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for that drunk meme yesterday

The Hangover Meme

Last thing you remember you were having a couple of drinks, now you're waking up... Where? What the hell happened last night? Why does the small of your back hurt? Why is there a monkey in the room? Why is Kate Perry's "Last Friday Night" playing on the radio? Piece it all together, because you weren't alone for the ride. Anything and everything could have happened last night, but if you look for the clues, you may be able to figure it out. The problem is... Do you want to know?

These rules are very loose, do whatever feels right!
→ Post with your character (Name and canon in the subject bar).
→ People reply to your character with their own (CUES ARE OPTIONAL!!; roll or choose from the offered list if you wish, as many times as you want).
→ If you wish to roll for cues, the original poster can do so as well.
→ Try to figure out why you have "Bait Master" tattooed on your back.

Optional Cue List:
1. In A Weird Place: A strip club? A gay bar? A sushi restaurant's supply room? Wherever it is, it sure raises a lot of questions about how you got there.
2. A Picture Says A Thousand Words: Maybe you think to check your phone, and you notice that there's some new images saved on it. Maybe they're hilarious! Maybe you'll wish you hadn't looked...
3. Inked: Whoever it was who convinced you that a neon-colored cutie mark would make for a bitchin' tattoo needs to be excommunicated. Or maybe worse, you got a SWEET tattoo of a sunglasses-wearing skull with sneakers... but it's on your face.
4. Hair-Razing Experience: Why does your head feel so odd? Maybe it's more than the hangover; it might have something to do with your hair being a bit different than you remember it. Maybe it's not there. Maybe it wasn't bright neon blue last you remember. Maybe you didn't have any before, but suddenly you're Fabio! It's pretty weird either way.
5. Fashion Mistake: Okay, maybe you wound up in a temple with a bunch of Buddhist monks, considering you're wearing one of their robes. Or maybe you went to a football game considering you've got a cheerleader uniform on. Or maybe things are weirder than that. You probably don't want to know why you're wearing the mascot's uniform.
6. Total Wardrobe Meltdown: Worst case scenario. Your clothes aren't just wrong... they're gone. Maybe if you're lucky, at least your companion is the one wearing them.
7. Who's that?: Good news everyone! You find yourself in a bed. Bad news, who the heck is that next to you?
8. Fought The Law (And The Law Won): Apparently Officer Jones didn't like the things you called him last night, because he's glaring at you pretty hard from behind those bars... Oh wait. He's in front of the bars. YOU'RE the one behind them.
9. Additional Baggage: Is that a monkey in your room or a baby? Either way, you can't just leave it. Well, you could probably leave the monkey, but why would you?
10. Hog Wild (DIY Drunk Shenanigans): Who the hell knows? Maybe you started a riot. Maybe you robbed a bank. Maybe you saved the world! It's a mystery to everyone! ... Well, actually it's probably only a mystery to you. Everyone else will probably remember it forever.

WE'RE NEVER DRINKING AGAIN. ~~Until next Friday Night~...~~

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Ember really shouldn't go out drinking. Especially with the headache she developed as she woke up. Of course that did subside a bit as she lifted some and realized there were more pressing matters; she was on top of someone she didn't know and they were both quite naked. Her legs were straddling one of Santana's and it was clear they did at least something the night prior.

Deciding she didn't want to deal with this she would pretend to be asleep. She would leave whoever this girl is to find out on her own that she went to bed with a famous singer and guitarist.]

[Santana has been drinking for a while now, she was quite young when she started. So, you'd think she's be used to alcohol and its effects by now but, no. She drinks way more than she should most of the time and finds herself in some...strange situations. It seems like this time is no different anyway. Why break the habit of a lifetime...

Her eyes flicker open slowly as light starts to filter into the room. Once she gets used to the light she decides she better assess the situation. She notices she's naked and the woman lying beside her....who is that? It's not the first time she's woken up with a woman she doesn't know but it doesn't make it easier. She whispers to herself.]

Oh god, not again...

[Okay that makes her open her eyes.]

You've done this before?

[Despite anything she indulged in she had never ended up in bed with a fan.]

[Damn, that wasn't exactly meant to be heard by her...or anyone for that matter. It's not exactly something that she's proud of after all it just tends to...happen on occasion.]

Uh...yeah. I mean only a few times. No big deal...

[She bites her lip before speaking again] Please tell me you remember something about last night?

Not really. About all I remember is going out for drinks after doing a gig.

Oh, right....I can't seen to remember a thing. Although I do remember going to a gig...

[She winces a little as her head gets a sharp pain and she reaches up a hand to her head. God, hangovers are the worst]

Wait...don't tell me...it was you wasn't it? You're the performer I went to see! [Well at least even when she's drunk she has good taste]

Exactly. Ember's my name if you need help remembering.

