bakerstreet | sexting

i thought this girl was hitting on me, then she asked where my sexier half was. which i thought was a good question.

Edited (english is great itll just fuck your shit right up) 2014-08-28 01:11 (UTC)

1/2
how does she even know you have a sexier half? you fulfill that role quite well on your own.

2/2
and I'm lying on my bunk. there may or may not be only underwear involved.

sounds like you're enjoying your night out. ;)

it's not bad. did your fan break or are you enjoying your night too?

my fan broke. it's sweltering.

when you come back, bring me some ice cubes.

[ the please, is implied. ]

hi this is courtney if u need a new fan i'm a big one ;)

hi this is not courtney the phone-stealing lesbian - who is a 9 by the way so how hard should i be wingmaning you here?

ice is on don't worry

Stop leaving your dirty boxers at my place, you baseball freak.

[ Oh no. Grumpy Gokudera. Better make up an excuse. ]

I thought you might miss me!

[Leave it to Yamamoto to have him going from grumpy to livid in 0.2 seconds. That's quite a talent you've got there, kid.]

AND WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THEM, DUMBFUCK?

I dunno! You can wash them? Unless you wanna wear them...

I'M NOT WASHING YOUR DIRTY UNDERWEAR, YOU FUCKTARD. I'M BLOWING THEM UP.

[Because blowing shit up in your own apartment is really smart, Gokudera...]

Don't blow them up! My precious undies (;*△*;)

[ Followed by: ]

Keep a hold of them 'til tomorrow?

Are you anywhere near my galaxy, Amelia?

might be. and if I was?

I hope I won't be in trouble with Officer Pond if I'm ten minutes late?

i made you dinner

i cooked

i ordered chinese

i called for takeout i'm a massive liar. it's in our bed right now, does this turn you on ;*

And here I was looking forward to a home cooked meal. Will you at least be providing a personal dessert of your own?

i call it The Snowcone because you have to suck the goodness out

question: would you like sprinkles or chocolate sauce on it?

Sprinkles will get incredibly messy. Chocolate's a lot easier to lick up.

a wise decision, the snowcone salutes you right now

Isn't it a little too soon for a salute? I don't want it melting before I get home.

it can melt and make a comeback (haha) for wygb, babe, don't cry

Not very fair that I don't get a sample taste of it this round.

you can appreciate this snapchat tho

Don't go sending me things that I can only appreciate for five seconds. :(

five? >:\

Well, it's gone now. Not that I can look at it for long in public anyway.

HAH you're such a FAKE PRUDE, i love it

What do you mean fake prude!?

you in public: 'oh i am in vapors A DICK A PEEN I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS hold me while i faint~!'

you in private: 'gods above i need to GARGLE A COCK RIGHT THIS SECOND why aren't you HARD ALREADY this is BULLSHIT'

f a k e

PRUDE

Okay, I would never use the word "gargle".

[But everything else is totally true.]

but you ARE pushy! just look at the picture, no one else cares

Yes, because I like showing off my boyfriend's dick to the rest of the world.

ahw, is that some jealousy i read

Would -you- show off mine if I sent you a picture!?

????? yes? 'look at this thing it's fucking AMAZING, this is going in me tonight can you even believe it ma'am'

You wouldn't. [Would you? omggg]

yenno, i was going to send you porn/sexts but i see now the error of my ways

you might implode

[ :((( ]

It's not like you make my life easy when you get me hard in public, you know.

am i here to make your life easy or to make you happy? w/e, noted for the future

Happy. Always. Porn or sexting or not. Always.

i'm eating noodles smiling, naked, half-hard as i text you from bed, i feel the need to remind you of this

It's a very nice, very appreciated reminder, I guarantee that.

where are you anyway, nowhere takes this long to get to

Walking home now. I was actually doing work. As much as I'd love to, I can't always immediately come running as soon as you start talking about being naked in bed.

:'( i'm offended

I would if I had the choice!

you should come racing into the streets screaming my name and ripping your shirt in two

But it's cold out. ):

it's also SUNNY

How about I rip my shirt off and scream you name as soon as I walk into the room?

okay, deal, i want to see that

Okay, but this is a nice shirt so there won't be literal ripping. But I will still strip off aggressively. Would that be acceptable?

sounds acceptable, my logical caveman

would you think it was sexy if i called you khal hiccup.

