1. so he got the RA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. 2. don't drink and try to take a shower. i thought i was drowning. 3. i called him daddy. to his face. somewhat sober. what more could i do? 4. i specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
[Watts wasn’t too far behind her, having only needed enough time to gather a couple stacks of paper to shove in his bag to look over that evening before he left the station. So a minute or two past that half hour estimation, he was spotted strolling around the side of the building. Instead of looking particularly hyped up on caffeine, his expression was actually rather pensive. Not that this would seem out of the ordinary, Llewelyn had exhibited a tendency to get lost in his own head, often enough.
His ‘blue-screening’ did, however, become slightly more apparent as he stopped by the door. He offered Esther a slightly distracted smile, eyes darting intermittently from her to the hat box.]
Esther, hello! I trust you haven’t been waiting too long?
[Llewelyn took a moment or two to shuffle through his bag, and then his jacket (several scraps of paper and napkins escaping as he did so) for the keys to get into the building. It took him a few tries, and some awkward scrambles to catch other things that tried to escape his person in the search, but he finally found them and held open the door with a vague gesture for her to go on ahead.]
1. After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl.
2. It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out.
3. Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Helios is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
1. I mean I had no access to the Fade, what else was I supposed to do with my time? 2. My new life goal: I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon (PS: don't tell Shale) 3. So. I either have a problem or a really good solution...
1. I can't believe you woke up in bed with half a dozen nugs. Whenever I think you can't become more pathetic, you surprise me. 2. Your dog left a bone on my bedroll. 3. What happened last night?
1. I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin. 2. Do you know who these new recruits are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one. 3. I wish you would stop starting conversations with "we have a problem."
1. Just in case you saw my obituary in the paper, I thought I should let you know that it was a false alarm.
2. I’m not saying I don’t believe you, I’m just saying that I doubt that if they exist that a ghost haunting your apartment would be able to get their hands on the currency to pay half the rent.
3. I warned you that your jacket was a crime against fashion, and now you want me to bail you out of jail?
4. Is it bad that the most regular social obligation I’ve managed to keep up with is with the cat that stops by on the fire-escape outside my apartment at night?
5. Woke up on a park bench with a squirrel sitting on my chest staring at me as though my existence offended it.
6. Missfire and/or text him! (Assumed modern AU for texting purposes. All canon, cross canon and assumed CR welcome!)
k we both know this isn't about my jacket and that i could bust this jail open if i wanted consider me asking to be bailed out a favour way less embarrassing than me kicking your boss's ass
[ Life in Philly is not like life in New York, that much is true. Neal normally sticks out a bit, in attire and attitude, and how he'd come to be tentative friends with Ronald Fucking McDonald of all people is entirely a mystery (as much a mystery as indulging these strange whims that, by all rights, seem far, far below Neal's scope as an international conman).
In a many ways, Neal and Mac are very different, but a great intersection for them happens to be both enthusiasm and playfulness. ]
Don't look now, but I think you're being watched.
[ He's stealthy and finds Mac before Mac finds him. Neal is dressed more like Mac than like Neal — all part of the "disguise" — but he's added a pair of aviators to the black graphic tee and too-tight jeans, and he definitely shouldn't be wearing those sunglasses inside.
Neal tips his head toward a little old lady down the row, sorting polos and paying neither of them any mind. ]
Get the coat. I'll cover you.
[ But he is holding his hand out for that beer, thank you very much. It's part of the plan. ]
[Mac has zero capacity to be subtle when he looks around, so he basically turns in a full circle. If Neal's hoping for subtlety, he's talking to the wrong person. Thus far Mac appreciates Neal in that Neal's got a "good attitude", i.e. thinks elaborate, ill-guided schemes to get quick money or attention are entertaining. Mac's never really developed a sense of when he's being laughed with or at, so he doesn't think about it too hard.]
Nice shirt, dude. [He hands Neal a beer and then crunches his own empty can and chucks it somewhere in the aisle of dresses and skirts. The little old lady gives a look that's absolutely scathing, which Mac misses entirely, just like he completely doesn't notice as she decrepitly gets to her knees to try and pick it up.
He does, however, notice as another Goodwill employee - another little old lady, as if they come in bulk - who comes out of the back with the white shepherd's hook to get a dress hung up higher on the wall.]
Okay, new plan. I'm going to do a French accent and pretend I lost my little poodle dog. [Because all French people have poodles, and little old ladies love animals. The only concern Mac has about this is that he thinks he might be too muscular to pass for French.] Then, while I have them distracted, you run over, take the coat, and I knock this rack over so they can't follow us.
1) It is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on your door in 25 minutes
2) We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
3) Things you are not allowed to do while I'm gone: sell meowth on ebay, put meowth in freezer again, shave meowth like pyroar, dye meowth pink/blue, try to light meowth on fire to "wake them up from their nap" again
[ She spends the next few floors just watching him with one brow arched. A gentleman should, perhaps, also not leave it to the lady to make the first move after she has bluntly and repeatedly expressed interest. Especially when the gentleman is tall and the lady might have to climb him like a jungle gym to get things started.
Not that this lady in particular has much of a problem with that. ]
Ooookay, small talk it is! You got any, uh, hobbies?
[It doesn't seem very interesting, right? Oh well. He's not that interesting. But once he finishes his wine he hands the glass back over to her and takes a step forward.]
young rodrigue fraldarius; fe3h; short info in journal
2. don't drink and try to take a shower. i thought i was drowning.
3. i called him daddy. to his face. somewhat sober. what more could i do?
4. i specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Esther Moreau | OC | OTA
2. I'm literally looking at you, get off of the roof.
3. Drunk neighbour gave me a fucking heart attack, so I guess sleeping's not a thing that's occurring tonight.
4. You threw up on me, my car and slightly on my dog. So yeah, I'd say I've had better evenings.
5. Tequila is not, has never been nor ever will be your friend. When will you learn?
6. (For [personal profile] gadaboutdetective ) Hey - I've got something here for you.
7. I still maintain he broke his own jaw.
8. Text her!
3
There's always Netflix and beer.
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6 - Cont.
His ‘blue-screening’ did, however, become slightly more apparent as he stopped by the door. He offered Esther a slightly distracted smile, eyes darting intermittently from her to the hat box.]
Esther, hello! I trust you haven’t been waiting too long?
[Llewelyn took a moment or two to shuffle through his bag, and then his jacket (several scraps of paper and napkins escaping as he did so) for the keys to get into the building. It took him a few tries, and some awkward scrambles to catch other things that tried to escape his person in the search, but he finally found them and held open the door with a vague gesture for her to go on ahead.]
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laura matsuda | street fighter | ota
02. Right after I won the match, I sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
03. You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
04. why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
05. [ Or, text her! ]
3
Mine got so soaked I had to take it off.
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A little bit of both, now that I think about it.
Whizzer Brown - Falsettos - ota
1 • I woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
2 • I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
3 • If this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me I suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
4 • Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
5 • I am not talking to him I am not flirting with him I am not touching him I have the willpower of an ox
Ganymede | Greek mythology
2. It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out.
3. Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Helios is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Jupiter Jones | Jupiter Ascending
2. No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
3. so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
4. I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
5. Wildcard!
2. because.
definitely
XD
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Neria Surana (The Warden) | Dragon Age: Origins
2. My new life goal: I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon (PS: don't tell Shale)
3. So. I either have a problem or a really good solution...
Morrigan | Dragon Age: Origins | OTA
2. Your dog left a bone on my bedroll.
3. What happened last night?
Cassian Andor | Rogue One | OTA
2. Do you know who these new recruits are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
3. I wish you would stop starting conversations with "we have a problem."
3.
Re: 3.
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Llewelyn Watts | Murdoch Mysteries | OTA
1. Just in case you saw my obituary in the paper, I thought I should let you know that it was a false alarm.
2. I’m not saying I don’t believe you, I’m just saying that I doubt that if they exist that a ghost haunting your apartment would be able to get their hands on the currency to pay half the rent.
3. I warned you that your jacket was a crime against fashion, and now you want me to bail you out of jail?
4. Is it bad that the most regular social obligation I’ve managed to keep up with is with the cat that stops by on the fire-escape outside my apartment at night?
5. Woke up on a park bench with a squirrel sitting on my chest staring at me as though my existence offended it.
6. Missfire and/or text him!
(Assumed modern AU for texting purposes. All canon, cross canon and assumed CR welcome!)
3
and that i could bust this jail open if i wanted
consider me asking to be bailed out a favour
way less embarrassing than me kicking your boss's ass
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Jane Solo (r!63 AU) • Star Wars • OTA
1. i was having a really bad night
so i decided to steal a pumpkin
2. she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
3. so how does your latest bad decision feel?
4. if you sleep with him (her) again i’ll have you spayed
5. next time, please don't start an argument with me when you're topless. that's just not fair.
6. [ text her! ]
— therubyquartzman.
define “shoot things”
[ Details are important. But, yes, she’s on her way, and she’ll be there in under five unless she’s pulled over for speeding. ]
Re: — therubyquartzman.
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— not_yet_screaming.
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— ironyborn.
— scaledwolf, modern AU.
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IN CHARACTER USE OF FEELSY EYES 😏😏😏
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— protectoroftheskies.
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— flawedheart.
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5
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— scaledwolf, wall AU.
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— blossomingrose.
For morebetter —
[ Life in Philly is not like life in New York, that much is true. Neal normally sticks out a bit, in attire and attitude, and how he'd come to be tentative friends with Ronald Fucking McDonald of all people is entirely a mystery (as much a mystery as indulging these strange whims that, by all rights, seem far, far below Neal's scope as an international conman).
In a many ways, Neal and Mac are very different, but a great intersection for them happens to be both enthusiasm and playfulness. ]
Don't look now, but I think you're being watched.
[ He's stealthy and finds Mac before Mac finds him. Neal is dressed more like Mac than like Neal — all part of the "disguise" — but he's added a pair of aviators to the black graphic tee and too-tight jeans, and he definitely shouldn't be wearing those sunglasses inside.
Neal tips his head toward a little old lady down the row, sorting polos and paying neither of them any mind. ]
Get the coat. I'll cover you.
[ But he is holding his hand out for that beer, thank you very much. It's part of the plan. ]
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Nice shirt, dude. [He hands Neal a beer and then crunches his own empty can and chucks it somewhere in the aisle of dresses and skirts. The little old lady gives a look that's absolutely scathing, which Mac misses entirely, just like he completely doesn't notice as she decrepitly gets to her knees to try and pick it up.
He does, however, notice as another Goodwill employee - another little old lady, as if they come in bulk - who comes out of the back with the white shepherd's hook to get a dress hung up higher on the wall.]
Okay, new plan. I'm going to do a French accent and pretend I lost my little poodle dog. [Because all French people have poodles, and little old ladies love animals. The only concern Mac has about this is that he thinks he might be too muscular to pass for French.] Then, while I have them distracted, you run over, take the coat, and I knock this rack over so they can't follow us.
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Mipha | The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild | overflow
2) You said "It's alright, guys, I know I'm not really a turtle," and then tried to walk on the lake.
3) The woman at the trading post told me that I smell delicious, and asked if I wear cotton...then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy.
4) [text her!]
Lissa (1)
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Jill (3)
no last name huh
jill's a close friend no last name needed
oh ~family~ huh
of course !!
don't make me cry
:3c
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Laura Matsuda (1)
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Linkle (3)
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Sidon (3) ;o; don't get into a thank battle with me
I’LL FIGHT!!
LET'S GO 👊👊
(ง •̀_•́)ง
༼ง ◉_◉༽ง
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Nick Ramos (2)
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Nanu | Pokémon Sun & Moon (games) | overflow
2) We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
3) Things you are not allowed to do while I'm gone: sell meowth on ebay, put meowth in freezer again, shave meowth like pyroar, dye meowth pink/blue, try to light meowth on fire to "wake them up from their nap" again
4) [text him!]
Badou Nails (3)
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Laura Matsuda (2)
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Anabel (4)
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Hancock (2)
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Joshua Graham (1)
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Nick Valentine (4)
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Piper Wright (1)
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Daria (1)
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wild card
1/2 new phone who dis
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3!!!!
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for looking_sharp
Not that this lady in particular has much of a problem with that. ]
Ooookay, small talk it is! You got any, uh, hobbies?
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[It doesn't seem very interesting, right? Oh well. He's not that interesting. But once he finishes his wine he hands the glass back over to her and takes a step forward.]
You don't care about that.
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Aoi Asahina | Danganronpa | OTA
2. I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
3. good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
4. I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
5. (Text her!)
3