[She couldn't help but smile despite the awkward situation.]

So do you want to try going back to sleep?

Ember, of course...

[Ember. How had she not remembered that? She was the one who had wanted to go to the concert in the first place. A few flashes are coming back but nothing too clear. She shakes her head]

No, I really don't think I'll be able to get back to sleep now.

Do you want anything then? Room service can bring you up anything you want.

[So taking shots every time 'Rock Me Like a Hurricane' played at the strip club seemed like a really brilliant idea last night. Several hours later and enough alcohol to ground anything human, Dante is stirring in the leathery cushions of a booth of said strip club with a hangover and glitter over his lower torso.

Hey, it could be worse. If he stays for another few hours he does not have to pay a cover charge and that is some silver lining right there. Spotting Heine with his one uncovered eye brings a smirk of satisfaction. He deserves a medal or something for getting him to go, past the threatening violence part.]

Morning snowflake.

[He taunts the best a morning after partying and having Charity leaning on you can allow. It was Charity right? Jasmine maybe? Man his head hurts.]

[good thing they aren't quite human then, huh. it had taken a lot to convince heine, but he really does seem to be losing his edge if he complied for the sake of shutting dante's trap. if it'd been badou he'd probably just kick the guy in the nuts and leave, but if badou's a roach, dante's a titanium roach, and heine had been too lazy to beat that.

crumpled on a loveseat with an incredibly brave girl draped over his side, heine doesn't remember much of what happened after the first bottle of hard liquor was emptied, but he's sure there had to have been something slipped into his drinks. alcohol doesn't have an effect on his body, but he got high somehow and forgot his hobby of keeping a minimum five metres away from women. now, though, it's all coming back to him. the rage, too.

heine's response to such a chipper greeting starts with a thud (the girl being thrown onto the floor), continues with a flying whisky bottle, and ends with poof as heine collapses back into the pillows, though holding out long enough to see the bottle make contact with dante's face. spreading a hand over his eyes, heine nurses an abnormal migraine and shoots deathglares at the culprit of it all. yes, he is most certainly plotting murder at the moment.]

[He probably should tell him that no lap dances were given to him, well not that he recalls directly. Now being thought of as a titanium roach would hurt his feelings Heine. Dante likes to akin himself to a young Keith Richards, much better looking and still hard to kill.

Course that is not what he is thinking about right now. Nope. It is that headache. While bad, he has had enough of them to know how to operate under such conditions. Should know that is because that bottle hurts more he soon finds out.

His response is more or less a new word built around a handful of convenient curses. Head to the back of the booth and hand sliding across what of his face that is not littered with broken glass and whiskey, which he may add is a total waste, Dante laughs.

Yes. Laughs. Sure it hurt like hell, but he has to admit it is humorous it that 'resort to violence as an answer' sort of way.]

Whoa whoa...hold on there snowflake.

[Petnames. He has them for all his friends.]

Strip club...not under the red lights if that's what you're thinkin'.

[Even he abides those boundaries. Besides he has a thing for Dagger Eyes right? Either way, he is going to say yes for sake of making things line up.]

Edited 2012-03-29 19:19 (UTC)

[SOMEONE LIKED MY MEME ENOUGH TO DIG IT UP AND REPOST IT I FEEL SO WARM AND FUZZY YOU ARE AWESOME]

[ Katia is really not sure where she woke up this time. Oh god what did she do last night and why does her neck hurt? ]

[Kanaya on the other hand is a bit more well-informed about where she's waking up, mostly because it happens to be the floor. Since her skirt isn't exactly as high up as it's supposed to be and she fell asleep face down, so a cursory glance may reveal the big, appropriately rainbow-colored "Rainbow Drinker" tattooed on the small of her back. Of course, what she'll likely find more distressing when she regains consciousness is the fact that her hair's been cut and styled to resemble cat ears; impressive, considering the horns.

As for your neck, well. Dried stains on Kanaya's fangs and lips might shed some light on that one.]

[Kirby stands behind at the door to Tom's room, an all-too vacant smile flashing his way.]

Looks like someone had a rough night. Good time? Find a pretty little lady?

[Tom is currently hiding under his wonderful warm comforter, something he's never had the pleasure of until now. His head is killing him and the sunlight burns, but he pokes his head out from under it and says something to Kirby that is more unintelligible than usual.]

We~ll, a nice hot coffee should cheer you up! [It seems he had been hiding one behind his back this entire time. Be careful that he's not the next Annie of coffee.]

The best recipe, I find- or, well, found of course! Silly me.

It always works better than hair of the dog! Well, if you'll mind the expression...