Trying to sweet talk me, are you?

maybe. but i can't offer the iron throne. that belongs to me. dragon rider or not.

Little do you know I can be -very- persuasive in getting you to share.

you'll have to show me, because I highly doubt it.

Hmm, it's a little difficult to do not being face-to-face. It can get kind of physical.

texting is one of the main forms of communication this days, hic. You gotta get used to it.

Then you might have to teach me a bit how to do things your way, Master Stark. I'm still learning after all.

king tony, please. ~~master makes me seem even more creepier oh god~~ and that you are, but you're doing well. consider this a midterm.

Do these "pet names" have to be a part of the test? Because they're actually kind of awful.

[Astrid, he knows you love those dragon design briefs. Totally the reason he's sending an unsolicited picture of a new pair on him and nothing else.

Well there's a hand gesture to, but that's a given.]

How do you like them?

Hmm, I like the colors. A little tight though, don't you think?

[She totally doesn't mind in the slightest, though.]

Now you mention it, the seams do ride a bit.

[This sort of thing makes him more aerodynamic and easier on the eyes to.]

I might need to see a different angle though. The lighting is absolutely awful in that first one.

[Uh huh.]

Funny, you seemed able to see how tight it looked before.

[He's not clueless. Not utterly.]

Oh ~lucky guess~

[Which she knows, but she ain't gonna stop playing sneaky cause of it.]

Edited 2014-08-29 03:54 (UTC)

Uh huh. Well how lucky do you feel?

[Have another picture from the side at a high angle, his face in sight and a single eyebrow up in inquiry.]

Better?

Hmm. That might do. But I can't give a thorough opinion until I see the backside as well. Just for a more accurate review.

[Nothing subtle about this at all, really.]

[Astrid you're tearing him apart, but he abides being the amazing boyfriend he is. That's clearly the reason he's going through with this.

Third time is a charm with a gracious snapshot of his backside and sassy hand on the hip, but those buns and thighs though.]

Gotta be what, 4 stars at least? I've gotten some good reviews in the past.

Hmm, stars might be stretching a bit far. But I'll at least give you a passing grade.

[Never mind the fact that she's completely enjoying that new angle. Mmm.]

Sure those aren't in your eyes? I'm been known to dazzle.]

[Not always with brilliance. He did halfway fall for this ploy besides the starting it part.]

It's not like it's anything I haven't seen--or touched--before.

[Oh, she went there.]

I could cut you off cold turkey right now.

[No he couldn't.]

No more of this vikingness. None. Nope. Gone. GONE.

And I was just about to send you a little preview of things on this end. But I guess if we're cut off, I guess there's no need.

[She can play your game, Hiccup!!!]

You're tempting me, again. I won't fall for it. I'm stronger than that.

[His game is so not strong.]

Are you sure? Because once I put my clothes back on, I don't want to have to go through the hassle of taking them off again.

[And she can play this forever.]

Okay okay, I'm feeling a little generous. No need to hassle with getting dressed again right?]

[Whoops he broke down, whatever will he do?]

I don't know. You don't sound convincing enough. I may have to get dressed after all.

[She will never make your life easy, Hic.]

Will please suffice? Please keep your clothes off, Astrid?

[His life is suffering.]

[Maybe one day she'll get tired of doing that to him, but today is not that day.]

Hmm. I've decided to accept your magical word. As promised, I'll give you that preview.

[And when she says preview, she means preview, sending an image of the side of a bare thigh (a strong Astrid-esque thigh though) with a red lacy strap in view.]

[When that day comes he'll look old and gray, though not for age and all for the suffering he had to endure.]

Those look new and red. Also nice. How many times do I need to say please to see more?

[Cause he can type it out super fast when he's not distracted by Astrid thigh. Strong Astrid thigh with a touch of red.]

Oh, I just don't want your little dragon to get too excited now.

[That's why she's sending a bit more of a visual with a shot of bare thighs on a mattress, red lace underwear now fully in view.]

