bakerstreet

Oh. Probably. I'm in a bar now.

Odds of getting home without getting lost?

I'll get an uber

You're a much wiser drunk than you are, I just tend to get into fights.

If I did that I'd lose.

Unfortunately that's not something that's ever stopped drunk me. I become less tolerant of idiocy and people being wrong.

doesn't help that you think everyone is an idiot. and wrong.

Come on, have you ever listened to what people in bars talk about? Last time I got in an argument about minimum wage.

I try not to listen, it's a good way to avoid the stupid.

As I said, you're a lot wiser than drunk me. Drunk me wants to fight the world.

Are you saying that sober you doesn't?

Well.

Yes.

But he has better hand-to-eye coordination.

And hopefully better self-control.

I feel slightly less inclined to actually talk to people, so that helps with not needing to correct them.

why do you even go out like, ever?

I really don't know. I guess there's the vague hope that there's guys out there that don't turn me off once they open their mouths.

That's a pretty slim hope even for those of us who aren't judgmental geniuses.

Key is to find the right balance between being drunk enough not to care and finding someone hot enough to make not caring easier.

Don't make me lecture a genius about why drunk sex is a horrible idea.

Oh, I know. That's why drunk me never gets laid either. It's an awful deal all around.

Guess we need to set you up with some other genius.

They all tend to be manipulative assholes.

Speaking as a manipulative asshole.