[Everything hurts and the sun is too bright, even through his window curtains, but Tom is nothing if not always grateful. He smiles, albeit weakly, and sits up in bed, reaching out for the coffee.]

S'alright, I don' mind it. An' thank you very much.

[In some strange car in the middle of the desert... Suki's not really sure what happened, but her head is pounding and the sun glaring off the sand is far too bright. It's been a while since she's gotten herself fucked up like this...

...but seriously, who's car is this?

Half worried about a kidnapping, she carefully sits up to peer in the front seat for a driver. A kidnapping wouldn't even be an improbability for her, so she's not sure whether to freak out or slam her head down and call herself an idiot. Probably both.]

[Human jail cells are cold, depressing, and uncomfortable.

They're a bit more uncomfortable after you've been drinking all night, and after you've gotten into a fight with another woman over a comment she made about how tacky Kanaya looked decked out like Kanye West if he had a really nice figure.

Because that woman clearly had no taste whatsoever and just couldn't realize how obscenely classy Kanaya looked with those striped glasses, tight jeans, basketball jersey, assorted bling, and, uh, her hair all shaved up to her ears.

... Yeah that last one may not fly too hot with her when she stops struggling to make her forehead stop kicking her ass.]

[ opps, sorry rose.

it really isn't her fault that-- okay maybe it is but she doesn't remember too much. dirk should bail them out sooner or later.

don't be too mad.

she snickers. ]

Totally not what I expected from a family bonding, but it's cool.

[ gotta be sure she's not mad before she breaks out the tattoo right? ]

[Drunken makeovers sound a whole lot cooler in theory than in actual practice. Maybe that would explain why Kanaya's hair is all bouffant-styled and shiny, and has a decidedly neon green highlight on the ends. Maybe it'd also explain why Kanaya's got a rainbow thundercloud tattooed on her vibrant ass. Or why she's got on the assless chaps and stiletto heels to display that sort of thing.

... Yeah suffice to say that playing extreme dress-up games for girls with a drunk Kanaya is the sort of thing that can get out of hand pretty damn quick.

Maybe they can discuss that when their heads don't feel like they're hosting a jackhammer convention.]

[ Pink hair extensions, the classiest of cat-themed tramp-stamps, and a nun habit. Where the fuck would they have gone with assless chaps and a nun costume. God, I hope this is a costume.

Cracks an eye open to glare at her bed partner. ]

whoeverve u are
u aer breathign
SO
LOUD
rn

I Am Not Breathing Any Louder Than You Are Speaking
Which Is Loud Enough To Cause A Considerable Pain To My Think Pan Right Now By The Way
Ugh

[Kanaya groans and rubs her forehead, not noticing how pretty the Hello Kitty fingernails she's got on are (a crime, considering how adorable they are). Instead she just... tries to sit up... Oh, no, no, that's not a thing that is going to be happening right now, no.

Just gonna lay back down in her stripperiffic outfit and try to stop existing for a moment longer.]

ssssshhhhh

[Head still firmly buried in the pillows, reaches over to pat Kanaya on the bouffant-ed head, as if this is a situation in any sort of need for a shoosh-pap, or if Roxy has even half an idea who's lying next to her. But hangovers are nothing new to Roxy, so she can tease this person a little bit. ]

tehrre there
thinkpan

That
No
Stop
Youll Mess Up My Hair
Quit

[Kanaya reaches up to deflect Roxy's hands, because fuck man that hair was nice and she is going to be really damn confused about it when she realizes it was a thing that happened.

She reluctantly sits up and brushes her hair back into position as if it's perfectly natural for it to be bouncing and behaving all sexy like that. Maybe if she tries hard enough she can force her hands into her face and make it stop screaming.

... Except then she has to open her eyes. And then she sees those chaps.]

What The Fuck

[Oh god his life is pain]

why the hell is there a picture of you wearing a tiara on my phone?

Theres what

you
tiara
photo op
my phone, for some reason?

nice tutu, by the way

DELETE IT

what and lose such good blackmail?
no way

well
maybe if you make it worth my while

Wait

What do you mean

dessert for a week

or this goes to everyone on my contact list

[ so, somehow they both decided to get matching tattoos on their arms! or half of the same one each, really. it's a little love heart with the words 'DEATHBROS 4 LYFE get it life' inside! yes, they actually included the 'get it' part in small text as part of their drunken design.

so, all in all, it's awkward but something they can laugh about later.

the fact they got the same tattoo applied to their butts, maybe not. good thing neither of them have noticed that yet! actually, Hijiri at least is still at the 'waking up off the floor and nursing his aching head' stage. ]

Ugh~...