Little dragon? Really? I'm not going to dignify that with a comeback. And I have control of hormones thank you.

[Lip biting ensues because wow. Just wow. Dragon designed boxers cannot compete at this level.]

Matching pair I presume? Lovely shade of red.

A boy at your age? I find that a little hard to believe, but I'll take your word for it.

[Challenge accepted. Next shot is a little higher, showing an exposed belly and only a hint of a matching brassiere.]

Twenty year old boy, really? I have control, it's just I cater to your whims because I love you.

[At want point did this become a game? Oh, that's right, when he texted her first. That's an angle he can appreciate and it is a matching pair of lacy red.]

-My- whims? I see no whim-catering whatsoever. I have no idea what you're talking about.

[She's totally spoiled. She knows it and loves it.]

Uh huh. Not like I have tons of evidence or anything.

[Not even for a rainy day, it's just there. Course he's love spoiling her, but he's on a roll so let him lay it down.]

I'd imagine that you wouldn't. After all, I'm the one constantly providing you with my love and sweetness.

[Not entirely false, but she definitely lays claim to the throne in the relationship even if she won't admit that.]

Pleading the fifth or should I worry about tampered evidence?

[He's a pushover for a pretty face and soft punches. It's a democracy and there's no throne where he's legislation and she's executive power. Obviously democrat and fair all around.]

Hmm, that love and sweetness does make it hard to say no to your whims.

That was the exact plan. To sway you with my womanly charms and affection. Glad to see I've nailed it.

[He can't hear her, but she's laughing, glee arising just from the enjoyment of their interactions, even in text.]

And what have you been up to tonight? Is does your schedule simply to try and seduce me with your dragon tighties?

A masterly crafted and devious plan. You must have had this running for ages to have me fall for it.

[What he doesn't hear, he can assume since laughter is a very present thing between them; in person or over text. The goofy grin he bares is no accident either.]

Unlike you, I didn't have a plan and played things by ear. Also it's a nightly thing I have to bother you. Seducing and courting optional.

Ah, of course, look at you, always so spontaneous. But I do appreciate the nightly check-ins. Nice to know I haven't been forgotten.

[Psssh, as if she'd ever let him.]

As part of the Haddock charm and flair, you should suspect spontaneous. I'd sooner forget my name than you. No mighty blow to my noggin could have me forgot you, not even one from your hand.

[Forgetful as he is on some things, he isn't forgetful about her. The extra word in helps though.]

I don't know, you've built up a pretty big sense of unpredictability. I can never expect what you might do next to sweep me off my feet.

[But no matter what, as dorky and odd as he can be, he's still a ridiculous romantic because it still warms her heart to hear stupid cheesy things like that.]

And I'm not sure if that says something about your strong memory or the fact that you're thinking my blows are weak.

For all you know, I'm at your window ready to sweep you off your feet.

[Course he's not, though Hiccup is liable to and it's been proven he will. Cheesy and sometimes hammy as his romantic gestures may come off, they're genuine acts of adoration. Laughter happens to come as a bonus.]

Your blows are so not weak. I can attest to that, they've left bruises you know. Okay, maybe those were different bruises, but the point stands you have strong arms and great abs.

Now that I know isn't true, otherwise I would've heard the annoying racket of a metal leg wobbling across the yard.

[Doesn't mean she won't double check just in case.]

And is that so? Please, do go on. Don't tell me the compliments stop at arms and abs.

Okay first, rude. Second, I could sneak up on you so easy. Cat feet. Cat foot and tight not wobbly metal leg.

[Now he has to urge to tighten parts just to make sure he's quiet when he does, and will, sneak up on her. On the other hand the chance of being on the receiving end of a love tap climbs dramatically when he spooks her.]

You've got fine legs, nice and firm. No skipping out of leg day, I can tell. Pretty sure you have nicer calves than me.

If that's the case, I'd really like to see you take up that challenge.

[But really, even if he tried, she'd probably responded with a couple of hits on instinct, so he should really choose wisely.]

And of course I have nicer calves than you. When was the last time you actually put forth an effort to work yours out?

Not to back down from a challenge, but I'm backing down. For fear of life and limb.

[Romantic surprises aren't ever going to happen, unless it's from afar or a present. Those he can do without worry.]

