bakerstreet | thursday pic prompt

thursday pic prompt

the picture prompt meme

i. COMMENT WITH CHARACTER
ii. OTHERS LEAVE A PICTURE (OR TWO OR THREE....)
iii. REPLY TO THEM WITH A SETTING BASED ON THE IMAGES.

THIS POST WILL BE IMAGE HEAVY.

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[Yes, excellent. If only all phones were waterproof by default.]

It was noteworthy, as far as Aurus was concerned, that Hank elected to speak about neither sex nor death but instead mutants. That perhaps gave a first indication about the relative openness these topics enjoyed.

Of course he had also set himself up to be able to pass at least a few things under the banner of cultural difference now: by saying that sylvari tended to be rather blunt about sex and death he ought to have excused himself for being blunt about the same topics. (The truth of the matter was that he personally was never obliviously blunt about either; only intentionally so. Some other sylvari that he knew would probably have scandalized either Charles or Hank or both of them already.)

"What else do you not ask about, aside from mutant abilities? You avoid speaking candidly to children about certain topics? That's a trait of human culture in my world, though it seems to me that there's little clear agreement on what age precisely the expectation changes.

"Having never been a child myself I find that the particulars have never felt very intuitive. And I am going to meet your students, so it's probably best if I know in advance."

Again, all true, strictly speaking, though also played for effect: the remark about having never been a child was deliberately placed to surprise, since that was something Hank didn't know about him yet. It also presented a detour away from the topic of Charles, a diversion so that he could circle back around an approach the subject more obliquely.

[It's so damn stupid that they aren't. The majority of phones in Japan and China are... they know they can make a lot of money on it here.]

Well Aurus' attempt to shock certainly got that reaction. Hank's brows shot right on up, blinking at the idea. So the sylvari... were born as adults? That concept was so very foreign to him that it took several moments to put it together, a hand coming up to rub at the bridge of his nose before resettling his glasses. Focus on the rest, Hank, focus on the rest.

"Please don't discuss sex or death with them? That's... considered taboo to speak about to children, even with adults to certain degrees. Your bluntness might comes as a bit of a... shock to some people, though of all people I imagine Charles might laugh it off." Here he paused and fixed Aurus with a look, a harder look. If there were certain thoughts in there, he hoped this would edge them out. "We've gone through a lot, some of us. Certain subjects might be harder than others, and some might be all but twisting a knife. Tread carefully."

Sometimes, maybe a little more of that darker (bluer) side of him came out than he would have liked.

In all honesty, Aurus did not actually need to be told not to discuss sex or death with the students. He was not nearly that tactless. The question had served a purpose though, moving the conversation into interesting (albeit not exactly anticipated) waters.

For a long moment Aurus held a level gaze with Hank--this was a side of the man that he'd not seen before, and it intrigued him to discover what there was beyond his slightly awkward geeky charm.

He did, however, find that he needed to make a decision now: he'd not intended to disclose anything specific about his relationship with Charles. He did not want to break Charles' confidence or reveal anything private that he would not wish anyone to know.

But this warning that Hank was issuing came, if Aurus read it right, from a genuine concern for his friend. Aurus could dodge the subject, but that would only build unease and mistrust. He had to weigh that against the possibility that Charles would not want Hank--evidently his closest friend--to know. This really was one instance where Aurus wished he knew more about the attitude towards intimate relations in this world, so that he could know just how secret these sorts of matters were generally kept.

In the end, though, only one approach really felt right to him. "I assume that we are no longer speaking about the students," he said, though the way he said it conveyed quite precisely I know we are no longer speaking about the students. And his lack of surprise at Hank's words on its own perhaps conveyed that yes, Aurus had already seen how difficult some subjects were.

"Charles is an exceptional person, and if I understand you right, I believe that you are worried about him. Worried because of me."

Well he had no idea just what Aurus did or didn't know and he would be beside himself if he didn't say anything and Aurus went and spoke to the students about such a thing. The older students would be fine but not the children. Better to cover all of the bases properly. For the rest, Aurus would be right. He was worried about Charles. Even after the time since Logan had left the school and the circumstances had happened those years back. Charles tended to do two things - either throw himself into the fire or barricade himself so much from it as to freeze from lack of warmth. It was just natural now to try and keep him from both extremes, to protect Charles from himself.

He reached up and took his glasses off, pulling a kerchief from his pocket and started cleaning them. "In part, I was," he said quietly, his gaze focused on his work in ihs hands. "Some of the students have gone through those tragedies and we're helping them to work past that, but otherwise, you're right. We're not." He lifted his glasses up to the light to inspect them carefully, then returned them to his face.