[Oh god, who took a sledgehammer to his head. It's pounding and throbbing and he can't even think of any more terms for what he's currently feeling right now. It's not helped by the fact that he's waking up upside down, hanging off of a chair in a precarious way.]

...Hnnnngh....ugh...

[ see, he's more worried about the sudden difficulty in forming words. ] The ph-... phrase is... [ actually, why does his arm hurt just as much as his head? the pain in his ass is probably from the way he was sleeping (yes, he can actually do that much thinking in this state), but that... ]

Uh, 'what did I do last night'...? [ turn and then pause because OH GOD KUROSAKI'S HERE HI HELP. ]

[Ichigo is noticing those pains too, and he's scowling fiercly as he's getting more and more aware of the shit that's going on around him.

Oh and that Hijiri's here too. ...At least they didn't wake up naked in bed together.]

...dunno...

[ will wonders never cease... ]

I... think drinking was involved. That's just a guess though...

...No, it was definitely involved. Augh...

[Sitting up now! Also auaufghdfgu CAN HE JUST DIE THIS IS SO PAINFUL]

Thanks for that... uh, insight, Kurosaki.

[ EVERYTHING IS SUFFERING. LET HIM WRITHE ON THE FLOOR A LITTLE LONGER! ]

[Wine hangovers are the worst...]

[Catherine, being all to used to waking up in an unfamiliar bed, didn't even bother questioning her surroundings. Though the drinking did leave her a bit foggy on what all happened the night before, the blond wasn't even concern with who she was sleeping next to.

Tiny arms wrapping around one of Claire's, she snuggled up close to him.]

[Claire isn't someone who stirs, usually, so the moment she makes contact with him, he's up and alert, fully registering the other person's presence. He blinks rapidly, still reeling from the affects of a slight haze.

He looks over his shoulder... a woman? BLUSH.]

[Well she certainly wasn't expecting him to wake up so quickly. Arms still wrapped around him, her eyes glancing up towards him with a small giggle slipping past her lips.]

Good morning, did you sleep well?

[Alright, this wasn't exactly sitting well with him. A strange girl in his bed? What could that possibly -- he quickly glances down and sighs in relief once he sees that he was still mostly fully clothed. He was a bit too shy to check if she was, so he keeps his eyes off of her as he rises up to sit. He folds over, knees drawing up as he cradles his head in one hand, feeling a headache hit him like a ton of bricks.]

Ahh... what the hell? [Oops! He swore in front of a lady! He glances over his shoulder at her to apologize, but quickly looks away.]

[She had finally let go of his arm, lips forming into a frown as she watched him. It wasn't surprising, really, since being a succubus had put her in this kind of situation many times before.]

Are you okay? [Her voice gives a hint of concern, sitting up to reveal that she was not wearing any clothing underneath the sheets to begin with. Though she wasn't at all uncomfortable with it.]

[What!? Claire glances over at her, jumping up off the bed in a flash as he throws a blanket at her! Cover up! Why is she naked?! OH GOD... DID HE FiNGERBANG HER? OH GOD... OH GOD, HIS PURITY. HE'S GOING TO HAVE TO URGE HER TO MARRY HIM NOW!]

Ah - wh-what just happened?! Are you okay? [Panic is definitely setting in by now.]

What happened? Are you telling me... you don't remember? [Of course, it could be all just a lie. But she would be lying even more if she said she didn't enjoy watching Claire jump from one place to the next.]

I'm just fine, though.

[He bows his head in a meek fashion, shaking his head after a moment of surveying her. She didn't appear to be threatening in any way, so it wasn't likely that she was an assassin sent to seduce and kill him... so... He turns away from her, walking over to the window so he can open it for some fresh air. He definitely needed it.]

Who are you? [His tone is a bit more serious than he intends it to be, but he never took well to being put off.] I mean... if you don't mind tellin' me your name, I'd like to know.

Don't tell me you forgot that too. [She pouts for a moment, before exhaling loudly as she returned to her usual, teasing tone.] You called it out a lot yesterday, but oh well~.

[Catherine, stop, you're gonna break him.] It's Catherine.

[Ah... that kind of throws him off, which is evident in his expression as he looks over his shoulder at her. A chilly breeze flows in from beneath the glass of the window.]

Catherine... [He mutters to himself, brow furrowing as he tries to make sense of the situation. He never liked the feeling of being shut out by his world.]

[ Blaine's just groaning at the sun. Stupid thing. What the fuck is it even up?

Oh right. It's morning.

He groans and covers his eyes as it sits up and notices two things. He's naked as the day he was born.

And he's on the roof of the old school.In LIMA. ]

[Rory reaches out his hand, groping for Blaine.] Shhh, groan quieter, love. And please shut the curtains...