Lets see, every day? I have one good calf and the other is super firm. I do walk a lot after all.

You're really wimping out me already? I'm not gonna bite you, Hiccup. Not really.

[Okay, yes. She could be a biter sometimes.]

Fine, they're decent enough. But don't go slacking off on keeping your exercise up just because you're missing half of one. I like my boys tough and burly, you know. [No, she doesn't.]

I'm not afraid of getting bit much as getting decked out cold.

[He kinda looks forward to getting bit. Then biting back which he pays for dearly later, but it's worth it like leaving visible hickeys.]

I put my weight on that leg, so think I'm fine. Only the burliest and toughest boys. Not like you can throw me over your shoulder and carry me, oh no, I'm far too manly. [He's so on to her.]

I'm small and fragile. What harm could I possibly do to you?

[Shorter, maybe. This is probably the first time Astrid's ever even used the word fragile.]

Ever so mighty. Grip me with those strong arms and carry me over your shoulder. Nothing speaks passion like that grizzly strength.

What's this? A Hofferson calling themselves small and fragile? Blasphemy is afoot I say!

[He's pretty sure she's used it before in context of his feelings, but referring to herself? Never.]

Does it speak more than poetry? Appearing outside thy window in the cold? A bouquet of roses and a charming smile? Oh how foolish of me to skip out on my legs, my laziness is my folly.

[Whoops, he's doing it again.]

I -am- small and fragile. Anything else you say is absolute nonsense.

[A Hofferson can be sensitive too. Maybe. Sometimes.]

You and roses? Now I know you're cracking jokes.

Smaller than me yes, but you are not fragile.

[What mortal man could possibly compete with the demands she puts on her body? Not this one, but he tries and gets sore.]

I'd get you roses. If you wanted them. Do you like roses? I'm going to get you roses now, you wait and see.

Plenty fragile but not fragile enough for something like roses. Way too tacky. Try to be a little more creative, would you?

[It's like it's her job to make things all the more difficult for him.]

Would you like a song instead? I can belt out one with the best of them.

[What's love without some obstacles to over come?]

Oh gods! You singing. I guess getting a laugh is as good as anything.

[Hiccup is quite the masochist for dealing with her.]

My songs may incite laughter, but my lips and tongue are well capable of getting more and better.

[It's a two way street with his amazing puns and wild gestures.]

[Well, well, Hiccup, an interesting choice of words there from you.]

And what exactly can your lips and tongue do to impress me?

[He's a gifted poet with a silver tongue among mortal men, or sometimes he gets a shimmer of brilliance when he isn't tripping over his words.]

Oh plenty m'lady. Sweet nothings in your ear, kissing your lips and body, or making you sing.

Oh, you think your mouth can really do things to make me sing?

[Truth is, it's always had a way of being very persuasive, in many ways.]

I'm confident it can. It's attached to me and I'm more than capable of making you sing. Perhaps even a duet if you can tolerate my off tone singing lone enough.

[Negotiation and diplomacy go a long away and it's gotten further than fighting with his lanky body ever has.]

Hiccup, you and I singing together would be way too dangerous.

[Although a curious thought.]

That makes it exciting though!

[Funny thing, he may or may not be serious about singing now.]

I probably shouldn't be but I'm super curious about what you look like in just your hoodie.

well that's quite a straight forward request from you, missy ;)

what can I say? when curiosity pops up there's no stopping me.

even curiosity comes with a price
what do i get in return hmmmm?

well i suppose it's only fair that you get a similar picture of me...

r you wearing pants?

no. pants are the enemy.

GOOD seriously who came up with pants it's a ridiculous idea when you think of it

I can see their use occasionally, like when I'm working, but the fact that they're not optional in general is a travesty.

underwear works just as well for that

when working with hot metal and fire I like extra layers. I've already experienced it without. never again.

i wouldn't think fabric was much of a barrier for hot metal and fire. Two layers or not.

it's more of a peace of mind type thing than something that actually works. It feels safer.

well that's bullshit pants aren't going to do you any good you should have invented some sort of junk-guard AGES ago

I've only set my crotch on fire once. For the record. It's not something that happens frequently.

did you immediately contact someone with the sole purpose about making a quip about kissing it better I absolutely would have

of course it was the only fun part of the situation.