"I don't know what's going on between you two, but I'm letting you know to tread carefully. You asked the differences between our cultures, the relationships between certain genders, and I'm telling you. In matters of certain subjects, you take time, you learn, you walk carefully, if you know that the ground between you is hazardous. You don't want to fall into a hole, and you don't want to set off an explosion that could hurt you both. Regardless of who you're talking to."

That move--removing glasses, wiping them clean--was such a tactical way to disengage from continued eye contact that Aurus couldn't help but wonder what it was that Hank was keeping hidden. For the moment though, his attention was not on excavating that particular mystery.

Instead he took the time to think about what Hank was (and wasn't) saying and to measure how he wanted to answer him. In truth though, he was missing a fairly crucial piece of information which would shape just how he took Hank's advice.

Which meant that Hank was about to experience some of that bluntness Aurus had spoken of. Not sylvari bluntness per se; this was purely Aurus's particular version of it:

"You needn't worry for your students--I'm really not that indelicate. But I need to ask you, Hank, were you and Charles ever lovers?"

This time it wasn't merely a question for shock value. Aurus felt that he needed to know for sure, because if Hank and Charles had once been lovers sometime before Charles' injury--if they'd once been lovers and Hank had sat by and let this kind of isolation take hold in Charles' life for a whole decade since--that, to Aurus, would be a kind of abandonment from which he could accept no counsel.

Well congrats on getting him to choke, Aurus. Hank coughed hard, actually putting a hand down to steady himself for a second as he stared at Aurus before shaking his head. That certainly was blunt! "No!" Okay that probably sounded awful, so he repeated him, softer. "No. I like women, to start with," oh that felt far too personal to be telling a stranger out of the blue. "Charles... wouldn't be my type even if I didn't. He has his own tastes." Ones that ran usually to the beautiful as well as intelligent, quick thinking and sharp and well generally female from what he had seen in their years.

Erik was... an exception, but he wouldn't talk to a stranger about that.

Aurus was quite purposefully not going to ask Hank to elaborate on the topic of Charles' tastes. For one thing it seemed rather undignified to him, and for another, there was a very fine but specific line that he wanted to maintain between talking about himself with regards to Charles and talking about Charles behind his back.

That didn't for a moment prevent him from appreciating the reaction his question had gotten. (He would thoroughly enjoy that when he played it over in his mind later.) Since fair was fair though, he would answer Hank's disclosure with one of his own, even if it meant continuing to scandalize with his bluntness.

"I care for Charles, and yes I am interested in him. I've told him as much. Directly. I suppose at this point it would be fair to say that I'm trying to seduce him--I'm confident he knows that very well too, just as he knows it's up to him to decide whether to accept my offer. If you want to know his thoughts on the topic you'll have to ask him, but as I gather my thoughts are your more immediate concern I will tell you:

"For all that he is surrounded by people, Charles seems to me to be terribly isolated and alone. I don't know if it's him or your whole world that tells him that chair must be his confinement, that his body is a traitor for which he must live cut off from all sensual pleasure, but I don't believe it needs to be that way. Please don't think that I'm behaving thoughtlessly towards him. I promise that is not the case."

Aurus let this all settle for a moment before continuing: "As to the rest, I'm not sure if you're trying to tell me that the fact of us both being male presents some particular difficulty here. If so, that's something I was admittedly unaware of."

That confirmed that, then. Really, this was a wholly awkward discussion for Hank, even if he was trying to hide it as much as possible for Charles' sake. Really, this whole conversation was for Charles sake but it was entirely uncomfortable. So he sighed quietly, splaying a hand flat on the table beside him. Fine. If they were going to go there, then he would go there.

"You don't know Charles," Hank said quietly, somewhat flatly. That awkwardness showed. "Don't hurt him, Aurus. He's gone through hell and back and he's finally on the better side of things. YOu call him isolated and alone..." He looked to the other, meeting those alien eyes. "You have no idea. You don't."

He wouldn't tell everything; that was for Charles to decide, but he knew he would have to tell to some degree to make sure the other understood the full issues at hand. "Things were much worse, far worse just a few years back. Despite everything he's done, and we've tried, this is where we've managed to get at this point. Do not... set it back."

With that, he looked away and let his head hang. "Yes, the... both being male thing would be... frowned upon."

Though Aurus could see Hank's discomfort, he did not personally share it. He really was fine with this level of directness (or even more) about intimacy, sex, eroticism. He'd been playing up the sylvari element of that so far, but this was also just his personal style.

