The Criminal AU Meme

[cerebel]

THE CRIMINAL AU MEME

Warning: This meme will contain violent content and possible triggers.



HOW TO PLAY:
1) Post a comment below, detailing your character and canon. For best results, DO NOT LEAVE THIS COMMENT BLANK; pick a role, or an AU, or write up a little on what you'd like to explore with your character.
2) Tag around and make magic happen.
3) If you get stuck, use RNG to select from the options below.

THE ROLE.
1) Criminal. (The one who committed the act.)
2) Law enforcement. (Cop, FBI, prison guard.)
3) Witness. (What did you see?)
4) Victim. (Probably not applicable in the case of murder. … Probably.)
5) Lawyer, judge, or paralegal. (Participant in the legal system.)
6) Private security. (Unaffiliated, but with an interest in keeping your client safe. Or in getting your target caught.)
7) Other. (Let your imagination go wild.)

THE CRIME.
1) ROBBERY. The crime of stealing via force or threat or fear.
You need the money. You're desperate. You have the gun, the convenience store is right there, and everything will be better once you've finished the job.

Or maybe you've been hired. Provide a little intimidation, and someone else will take care of all your problems.

Or it's a thrill. Rolling across the country, robbing banks as you go. A Bonnie & Clyde crime spree, and it can only end one way.

2) BURGLARY. Illegal entry into a building for the purposes of committing theft.
Non-violence, for you; you're just going to break in, take this one thing. Maybe a television, to sell for the cash. Maybe some jewelry, a computer.

Or maybe you're a master thief, dangling from a wire into a museum. Sliding through the air ducts of a skyscraper in search of a particular little item.

3) GRAND THEFT AUTO. The criminal act of stealing a motor vehicle.
You know your cars. And you can steal one in under 60 seconds. Better hope you don't get tripped up with one of those newfangled security systems.

4) MURDER. The act of killing another.
He had to die. He had to, and the guilt of knowing where you buried the body, of knowing that the police are coming after you -- it's starting to wear down your sanity.

5) SERIAL MURDER. A crime involving the killing of three or more people over a period of more than a month.
You have a drive to kill. Again, and again. Nothing satisfies it, nothing stops it. Maybe you hate yourself. Maybe you hate the human scum who only exist to go under your knife.

Or maybe you're a professional hit man. You've killed dozens, you know how it goes. It's just business.

6) CONSPIRACY. An agreement between two or more persons to break the law at some time in the future.
Mafia, Yakuza, crime families who keep their operations quiet under pain of death, dishonor, betrayal of the family. You're part of one of these operations, whether as a patriarch or a peon.

7) FRAUD. Intentional deception made for personal gain.
Blackmail. Cover-ups. Insider trading -- the marks of corporate crime. Perhaps you're a CEO who thinks they can do whatever they want. Perhaps your business is on the rocks and you just need a little time to make your golden parachute before you ditch it.

Or maybe you meant to destroy it. Maybe you're a professional con man, and you're stepping away from your latest conquest with plenty of cash in hand.

8) KIDNAPPING. The false imprisonment of another person against their will.
Do you do it for the ransom? For the money? For revenge?

Or is it a hostage situation, with dozens of prisoners, for some sort of political gain?

9) TERRORISM. The systematic use of terror, especially as a means of coercion.
For a religion, for a philosophy. But -- are you a terrorist, or are you a freedom fighter? It might just be a matter of point of view.

10) WILD CARD. For any crime not mentioned above.

Comments

[lasiurus]

"I want you to stop robbing people. Like I said. You want help for this place? I can give it." It seems Wayne Enterprises had been, until a few years ago. "But if a single button goes missing, I'm going to hand you over to the police."

[newboyontheblock]

"I can't just stop," he says mutinously. "I won't be made useless, okay. Fuck that. I'm not going to live off of charity. The boys are one thing, but not for me."

[lasiurus]

"...All right." He says it grudgingly, but he has to respect that mentality. "Then you can get a job. You can get one working for me, if you want. We'll keep an eye on each other."

[newboyontheblock]

John gives him a sickly-sweet smile. "Aw, that's cute. Domesticating the nasty thief, are you?"

There's a part of him, the child that idolized Bruce Wayne and loved Batman, that cringes away from what he's doing, what he's saying. He wishes he could stamp out that part of him.

