bakerstreet | thursday pic prompt

thursday pic prompt

the picture prompt meme

i. COMMENT WITH CHARACTER
ii. OTHERS LEAVE A PICTURE (OR TWO OR THREE....)
iii. REPLY TO THEM WITH A SETTING BASED ON THE IMAGES.

THIS POST WILL BE IMAGE HEAVY.

link to an image:

embed an image in your reply:

control width and height:

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

[I guess one thought that comes to mind is it might be better to be here and established before he starts in PhD instead of having to make ALL of the drastic changes at once, ya know? I mean obviously it's not my life, but it's what comes into my life.]

"They did," Charles said with that same attempted casualness even if inside it wasn't what he felt. Instead, he still felt that tightness in his stomach from nerves both good and bad, and when he looked into Aurus' eyes, it only made both forms of tightness worse. It wasn't something he was going to turn away from, but it felt like he was putting his toes closer and closer to the edge of that cliff. Yet his eyes strayed, studying with the natural curiosity of someone able to view more of such an alien figure along with the interest of someone wanting to know what they potentially could be dealing with this evening.

The question came not with any particular surprise and it was one that brought out a bit of a smirk to Charles lips. "I used to, when I was younger and needed more practice with my shielding. However, it's... been quite a while since I last did." A brow raised, curious of course to the reason behind the question. "Why?"

Several questions buzzed at the back of his head, and with great effort, he was working to keep the questions relevant to the moment instead of the great storm of questions that threatened to overwhelm and push him away. Taking this one step at a time. Aurus had mentioned needing... a more organic assistance in reaching the Dream, and thus it left Charles wondering if the sylvari had already partook or if it would come. He had agreed with himself to reject any offer in aiding himself, afraid of what he would find within. It would be all too easy to find himself falling on old habits he wanted dead and buried.

[Trouble is that we don't yet know what part of the country his PhD will land him in--could be California, Minnesota, Arizona, someplace else--there are several possibilities, so it's not like we can settle in advance anyway. Realistically, we'd be moving knowing that we'll move again in a year. My folks want us to be near them, but they're in rural GA which is not where we want to be.]

"I'm a great believer in it," Aurus said, sitting down for a moment on the edge of the bed. He did not add and I can see how your mind is racing, at least not aloud, but perhaps he didn't need to.

He leaned forward, resting his elbows against his knees and motioned for Charles to come closer to him. "Have you meditated on objects--on a flower or a leaf? Obviously for me that's a rather existential sort of thing, as much a question of my race's existence as it is a contemplation of the object itself. It's astonishing not just that we exist at all, but that we look the way we do, that our bodies have managed to copy your own using material that is so unlike flesh and blood.

"Look at my brow, the way the leaves come together here to form a ridge--it's like yours but also wholly unlike it." He reached out to take Charles' hand to guide it towards his face, inviting him to feel the way the leaves lay, the edges and the contours of them. It was a way of beginning to answer questions that he knew must be in the man's mind, and also of starting to break down a social barrier of propriety and formality, to bring them into physical contact without it being anything too overtly sexual in its charge.

It was clear to Aurus that words alone were not going to be enough to let them move forward together. That required touch as well. Hopefully this wouldn't be too overwhelming a step, even if it felt shockingly forward at first.

[Holy bleep I would not want to live in rural GA, specially given you and your partner. south tends to be so much worse for people like us. @_@]

Charles initial reaction was defensive, that faint jerk away from the sudden reaching hand coming towards him, but it was clearly an unconscious one. It was very forward, and while Aurus did bring Charles' hand up to his brow, the professor didn't immediately touch. Instead, his eyes looked more closely first, but eventually his fingertips did caress lightly over that brow ridge, feeling the completely alien texture of 'skin' that was very much plant-like. The tiny ridges, the elegant lay and color of that skin that was uniquely Aurus', at least in this world.

His fingers traveled along the ridge cutting across Aurus' cheek, then briefly along the strong jaw before he let his hand fall back to his lap. "Whoever dreamed your people into existence... they clearly had the belief of people like us," touching his own chest, "in their minds when they slept. Yet nature provided them with the material, their dreams created and built. It's fascinating to see something so relatively new to the world, even if it isn't mine. Our species... is so long here in the span of a human mind, but only a blink on our planet."

[Tell me about it. Ugh. Of all the places for them to retire to. /headshake I personally don't really like Atlanta either. New Orleans might be an option though...or Nashville? At least we'd be in the same region. My dad's health isn't great. He had two lung collapses fairly recently, so there are reasons not to be an ocean away.]