[He mumbles, realizing he feels chilled and tries to find the blankets, which he can't. Reluctantly he opens his eyes, then sits up with a start.] Blaine...

[And now the realization comes to him too, they are in Lima, both naked, on the roof. What the actual fuck?]

Cad é in ainm na bhflaitheas a tharla? [He asked, confused, lapsing into Gaelic]

Well this is new.

[ He said, laughing softly as he rubbed his eyes before groaning at the sun again. What the fuck had he drunk last night? The last thing he recalled was fucking Rory in the bathroom.]

Ulgh...it's too bright for this shit.

I am glad it's not snowing or raining! [Rory said, curling up his legs around himself, squinting in the hopes that his clothes would magically appear. They did not. He scooted closer to Blaine, then cried out as he felt something painful.]

Bleeding Christ, what the hell is on my back? It feels like I got stung by a hundred bees! [He said, feeling at the base of his spine gingerly. Better learn how to say tramp stamp in Gaelic, boyo.]

If it starts snowing now I'll murder you. [ He said as he rubbed his eyes before glancing over at his back and bursting out laughing. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.]

You have a tramp stamp.

[ He's just going to laugh harder.]

Oh well, gives me something to look at when your bent over.

Oh, no, no, no, don't tease me Blaine! That's not funny! [Rory said in alarm, feeling his back, his face horror-struck.]

What the bloody hell does it say? If it says 'property of Blaine Anderson' I'm going to jump off this roof. [He shook his head, hoping for clarity but finding only a headache.]

Oh Rory. It's totally. Utterly funny.

[ He leans over to peer at it before shrugging.] I have no idea. It's in that language you love to speak sometimes.

'Tis not! Fuck yourself hard, Blaine Anderson!

[Rory covered his face, sighing heavily.] Brilliant. Now I need clothes, a ladder to get off this bloody roof, and a mirror to see what my arse says. Can this day get any better?

I'll fuck myself however I feel like Rory.

[ He laughed and layed back, smirking over at him.]

Would a blowjob make you feel better?

Oh truly? Well, feel most free, Blaine. I shall watch.

[Rory opened his mouth to say that was the most balmy suggestion considering they were trapped, then shut it again.] Aye, why not?

[ He arched his eyebrow at that before scrambling to his feet and turning his back to Rorv before bending over and parting his cheeks, running a finger over his hole with a soft groan.]

Just watch huh?

[ He made a show of licking his finger like a mini cock before slidingi to over his hole and pressing it into himself.]

Ah..I do love to fuck myself.

Blainnnneeee.... [He said, his voice taking on a harsh edge...okay, screw the being trapped, someone was bound to come eventually, right? Well, hopefully not like this second, but soon.]

[He pounced his boyfriend.] No. Get my cock wet with your spit, I want to fuck you before we bloody well die up here of exposure and surely go to Hell for being so wanton.

[ He laughed as Rory pounced him, chuckling as he pressed a kiss against his lips before moving down his body to kiss the top of his cock.]

For the record. Worth going to hell.

[ He smirked as he wrapped his lips around Rory's cock, sucking hard.]

[He pressed forward into Blaine's very inviting mouth, the tingle shooting up from his belly all the way to his head, making him feel dizzy, bloody fucking hell, no one had ever made him feel as good as Blaine did.] So worth it. Measann sé go maith...Blaine...

[He pulled out with a cry, it was so hard to not want to come that very second, his boyfriend's tongue did wicked things to him. Rory pushed Blaine down, moving behind him, and without ceremony, starting pushing into him, whimpering at how hot and tight he felt around his cock.]

[URGH, SOMEONE MUST DIE.]

[ ha ha ha ha oh waow. his head his throbbing.

just gonna. slowly wake up. must have been a LONG NIGHT PARTYING ho ho ho.

reeeaches out to his nightstand. which... isn't there. welp. OPENS ONE EYE.

opens the other.

D:

observes surroundings....

D: ]

I'd like to continue dreaming now.

[ THERE IS A SHOUT from nearby. Someone is paying John's bail, apparently. Whoa!

Is it Sherlock?

Lestrade?

Molly?

None of the above because in strolls one Jim Moriarty with a smile on his face. ]

Yep, that's him. C'mon, Johnny boy, let's go.

[ that is the sound of John's heart stopping.

and all the color is draining out of his face.

and if he had a weaker stomach, last night's tab would be coming up too BUT. he's just going to maintain a steady colorless deadpan.

oh yes. dreaming would be such a luxury right now.

the cell door opens.

]

I'm guessing there's no alternative option to actually sticking around then, is there? I was actually catching up on some long since needed shuteye.

Prrrrrobably not! You're wasting this man's valuable time, John, and I paid good money for you!