I'm glad not to be disappointed in you Tony

if anyone didn't grab that opportunity they should be subjected to it again until they do.

soooooo Anything hurting right at the moment?

my balls are pretty sore, landed awkwardly in the suit the other day, so they could use some tlc.

you're not making that idea sound very into I've got to be honest with you.

well you already know you're going to end up doing it so it's not like we need to dance around the bush.

well see if you ever get your balls in anyone's mouth again with that attitude. You're not the not one on my call list you know.

i might not be the only one, but i'm the best.

very confident. All I've got from you so far is that you like attention on your balls. I supposed their wouldn't be any interest in being bent over and fucked then.

if it's the right person, i especially like it over my desk between appointments. also while i'm on the phone.

I figured you'd be the type for quick and dirty

I have a very tight schedule.

you see that just begging for some sort of 'not the only thing that's right' come back. You would be the only to keep talking on the phone while you're being fucked. I'd love to hear you try to keep your calm while you're being opened up from the inside.

I almost added it. i wrote it then deleted it. but it's true.

i can't stop a deal just because i want to get off, and sometimes those meetings take ages. plus it's a fun game i like to play. who can close the deal first? yeah? you should try once.

and the need to get off trumps anything else obviously. I'd love to catch you of guard, interrupt you mid conversation to see how well you keep yor cool.

exactly.

as long as there's no surprise penetration we're good. because ouch.

Too formal? Not formal enough? How do I dress for these fancy dinner dates?

[attachment]

lookin' good, hulk. not bad at all. finally all my hard work with you is starting to pay off. though to answer your question: it would depend on where you're going. most places id say go for it. perfect for a midweek affair, but some places do have dress codes that require a tie so bring one in your pocket.

Where I'm going and when I'm going there is entirely up to you; you know I'm even more terrible at picking out nice places than nice clothes.

do I get to pick who you're going with, too? This is a little creepy Bruce, invasive almost. I know i said I wanted to be a part of your life, but... Do you want something classic or modern?

Sorry, I'm already going with someone. Some idiot named Tony Stark, you might have met him. I think he's a modern kind of guy, but I could be wrong.

Oh I see, I see. Well from what I hear, he'll make exceptions to his high standards if he likes someone enough. They just have to be extra special.

so we're clear, i don't expect you to lick me.

what if I want to?

i know steve asked you to. but i can stay out of your way just as easy.

remind me again what it was steve asked, because i think you might have been snagged by autocorrect up there. not that i'd say no to either thing, more than likely, but it would be weird if steve asked me to lick you.

like.

delete this number.

i'd rather not, so if you want to you'll have to make me. maybe i can lick you when you come over.

i could make you. but i'm supposed to ask. why would you do that.

i'd like to see you try.

fun? i always thought you were more attractive than rogers in the movies and pictures my dad had. you were more rugged.

it's unlikely that you would like it much. it was war, nobody looked delicate. howard stark kept pictures? of me?

I'm into some weird things.

Yeah, but somehow Steve always looked pretty. You were grittier in a good way. Yeah? He had a lot of stuff from back then. Memories, maybe? He never told me since technically I wasn't supposed to know about them.

yes, i know. it's the big blue eyes. all the photos i've seen are in a museum. memories, i guess. still don't remember them all.

have you been googling me, sergeant barnes?

probably. still. not quite my thing. even when i was younger i wasn't into the innocent virginal thing.

if you ever want, i can show you some of the albums of dads. some are dupes of the ones in the museums, but he has a lot of more personal ones, too. he always liked fooling around with that camera of his, after all.