That initial reflex was precisely, Aurus thought, what they needed to get beyond. For a moment, he hadn't been sure whether Charles would truly pull away leaving the contact uncompleted. But the gaze was like a gateway: small steps, steadily closer. When he finally felt the brush of Charles' fingertips, he let his eyes slide closed, inclining his head gently towards the contact--a tacit permission for the touch to be extended or reestablished if the man wanted it. Though it was brief, it was also unmistakably significant, and he didn't want to rush it, opening his eyes again slowly as Charles spoke.

There was a deep irony to what he was saying, but it was an irony that Aurus could not yet appreciate: a hidden truth behind just who--or indeed what--had dreamed the sylvari into being. As far as Aurus or anyone else now knew, it was the Pale Tree itself that had drawn inspiration from the human form with no other architect directing its plan. The reality was something quite different, but that reality was still shrouded and secret.

"Your words resonate with what you will see in the Dream," Aurus confirmed, "with the shaping of the Grove itself, which you must remember began only when the Firstborn awoke. You have seen how I can affect the growth of other plants, but compared to those who have dedicated their lives to refining the art, my skills are rudimentary. The Grove is a city, but I am confident in saying that it will be like no city you've ever seen. Thirty years ago the place where the Pale Tree grows was wild jungle.

"Shall I describe some of what you should expect?"

[New Orleans would be a neat place to live! Maybe Atlanta...? I guess it's going to be a mix of where your partner can take his PhD and close enough to your father. That's so scary. :(]

Did he want to know ahead of time? Would words even truly explain what he was going to see? Charles laspsed into silence, truly thinking over that question, before he hesitantly answered. "I... would like to know if there's anything that might be particularly dangerous or overwhelming - basically, any warnings I should know about, but otherwise, no. I'm not certain that even if we sat here the whole night you'd be able to explain everything I'm going to see." His hands folded in his lap, refusing to let himself show any other signs of nerves.

"Equally... is there any potential chance that your mind would touch the mind of another?" And therefore, his mind would do the same. It was a mixture of self-protection and morals; this potential 'other' hadn't agreed to his mental invasion. These were the risks to himself and in turn, the possibility of the same to the mind he would be so deeply attached to at the time. It was also the gentle reminder that there would be some possible issues along side of this, risks, and while he personally planned to be as safe as possible, Aurus was his guide. Some of the same riskes applied in return.

[I'm not too keen on Atlanta personally, just never really liked the vibe there. I spent today looking at Memphis, mostly because it's supposed to have one of the lowest costs of living in the US. But neither of us has ever even been there, soooo you can see how clear as mud our plans are.]

"No to the second," Aurus answered easily, "not, at least, unless you reach out to the minds of those around us. Whether in the Dream or in wakefulness, myself and my kin have no telepathic abilities like your own. As for the Pale Tree itself, we meet the avatar of the Mother only after we awaken, not in the Dream itself.

"Inside the Dream you will see some figures that appear translucent and others that appear solid as we will appear to each other. The translucent are growing saplings who have not yet awoken. They may speak to us, but there is no obligation to reply. They won't expect it, particularly not of you, and anything you say could have deep reverberations for them.

"The non-sylvari one sees in the Dream appear because someone else has seen them and remembers them there. Their words and actions are like loops on repeat. You will be different, but unless you chose to make that known, few if anyone will spot it." He was hoping that all of this would put Charles' mind at least somewhat at ease.

Would it, hypothetically, be possible for Charles to somehow touch the "mind" of the Tree itself? Perhaps. But Aurus felt confident that the man would have to actively try. It wasn't, he felt sure, something he could accidentally stumble into.

[Yeaaaah. I'd be kind of terrified to live somewhere I've never been before. I live just outside of Philly and couldn't imagine living anywhere else. (Though less than happy with how my state voted recently >.<) Also sorry if I'm a bit slower. I can't do sexy-ish tags as easily during work times. ^^;]

Charles couldn't help the thought that came to him in that moment. Could he touch the Pale Tree or this avatar? A world that was not his own, a power he had no true concept of, something that almost sounded like a god... it fascinated him, more than he was willing to admit to himself, but he also realized well and true that it could be dangerous to even try to do so.

"Will there be sylvari that reject the idea of my being there, if I'm spotted?" Charles asked, pushing those other thoughts out of his head for now, all while making a particular note to not say a word to any of the translucent unborn children. The last thing he wanted to do was somehow change an entire generation of sylvari because of words he said to them before they even left their plant-womb. There was something disturbing about the idea of being god to something else.

He looked over to the bed and decided, for now, he was going to make himself comfortable. So he brought his chair right up to it, locked the brakes, and pulled himself up and out with a brief show of upper body strength. It wasn't graceful, but he managed fairly well even on the unusual bed, working himself back until his back was to the pillows.

