Who left this baby?

[pippilongsockings]

The Baby Meme

You don't know where it came from, you don't know who it belongs to, but suddenly there's a baby in your presence, and it's looking like it's your responsibility. Whether this child was left behind on a train or they just showed up on your character's doorstep, something has to be done here.

Time to ask others for help.

How to Play

1. State your character and preferences in the top-level.
   
2. Tag around and enjoy baby hijinks!
   
3. Bring diapers.

The Responsible One
Clearly, someone has to take charge here. This child needs to be returned to its guardians!

The Reluctant One
Nope, not happening. Not dealing with this. This is not your character's problem and they're more than happy to pawn this little bundle of joy off on someone else.

The Domestic One
While this kid might not be yours, it can't hurt to make things comfortable while you think of a plan. Maybe go shopping for kids' things, unless you already have some conveniently lying around the house.

The Rational One
Hello? Call the police?

The Reckless One
The last person who should be trusted with a child. Activities include taking the child for a motorcycle ride, attempting to feed the child cold pizza and Sprite, and educating the child on what it means to be punk rock.

The Co-Parent
Teamwork makes the dream work! Congrats. You're in this together, whether you want to be or not.

Choose Your Own Adventure
Naturally, every character will react differently upon being thrown into such a bizarre scenario. Feel free to ignore all of these possibilities and have your character march to the beat of their own drum!

Comments

bucky barnes | mcu

[unbucky]

[ The one who's way too old to deal with this. ]

elia martell | asoiaf | ota

[veryfond]

Maedhros | the silmarillion | ota

[holdshisown]

[tintila]

[Babies, or indeed families in any shape aren't common in these parts. She would know, she has walked the long path to Himring dozens, perhaps hundreds of times at this point. Sometimes she passes another elf or rarely a man but mostly the landscape is devoid of anything but rabbits and deer and the wolves that hunt them.

She was nearing the northern edge of Himlad when she heard a strange squawking, at first it sounded like a fox or a mountain cat but the time of day was wrong and there was a familiar timbre to the noise that drew her closer to it.

Trapped under remnants of a cart and what little remained of its driver was a baby, wrapped in so much cloth she can't help but think the parents (dead, for sure, there are too many limbs scattered over the grass and too much blood) must have been trying to hide it.

It was easily a days walk still to Himring, even at the pace of an elf but Mithiel tucks the baby against her as she looks in the cart for any supplies (none remained), and fished out a strange knife from the body of the mother, apologised to a corpse that will never hear her and ran with the baby northeast as fast as she could manage without hurting either of them.

The baby is asleep, thankfully, when she gets to the gates and says her usual hellos, more red-faced and exhausted than usual by far. She winds her way through the keep, shushing and bouncing the barely concealed baby as she walks.]

Maedhros? [It is nighttime but the elves still bustle, invigorated by the presence of the stars rather than lulled to sleep but she seeks out the places only Maedhros lingers because she needs to tell him about what she found–both the corpses and their child who was chewing in the neck of her tunic as they slowly stirred awake.] Shhhh...

Maedhros I need to see you I think there might be trouble. [How could you be so tall and so hard to find? She decides to knock on his office door, presuming he still never slept when he ought to and hoping he was where he usually was in such cases.]

magnus bane | shadowhunters

[high_warlock]

[ It happened in book canon so let's make it happen in TV canon. Honestly he could take on any role. Ideal would be Rational to Co-Parent to unexpectedly Domestic but I'm game for anything. ]

Lozarian | Original | OTA

[epicnerd]

{OOC: He's a middle-aged elf who retired to become a librarian. He's never had a child himself, but he adores children and would jump at the chance to look after one for a while. OTA for gen baby shenanigans, M/M for anything shippy.}

[dragondisguised]

[I keep meaning to hit you up, haha. Maddie's an old hand at watching kids alongside her very human mother and I'd love some gen shenanigans. Madeline has several canon children over time we could have shenanigans with (as long as you like bitey little dragons) unless you'd rather stick to the meme and find a random one?]

[dreamflowers]

[One thing Jade did not expect to find when scrounging for food was a baby in a trash can. An actual, living, breathing, crying baby.]

No. No, this isn't happening.

[Oh, but it is.

[Rather than leaving the defenseless bundle of sobs and tantrums to the elements, however, Jade goes against her better judgement and plucks it up from the pile of garbage. It's been so long since she's held something this small and fragile in her arms, she almost forgets what it's like. But remembering what had happened when it had been her sister who was the crying infant she once held...

[Yeah, no. This is better suited for someone else. Someone who isn't some urchin living off of street scraps. With any luck, she'll find the next responsible-looking adult to pass the kid off to, then wipe her hands clean of the whole thing and make it someone else's problem.

[At any rate, Lozarian would likely fit the bill of "responsible-looking adult" just by catching her eye. Should she be that "irresponsible adult" by thrusting a crying child at a man she doesn't know, herself? Probably not. But here we are.]

Um, is this yours?

