bakerstreet | the only one who can fuck me is me.

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the only one who can fuck me is me.

would you fuck your clone?
a crack meme for pondering the impossible...

A question as old as time, or at least as old as Buzzfeed. How many intellectuals over the years have pondered the very same question you're being faced with now? Did Socrates wonder about the moral quandaries that accompany clone sex? Did Plato? Does a dilemma so complex have a right answer? If so, does your character know it?

how to play

1. Your character has been posed the question, 'Would you fuck your clone?' Top-levels should be responses to this question. Blank top-levels will be deleted.

2. Chat around with others and debate over the ethics of engaging your hypothetical clone in such a way.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ what the hell is this ]

Excuse me? Are you- Are you propositioning me?

[ absurd! surely even sampo isn't that bold! not that what he says isn't true, but that is not any of his business. ]

( buddy, ALL of belobog is sampo's business. )

Do you know me at all? What I'm offering is a business deal: nothing more, nothing less.

A business deal. And what, exactly, do you get out of a deal like this?

[ he's not saying yes. ]

Intimacy is not meant to be a... a business deal.

( he's not saying no!! )

On the contrary! Intimacy is nothing but making deals. Two parties, coming together, negotiating their desires and coming to a compromise? That's business, friend.

But, as for what I'd be getting out of things... I get the joy of seeing one (1) Captain Gepard in a way that no one else has. That's all the reward I need.

Your views on intimacy are disappointingly cynical, but I cannot say I am surprised.

[ where's the romance in that?! ]

As for allowing you to see me in a way no one else has, and believing you would not use it as blackmail material or hold it against me in some way? You must think I am incredibly naive.

( romance..... aw, gepard! so cute! )

And you must have an incredibly low opinion of me. ( unjustifiably so. ) Seriously, buddy. I'm a relic merchant! All I want is to make sales and bring joy to others! What part of that sounds like blackmail and despair to you?

[ yes, his opinion is rather low. ]

What of the people you have swindled? Do you think they experience joy?

[ yes he is changing the topic. ]

( not so fast, bud. )

So, that's a no to my offer, then?

...Set feelings aside, Captain. You won't break my heart by acting in your best interest.

Sampo. I am absolutely not going to engage in... physical intimacy, and I fail to see how exactly it would be in my best interest.

[ this man is dedicated to his work! ]

( physical intimacy... )

You can say the word, you know. I won't tell anyone.

...You are attempting to make fun of me.

No.

( yes. )

I just want to see if you have it in you.

Of course I have it in me! I simply am not going to play your game.

What's to play~? I'm only asking if Belobog's captain can say 'fuck' without flinching.

That isn’t even the appropriate term for it.

Appropriate term for..?

For... sexual intercourse.

...

( send gepard to jail for being too cute!! )

Who knew the Captain had a vulgar side??

It isn't vulgar. It is simply a natural part of-

[ how did they even get here??? ]

You were the one prodding me to say it.

Prodding? Harsh...

( but, well, he still got something from gepard, so he's pleased. he's always pleased with am entertaining reaction. he'll consider it a loss [or a win] when he loses gepard completely, which he suspects will happen any second now given the line of questioning. )

Natural enough for you to take part in it?

[ there is no way sampo isn't enjoying himself. that much is clear. somehow, gepard always ends up in situations like this. ]

Were I to find the right person, perhaps.

( wow, he really is a romantic, isn't he? )

You'll never find the right person battling Darkspawn on the front line. ( wrong game..? ) How about going out on a date instead?

[ a reasonable suggestion, for once, but- ]

I have no time for dates.

But you have time to chop it up with li'l ol' me? ( on the topic of clone-fucking, no less. ) Geppie! I'm honored!

I- No, that is not what I meant at all.

[ is that a headache coming on? ]

You are just... a distracting presence.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only