[I've never done it before tbh. I moved from NY to Tucson when I'd only ever been there once or twice before to visit, and with two horses no less (but I was younger and more fearless then). And when I moved to the UK it was to Torquay where my partner grew up and I'd only passed through for like a day. This feels different though. (Of course it might not come to fruition at all, still brainstorming.) No worries on tagging speed of course--'s all worth waiting for! <3]

"Oh no, I wouldn't think so. More than likely they'll just be curious. We are as diverse in our personal opinions as humans are though, and some have thornier dispositions than others. I won't completely rule out the possibility of someone being discontent with me, but not in any consequential--"

He paused before he got to the end of the sentence, watching Charles with obvious interest and momentary distraction. Actually, his mouth hung slightly open until he recomposed himself, shaking his head and giving a low laugh at his own presumptuousness. "I'm sorry. I'd planned to offer to help you--obviously you don't require my help at all."

In truth, he also hadn't wanted to be too forward or to rush Charles ahead, and he'd worried that the man might balk at the suggestion of moving from chair to bed. Evidently he'd been wrong about that too, and he was honestly glad to be wrong.

[I didn't know you used to have horses! I miss horses so badly sometimes.. I rode for years at the stables of a friend of my mother's, but I got bucked off into a wall and broke my tailbone about 6 months before college started and that kind of ended that. :( I still think you're a braver soul than I. I couldn't do it. I think I'm too logical/pessimestic/rational/I don't know to just up end myself to unknown places. I think you guys are strong enough to do it, though.]

It wasn't until the laugh that Charles caught Aurus staring at him, then raised an eyebrow as he pondered the reasons for that laugh until the explanation came, then a faint smile touched his lips. It was something he was partially used to, people thinking they needed to help, but he forgave Aurus as the other barely knew him well enough to know how mobile he managed to be. "The general consensus is if I need help, I will ask for it. Otherwise, I try to manage on my own." Hank had been the one to buy him weights, though, and a system to try and work on his upper body strength when the wheelchair was clearly going to remain a part of his life. The gift had brought up a deep anger and self-pity at first, but eventually he had brought them out of the closet and started working with them. Just... enough to help himself.

But for now, he was still hoping his courage would hold out. With no true idea of what was going to come of tonight, mentally or physically, it was running along a dark path and hoping it led to where he wanted to go... or at least some place that wasn't dangerous at the end. "I hope they won't be discontent with either of us. I wouldn't be remiss if you chose to fabricate how you and I came to travel in the Dream. Perhaps I found my own way and you chose to guide me," he offered, shifting a pillow behind him until he was content with its placement.

[Oh no! Tailbone breaks are literally the worst! I've known several people it's happened to--so damn painful. My current relationship to horses is...a bit messy, in the paying upkeep costs for animals I don't see sense. Alas. Re: crazy moves to new places--it might be in my blood lol. When my dad immigrated to the US in the 50s he literally took a plane to NYC from half way around the world and asked a taxi driver to take him to someplace he could sleep. That still sounds totally nuts to me, but the world was a very different place back then.]

Aurus gave a single deep nod of his head to indicate that he would indeed respect this instruction and take the guidance on board. When it came right down to it, he had no idea how Charles managed all the myriad mundane tasks of life, but it made sense to him that any person in his situation would want to maintain their self-sufficiency.

Of course he could now make some kind of glib remark about how he'd just have to wait for another excuse to get the man in his arms. But it did not feel well-judged to say--more likely awkward or uncomfortable than anything.

So instead he shifted his own position on the bed, drawing his legs up so that he could sit cross-legged beside the man while to two of them talked. (Since his feet were bare, the posture also had the effect of revealing that his soles glowed like foxfire as well, as though he'd walked through bioluminescent paint.)

"Ahh," he said with a shake of his head at Charles suggestion of how they might avoid any potential blame, "Now that would raise quite a lot of eyebrows. No human in the world can find a way into the Dream on their own. That would be alarming.

"The Dream is not impervious to attack, you see. Humans as a whole bear us no ill will, but one of the things that keeps the Dream safe is that only the Mother Tree herself can create a way for members of the other races to enter it directly. That fact might not provide perfect security, but it does assure that the only threat we need guard against is presented by those of our own race who would seek to poison the Dream.

"The idea of a non-sylvari having simply found their own way in--it would too easily suggest a war fought on multiple fronts. Because if you could manage it who is to say that someone who meant us harm would not soon do the same?"

[Oh no! :( I'd be heartbroken if I couldn't see my babies. Also your dad sounds pretty badass. That whole idea is both kind of romantic in one sense and completely terrifying in another. I'm very much the 'make my own path, but I build it carefully' sort. Happy to try a random restaurant or spin the wheel, but when it comes to my career, home, etc... I work hard to keep it on a path I feel is secure. Probably comes from a ton of having to move place to place in my life and never really having a home for long.]