[Of course it's not. She hadn't yet gotten a good look, but baby seems vaguely human, from what Jade could tell. But if she's going to break the ice in order to relieve herself of this situation, then she may as well make an attempt somehow.]

[ooc: Hope this is okay! I'm totally fine with gen shenanigans. Jade would be best for the "reluctant" role if that wasn't obvious. I have her info in her journal if you're interested in her, otherwise I'm going in this blind, lol.]

Future Mai | Dragon Ball Super | OTA

[hopefulfuture]

[Definitely the responsible one / the rational one.]

Sakie Satou | Interviews with Monster Girls | OTA

[aphrodisiack]

[AUs, canon and cross canon welcome! Definitely the rational one with some good old awkward fluster on the side. Please help?

Sakie is a demi-human of the succubus variety meaning she has a natural aphrodisiac effect. Feel free to play with that or not, more info here on that.]

Reko Tabusame | Your Turn to Die | OTA

[musicaldemon]

[AUs, canon and cross canon welcome! Reko is the one losing her damn mind over this, thanks.]

Alex Price | InCryptid | OTA

[cryptoherpetology]

[ There's a nonzero chance of any infant left to his care will be venomous. Teething may be particularly challenging. ]

[apocalypsenah]

[ What do you do when it's 3 AM and you've just found a weird lizard baby? You take it to the weird lizard guy, of course. Alex is usually more of a daytime Bureau contact - and usually more in Abe's wheelhouse, what with all the intellectual jazz, but Abe's busy and it's not like he's got a lot of other options, out here.

Ones that'd at least guarantee the little guy's taken care of right, anyway. And maybe kept indoors until it's learned some basic manners, too. It's not outright hostile, all the awkward teething issues they've had so far on the trip across town aside, but the danger of letting it loose on its own would clearly not just be to the baby. It's a tough little thing, covered in scales, and quick, too.

Though it might finally be running out of steam, as readily as Hellboy manages to corral it just in time for Alex to finally answer the door. Hopefully he's expecting an armful of infant-sized, squirmy lizard, because that's what he's going to get thrust unceremoniously towards him, the second he shows his face. ]

Congrats, doc. It's a boy.

[ ...Well. Maybe. Alex's guess is bound to be better than his. But that's not quite as snappy. ]

Kurogiri/Shirakumo | My Hero Academia | ota

[capillatus]

[At any canon point, he makes an excellent parent (though a more responsible one as an adult). Open to canon, AUs, cross-canon, assumed cr.]

Asher Davies | OC Occult Detective | OTA

[examinedlife]

[OOC: Supernatural babies entirely a possibility. Character info and permissions in the journal.]

Din Djarin | The Mandalorian | OTA

[aliit]

[OOC: He's already got a kid so he'd be great to hit up for advice, or maybe help deal with another. Twice the fun?]

Bruce Wayne | DC Comics | OTA

[mythandman]

[Most of his kids are teenagers and adults, but he's got some experience with babies, too.]

Galadriel | The Rings of Power | ota

[stayingafloat]

[She's far more accustomed to act as a protector right now than with pure domesticity, but that's part of the fun.]

squalo superbi // katekyo hitman reborn!

[sharktrash]

[ he'll make that thing earn its keep in baby hunger games unless someone stops him ]

Birdie Lewis | OC | Vampire: The Masquerade | OTA

[acaseofyou]

[ info & permissions! she's not particularly maternal, but she can come in clutch with a good lullaby when needed. ]

Choose Your Own Adventure

[knoxwood]

So like what if, during the course of dumpster diving for personal information about a guy I thought was a Sabbat ghoul, I received for free a bonus human baby? Would that be wild or what?

Not hypothetical by the way.

tommy miller | tlou hbo

[accidentalcommunist]

[ who the hell would have a baby in the middle of an apocalypse.........oh. right. ]

Zack Fair | FF7 | ota

[zakkusu]

[All things considered, he'd be pretty good at taking care of a baby. Or at least be enthusiastic about it.]

Yang Xiao Long | RWBY | OTA but f/f leaning

[goldenflames]

[ Will absolutely dote over a baby. Probably the more responsible one. ]

Yondu Udonta | MCU

[yondu]

[It's his baby now! He's going to take it and raise it to be a space pirate and no one can stop him!]

Knox Harrington | Vampire the Masquerade Bloodlines | OTA

[knoxwood]

[Knox fits all categories but reckless.]

[heartbleeds]

[Look, he's not quite the reckless one, but he is the reluctant one so Knox is getting some texts.

Two of which are image texts, one a photo of a fucking baby with a note pinned to its little bib and one a close up of the note which apparently reads Vandal Cleaver, Please help her. Don't call the police. Her name is Anna.]

Terrible choice, honestly

And very rude, they didn't leave a return address so I can't say fuck no

Who would even trust me with this? Me???

[Look, he's not saying help, but this is a blatant cry for help. :(]

Mithiel | Tolkien (OC) | OTA

[tintila]