"You're right, I don't know him. And I don't know what he's been through. I don't ask you to tell me either. I believe that's for him to do in his own way, when he chooses. I'll admit that I'm concerned even about the conversation you and I are having now--particularly given what you say about relationships between men, I worry he may feel I've broken a confidence, disclosed something too private to you by discussing this in the first place, however much I try to remark on myself only.

"But it may be because I don't know him that I am purely taking him as he is. If he decides he's not interested in me then that will be the end of it. But if he closes that door because he believes he 'can't' be intimate with anyone?" Aurus shook his head, "There's no kindness in abandoning anyone to that place.

"I promise that I have no desire to hurt him." He breathed a bit of a sigh here because of course he knew that as a stranger his words of reassurance would likely mean little to Hank.

"You've no reason to trust me on any of this, but I do think you should trust him. There's much you don't know about me that he does, and if I was trying to trick him in some way I'm quite sure he'd know." He tapped his temple with his forefinger to punctuate his meaning, giving Hank a smile that he hoped would put his mind at least somewhat at ease.

"I don't think I have any assurances to offer on the sameness of our sex though, I'll admit that. Sylvari have no offspring. We engage in sex purely for the pleasure of it, so gender is of course inconsequential. I shall make it a point to be discreet in front of others. But are you saying that a male couple is something you would frown on?"

[Hank: This may be the second most awkward discussion in my life. The first was also thanks to Charles. The third is thanks to his sister. :\

Also trying to work through how someone in the 80s would think about same-sex is interesting to think on.]

Without going into all of the details, it was almost impossible for Aurus to fully understand, as far as Hank thought. About the scenario around the loss of the use of his legs, the man who, however unintentional, had been the reason behind it, how his sister and Erik leaving him, the death of the children, and his own choice to 'save' Moira all weighed on his shoulders until he had broken. The drugs, the loss of the school... he sighed even as some of those ran through his mind, feeling some of that weight all over again. Maybe part of this was guilt. Guilt because he couldn't help Charles any more than he had, because he had been the supplier of the drug, because he knew at a certain point there was nothing else he could do.

For several moments, so much moved across Hank's face, partially seen as he looked down at the lab table without really seeing it.

"I do trust Charles, but I also know that he hasn't always made the best decisions for himself. There is nothing I can do to stop what is going to happen, if it's going to, but he can be blind when it comes to certain things... which is why I'm telling you any of this." He took a breath and let it out slowly, listening, but the very last question left him needing to take a short time to think it over.

Did it bother him? He frowned, working over his own thoughts and morals in the matter of seconds, before saying cautiously, "I try not to get involved in the relationships of others. As long as it doesn't hurt anyone else, people can just... do as they want." There was the decided notion that until he had seen Charles and Erik and their strange ... whatever had been between them, he hadn't really had to deal with any same-sex relationship. It was sort of... weird to him, but in the end, when it came to Charles, he just wanted the man to be happy. He needed some joy in his life that was for him, not for the good of the world, or the students, or the x-men, but just for himself.

[Poor Hank. Aurus is...well, not really all that sorry if we're being honest. But a little bit sorry. ~~A very little bit.~~
And yeah the 80s, such a baaaaad decade for homophobia, especially in the US. There was all the AIDS panic, the government's refusal to publicly acknowledge the health crisis...and of course (later in the decade) all the direct action work of ACT UP with all the media coverage that went with it, plus the art of Gran Fury. I think it totally makes sense for Hank to have a bit of unease, even as he tries to keep a live-and-let-live sort of attitude.]

"If you're worried that Charles is rushing into something incautiously, then I can assure you that's not the case," Aurus offered, watching the troubled expression cross Hank's features like a shadow. He could not guess at the things Hank was thinking--the topic of Erik (oh he would have had many opinions on that), or of Moira, or that there was so much more conflict to the story of Raven beyond that she was just out in the world somewhere on a journey of self-discovery. His only understanding was much more general.

"Perhaps I am wrong, but it seems to me that for a man who can so freely see into other people's minds, Charles has turned strikingly away from whatever it is that haunts his own. I don't know the specifics of what haunts him, but if that's what you mean about him being blind to certain things then I think I take your meaning.

"All I can tell you is that whatever happens I intend to treat him in the best--the most honest--way I can. I tend to find that's the wisest foundation for a relationship with anyone I invite into my head. At some point with such things one finds that there's nowhere to hide oneself anyway, so it's best to not try and avoid it." Maybe that would sound odd to Hank who knew so much less about Aurus's collection of constant mental companions.