[ a snort ]

We have a long drive ahead of us. Do you even know where we are?

[ if this were aaaaaaaaanyone else he could probably buy five extra minutes and hope Sherlock felt like being bothered to drag his arse out of 221B but.

that's probably not happening.

DEEP BREATH. ]

Right then.

[ nods to the officer who... isn't wearing the usual English officer attire. oh. this isn't panning out to be good. at all. CLEARS HIS THROAT AND. steeeps out of the cell. not making eye contact with the lunatic who just saved his ass. no actually. the jail cell was probably doing that. ]

[ there is a smile and a tip of his head to the officer as he says thanks in something that sounds like... Italian, perhaps?

And then he follows John out the building to where a cute little car is waiting for them. ]

Don't lag around, we're on a tight schedule here, John!

[ ughghghg.

WAAAAAAAAIT.

spins around to face Moriarty because-- ]

I forgot to check out my belongings. That's a thing, isn't it? Oh! Also. I'm not getting in that car. Not with you.

[ MATTER OF FACT SMILE GOES HERE BC LOL BOY YOU BE TRIPPIN. ]

One, here.

[ tossing a bag to John ]

Two, you're in the middle of Rome, Italy, -- arrested after trying to molest a statue so what will you do without me?

I'm---

I did not!

[ CATCHES weh. so thoughtful. (unsure) ]

How did I even get... here? No. Don't answer that. I don't want to hear your answer.

[ shuffling through his shit weh weh. ]

I could take the train. Or fly. You know something that doesn't involve getting in an automobile with a complete lunatic, who as I recall, strapped me up in a vest of explosives.

Blame it on trust issues.

What's in the past is in the past.

[ pulling out sunglasses and putting them on his face like a baws ]

Feel free to stay here without money, a dead cellphone, and miles away from baker street.

[ snorts. ]

No money! What do you mean no money? Of course I've got---

[ shuffling through his wallet. and it's. totally empty sans filled pub punch card and ID. WHAT.

oh god. maybe the station has a charger. or.

he's a bit rusty with his Italian and...

feeling particularly suicidal apparently because he is FINDING HIMSELF JUST. walking on over to the passenger's seat and awkwardly getting in.

clears... throat. ]

I suppose asking to borrow your charger would be ridiculous.

Completely.

[ And then a smile as he approaches the driver's seat. Let's go, hombre. ]

Ah, what's that quote? "It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses."

[ looks at John expectantly ]

[ feebly tries to turn his phone on anyway. IN HOPES THAT HE WILL SEE ANOTHER DAY. ALAS. it truly is dead.

just. solemn disappointment on John's face rfn and what.

is he quoting the Blues Brothers?

DARES TO MAKE EYE CONTACT...

oh god he wants an actual response.

legit face in hands. right fucking here. ]

Hit it...

[ HE IS SO PROUD OF YOU, JOHN

SO

PROUD

and then he starts the car and drives off. Putting in something in the stereo--

is that Queen? ]

[ this is the worst day ever.

i mean, there's a significant lack of explosives, bullets, blood, and gore but. it's just unexpectedly awful even without all that.

oh no he actually likes Freddie Mercury. RUDE.

HITS THE ON/OFF BUTTON. NO FUCKS GIVEN. ]

What am I doing in Italy?

You turned off the music...

[ frowns at the stereo but whatever whatever, looks back to the road then ]

I said you were molesting a statue, John. Don't make me repeat myself.

[ He'll hit it again when he feels like climbing out the window.

Or he might actually do that too. Circumstances, circumstances. ]

No I mean like---how did I get here? If you even know that which, I can only assume you do.

[ TYPICAL OKAY. ]

Of course I do.

[ SMILES and keeps driving doot doot ]

And we're going to be on the road for the next, I don't know, forty-eight hours together--assuming we're both still alive by the end of that period--the polite thing to do would be to tell me how I arrived.

[ this is like dealing with Sherlock except less receptive to the general concept of human empathy period. like. ever. ]

If you're still alive in twenty-four hours, I'll tell you.

[ ehehehe :y ]

...

[ WOW. R U D E.

sob.

life is so unfair. ]

That's not... very reassuring. Oh wait. I forgot who I willingly jumped on board with here.

I'm not that crazy, John. I'm actually quite sociable.

[ SIGH rude ]

[ if the situation weren't so mind numbingly terrifying, awful, hideous, etc. etc. etc., John might actually laugh.

HA HA HA. ]

Something tells me you actually believe that.

[ looks at watch. oh cool. it's been 15 minutes. ]

This is the longest span of time you've ever spent with me, don't judge so quickly.

[ omg r u serious. ]

You just made a remark implying that I might not even be alive in twenty-four hours. Apologies for making gross assumptions.

