bakerstreet | sexting/texting tuesday

That depends on the consequences the thief would experience for stealing them in the first place

In ancient times, depending on the culture, I'm pretty sure they'd lose a finger or hand. Suffice it to say, I think this thief doing everyone's laundry for the next month is punishment enough.

Unless I think of something way more severe.

Wow, the next MONTH? Poor fella

What if they took the shirts for a good reason, though? You gotta cut them some slack for that, right?

Punishment's got to fit the crime.

It'd have to be a really good reason, especially since this guy has been a bit of a problem aside from the shirts.

Ouch

They were going to say they missed you, but they're probably rethinking it right about now

...Oh. Well that's unfortunate. Would a lighter punishment keep them from changing their mind?

The fact you want them to change their mind is changing their mind

You like when someone misses you, captain Rogers?

I hope so. I kinda want them to tell me how much they missed me in person, better yet show it.

You know, I might like it more if they didn't take my stuff.

Then don't make your stuff so easy to take!

I do miss you, though. For what it's worth. I'd show you if you'd just come home to me

I don't get why you can't stay in hiding with the rest of us more than once a week, by the way

Right, I'll start Lang-proofing all my belongings.

We've been over this already. These...runs that I go on, they aren't worth risking you all.

[Because, you know, Ross isn't going to let them play 'prison break' a second time.]

And for the record, I miss you, too. I'll see you soon and when I do we'll make up for the missed time.

Yeah, I'll hold you to that, captain

Y'know though, if the runs aren't worth risking US, what about you?

I always make it up to you. True?

I'm just one person. Better just me than all of us. Even if that isn't a good answer just pretend it is.

Pretend it is? I don't know what we'd do if we lost you

If you'll let me be selfish, I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. I already miss you like hell and you're still alive

I thought the Avengers were a team for a reason, Steve

...When you put it that way.

You're right, we're a team, we are. But solo missions are going to continue to exist, and having more than one or two people will only compromise everything.

[There's about a minute or two in before the next message arrives.]

Look, I'm sorry for worrying you and when I get back, I'll give the solo outings a break.

You can have one of us do some missions instead of you all the time, too. Teamwork?

But man, Steve, don't be sorry about worrying me... I think it just comes naturally at this point

You should be more sorry for thinking you have to do everything on your own

'cause you don't

I know I don't, I just... Teamwork. Got it.

Guess I just felt better knowing it was only me at risk, kinda forgot I was being selfish in the process. We'll send out one of the birds, next time. Meanwhile, I'll stay behind and make sure you do the laundry the RIGHT way.

( scott actually has to pause at that, torn between smiling and putting his face in his hands. )

Here I was feeling happy you actually listened to me and then you had to go knock me down like that

Why are you always like this?

I do the laundry perfectly fine!

Because if I didn't that would mean you'd get off way too easy.

Also, you've not only shrank two of Wanda's tops, but you also ended up bleaching a lot of Sam's clothes.

Just a tip: never put bleach in colored clothes and always assume to hang dry Wanda's things. And just don't wash my things.

Okay first of all I can get Wanda's clothes back to normal size, all right? Fiddling with size is my thing

Second of all the falcon drew on my shirts first

And lastly I won't wash your clothes but now your shirts will smell like me

No no no. No, using pym particles on anyone's stuff.

No retaliating and causing even more damage. Honestly, do you all turn into children when I'm gone?

And most importantly, leave the shirts as they are, I wouldn't mind them smelling like you. ...and now I can't unsee you wearing my them.

More than turning into children, I just think some people get stir crazy while doing nothing in hiding. Some people, not me.

And for the record, I have a bone to pick with you for how loose these things are around my shoulders and arms and everything.

You're a full-body insult, Steve Rogers.

And I've been wearing this shirt all day.

Uh-huh, sure you don't. You're the role-model for maturity.

Oh, yeah? If it's anymore insult to you, all those shirts fit pretty tight to me.

[How's that for a slap to the face? Annnd hold on a sec. Steve just arches his brow at that last.]

Any way I can get visual confirmation of that? It's been a long day and seeing you nearly engulfed in my shirt would make it a whole lot better. :)

What do you want from me? Are you trying to knock me down or raise me up because at this point I can't tell

Actually I'm pretty flustered just thinking about it so give me like five minutes to get myself to quit laughing

( flustered or not, though, scott sends a photograph. he'll be sure to delete it later, mostly because the phone isn't permanently his, but he's got himself sitting up in front of a mirror and--yeah, the shirt's hanging off of him like nobody's business.

the most embarrassing thing is how close one sleeve is to falling off. )

You see that? How can I not feel insulted wearing this and knowing it's TIGHT on you

Remember what I said about going easy on you, earlier? Yeah, that still stands.

[And wow, that photo is really...ridiculous, Steve definitely gets a good laugh out of it and then he's tilting his head. Heh. Interesting. He's never really given much thought to how much bigger he was than Lang and a lot of the others, but particularly Lang.]

And yet, you've been wearing it all day. What's that say about you?

Oh and just so you know, I'm saving that picture. You look so adorably pitiful that I can hardly resist.

I think it says that I'm a sentimental idiot who wants to believe this whole experience is the closest I can get to having your missing self around

Because, sadly, my massive crush on you is still a thing that's happening even after getting to know you and how you refuse to ever give me a break

i.e. DON'T SAVE SOMETHING I LOOK PITIFUL IN, STEVE

OH MY GOD

that's right

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suddenly plot

i'd apologize but...i'm not sorry

thanks for giving me the opportunity to have scott worried about him /weak

you're welcome. I am kinda sorry this went kinda angsty instead of sexy

DON'T BE i'm all for the accidental cr

good to know!

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steve is killing me i can't take this