At any rate, he did feel that they ought not push the topic too much further just now. With the situation as it stood, how much more could they really say? And he did want to give Hank some manner of relief from the awkwardness that this subject clearly caused him.

"Come, let's talk about something else, and if you see me doing or saying something to Charles that concerns you may pull me aside and tell me so, and I promise to at least take it under advisement."

Edited (I'm sorry for the late edit. I've been thinking about this tag since I sent it feeling like it should have ended a paragraph earlier, soooo. Mea culpa!) 2016-11-18 17:38 (UTC)

[*pats Hank gently* He tries. And yeah, pretty much. Hank's a good guy, and as he gets older he'll mellow out even more, but right now he's still young and the world around him makes everything darker in this particular area. He doesn't quite fully know what to believe about it, but there's that part of him that says as he vocalized, but he's got that damned social stigmata to get around right now. ...Plus god damn it, Erik. (And the edit was FINE no problem!)]

"...trust me, as long as I've been around him, I wonder how a man so intelligent, capable of looking into the minds of others, can realize so little about himself." But hearing that Aurus was so easy in allowing Charles into his mind came as a surprise, which Hank immediately assumed meant that Aurus either didn't fully understand just what that meant or it was a difference in culture. Perhaps the other didn't actually mind because- well, Hank wasn't sure. The whole thing was a little bit confusing, really.

He let out a quick breath and nodded. "Fine." A little tight, clearly not entirely comfortable with the situation. "For right now... let's just see where things go." But he planned to talk to Charles about this. In the end, all he wanted from all of this was to make sure that Charles came out the other side at least as good as he was now. They had worked hard to get this far, and while he couldn't completely help Charles in the depths of all of his problems, he wanted to protect what he could from backsliding.

A part of him wondered if he was going too far, if he wasn't meant to be pushing himself to be involved in this, but he just couldn't help himself. If Raven had been here... he knew she would have been doing the same. Another part of him wondered if maybe, just maybe... Aurus could be good for Charles. Break him out of that remaining darkness. Do what he hadn't been able to. He could only hope for that bit of luck.

[It totally makes sense for him, given how strongly he aspires to be normal in his youth. That desire for normalcy could so easily spill from one area of life into the next, and especially for someone who doesn't personally know any of those people getting vilified in the media. For the record, I don't mind at all when RP includes characters whose perceptions are...uncomfortable to contemporary sensibilities. So whatever personal struggle Hank might need to go through, I'm happy to play it out, even if he ends up saying things that would make us cringe if someone said them irl. (And thank you! Honestly I think 8 out of 9 mental cylinders are powered down for me today. Like here comes return of the last paragraph version 2.0 one tag later. /shakes head at self)]

Well Aurus certainly thought he could be good for Charles! But then Aurus was often that frustrating sort of person who had the strength of his convictions and the will to put them to action, even when the people around him were still at the skeptical side-eyeing stage. He smiled at the remark about Charles realizing little about himself--he took Hank's meaning, but it was also an endearing sentiment being expressed about a friend.

At the moment Aurus was aware that he could probably do with getting Hank a little bit more on his side, which he hoped would evolve naturally if the man got to know him a little bit more. It would be easier, he thought, if he could get Hank talking about himself little bit--in his way Hank was even more guarded than Charles was: very friendly on the surface, but revealing absolutely nothing personal whatsoever.

"Agreed," Aurus assented to the see-where-things-go strategy, making it a point to accept it all with a casual, relaxed demeanor. He then turned his attention to their surroundings, a purposeful shifting of focus as he cast his eyes around the lab and all the myriad foreign things there.

"So, since I'm sure that you don't spend all your days making volcanoes for children, I assume that you must have research projects of your own. Tell me about what you do, what you make, what you're interested in." Scientists liked to talk about their inventions, right? At least on the surface it seemed like it would be a good ice breaker.

[I seriously don't know what luck I had to get you as an RP partner but damn am I happy you tagged me. <3 There might be a tiny bit of cringe, but we'll see. I tend to let things go as they will. I hope things are going better, btw. Things have been crazy here. Between sudden adventure into playing White Wolf with a group of friends in a one shot, a massive wind storm that turned a 70 degree day into a night full of hail, MORE wind the next day and it's damaging things around here now, a meeting for the LARP I run... @_@ Lots of running around. However, new Pokemon game is making things better. XD ]

With another breath to settle his nerves, Hank decided, for now, to focus on this new topic. While he wasn't about to show Aurus anything he was working on for the X-Men, with his 'special' lab down in the halls below, he still had several things in progress up here. Small things, nothing world changing except for the people it was meant for.