Ahhh. Charles nodded, showing that he understood. "I see what you mean." And how it could be very much a threat. "Unfortunately, that sounds like if someone becomes perturbed with you or I, you'll have to bear a bit of that blame." The corner of his mouth lifted, showing he didn't mean it as a cruel statement but something that wasn't exactly avoidable. In the low light of the room, Aurus had this beautiful unearthly glow about him, striking him even more strongly how much he looked like nothing he had seen on earth except for Raven and-

He suddenly had a thought, one that made him realize there was something he should have done a while ago. "You know, there's someone you should meet tomorrow," he said suddenly, peering at Aurus for several moments with a critical eye. "One of our students is a bit..." Oh how he struggled with the next word. "Shy might be how some think of it, but ashamed might be a lot more on the right level. With Raven gone," those words hurt so deeply still to say, how he missed her, "we don't have anyone who looks a bit more... unusual. Stacy came to us only a few weeks ago and perhaps you might do well to bring her out of her shell."

There was a part of him who realized how foolish it was that he hadn't thought of this connection sooner. Sometimes he believed it was an irony or a punishment that he had no one among his staff who could work with the students that had a unique appearance - given his comments to his sister in the past.

[Ahahahaha my computer has broken. Like proper broken. Fan made a weird sound and shut it down and now it won't restart. I already had an appointment at Apple to have it looked at on Monday but fuuuuck. At least tagging is something I can reasonably do on my ipad or my partner's notebook. /sigh]

Given that he really wasn't worried about getting into trouble with his kin for what they were about to do, Aurus could freely and easily return that smile. "It won't be the most trouble I've ever been in, regardless," he assured.

The way that Charles looked at him then made Aurus half expect that another question would follow. His own expression thus grew more curious as the man spoke about this student, and about his sister. Aurus, of course, had seen the picture of Raven in Charles' office earlier in the day, but she'd looked like a perfectly ordinary human there. A pretty, blond haired young woman with no telltale sign of mutation. Granted, the picture was also several years old. Could something have happened in the time since?

"Of course, I would be happy to," he said of Stacy. "However I can most be of use, I'm glad to do it. But I don't understand--Raven, your sister? Does her mutation alter her appearance? From her photograph I would never have known."

[Welcome to being on the only tag I've been doing all day. @_@ Today was ... shitty. I had to go get my injections for my TMJ and my body just kind of shut down on me from it. Ug. However, broken computer is WAY worse... crap! And WOW Apples usually don't do that! I've had my Apple for 10+ years now without issue. I hope it can get fixed!]

Ah, right. He hadn't explained about Raven. Charles couldn't help the small chuckle that left him, bringing up an arm and tucking it behind his head, making himself comfortable. "Raven is a shapeshifter," he said simply, hoping it might be a simple enough term it would come through to Aurus if they had anything similar or not. "She can change her appearance at will. The photograph you saw was the form she took as my sister and remained as such for the majority of her life, but in truth she is.." He paused, thinking how to describe her true form. "Blue, head .to toe, with bright crimson hair and raised darker blue markings on her skin. It actually made me wonder if I had found another one like her when you first showed up."

But his smile turned just a hint sad after his words ended, his gaze turning away. There as something in there that he hadn't mentioned, but it most certainly seemed to have to do with his sister. "She would love to have met you, if she was here."

[D: I hope that you were able to take the rest of the day off/have a lie down to recoup. And that the injection actually helps in the longer run. (I didn't know that they did injections for TMJ actually.) Chronic pain fucking blows. I'm shocked on the Apple front too--all my past ones have lived for 10+ years and been fine as well. Honestly...I think GW2 is to blame. Don't think the machine dealt well with the demands of gaming.]

"How amazing," Aurus said, his head cocked slightly in fascination and his voice slightly softened. "I would never have imagined." And in truth he couldn't imagine. Not really. A sylvari with the colors that Charles described, yes, that he could picture. But a human? And just what precisely did being a shapeshifter entail? Was it only humans that she could become, or could she take the shape of other sorts of beings as well--or was even that question the sort that was barely suggested within a world where there were no other sentient races? If a shapeshifter such as this woman came to his own world, would she be able to take the shape of a tengu, for example--a humanoid bird more than six feet tall?

The cascade of questions flowed through Aurus's mind and if he'd been a younger sylvari he probably would have given them voice. His focus, however, was better than that, and what he said instead was "Perhaps I might have a chance to do so yet. You said she's out in the world searching for herself. Who knows when she may come back." Unlikely, perhaps, but Aurus was thinking that he'd quite like to meet Raven too, and he could always hope.

"But what of this student of yours, Stacy--is she a shapeshifter as well?"