You really have no sense of humor.

Tell me how I got to Italy.

Plane.

[ :) ]

[ wanker. ]

A... plane. That's preposterous! I would remember getting on a plane to go to Italy.

[ blaming this on Sherlock. ha ha ha ha look at that. he's actually blaming Sherlock before he even blames you, Moriarty. VOLUMES HAVE BEEN SPOKEN. ]

You've been intoxicated for the last four days.

WHAT?!

[ ha ha go figure. ]

[

]

Don't yell.

Apologies.

[ WAIT. no. WHY IS HE APOLOGIZING? curse you embedded default etiquette. ]

But for days? Was I literally inebriated beyond the bounds of comprehension for the past four days?

[ a beat. HYPOTHESIS. ]

Sherlock?

[Except Sebastian doesn't have a phone, so we'll just say he has a stack of photographs which he finds tucked neatly under his palm when he wakes up. Excuse him while he ignoes that pounding in his head that he hasn't felt since he was at least twenty years younger and incapable of holding his liquor to flip through them.

And his expression slowly changes into one of absolute horror. These are not hilarious, not to him, but they are utterly ridiculous and no one ever needs to see them ever.]

Oh--balls.

[ AT LEAST YOU ARE IN A BED, SEBASTIAN

there is a groan from down on the floor ]

Sebastian?

[ Wow his head is killing him ]

[Nope, too busy ripping these up one by one.]

I suggest you go back to sleep.

[That's right. Go back to sleep. Right there on the floor.]

[ they probably leave the bedroom and the photos are ALL OVER ]

This side of the floor grew hot.

[Oh god. PROBABLY.]

And need I remind you that you have legs?

[He glances down at the floor briefly, grimacing at a fresh stab of pain in his head.] Although, the question remains as to if they'll work at the moment.

[ there is just a grunt as he rolls over to the cooler side of the floor. much better. ]

Possibly. I'll figure that out later.

[Your voice is really grating on his nerves today, Jim. Can't you handle a hangover like a normal person and sleep it off?]

Since you're awake, maybe you want to see your masterpieces. [Untorn photos fluttering right down to you. Because obviously you took them. There is no one else. No one else.]

[ AND WHAT ARE ON THESE PHOTOS he wonders as he feels them land on him ]

You sound annoyed.

[JUST RIDICULOUS THINGS, really. Hats. Maybe false moustaches. Anything you want. Sebastian is bound to be annoyed either way.]

Do I? Would you prefer some other emotion? Because I'm sure I'm incapable and it's all thanks to this headache.

There's aspirin in the bedside drawer, don't be so picky.

[ gosh you are so fussy, sebastian ]

[He is a poor bb and his head hurts, okay. Don't blame him. Look, he's being good and nearly ripping the whole drawer out to get to the asprin.]

Who's being picky? And whose idea was it to go drinking last night anyway? [His own, likely.]

_{[ Sherlock has no idea what happened last night, and given that he's Sherlock Holmes, that's kind of disturbing. But it's fine, he'll just try and ignore the headache that's throbbing dully and he's just going to... stay in bed.

Yes.

That is totally a plan. Right? ]}

[ nnnnnnot unless the figure next to you wakes up

except he's about to, curling closer to the pillow he's claimed and giving a light snore ]

_{[ okay what no. someone is in his bed. next to him. in his room. this isn't allowed.

fine. FINE. He'll look.

And ... oh, well, that's... something. It's not his room. Actually he has no idea where he is and why is Moriarty next to him jfc.

you know what, he's just going to lean over and clap next to his ear. wake the fuck up. ]}

[ there is a hand swatting you away ]

Quite rude, Sherlock. You could be a better bedguest than that.

That doesn't sound like me at all.

_{[ no. he's never a good guest in any situation, so clearly he's expecting too much. ]}

I know but I thought it might be amusing to hear it out loud.

[ still has his eyes closed, still curled up against the pillow ]

_{[ oh right well, Sherlock thinks it might be amusing to kick you out of the bed.

OH LOOK IT IS. ]}

[ DOWN HE GOES

holding up a finger when he lands ]

That was very rude, this is my bedroom anyway.

_{[ that's how he rolls. he's going to stretch out on the bed and glare up at the ceiling. ]}

Why am I here?

You asked.

[ sighs and gets up -- at least he's wearing pants ]

_{[ Sherlock doesn't even care if he's wearing anything. whatever. ]}

Why?

Beats me.