He would end up showing Aurus a pair of gloves he was attempting to make that would allow better feedback for a young man who, when touching any biological surface, found himself slowly changing to that surface. It reminded him so very much of Darwin sometimes that it hurt, but only a few remained to even know that pain. The tiny sensors he was attempting to use, but currently the issue was simply size. The size of everything was too great, too bulky, in his opinion, for easy daily use.

"...I'm not going to give up on this project, but it might mean waiting until people better than me in electronics can get together and figure out how to make this stuff smaller." He shook his head, clearly displeased at feeling cheated. "If I could get it, it would work. I'm sure of it."

[I totally feel the same way! Like wow, what serendipity is this--it so rarely happens and I am still so very chuffed about it! Your tags always light up my inbox. <3 Gosh it sounds like you've got loads of fun things going on! Ok, wind and hail storm not so fun, but the rest sounds lovely. Not damaging hail I hope? For me stuff is mostly just manic. Second-to-last week of teaching now (terms here are only 12 weeks) and then they have exams (final paper for my lot), and then it's all over! Seems that I'm not going to be teaching next term because low enrollment = many canceled classes, so that's...a thing. But I'm trying to tell myself I'll use the time to work on my own research or something.]

Of course Aurus would never have guessed that there was another lab with other, more secret, inventions. Why would he when what Hank showed him here provoked so many thoughts, so many questions?

He was fascinated by the gloves, but also by the ability they were made for, and he had to admit there were a few things he didn't understand. "So your goal then is to enhance his ability--to make it faster and allow him to control it better, not to impede it--is that correct?

"It's amazing to think of. So does that mean, if this young man were to touch me, he would slowly begin to change into a plant? ...Or into a sylvari? How deep would the change go? All the way into his bones, his blood? It makes one think about the border between your race and my own, wouldn't you say?"

Much the same train of thought led him to further comparisons: While he could understand the desire to make the gloves more streamlined and lighter weight, he couldn't help contrasting them in his mind with the huge bulk of asuran golems, compared to which they looked downright delicate and refined.

"My hesitancy about the race notwithstanding, I would love to know what an asura would make of these, and what you would make of their golemancy techniques--whether you would have insights to share with each other. I wish there were a way I could facilitate such a meeting, but I'm afraid it wouldn't be as easy as inviting Charles into the Dream to see my homeland." (He'd forgotten for the moment that Hank knew nothing of the Dream, nor of the idea that he was proposing to bring Charles into it, even as a visitor. So of course it didn't occur to him for a moment that he might have said anything potentially...alarming.)

[Likewise. <3 Not damaging hail, but we ended up witnessing a terrible accident because of it. :( Motorcycle ended up sliding on the hail, got completely taken out by an oncoming car. Guy was life flighted out. The college I went to was only 12 week terms so that sounds normal to me! Ug final papers can't be easy to grade... how long are the papers? ...I feel like an idiot asking this but have I even asked what you teach? I probably have and forgot. Oh geez... that's no good. Well, I mean you'll get to research but still.]

"A little of both, actually," Hank started. "It needs to impede his ability when he doesn't want it to happen. You don't want to be holding a spoon and start turning into metal. But right now, he has to wear gloves all day and night along with clothing that covers every inch of his skin and it limits his ability to handle things, to feel things... so I'd like them to allow him to feel as you or I would normally and if he chooses to use his ability it would allow him to do so. If I can only manage the former, he could remove the gloves to use his ability so the impedement becomes the greater concern." It was clearly something he was enthusiastic about, something he put a lot of time into.

"As far as we can tell, the change only goes skin deep. His skin would become like yours, but it wouldn't go into the core of him. If he touches this table, his skin will become like that. It's fascinating to watch, actually. Charles hopes one day to find a better way to control it so that a more normal life can be led, but for right now, gloves have been the easiest solution."

Then Aurus went and said that, which left Hank staring at him before holding up a finger. "Wait, wait, wait a second. What do you mean 'inviting Charles into the Dream'? What dream?" This sounded like something more than letting Charles see memories, which would have been his initial guess.

[God that sounds terrible. Motorcycle accidents can just be some of the most horrific. (Vaguely related: motorcycle drivers in the UK are MENTAL and the driving laws here encourage them to be--like they can legally drive between lanes of traffic on the motorway. I can't believe there aren't more fatalities.)
My class this term was British Studies (I can't actually remember if I ever told you that either!). As for the papers, they're only 6-8 pages, so not long, but the ESL aspect makes the marking a bit tricky. They get to choose their topic and most of them are writing on something Brexit-related. If they leave the term with a good understanding of the larger cultural context that brought us to that vote then I'll feel I've done my job! I'm just hoping that I can ride this term of teaching for the emotional sustenance to move forward. I have a lot of projects I should return to if I can find the heart for them.]