[I pretty much just relaxed the rest of the day. Not sure why in particular my body sort of just... shut down but it reacted a lot worse than it normally does to the injections. 22 of them this time... ug. I'm on my third year now of getting them and it's literally changed my life. Before I found Dr. G, I spent 7 years trying to get relief. My jaw couldn't open very far any more, my left jaw socket clicked horribly (400-500 times a day and it even locked in place 3 times), and it was agony. I cried sometimes from how much it just... hurt to do the normal stuff you do every day. Smile, talk, eat. The botox makes it so the nerves stop firing into the muscle so much and it gives your muscles a chance to stop constantly being tense and flexing and angry. Even the shape of my face has changed. ...Er, sorry. It's a subject I could talk for an hour about. Doctors who didn't believe me, did believe me but couldn't help, all the shit we tried to make it better, the damage already done.. @_@ I dunno though I don't think GW2 really would kill an Apple. It sounds like maybe just a fluke? I guess it depends on what Apple says is actually the problem.]

Charles would have answered those questions, to the best of his ability, if Aurus had spoke up on them, but instead he stuck to the question he did before he spoke about Raven. "Stacy is not," he started off, but it was tricky explaining to people just what her gift was without it coming off... improperly. "Stacy is capable of producing pheromones that affect humans in different ways. So far, we've witnessed her capable of making people happy or angry or ill." But he feared one day that the 'happy' would turn into something more, in particular as the child became a woman.

"Raven's chosen to.. explore the world. I'm not sure when she'll return." Yet something in his voice suggested he wasn't sure she would ever return, that note of sadness and the shift in his gaze that spoke even more volumes than his words. He missed her, so much more than he even let himself feel.

The idea that she didn't miss him at all was a barb in his heart, even if he had no idea if it was true or not.

[My dressage trainer years ago had TMJ--the aftermath of a bad car accident (she was thrown through the windshield), and it plagued her something awful. She'd have days when she just couldn't get out of bed and no conventional medicine helped her. She relied a lot on sports massage, but was a very imperfect cure. So the injections you're talking about--even if your body just nopes out every now and then, if they give you your life back that's srsly invaluable. On my end, I've spend all day today and half of yesterday trying to find a good cheap(ish) gaming laptop option. The reason I think GW2 is to blame is because so many hours of extra hot running temps which had the fans working severely overtime and wearing out. Gaming laptops are just built with more heat dispersal in mind than a macbook. I think I'm paying the price for that, but we'll see what the techies say tomorrow.]

"Huh. I wonder what effect human pheromones have on plants," he mused aloud, "if they have any at all." It was a topic close enough to his own interest in the mind-altering effects of plant preparations that he was genuinely fascinated to find out.

"Does she have control of her ability?" Obviously, Aurus was taking to the idea of meeting this student already, and not in the least put off by the possibility that the girl's powers could somehow emotionally manipulate him.

As for Raven, though, he reached out and touched Charles' hand, sensing something of what troubled him and laying his own palm atop the man's. "Trust that you will see her again. Just as, even after so many years away, I return to my own home either to visit in the Dream or someday to go back in person. Wandering long and far does not mean that one does not love their home nor miss the people there."

[My TMJ is hereditary, but I didn't even know you could get it from an accident so you taught me something today. I did a lot of massage in the past as well to try and help but it doesn't really solve anything unfortunately. My doctor told me this - imagine if you go to the gym three times a week, worked out, your muscles would be happy and healthy. Now imagine if you never left the gym, ever, stayed 24/7 and worked out. eventually your muscles wouldn't just hurt, they'd get so over developed that they would start to break down. That's what really bad TMJ does. I couldn't be happier that I found the botox treatment. Gave me back so much. Mmm... yeah I suppose I don't really think of gaming when I think Macs. XD Poor thing. I hope it's something fixable. I'd say cheap but nothing with a Macbook is cheap. /as she types on one herself. I leave my gaming to my desktop I built.]

"I'm not certain," Charles said with a look and tone that suggested he wanted to take caution with this, don't just jump in there Aurus, but he softened it with a, "I'd be grateful if you could talk to her, maybe try to ease her on her unhappiness about her body. She does have control over her powers, for the most part, but sometimes when she gets very emotional they can work a bit on their own. Something we see in a lot of these children."

He offered a small smile, but the smile actually fell away with the touch to his hand. There was a great deal in this particular (tender) subject that Aurus didn't know about, what led to her leaving and the pain that came with it (being deserted when he needed her most, her choice of Erik over himself, just leaving all together).

"Maybe." His word was a stop. His voice indicated it wasn't a subject he wanted to discuss further, definitely not now.

[I actually didn't know it could be hereditary, so I learned something too! I've always thought of it as one of those things that's just so poorly understood by the medical establishment. But your doctor's metaphor both makes sense and is kind of horrifying to picture. It's amazing what botox can sometimes help with though, like they're using it to treat migraines now too? Who would have thought it when they started to use it to treat wrinkles! Also, I kind of wish I had space to put a desktop for gaming, but alas we are laptop people in a crazy small London flat. My partner has a super shiny MSI gaming laptop, but I can't afford something that high end.]