[001.jpg]

(A snapshot of bucky, dumdum, and jaques playing poker.)

yes, but most of the results are inaccurate. there are files. Natalia makes me watch recordings of entertainment tonight. What you called me is also inaccurate. ...thank you?

ah, the intro into pop culture. i had fun with that with steve. do you have a favourite so far?

what should I call you?

anytime.

i watch what steve watches. none of it's exactly fibber mcgee. not sergeant. why weren't you supposed to know?

i actually had to look that up. who would have thought. but no modern favourites, yet? i can give you a pretty decent crash course.

just barnes?

about the pictures? dad wasn't really big on sharing with me, or anyone when it came to his private life. i barely knew him.

steve likes animation. i don't know what i like. not sure i see the point. people used to go to theaters, now they don't and there's too much of everything. if you want. i think... he could be kind of an ass.

he would. Not that animation is bad or anything, but potentially limiting. I mostly have stuff on as background noise, but fantasy is always fun. Lord of the Rings is good, but possibly a little intense. I don't know if you read any back in the day, but if you heard of The Hobbit, it's a continuation of that. You can always still go to theatres. I know of a couple that play old stuff, even have the prices like they were in the old days.

Barnes it is. And maybe James if I'm feeling frisky.

Yeah. Like me.

used to be, the movies were where you'd go on dates. or with steve. are they playing lord of the rings now? not a fan of background noise. i don't know about lick you. guess it's something i should find out for myself.

not regularly, but I'm sure I could get someone to if you wanted to go.

Not a lot of people are. I just like doing multiple things at once.

I have it on good authority that I'm all coconut and metal.

steve's seen it. already crossed off his list. you trust in computer systems to warn you when your security is compromised. which in itself leaves you compromised. coconut? damnit.

i've seen them about five or six times. the long versions to that if you watch them all in a row, it's just short of 12 hours. besides, it doesn't matter what steve has seen or wants, we're talking about you, barnes.

i'm not completely dependant on them, they just help with accuracy and earlier warning. is this a warning, though? have you snuck into my apartment? that's kind of sexy.

;)

you've seen a 12 hour film 6 times. did you take a date? and no. i don't give warnings.

as mentioned earlier, they're usually on in the background when i'm working, especially if i'm working on something that goes on autopilot. but a couple of times i've watched them through.

no. i have yet to find someone willing.

you say that, but that could be you trying to fool me into a false sense of security. where are you?

can't say i'm surprised. find a normal length movie you like, playing at a theater. and i'll go. not behind you.

we could always do them individually. but alright, i'll think of something. no preferences at all? sci-fi? drama? comedy? i don't want you to hate it.

...how did you know i looked?

no preferences. used to like screwball comedies but i'm not so sure they make those anymore. katherine hepburn died. no sudden noises. might be best. nobody completely trusts computers. ... :)

not so much, sorry. but i have a couple in mind now that you might like. that i like, at least. black comedies, always fun. you haven't watched any monty python with steve, have you?

no sudden noises, so no horror. maybe in a years time, but most of the time those are pretty obvious anyway.

are you going to lick me?

his name doesn't ring a bell. saw one about a hostel, when steve was away. it was... irritating. full of inefficiencies. people don't come apart that way. natalia said i shouldn't write with corrections. but it was wrong. as much as i like anyone.

good.

ah, yeah, i think i saw that one at some point. people make a lot of inaccuracies about stuff for the sake of gore and violence, and reaction in general. it's why i can't watch any contemporary science flicks, it drives me crazy. i get it.

am i supposed to come searching for you now, or do you want to come out of your hidey-hole and order chinese and watch a movie with me?

Idk Tony. I don't see the point if you're just downstairs. :|

because you're supposed to be having a meeting and i am bored. 🍆

Which is even more reason NOT to, right?

Why'd you send an emoji of a cucumber?

No. It's the opposite actually. Come on. Live a little.

It's an eggplant, Steve.

You're not going to stop even if I say no, are you?

Ah well, same difference. Still, why?

of course not. Do I ever?

An eggplant and a cucumber aren't even in the same family, Steve. I think at least. And because.

I want to see what you look like sprawled out on my bed naked.

[Thank GOD Tony can't see him. He is beet red.]

very sexy.

(here, steve, have a picture. albeit it's basically black, with a faint blue glow that doesn't lighten much other than his chest. irl troll here.)

Did you just send me a picture of the arc reactor?

[Once he figured out you're a troll, Tony, he might actually attempt to kick your ass.]

yes. it would be present, after all.

I know that. But why did you send me a picture of the arc reactor? And ...some of your chest? Its too dark.

because i can't be bothered to turn a light on.