Aurus still had more questions about this boy's abilities and their implications. (How, for example, did his skin not take on the characteristics of the clothing that he wore? And how did it feel to touch a surface with metal skin? Though to be fair he supposed to a human that would probably only beg the question of how it felt to touch a surface with leaf skin like his...)

But before he got a chance to ask about those further, Hank was questioning him about the Dream, and he supposed that yes he really should explain that.

"The Dream of Dreams. It's like the collective memory of the sylvari race."

Perhaps he should backtrack a little. "I told you that we are never children and that we bear no children of our own. What I didn't tell you is that, before we awaken, when we are still growing on the Tree, we all share in the Dream. It imparts us knowledge of the world. Not great detailed knowledge, but a basic framework--how to speak and read and write, for example. After we awaken, we retain a certain connection to it. It reflects our deeds, our experiences, the things we learn.

"Entering the Dream can be like entering many places in my world, but core among them is the place where we come from, where the Pale Tree grows. That's what I've invited Charles to come see."

Clear as mud, right?

[That driving between lanes thing is a thing here too and it's CRAZY. Oh my god. I've seen motorcyclists doing the stupidest things. I felt bad for this one... ti was 70 degrees earlier that day, probably got caught out because the storm came in fast, just wiped out on the hail. :( That's actually really neat! I will admit I am woefully ignorant on the whole thing of Brexit. I feel like i need to go on the reddit /r/ExplainLikeImFive to understand the thing unless I had someone like you teaching me. XD What kind of projects are/were you working on??]

He could have answered that (they found one material his body didn't seem to want to absorb - of all things it could have been, it was cotton - and his clothing was made of as such. Hank's theory was the first time ever the young man changed, it happened to be in 100% cotton jean shorts while out swimming with his friends) but the rest Aurus would have had to ask the young man himself.

As for the Dream, Hank was frowning as he listened, his fingertips tapping slightly on his knee as he tried to puzzle through all of this new information. So the sylvari had some sort of low-level psychic connection to each other or more so to some sort of hive mind that was this tree? They called it the Dream.... and now Aurus was inviting Charles to come tap into some alien psychic hive mind.

Hank's expression couldn't have gotten much more unhappy. "Remember my exact statement about Charles blindly going into things that could hurt him?" A lot said with that one statement. Charles didn't know if this could hurt him or over whelm him. How would they break Charles out if it happened? (Oh he would have flipped if he knew drugs were involved both on the praying not to get Charles on that boat and/or more dangerous!)

[It might stand out more in the UK because people really do only overtake on one side, whereas in the states they pass in whatever lane there's space to do it in. But regardless, still people taking their lives into their hands. There aren't yet really any traditionally published books on Brexit since its so recent, but this e-book is a really good analysis. Actually, my own research is not on Britain per se at all. I've got my PhD manuscript that I need to pursue publication of (I had interest from a university press but I need to follow up) and I was starting to think about a new project to do with ~~a bunch of weirdly esoteric stuff orz~~ the cultural politics of crowdfunding.]

Honestly, Aurus thought that Hank was being unduly worried over the whole idea. "How in the world do you think this could hurt him?" Plainly, to the sylvari there was nothing here to be so concerned about.

"There's no danger to him in it. Even the mechanism is fairly straightforward: as I sleep, he reaches into my mind. My connection to the Dream becomes like a channel. When I wake, that channel closes. It's merely a matter of using the mind instead of the body to visit a new location."

At the moment, it hadn't occurred to Aurus to mention a thing about the drugs. Charles had declined them anyway, so it would only be Aurus using them himself, and since he had no idea that Charles had any history of drug addiction, the potential for something like a "contact high" didn't strike him as a matter for great concern.

[Oooh. I might have to read this e-book because I hate not knowing about something that's such a huge topic right now. I've heard reasons about why it passed, and I get the feeling you could look at Brexit and Trump's election and find a lot of common ground on the reasons why, but I'm curious on a better perspective. Now I'm curious - what do you mean by the culturual politics of crowdfunding?]