The nod that Aurus gave acknowledged both that he would do as Charles asked and take care in his conversation with this student, and also that he would respect the boundary being drawn around the topic of the man's sister. It was, however, a reminder of how much he still had yet to learn about the man. He knew some elements of Charles' past, but at the same time it was clear that the ghosts which haunted him had many tales yet to tell and that Charles guarded those closely.

Would the man open up to him more after tonight? Aurus hoped that he would, but he could also accept that it might take a much longer time.

He let his hand slip away. "You have my word that I will be as sensitive and careful as I am able," with Charles' student, with Charles himself.

Then, feeling that perhaps this was the moment when they ought to broach the core topic of the evening, he gave a nod to the cup on the table--really a shallow wooden bowl which Aurus kept with him for precisely this purpose. "What do you think, shall I drink and have us begin?"

[My grandmother developed it late in life, so we're going to watch my mom to see if it happens with her, too. My jaw is all sorts of messed up to begin with. The lower jaw is too small. I have no canine teeth at all because all four adult ones had to be pulled to make enough room for the rest of my teeth. /random fun fact. I've heard about the migraine thing! It's so incredible that it's being found to do so many things other than wrinkles. (Though it scares me people want to get stabbed with needles to help with something as stupid as wrinkles >.<) Ahhh no I could see that. Desktops do take up a bunch of room. And hell I couldn't afford a proper 'gaming' laptop, so I feel you!]

"Thank you." Whether Charles picked up the additional on Aurus' promise or not it was impossible to say, but the thanks worked in either way.

His eyes slid over to the bowl, studying the mixture soaking it in, and felt a small amount of relief he didn't feel any particular urge towards drinking it himself, more a decided anxiety. Then again, the logical part of him said, it couldn't provide him the thing he wanted again in his life. Not much of a test, but still one that came with a tiny bit of relief to have passed.

There was a quick nod, covering his own internal thoughts. "How long will it take you to be affected?" He asked curiously but at the same time, he had to figure out how much time he had for what would need to come after that drink. "I need to be able to keep in contact with your head while we do this, so if I put my back against the far edge, you can lay with your head in my lap. It'll be the easiest for such a long stretch of time." Not actually meant to push in any particular direction but simply a fact of what needed to happen. From everything he'd seen so far, though, he wasn't so concerned that Aurus might have an issue with such positioning.

[So the verdict from the (possibly gay, possibly flirting, completely adorable) Apple tech guy was that...my d key isn't working! Surprise surprise. The computer booted right up though, so that issue just resolved itself which is good. He said he suspected that the weird boot screen came from a keyboard issue that made the computer think a key was being held down when it wasn't. Anyway, long story short, it would cost £400 to replace the keyboard, so not doing that. I'll just get an external keyboard to plug in instead. But he did agree that the d has gone due to stress/fatigue from gaming use, and over time the excess heat will shorten the life of the machine. I think he was thrilled in that geeky sort of way when I mentioned the idea of using an external GPU to take half the heat out of the body of the laptop and into a separate unit, but unfortunately my laptop has a Thunderbolt2 port and an eGPU requires Thunderbolt3 to be viable. Anyway, tl;dr, I need to make this my professional life computer and invest in a separate machine for gaming. LMAO I cannot believe I'm actually going to spend this kind of money to play this bloody MMO. /shakes fist at GW2]

"Actually," Aurus said, unable to suppress his smile, "I was going to suggest precisely the same thing." He'd been wondering what Charles would say to the idea of having him put his head in his lap, but apparently he need not have worried, and the idea that they were already on the same page on this point seemed to him to confirm the rightness of what they were choosing to do.

"The brew takes effect gradually. It won't be long--a few minutes at most before it begins. In this case, it will help ease the way forward as I drop off to sleep, nothing more. Were I to stay awake, its effects could be quite different."

Of course Aurus still had no reason to suspect that the brew itself might be a source of anxiety for Charles. He would certainly have liked to know, but even if he had he could not have said much beyond assuring the man that hallucinogens of this sort were almost never addictive. (Some of his plant alkaloids actually had the side effect of curing addiction.) And indeed this admixture of boiled vines and leaves and bark could never give Charles the use of his legs, even temporarily...though it could perhaps allow him to hallucinate himself walking.

"The Mists are quite vast and from here in another world, the Grove and the Pale Tree are very far away. It may take a little time before anything comes into view. I don't know precisely how the connection between us will work, but I suspect that once it is made, if you feel yourself drifting towards sleep, you need not try to stay awake. If you feel a subtle kind of guidance you need merely to allow yourself to follow it."

