problem opting for the lesser evil's approach. ]

You mentioned you were working on the suit. Anything I can help with?

[ Tony does have a problem with the lesser evil. He doesn't like SHIELD. He doesn't trust Fury and he never will. And he definitely doesn't believe that they'll ever put Bruce's best interests above their own. ]

I got a better idea. Why don't I get you a card? It'll be unconnected to SHIELD and it will stay that way.

[ Because no one can hack a system like Tony. ]

That depends. How's your handle on nanotubes?

I'm. Uh, sure. Rather you than Fury. Thanks.

[ Taken aback slightly, he focuses on making himself useful. ]

I've experimented with nanotechnology before, you'd need an atomic force microscope to get a handle on that stuff just to begin with. To develop any nanobots that could handle significant stress you'd need ... me. [ His blood, to be specific. Mrr. ] Tony, what exactly are you working on?

JARVIS is setting it up now. By the time I land, your account will be active.

[ He's like the gift that keeps on giving. Sometimes. ]

Building a better mousetrap, Bruce. Well, metaphorically speaking. It's... complicated. But by the end of it, I expect that Iron Man will be significantly more useful than what we're looking at currently. I can show you next time you come over, if you want.

You're already more useful than anyone I know.

[ And prone to entertaining really bad ideas, if his suspicions are later to be supported. But that can wait. ]

I'll do the best I can to help, just ... promise me you won't screw around with anything intensely unless I'm there.

[ Tony and his deep-seated inadequacies would disagree. If he felt like acknowledging them, which he doesn't. So like any other compliment that seems genuine, and therefore ensures he doesn't know how to deal with it, he ignores it. ]

Afraid Big Green will have a big red buddy to wreck shit with? Don't be. It's fine. I've got it under control.

[ Famous. Last. Words. ]

That's not funny. [ Cutting across in concern, he frowns at an undeserving thorn bush. ] I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you, especially via those means.

Promise me, Tony.

[ He laughs, the kind of light, airy laughter that's meant to be reassuring. Nothing dangerous to see here, that laughter says. ]

It's okay, really. No gamma radiation, I promise.

If I find out my only friend is a big red blob of rage, I'm not making any promises on being able to hold the Other Guy back.

[ That laughter is reassuring no one, sir. ]

You have plenty of friends, Bruce. What about Steve? He's Captain America. That makes him like everybody's friend by default.

You know what I mean.

We're not going to be twins.

[ His voice takes on a more serious note. ]

I promise. It's not that kind of research.

Okay. That's marginally better. Maybe.

Exactly. See? That's the spirit. You'll see. It's nothing to worry about.

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must dash, bbl!

okay, no prob!

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