"Of course there is!" Hank actually looked shocked that Aurus was taking it so lightly. "You're talking about a man of incredible power and ability reaching out and contacting an unknown, alien hive mind far bigger than himself. He has to process all of that, a connection, a flow, an existence he has no complete concept of that is like nothing we have on Earth, and you're thinking there might not be any risk at all? What if he makes this connection and your waking doesn't stop it? What if he loses himself to it? I know you're new to this, but if there should be a backlash, he could very well affect every mind from here to the city without even realizing it!"

Maybe a touch over board, but he knew how Charles reacted to Cerebro, that absolutely terrifying moment of complete overwhelming, screaming, and needing to break out of it immediately - and that was with people watching over him.

[You're completely right about the common ground between Brexit and Trump. The morning after the US election we talked about this in my class: there are some really striking discursive lines running from the 2008 financial crisis through the Occupy movement and to the right-wing populism of 2016. And you can find that common ground in the sentimental rallying cries of "Make America great again" and "Take back control," both of which hearken nostalgically to some mythical, mystical time when both capitalism and the political establishment which is now its prop were unified, reliable, whole.
Actually, all this is (in a way) related to what I mean by the cultural politics of crowdfunding--I'm interested in the transformations in neoliberal subjectivity that allow global capital to extend and reproduce itself by colonizing even the terrain of its own crisis, its own ruptures. Crowdfunding is a recent innovation that allows people to try and solve lived problems of scarcity on a deeply individual level (while at the same time creating a new market for the apps that facilitate them doing so). That's a political, as well as economic and cultural, innovation. LOL aren't you glad you asked. /tl;dr jargon]

Aurus couldn't help it: he laughed. Only for a moment and he caught himself right after, but regardless.

"I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be flippant. It always strikes me as rather funny when humans use the word hive mind to describe the Dream and our connection to it. You're not the first to do so believe me. It's really not like that, you must understand.

"The Dream does not in any way control us. Even the shared cultural beliefs that we learn of through it must be studied after awakening, and each sylvari comes to understand them differently. Some have even rejected them. It shows us each different things, as different as the things humans dream of, as well as giving us common ground.

"Your satellites send pictures and stories all over your world, from what Charles has told me. And yet you find no threat in the idea that someone in another land might know the same story as you, do you?"

Despite all of what he was saying, Aurus was not intending to dismiss Hank's concerns out of hand though. There were things that the man was raising that he truly hadn't considered and that even now seemed quite extreme possibilities.

"I find it hard to imagine how my waking wouldn't break the connection. Just as I find it hard to imagine Charles losing himself to it. But perhaps there's something you know about his powers that I do not. I would merely say that thus far he's done perfectly well meeting the dragon Glint and visiting her lair. If anything he was more...reserved, more restrained, than I felt he needed to be."

He considered this for a moment, then sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I do not like asking you about this, I'll admit. It feels... It feels as though I don't trust him, and I do. I'm a fairly good judge of character, and I trust him."

[I *am* glad I asked, actually. I like learning and it's obvious how interested you are in the topic. I like hearing people speak about topics they're passionate about. As someone who lived in the most rural parts of PA and in the big cities, I find it absolutely fascinating to see what happened during the election. I could talk about this for a long time honestly but talking politics always scares me a little bit because people get batshit insane about it. I generally stay quiet and sigh a little.]

"It's a group of connected minds. A hive mind. It doesn't have to control you to still be just that. Something significantly larger than yourselves, on a mental plane. The mental plane he has to walk every time he dives into someone's mind." He sucked on his lower lip, briefly hesitating.

"I trust Charles. With my life. I have practically since the day we first met. This isn't sharing news with someone from another land. This is physically and mentally involving, with the potential for things to occur outside of the spectrum any of us are used to it happening on. I want you both to actually think this through instead of plunging into it." He leaned back in his chair a little, but his shoulders were hunched, expression unhappy.

"You're both adults, and I can't stop you, either of you, from doing what you want, but I can hope you think the possible dangers through." He gave Aurus a look, a long one, before he looked away. This was more confrontational than he liked to be and it felt like the more aggressive pieces of him wanted to have a bigger say in the matter. He didn't want to see Charles hurt again; the man had already lived through too much.

[The truth about academics: we are all completely fixated, obsessive people who are super invested in our topics and can talk about them ad nauseum if given half the chance. This is how we manage to research a thing for 3+ years and then write a book on it. I hear you on politics though--I tend to keep my own counsel when it comes up casually. People don't tend to challenge the "common sense" framing of the issues/debates and that drives me up several walls all at once. Also, /sits on hands because of all the GW2 spoilers. The newest chapter of Living World season 3 came out last night and kalsdhjfaksd. This thread is set a fair while in the past for Aurus--there's so much that's coming that he doesn't yet know about.]