Reaching over for the little bowl, he held it cupped between his hands with a kind of ritual reverence. The teas he drank out of it were never simply recreational. There was some spiritual significance each time, and this one was no different.

Half closing his eyes for a few seconds in something quite like a meditative pose, he focused on his breath, clearing his mind. Then he lifted the bowl to his lips and drank the liquid within.

[At least it sounded like a fun time even if the result of the trip was both somehow really good AND really bad? XD That is such a WEIRD issue! I've been working with computers my whole life and the idea of a key being held down stopping it is so very weird. Still, at least it isn't a worse issue! An external keyboard is a good stop-gap solution, though. (Uh, is it here that I admit I bought a whole new gaming desktop because my original desktop wasn't strong enough to play FFXIV? coughcough) >.>]

A brow briefly rose. Why would Aurus have suggested such a position without knowing what he required? Then again, the sylvari did know he required touch, so perhaps it made sense. Charles pushed it out of his mind, focusing on what was happening now. Good, at least he wouldn't have to fight too hard against the drug-tea that Aurus was about to consume (or he hoped he wouldn't). He shifted his weight back, getting himself into position, but he did pause mid-motion so that he could watch Aurus. It was fascinating to watch, seeing the respect that Aurus gave the moment, which put it into better perspective what Aurus thought of this venture into the Dream.

Keeping that in mind, he finished what he was doing, then took one of the other pillows and put it in his lap. It would keep Aurus' head steady and more comfortable and give his hands somewhere to rest while he disappeared into the other's mind. Much like Aurus' just had, once he was in place, he closed his eyes, slowing down his own breathing, working down the nerves he had coming into this situation. Without any idea of what he was truly getting into other than the bits Aurus had told him, even though he knew the sylvari had told him everything he could, he knew it would most likely be immeasurable and indescribable. Hank had tried to explain Cerebro to him before he put the helmet on. It wasn't nearly enough back then and he didn't imagine it would be now.

[We can shamefully whisper our admissions of gaming indulgence behind our hands. Because after an evening of searching I ordered myself a proper name brand shiny thing! It feels ridiculous--our living room is going to look like a damn rave from all the rainbow laptop lights. But what can I say, I was seduced by the awesome sale that I found. I am such a sucker for a good sale.]

Slowly, Aurus opened his eyes once more, his gaze settling on Charles, bright and clear and once again finding that expression of warmth and intimacy that he'd only been able to show fleetingly throughout the day. It had required careful discretion then, but there was no one else to see them now, and the only person who might judge them harshly was Charles himself.

He was sure that this would all still feel daunting for the man, the way that breaking (or at least stretching and bending) taboos always felt daunting, particularly at threshold moments when the act was just about to begin. Why, then, break taboos at all? It could only be because of desire, the pull towards an intimacy too captivating to ignore. With himself and Charles, Aurus felt that it was like the current of a river--sometimes it flowed low and hidden stirring the silt deep down, and sometimes it rose up in a visible rush that tugged and rippled right to the surface. Tonight it could touch the open air, as free and as heady as it wanted to be.

Aurus set the bowl back on the table and lay down, setting his head slowly against the cushion in Charles' lap, and looking up at him. Before he settled fully, he reached for the man's hand, seeking the press of fingertips against his own, an affirmation of the connection between them not on a telepathic level but simply on an emotional one.

[YAY! New laptops are so much fun to get in the mail. I'm super excited to get my custom leather boots after work today... >.> Speaking of paying a lot of money for your hobby, I won't admit how much I paid for these boots. XD Also why are computer lights so much fun!? When I got my new case I squealed because it was all blue lighting everywhere. NOTHING IS BETTER THAN A GOOD SALE. (Except maybe macaroons. They are the best.)]

Perhaps that river could come to the surface so easily for Aurus, but it was not so easy for Charles. It had been a long time now since he'd allowed himself any sort of intimate connection with another person, and even if that hadn't been stacked against him with all of the issues that hung over him conected to that choice, Aurus was not only male but a male of another species all together. He could see his younger self would have been very much into this, flirting back with a grin on his lips and a certain swag in his eyes, but this was an older Charles scarred by life and circumstance and more constrained by himself than even society would bind him.

The touch to his hand opened his eyes again, pulling him out of that meditative state he had started in to look at their fingers curling together. His hand shifted, just enough for a better grip, and gave Aurus' hand a gentle squeeze. "Are you ready?" he asked quietly, not wanting to disturb the atmosphere that was brewing in the air between them. Something like the air before a storm, the tension in the space all around them without being immediately threatening or wonderful but the waiting, anticipation, for the first drops to fall or the lightning to crack across the sky.