[lasiurus]

"Oh I wouldn't let you in my home, John," Bruce returns with an equally sickly smile. "But I might let you around my office."

[newboyontheblock]

"Kinky." He laughs, teases, because it's easier than facing what is actually going on. A negotiation for whether or not John may get sent away. And he won't go, of course, even if he gets caught. But then they'll know to watch the Home and he won't be able to come back and that... That isn't acceptable.

[lasiurus]

Bruce watches him, not a flicker of a smile on his face now. He knows he has John pinned with something sensitive; he just doesn't' know how far John will go to get out of it.

[newboyontheblock]

There they stand for a long moment, neither willing to back down, but Bruce has the advantage and he knows it. Finally, John looks away, though he's careful to keep his shoulders from slumping, careful to keep the proud tilt to his chin. "Fine. What do you want me to do?"

And if he doesn't like it, he'll find his own way around it. He's a survivor.

[lasiurus]

"Show up to the office tomorrow around noon." Because Bruce wakes up very late, for a businessman. "Wear something that won't stand out."

[newboyontheblock]

"Suit and tie, right..." He's been to the Tower before, though he wouldn't mention it. "Yessir."

[lasiurus]

"I mean it. Show up." It's rare that he gets really gruff, but he is now. He looks away as the kids start filtering back in, and spares only one last hard look at John before he turns and walks away.

[newboyontheblock]

He watches Bruce go, fighting the sudden (immature) urge to stick his tongue out at his back. He doesn't realize how tense he is, how tightly his hands are clenched at his side until one of the boys tug on his arm and John looks down, smiles with a little effort.

The next morning, he gets dressed carefully, a three-piece suit one of his clients once bought him. It's slim-cut, hugs his hips and thighs beautifully, and John knows it. He might as well leave some sort of impression if he's going, regardless of whether it'll be good or bad.

He arrives at half-past noon, taking the elevator up to Wayne's office and giving his secretary a flirtatious smile. "Hi," he says, "I'm expected, I think?"

[lasiurus]

The secretary smiles at him and ushers him right inside, based on orders. Bruce is there, looking groggy behind his sunglasses, nursing a large cup of coffee.

"Hey. Glad to see you made it."

[newboyontheblock]

"Aw, late night?" As if he hadn't seen the news reports: Batman busted a drug-dealing ring near the docks; the fight lasted through most of the night.

[lasiurus]

The smirk he gives is practiced and arrogant. "Something like that." He has a club stamp on his hand, and there are pictures in the tabloids of him with the drummer of a very large band.

"I can't let you near anything sensitive, since you can't seem to control your hands...can you type?"

[newboyontheblock]

John tosses his head arrogantly, "Better than you." And if he's allowed on a company computer, oh the things he could do.

[lasiurus]

"Good. Then you can type for me." And maybe Bruce Wayne should be foolish enough to offer a computer to someone...but Batman isn't. He has a typewriter.

A fucking typewriter.

[newboyontheblock]

"Are you shitting me?" John stares at the typewriter, then back up at Wayne. "Where the fuck do you even get one of these things these days?"

[lasiurus]

"It was my father's." Bruce shrugs indifferently. "It's more secure than a network. How fast can you type?"

[newboyontheblock]

John scowls, but turns to look back at the typewriter, fingers barely brushing over the surface of it. It's a beautiful machine, really, carefully maintained and clearly still in perfect working order. "Not as fast as I would on a computer," John finally says, truthfully. "But still fast."

[lasiurus]

"You'll learn." Which is what he probably would have said, either way. He dictates to John, letters to send to different people, memos. They're all painfully boring, except for the ones he uses to flirt with a few women.

[newboyontheblock]

He does his work quietly, but he's quickly bored, and his mind begins to wander, letting his fingers type automatically. He'd tried working conventionally once, a terribly boring office job that lasted about three months before he quit.

The flirting is marginally more interesting, though it's pretty clear he isn't sincere about any of them. "You know this sounds like a bad Hallmark card, right."

[lasiurus]

"Then it's a good thing that's what these women like." He says, without quite looking up from his phone. "How would you phrase it?"

[newboyontheblock]

John shrugs. "You don't have to be sincere to sound sincere."

[lasiurus]

Bruce contemplates this, and shrugs. "Let's hear an example, then. Try to woo a shallow socialite."