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[ofsocksandmemes]

the TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT meme

1. Post your character with their name/canon/pref in the subject.
2. Post a text or wait for someone to send one to you.
3. Respond.
4. ...
5. Profit!

Do I need to say where this was stolen from? Thought not...

Comments

thor odinson | marvel cinema au.

[wrests]

noooo. we thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. but we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. just help us out

[geekybrother]

You really should have looked at the number you sent this to...

Chuck Hansen | Pacific Rim

[suicidemission]

Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.

Re: Chuck Hansen | Pacific Rim

[dangersrighthand]

Did she go with it?

You making a pass at her I mean.

Raleigh Becket | Pacific Rim

[unbreachable]

There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.

Re: Raleigh Becket | Pacific Rim

[dangersrighthand]

I wasn't that drunk, bro I swear to God.

Carol Danvers | Marvel 616/MCU

[cheeseburgermarvel]

At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "Hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"

[split_metal]

Well, my net worth IS pretty high.

Riley Poole | National Treasure

[lookstairs]

They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.

oh god your username <3

[neverminetolose]

all in a days work

Mako Mori | Pacific Rim

[nsynch]

Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.

raylan givens ° justified

[wantmyhat]

You were standing on the table, dancing to the Bee Gees, when I arrived. It was funny until you attempted the 'Stayin' Alive' strut, then it just got embarrassing.

[leftpostitnotes]

What? No. There's no way I was dancing to the Bee Gees.

A minute later...

I was actually strutting?

jodie holmes | beyond two souls

[stopthataiden]

I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.

[leanonstuff]

...what did you do with the sword afterward?

Haruka Tenoh | Sailor Moon

[actsmagnificent]

And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.

[moonpowers]

Oh dear... I hope she was alright?

HOWARD STARK | marvel cinema.

[inventor]

this is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.

AU okay?

[suddenlydinosaurs]

Why? I thought you wouldn't mind, considering the blonde that keeps giving you the come-hither look.

ariadne | inception

[buildindreemz]

Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.

skye ⚔ agents of SHIELD

[haxx]

I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy Halloween everrrr.

[retrieverchef]

Were ya tryin' ta send this ta Hardison?

loki; mcu

[liugan]

What part of I'm done do you not understand? I'm not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on.

Re: loki; mcu

[dangersrighthand]

Dude I wouldn't want sex photos of you anyway, the hell you talking about?

Ianto Jones | Torchwood (Shrouded 'verse)

[dark_teaboy]

Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals

Yancy Becket | Pacific Rim

[dangersrighthand]

I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.

[ibelonghere]

Wait...we fucked to a "viking metal" album? What the hell is "viking metal"?

Sherlock Holmes | Sherlock (BBC)

[consulting_freak]

Did I show you my penis last night?
SH

[acclimatize]

Twice.

Jane Foster | MCU

[rosenbridges]

(979): Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.

[cheeseburgermarvel]

Oh good! I got worried when I had to leave to save one of those people we were harassing.

arthur | inception

[aloadeddie]

Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.

Re: arthur | inception

[dangersrighthand]

THAT WAS NOT ME

britta perry | community.

[ftws]

w/e i hate you. my vagina hates you. i hope a bird shits on your head today

Floyd Lawton, aka "Deadshot" | Pre-nu!52 DCU, after Secret Six #36 | (I altered the text below.)

[goodbadimthguywiththgun]

Oh don't worry, my liver will give out way before I get lung cancer.

Taking a break from log tags to comment spam a bit. Don't mind me.

[delphinidae]

Shouldn't you be more concerned about that though?

Conan Edogawa | Detective Conan

[tantiny]

I ran into the woods like an idiot because-ADVENTURE!

[didnotwant]

That doesn't sound like you. Do you have a fever?

Newton Geiszler | Pacific Rim

[kaijulover]

i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit. help

Re: Newton Geiszler | Pacific Rim

[dangersrighthand]

.....Newt you are beyond help

Jace Wayland | City of Bones | ota

[conceitedhunter]

So the bar isn't gonna put that broken window on my tab. Apparently they want cash.

[rev2220]

you really didn't think this through, did you?

next time, i'm bringing guns.

Manny Horvitz | Boardwalk Empire

[intheicebox]

I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge. With any luck, I'll finish the stove before the wife returns home.

[thetrickyshot]

What sorta cleaner you using? Bloodstains are a bitch to get outta anything.

THOR ODINSON | marvel cinema.

[mjollni]

she was not exactly ladylike


down there

[split_metal]

You say that like it's a bad thing.