Doesn't your phone have a light? Or flash?

Or is this just you being a dick?

flash is never flattering.

You're impossible.

Thank you, Steve. I pride myself in it.

Of course you do.

Hope you're enjoying your laugh. I'm gonna go to the gym.

[Yeah Steve feels like he's embarrassed himself enough for one day. Thanks Tony.]

Very much so. I'll see you down there :)

What? Why? So you can laugh at me some more?

[attached.]

♥

Quite lovely. May I ask the occasion?

Do I need an occasion to send you something pretty?

Of course not. I was only making sure that I'm not obligated to send one of a little ribbon tied around my penis in return.

Edited 2014-08-28 05:12 (UTC)

I can think of much better ways to return the favor than that.

I'm open to suggestions.

1. that's not your only photogenic attribute, you know (but the bow isn't required)

2. describing exactly what the photo makes you want to do wouldn't go amiss

3. you know I like your version of surprises.

Who do I have to blow to get a decent drink around here?

That would be either myself or Pam.

Well now, you've properly got a bigger dick out of the two of you.

Have you met Pam?

...No?

She might be offended.

That I don't know her or that I'm claiming that blowing you would be more fun?

That you assumed mine was the bigger dick.

found a red lace bra you need to help me try on

If you insist.

( a picture of it is attached, laying on her bed. a second later, a picture of her naked breasts comes through )

they're cold

Edited 2014-08-27 22:15 (UTC)

So, when are you going to let me see the tattoos? I really should take a close look.

Why, you think you can read them?

[Sigh. So much for trying to be subtle and alluring.]

Well, I am the Messenger of God, I should be able to decipher something. I have better understanding of what he wants than any of my siblings.

[Sorry, Gabriel. Even if Alex were good at this, you're not exactly his ideal partner.]

Yeah but you'd just use their meaning against me.

[Ah well, can't blame a guy for trying.]

Against you? What for? Alex, you have me all wrong. I want to help you.

Help me? How exactly would YOU help ME?

I can guide you. Your destiny is written Alex, you're meant to come to me and for me to teach you what my brother could not. You're better off in my hands than his. He can't be trusted, you already saw that much.

[Alex stares at the message for a long time before replying. He wants to trust Michael, but after learning about the Flood, and seeing what he did at House Thorn...]

Tell me one thing. Do you or do you not want to wipe out the human race?

I want to do whatever it takes to bring my father back. If we discover something in those markings on your body that can do that, then we can end the war.

Edited 2014-08-31 20:37 (UTC)

And if we don't? It's just back to killing all humans?

Not all. I plan to let the worthy survive.

[Least that was the lie he was feeding his Acolytes. It's just so easy to lie over text too, no inflections to fake or expressions to worry about.]

[Meanwhile Alex is practically laughing.]

Exactly who do you consider worthy, then?

The only way you'd find that out if you gave me a chance Alex. I can't explain all of that through text.

I can assure you that the ones you care for will be safe if you cooperate with me.

Fine.

[ It's not like he has much choice. Michael's gone AWOL, nobody else in Vega can help him. And besides, maybe if he goes to Gabriel, he'll be able to save Noma. ]

I'll come.

I'm glad to hear that.

Shall I anticipate your arrival in a few days or should I come give you a lift?

I've had enough of being dragged off the street, thank you. I'll get there when I get there.

Ah, Michael's being direct again I see.

Fair enough.

sexting

Darcy Lewis | mcu | ota

natasha romanova | mcu

mako mori | pacific rim

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1/2

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Allen Walker | D. Gray Man | M/F

Konoka Konoe | Mahou Sensei Negima | OTA

Kaga | Kantai Collection (Kancolle) | OTA

Takeshi Yamamoto | KHR! | M/M

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amy pond • doctor who

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niklaus mikaelson | the vampire diaries/the originals | ota

stefan salvatore | the vampire diaries | ota

Noh-Varr » Marvel 616 » OTA

Marcus Milton » Marvel 616 » OTA

hiccup horrendous haddock iii ☁ how to train your dragon

the way to a viking's dick is through his belly

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astrid hofferson ♦ how to train your dragon

feel free to shoot this dork down