Aurus's answer was patient but he held his position firm:

"The experience is one that for you is totally foreign. But for me it is as familiar as sleep itself. For Charles? As you say, he walks the mental plane every time he enters someone's mind--clearly he's not unpracticed in the use of his own powers. Even if he might sometimes avoid his personal demons rather than confront them, he surely knows his abilities better than anyone.

"You fear him being overwhelmed, but who's to say that he won't instead find an affinity and comfort among my people, precisely because this touch of the mind is something we all share in common?

"Regardless, I've not proposed this as something for him to do alone. I am going to be there throughout so he will never be without a guide. Perhaps the question comes down to whether or not you trust me, and I am aware that you have little to base that sort of trust on right now."

He did not simply want to leave the matter there, though. He did not like seeing Hank look so deeply troubled, especially not by something he believed to be hopeful, full of promise.

"How can I reassure you? My homeland is a beautiful place. And the Dream is not the vast chaotic flood that you seem to imagine. The Mother Tree does not want to see the minds of her children any more overwhelmed than you or I want to see it happen to Charles. Even if the worst things you imagine were to come to pass--and I do not believe they would--the Dream is not Nightmare and Charles would not be abandoned or lost alone."

Aurus's expression was wholly sincere as he said these things. At least he wanted Hank to know that this was not a thoughtless undertaking.

But for all his sincerity, there were things that Aurus did not yet know--things that virtually no sylvari, nor anyone else in his whole world yet knew--about his people and where they really came from. Even within the Dream, Charles would probably not come to know them either, not unless he went digging at least. If Aurus had known, though, he would not in good faith have been able to say the things to Hank that he was saying now.

[Nothing wrong with that about academics - my partner is one! ^_^ I love listening to her talk about her area of focus even if I understand only 20% of it. And oh man... Aurus, one day man, you'll learn.]

"I don't think you can reassure me," Hank said quietly, his hands folding together and the clenched fist falling between his knees. "I can't see what you and Charles do and frankly, I appreciate staying in here alone." His smile was mirthless as he tapped his own temple, then his hands returned to where they had been. "But all I can tell you is this side of things. The pain I've seen him go through when he's tackled something too big for himself, even when controls were put in place to try and protect him."

He let his eyes close, his lips thinning. Aurus had no idea of certain things, about the reasons why he was so protective over his friend. Those years when they had been completely alone up here, and even between each other, there was a certain loneliness. Even now, sometimes he felt still alone, but Charles didn't allow anyone around his age any closer to him. The idea of something major happening to his friend scared him. (Little did he know what would happen only a year or so from now...)

"If you-" he stopped, gave a quiet laugh, "when you go to do this, because I can tell you will... just be aware of it. If you need me, I'll be awake. I can't imagine I'm going to sleep tonight." The tone was a dismissal; right now, he needed to think and not have this stranger working his way into the most personal areas of their lives.

[ORLY! See it's no wonder you're a cool person! Academics' family members have this way about them. It's literally work and life sustaining--like there's this huge pool of too-often-unacknowledged emotional labor that people in our families do which makes academic "being" possible to begin with. The emotional stress I know I sometimes put on my partner when I was doing my PhD...and he was always so fabulous. And yeaaaah, Aurus will learn. Actually, depending on where this thread takes us, Charles might start to learn too because we should be right on the cusp of the first big !!!! reveal timing-wise.]

For a moment Aurus was quiet, watching Hank with a furrow of concern in his brow. He knew he had troubled him greatly, and not only had he never wished to do so, he also seemed powerless to ease the man's worry.

He also knew that there had to be more behind Hank's fears than what he was saying. There had to be some piece of the puzzle missing, something that would make the reaction more proportionate. He genuinely did not want Hank to tell him the secrets of Charles' past though. That just felt wrong. If he was going to know, he would need to learn it from Charles, and that felt very delicate indeed.

"I promise you that I take this all seriously, Hank. I'd perhaps had some sense of the weight of it before, but with what you've told me I do appreciate it more now. I promise that if he chooses to walk this path with me--the Dream, the intimacy, any part of it--I will see him through it safely, with his feeling whole. And yes, I will call on you if there's ever a need.

"I don't want you to think that the upset I've caused you is inconsequential to me though. I've not endeared myself to you, clearly." That was an understatement, to be sure.

"I'd like to try and do something about that if I may--something that might at least ease your worry for the moment. Will you come see what I've been planning to show the students, my little self-introduction to them?"

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