[ actually he knows why but hey whatever whatever he does what he wants ]

_{[ OF COURSE YOU KNOW god. fine, whatever, sherlock is going back to sleep. you're annoying. ]}

[ Well this is a fine mess, isn't it? It isn't like it's really all that unfathomable when you get down to it, but John hadn't exactly expected to wake up strewn haphazard over a holding cell today. His head hurts and he's pretty certain that he's lost some sort of valuable information within the past twelve hours or so, but it's not hard at all to guess who's behind it. ]

Sherlock.

[ A croak. He can't see the man, but if he's in a holding cell, there's only one reason for it. He clears his throat. ]

Sherlock.

[ Sitting up sort of hurts. His back pops with it and there's a low groan for it somewhere in his chest. Everything feels stiff and cottony and-- no, some of the restriction can't all be coming from his body. His clothes feel tight and cool against his skin. Definitely not his jacket or any of his shirts.

...John didn't know they still had the ninja costumes from the Geek Interpreter. ]

_{[ Oh, god, it's too bright and this bed is hard. He knows it's too bright without even opening his eyes; the sunlight's streaming through the... bars? Yes, the shadows are lined up with a perfect few inches in between each bar - and it's not like this is the first time he's been in jail for the night.

Though this is for a very different reason.

And his head is absolutely pounding with pain. Why - well, they must have been drinking. Yes, he remembers drinking, that much he's sure of but the rest of the night seems strangely blank. There are a few images here and there but... no, it's not easy to think about and it makes his head swim with the effort, so he just groans and tries to ignore his name being said by John. He's pleased to see he got the top bunk bed - things are in their natural order, then. ]}

Shut up, John.

_{[ Because you're too loud and everything's spinning so he just - needs a moment. A moment to think and sort everything out, from the way his clothes are skin tight and - oh, he has two pillows. He must have stolen John's at some point. Well. ]}

We're in jail, aren't we?

_{[ it's more of a statement than a question, but he feels as though he should ask it before hazarding actually opening his eyes. ]}

[ There's a grunt that roughly translates into 'oh good, you are here' and 'fuck you, then' in response to the command. All John wants to do is sink back down into this terrible bed (he doesn't even have a pillow, for fucksakes) and go right back to sleep pretending he never woke up in the first, but he can't. Sherlock is talking to him. ]

No, we're at the fucking Langham. What do you want from room service?

[ Rolling out of the cot, he takes a few wobbling steps before he's clinging to the sink, blinking at himself in the plastic mirror. God, but he looks like shit, hair standing out in patches and red-rimmed eyes. He's got a bruise on his cheek, too, just beneath his right eye. After touching that a moment, John cranks on the sink and dunks his head in, trying to use the splash of water to wash his face and rouse him a little more. ]

Christ.

_{[ Sherlock happily takes the silence that immediately follows that incredibly eloquent grunt to drape his arm over his forehead, hiding from the bright lights that is their jail cell. He listens to John's unsteady steps with the slightest of frowns as he tries to recall whatever got them into this mess the night before.

And where's Mycroft? He should be bailing them out by now. ]}

I expect you don't remember anything either, then.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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for that drunk meme yesterday

Santana Lopez | Glee | Completely OPEN

7

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Heine Rammsteiner | DOGS: Bullets&Carnage | OTA

1; I regret nothing. :|

heine regrets everything. and you are awesome, i am not worthy.

Nonsense. It was all Dante's plan. Also I could never take my own Heine to a strip club. :|

Pink Floyd | The Wall | OTA

Richter Belmont | Castlevania

Edgar Roni Figaro | Final Fantasy VI

Kanaya Maryam ♍ Homestuck ♍ Aged up

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Rolled a 3 and a 4

Tom McNair | Being Human

It's about time I tagged you.I keep seeing you about! :D

Omg Kirby you homewrecker.

Sorry for the late reply! Life came up.

I sympathize.

Arthur Pendragon | Merlin [Modern AU]

Liam Reid | OC (universalis)

1

Eames | Inception

Morinozuka Takashi - Ouran High School Host Club

Akutagawa Jirou | Prince of Tennis | aged up five years

Rose Lalonde ☾ Homestuck

4, 5, and 8

3 & 8

Roxy Lalonde | Homestuck

3, 4, and 5 because we are all about swag

strike a pose cause shit just got real

B)

Re: B)

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Ichigo Kurosaki | Bleach

2

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3 hi I hideousd something up for you

MY GOD amazing

thought you'd like it

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Claire Stanfield | Baccano!

7

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OH MY GOD, I JUST LAUGHED SO HARD.

LMFAO HE'S SUCH A DUMBASS

AND CATHERINE IS JUST GONNA KEEP MESSING WITH HIM

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Charles Xavier [AU] | XMFC | OTA

Jane Foster ⇢ Marvel Cinematic

Eleventh Doctor | Doctor Who

Rory Flanagan/Glee/boys only

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