[I think custom leather boots are a damn good thing to get excited about! What are they like? Tell tell! (I haven't had macaroons in years, gosh.) Also, here is a song for Charles--sort of this thread in a nutshell lol. Aaaaand some visual reference for the Grove. Not sure ~~how mean you want to be~~ whether you want Charles to be able to walk while in the Dream, but it's certainly an option!]

One of the things that had been most important to Aurus for this undertaking was that it not feel like Charles was a mender tending to him in some sickbed. That had, in fact, been one of his own reasons for wanting the intimacy of resting his head in Charles' lap. But it was also an element in the touch of their hands, the expression in their eyes--none of this felt clinical or sterile, and to him that mattered very much.

With a smile and a nod of his head, Aurus let his eyes slide closed, returning the squeeze Charles gave his hand before letting his grip slide free and folding his palms lightly on his chest.

He allowed a meditative focus on his breath to slowly lead him down the path towards sleep, scanning his body as he did so that the spots of tension ebbed and he sank into the heaviness of relaxation.

At first, as he did this, his mind was clear and blank, like old slate rubbed clean and smoothed by use. And then slowly, out of the darkness, an impression of shapes and contours grew. Grays and blacks became muted shades of taupe and then blue, lines and planes that wove together in an intricately patterned web. The colors shifted, blue becoming darker, becoming indigo, becoming pink then red, yellow, green, as the fractal of patterns seemed to fall closer...or else they were zooming into it, falling ever downward into its center.

Only there was no center. There was, instead, a pattern of shapes that made up other shapes, each a component of the one that came before. They slid in along spirals, the eyes of which each revealed a thousand other spirals, and they sometimes seemed to angle off center so that they slid not into the eye of the spiral ahead but into one of its tiny side components, which each seemed to expand at their approach...unless each spiral had truly always been so big and they so small but merely not yet close enough to see it.

These fractals were, in no small part, produced by the tea Aurus had drunk--a way to visualize a path, to have the sense of closing distance. But they also represented something of the immensity of the multiverse, an experience of mortal finitude and relative smallness compared to the scope and scale of the unending. The feeling of movement through this surreal landscape might itself be overwhelming, especially since it would feel like quite a long time before they finally emerged through the base of a spiral that did not lead to yet another one.

Then, at last, there was a blackness that lightened slowly into gray, and now into mist with a growing tinge of green--of light and life and growing things. All still nondescript for now, as though the world was veiled in a thick fog, but the fog was slowly beginning to clear and they were no longer falling through space.

[I, uh, may have been listening to that Fear Not This Night song since the moment I received your tag in my inbox >.> Holy fuck is it incredible. I will trade you for my favorite song from an MMO including one of the most powerful Cutscenes I've ever seen. It's called "Answers" from FFXIV, which is a song in which the citizens of Eoreza are praying to the goddess Hydaline, and she responds to their prayers. To give a little bit of context, if you're unfamiliar, the beginning of this movie is the very end of the original FFXIV. The game was considered a massive failure and players who remained logged in to the last minute of the game first hear a very creepy, haunting version of this song playing, then got to see this cutscene (until you hear 'Answers' finish). Then the servers were taken off line. Literally the end of the world. Quite a while later, FFXIV: ARR (A Realm Reborn) was released as 2.0 to the game and that cutscene became the first thing you saw when you started the game. It's what inspired me to start playing. The remainder of this movie is what you find out, through a grueling series of 13 raids that were the hardest thing to do in the game at the time, happened after the original cutscene ended. Oh I could go on about it, but that's the summary. If you're interested, this is a video about the 'end of the world' when the servers came down, taken by a player at the time. When we see Charles meet his future self in canon, he walks, so I assume he imagines himself being able to walk in his mind. [I think in Apoc we see it too? When he's fighting Apoc in his mind?]]

It was worse than he might have imagined. Far worse.

This was nothing like he had ever seen in any mind, something far greater and far more expansive, and he was certain in that moment his idea of comparing this venture to Cerebro was not only true but possibly not strong enough. It was overwhelming, something that if he had been able, he might have screamed and gripped his head, but instead he was transfixed, frozen as he fell through with Aurus, unable to do anything but hang on and pray for the end of it even as he tried to encompass the majesty and vastness of it all.

All in all, it was only through his training with Cerebro that he didn't lose the connection completely, and even only just at that. So when relief finally came, it was gratefully received - grateful for his mind and his sanity. There was no physical attribute he could match to the feelings he held, but he could well imagine how his body would be reacting. Shivering, shaking, sweating, panting, racing heart, pale. Instead, his connection was faint, holding onto Aurus only through sheer determination. The growing clarity around them wasn't even something he was capable of dealing with right now as he got over what had just happened to them, mind racing and trying to hold onto fleeting images and sensations before they disappeared and at the same time, like any sort of fear-response, wanting to soften those same things to keep itself from devolving further.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject