bakerstreet | The Domestic Meme

The Domestic Meme

RULES!
❧ Leave a comment with your character's name, fandom, and any preferences you have.
❧ When replying, RNG for a number between 1 and 15. The number corresponds to the scenario that you will play out in whatever way you want to.
❧ Go from there!

THE LIST!
01] baby
Suddenly, there's a new addition to your family! Are you expecting? Adopting? Struggling to find the perfect name for your child? Or maybe you're up at a ridiculous hour in the morning because they're crying like crazy.

02] just married
Congratulations! You and your loved (?) one are about to start a whole new life together! It's time for the honeymoon...

03] house hunting
Are you seeking out an apartment? A dream house? Or just any old place, as long as you're with your other? Make sure to weigh your options very carefully...

04] household chores
It's time to clean/cook/garden/take care of something! Do you work together, or does one of you hide until everything is done?

05] shopping
Whether it's for furniture, groceries, or something in between, shopping is something that everybody must do at some point in time! What varies is if they like it or not.

06] family vacation
WE'RE OFF TO DIDNEY WOOOOOOOOORL or wherever
... well, as long as the kids are happy, right...? You may not be happy (or maybe you are), but it's mainly about ~family bonding~.

07] romantic retreat
It's you and your loved one's anniversary, and you decide it's time to take some time off and take them somewhere nice, where you only have each other.

08] comfort
Is somebody sick in bed? Or perhaps they just had a bad day? Sometimes, a good breakfast in bed or a home-cooked meal can really lift the spirits! Or perhaps you want to try medicine, or laughter, or something else?

09] pet
Suddenly, you have another addition to the family! Is it a puppy? A kitty? A fierce dragon? Whatever it is, make sure to give it a name and to take good care of it!

10] holiday
Happy birthday/New Years/Christmas/Valentine's Day/whatever! It's a very special day that only comes once a year, so make it count!

11] argument
Oh, no, who left the stove on... Or maybe it's about why they were out late last night? Either way, there is a lot of tension today, and one of you may or may not be sleeping on the couch tonight.

12] making up
It's time to make amends for that fight/divorce/whatever you had before! After all, you love each other... right?

13] surprise, surprise
You are feeling rather loving tonight, so you want to remind the other person how much you cherish and appreciate them... if it's by something cute and adorable or hot and sexy is completely up to you.

14] proposal
~~SHUT UP THIS TOTALLY FITS~~ You've been with your other for what feels like forever, and finally you want to tie the knot with them. Will you go down on one knee before them, or get a little creative?

15] other
I know I'm forgetting like a bajillion and one different things here, so this is the option for that!

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"Oh please, you know it's true." Clint laughed, dropping an arm to fold it under his head, wiggling back into the pillows.

Maybe it would be nice to be a little more romantic, give her the occasional gift that wasn't a gun or something she could hurt someone with. Clint wasn't the kind of guy to bring her a stuffed toy, but it would be nice to see the reaction, a reaction that didn't involve her stuffing the toy where the sun doesn't shine.

"It's okay, just ignore me, let's get some more sleep yeah?" That's it, backtrack away from his awkward conversation, backtrack away from anythingt serious.

“Okay, it might be true,” she conceded and left it at that.

Once again he brushed off something that was clearly an issue with their relationship. Was that really how they worked? He bottled up all these desires and if he dared reveal any of them she just shot them down and he accepted it? Natasha frowned at the thought, not even bothering to hide it. He was the most important person in her life, but what if she was only holding him back? What if she was stifling him? She didn’t even touch on the thought they he might be better with someone else, someone more open and affectionate, because the idea of him with with someone else was enough to turn her stomach and make her heart ache.

Rolling off of him suddenly, she held the covers up to her chest as she sat up in bed, her mind running rapidly. What if he would be better off without her? She knew she wouldn’t be better without him, but could she ever be the woman he deserved?

He laughed, shrugging. "Yeah yeah I'm a sexy piece of ass." But there it was, the easiness gone so suddenly. When she rolled off his he instantly felt cold and lonely, which was stupid, really considering she was still next to him.

Clint frowned, sat up slowly and turned to look at her. "Hey, what's wrong?" He didn't really know what to do, reaching to touch her arm softly, try and make her look at him. She'd moved as if he was on fire, away from being burnt. "Tasha.."

He didn't want anybody else, nobody came close to Natasha, nobody ever would come close to what they had but he couldn't deny that he wanted more, couldn't deny that he wanted to be able to touch her, kiss her and not care what people thought. He was willing to give that dream up just for her. Always willing.

What could she possibly say? That she didn’t deserve him? That she didn’t know why he put up with her? What would would any of that matter if she wasn’t willing to give him up? No, this was not the time to talk about this, not now, not when she was leaving in less than twelve hours, not when she wouldn’t see him again for at least four month. She couldn’t bear the thought that they might fight and she’d end up leaving things much worse than she already expected them to be.

She couldn’t talk about their relationship, not now, but she could finally tell him what had been weighing on her mind all day. Clint wasn’t oblivious, he was much more tuned into her than anyone else, and she knew he suspected something. It was time to bite the bullet.

“I should have told you sooner but I was selfish, I just wanted to be with you one more night,” Natasha said. She had wanted him to be happy, for things to be normal, and she had gotten exactly what she had wanted. Since they’d entered her room things couldn’t have been more perfect.

Slowly she turned her face toward him, determined to meet his eyes when she finally broke the news. “I have a new mission, deep cover.” He would know what that meant. “I leave tomorrow... today,” she rectified, glancing at the clock. “It is suspected to last at least four months.”

Oh. Well he knew there was something wrong, all day he'd had that strange filling she was keeping something back from him but honestly, he didn't expect that.

He held her gaze through her words, but retracted his hand and left it sitting in his lap. Four months, too long. It was too long without her and he was already starting to think he'd loose the plot. Ever since the incident with Loki he'd needed her, not only to rebuild him but to keep his sanity. This was too long without contact, deep cover, he hated those fucking words.

He wasn't sure what to say, so he ran a hand through his ruffled hair and frowned slowly. "Wow well.." What could he say? That he wished she'd told him sooner? That he didn't want her to go away for that long because he was afraid he wouldn't be himself when she got back? That if she left him he'd fall apart? It sounded so weak even in the back of his mind.

"I can't believe.." He couldn't even speak, didn't know what to say that would leave this on a happy note. "I can't believe you didn't tell me sooner.." He'd said it, the most stupid thing he could come out with.

"I mean jesus fucking christ Nat, you've see me every day, you've had plenty of oppertunities to say something and you didn't." God was this what it felt like to feel your heart cracking? Because he didn't like it. He thought they were over this, he thought they could talk to each other about things like this. Obviously he was wrong.

When he pulled back his hand Natasha didn’t let it outwardly phase her, resisted the urge to grab his hand and hold it tight. She kept her expression neutral as he digested her words, giving him time to mull it over. She was still, a statue, even as he spoke, even as his words cut through her. She saw the pain in his eyes, inwardly cursing herself for causing it. She had known it wouldn’t be easy, that he wouldn’t take it well, but it still hurt.

“I should have told you,” she agreed, drawing her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. “I only found out two days ago, you know how SHIELD works.” She quickly cut of that line of explanation, it sounded too defensive, as if she was trying to excuse her actions. That was not what he needed right now, nor what he deserved. “But I should have told you right away, and I’m sorry I didn’t.”

It was only partially true. Any time she would have told him still would have hurt, but it would have been better to tell him as soon as she had known, to give him the time to accept it that she had had. Still, she couldn’t be completely regretful considering what they had shared tonight. Would the night have still played out the same? It would have been different, there would have been a lingering sadness hanging over them that she hadn’t wanted. She had wanted him to be carefree and happy, but was it worth the added pain in the end?

The fact she was so neutral made it harder to bare, she wasn't clutching for him, she didn't reach to take his hand, didn't move, just sat staring at him through that steady gaze. That hurt more than her holding back information.

"Why? Why didn't you tell me?" Was this going to be it? He put up with a lot, he gave up so much more than he would with any other woman but that was also his own problem. He'd been the one to fall in love with a woman who was set in her ways, who had her own ideals and kept everyone at arms length. He knew it wasn't personal, but he still couldn't help but feel hurt by it.

He laughed although it wasn't exactly happy, rubbed the heels of his hands in his eyes and tried to sort himself out, get his head straight. Four months without her was daunting, hell four hours without seeing her made him testy but four months, no contact. Shit. Just, shit.

"I don't know what to say." he shrugged, if she wanted to play stoic and silent then he could play too. He put his gameface on, he dulled the hurt in his heart and the pain in his head. He pretended not to care because otherwise he was certainly scared he'd fall apart right there in front of her.

The laugh tore through her more than any of his words could. She could see him shutting down, trying to adopt her stoic exterior and she knew she had erred in her methods. He didn’t need cold hard facts, he needed warmth and regret, but just as he tried to dull his hurt this way Natasha wasn’t very different. If she let her mask crack, if she let her own pain show, she wasn’t sure she could pull it all together again. It was self preservation more than anything.

If nothing else, though, he deserved an answer, and he deserved that answer to be the truth.

“I thought that...” she started to explain but her brow creased slightly and she turned her head, her gaze fixing on her knees. “I wanted today to be exactly how it was. I wanted to see you smile and hear you laugh and joke around like you always do.” Despite everything one corner of her lips curled up in the smallest of smiles as she thought of him like that. It faded just as quickly as it had appeared. “I told you I was selfish,” she continued, forcing herself to look at Clint again though her gaze was not as strong as it had been. “Those were the memories I wanted to take with me and I thought if you knew too soon it would hang over us, and...”

And what? Natasha wasn’t even sure how she had intended to finish the sentence so she let it trail off instead.

Clint wished he could be indifferent, wished he could roll her over and tell her it was okay, that he wasn't mad or upset. But it hurt, the fact that she'd denied him this, denied him being able to make the day more special and in some ways denied him the ability to mentally prepare himself before she left.

He shook his head at her words, sighed and managed to look over to her. "No. If you'd have told me, I could have planned ahead for you and myself. Made more of an effort but then it's always me making an effort." Another sigh, another long pause of him staring at nothing, another moment of rubbing hands over his face. "I guess I just wish you could have been less selfish considering it's me, not somebody who says and pretends they care but would push you into the line of fire to save their own skin."

He stood, moved to untangle his boxers from his jeans and cast them away, simply opting for just his jeans, dragging his shirt over his head as he looked back to her. "I'm not angry, I'm just, disappointed.. I guess." He also needed to get some air before he tripped over his words and say something he'd later regret.

"I need.." He trailed off, shaking his head. This would have been easier if not for the Loki incident, this would have been better if he still wasn't battling the demons inside his head. It wasn't just that, he was so lost in how much he loved her that it was just another blow.

”it's always me making an effort.”

Those words hurt more than any others he could have possibly chose, and the worst part was that they hurt so much because she knew they were true. As much as she needed him and cared about him, their relationship only truly worked because Clint made it work. He was the one that made all the sacrifices, who put his own wants aside, and unfortunately Natasha was only now waking up to this fact.

Turning her face away she squeezed her eyes closed and hugged her legs tighter. How could she have been so blind? Was her fear and uncertainty really that great she had allowed herself to look past everything he did for her, everything he gave up for her? He really did deserve better than her, someone who could be open and who was willing to give him every bit of her, everything she had.

Her head snapped around when he rose from the bed and she felt a quick tinge of panic. Hearing he was disappointed was another blow. Anger she would have preferred, she could have dealt with; disappointment ran much deeper. But what did any of it matter if he walked out? He was just going to leave, this was going to be it; the last time they talk in four months and it would be words that hurt each other. These weren’t the memories she wanted to take with her, but what had she really expected? How could she have been so stupid?

“Clint, please,” her voice cracked at the plea, her mask finally coming apart. Throwing off the covers she crawled across the bed and grabbed for his hand. “Please don’t leave it like this.”

He turned slowly at the tone of her voice, jesus if her words hadn't come out like that he'd have kept walking, but it froze him in his tracks, her fingers gripping his and jesus he didn't know what to do. Part of him wanted to crawl back to her, but that's all he ever did, tried to make her happy. The other part of him wanted to go find a solitary corner somewhere just to think, head onto the roof to take in the sights and work out just what the fuck he was going to do.

"You've kinda made your own bed here Tasha." His features did soften as he gripped her hand in his. "I'm lost on this one, I just need to take a break, get some air, think things through." He nodded, kneeling slowly at the foot of the bed, eyes locked on her but hazy, he couldn't decide if he wanted to focus on her or see through her, just because he really didn't know what to do or what else he could say.

Her voice though, god, he hadn't heard her voice break like that for years and the last time it had it had fallen from the lips of a girl he was about to kill.

"Natasha I.." love you "I need to get some air." He nodded, leaning to press lips quickly to her forehead before he was moving. He had to get out, the air was suffocating him and jesus he couldn't stand being in the same room as her and hiding from the fact he couldn't manage to spit out what he actually meant.

His words were harsh at first but his expression softened and he squeezed her hand so she let herself hope. She tried to be understanding, he just needed space to think, but she couldn’t help the sinking feeling in her stomach that if she let him walk out of here tonight he wouldn’t be back.

When he knelt before her she gripped his hand desperately, thinking that maybe he would stay, maybe she could convince him to stay, but she could see it in his eyes, that he was having a hard time even to look at her right now. No, she couldn’t convince him to stay, she wouldn’t, because that would involve one of two things: she would either have to use the skills she swore she would never use on him, or she would have lay her heart completely open. The first she would not do, the second she couldn’t, not without time to reflect herself.

“Clint...” she spoke his name quietly, her eyes closing tightly as he pressed his lips to her forehead. She wanted to throw her arms around him, to pull him close and kiss away all his pain but he was already moving away and she felt frozen, leaden. She couldn’t move, couldn’t speak, couldn’t even watch him leave. Only when he was gone did she eventually force herself to crawl back into the bed, pull the covers over her and bury her face in the pillow he had vacated. It still smelled like him so she drew it close to her, wrapping her arms around it and just breathing him in.

So it was longer then the ten minutes he thought he needed. 30 minutes of roaming around the roof, staring out at the sky and freezing his ass off. But he still returned, still ended up on her floor wandering back towards her bedroom and shedding his shirt along the way.

It hadn't helped him clear his head or think, he couldn't stop it, he couldn't stop her from going so he just had to accept it. It's why he watched her for a few seconds before sitting on the edge of her bed, scrubbing a hand over his face.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have.." Apologising as usual but honestly? He didn't want to end things like this, not with four months ahead of them. He understood why she hadn't told him, but understanding her reasons didn't help. If the roles were reversed he'd have told her, it would have hurt him but he'd have mentioned it and made sure that the last couple of days together were enough to keep him satisfied.

Thirty minutes felt like hours to Natasha and she had started to truly fear that he wasn’t coming back, that he wouldn’t be there to see her off tomorrow and that the last image she would have of him for the next four months was that of his back, shoulders sagging, as he walked out on her.

It would serve her right, she had made a real mess of everything. She hadn’t thought through how this would really effect him, had only been thinking of herself. She should have told him the moment she found out, should have given him the same time she had had to come to grips with it. Even that hadn’t been enough time for her, so what did she expect from him? She had used him so poorly and all he had ever done was be there for her whenever she needed him, and cared more about her than anyone else ever had.

She lay silently in the room, her breathing uneven, but she didn’t cry; the Black Widow didn’t cry, even when her heart was aching. After what felt like hours she heard the soft sound of the elevator stopping on her floor, unaware she had been listening so closely, but she didn’t dare hope, not until she heard him pad into the room, not until she felt the bed shift slightly under his weight.

Slowly pushing herself up to sit, she set the pillow aside and watched him a moment, unsure what to do. Would he pull away if she touched him? She had to risk it. Crawling out from beneath the covers she moved to sit behind him, just watching his back, the subtle movements when he breathed.

“Don’t apologise,” she said, hating herself a little more that he felt the need to apologise when it had all been her fault. “You were right about everything. I should have told you, but I... I made a mess of everything.” She leaned forward enough so that her forehead rested between his shoulder blades, her whole body tense as she waited for him to pull away.

He reached around, finding her leg and drawing his fingers along her skin. Clint would forget about it, he had to because if he didn't he was afraid of how this would end. They were partners even before they ventured down this path, he couldn't put that on the line even if his head was telling him he was flogging a dead horse, his heart well, she'd stolen that a long time ago.

"It's okay, we're okay" He was glad she couldn't see his face, his eyes were shut too tight he was seeing stars but he kept his body loose, not wanting to make the rest of the night go anymore south than it already had. But still, he pulled away slowly to stand, shucking his jeans down his legs and moving back to her bed, back between the sheets. "Come on, you need some sleep otherwise It'll be a long day tomorrow." His heart wasn't in the words, but still he put on a brave face and managed a smile that didn't look forced.

Natasha let out a sigh of relief at his touch, turning her face to rest her cheek against his back. It was okay, they were okay; she repeated the words silently to herself. They were lies, of course, but she would take them for now. They weren’t okay, she knew that, but she had how that they would be.

She sat back when he stood up, watching as he discarded his jeans and slid back between the sheets. His voice was dull, his smile lacking, but she didn’t hesitate to climb in beside him again and pull the covers up over them. Maybe she was pushing it, pushing him, but she curled up against his side, just needing to feel him next to her. Draping an arm over him she couldn’t keep herself from placing a soft kiss on his chest. She knew he was right, knew she should sleep, but she didn’t want to waste this time together sleeping. She could sleep on the plane.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

As soon as she climbed next to him he wrapped an arm around her, eager to get back the warmth they'd lost earlier, when all this began.

She thanked him and he had to stop himself from sighing, instead he pulled her closer, breathing her in, wrapped up in her smell and pretended he was happy. "We're alright, just come back in one piece okay? That's the only thing I want from you."

He clung onto her, jesus if he lost her, if she didn't come back what would he do? Sure they'd been apart from each other before but this? This was so different and he couldn't help but think about what life would be like without her. Cold, miserable and certainly not worth sticking around for.

She wanted to say more, wanted him to know how grateful she was he had come back, how grateful she was for him, but all that mattered for a moment was that he returned her embrace and she let herself sink into him.

“I will,” she agreed to his request. It was a promise she knew she shouldn’t make, one she couldn’t possibly know if she could keep or not, but she sure as hell planned on coming back to him, and she was more determined than ever to do just that.

Nuzzling her face against his chest she kissed him again. Holding him tighter she draped one leg over his and pressed herself closer as he clung to her. “I will always come back to you.”

He smiled slowly, stroking a hand up her back, dancing fingers along her spine, memorising everything because four months was a long time to be away from each other, from someone you saw everyday. He wouldn't just miss this, but their vocal conversations and the silent ones, the way she smiled, her teasing, her sarcastic digs. Everything.

Her last words warmed him slightly, but it was still a far cry from any declaration of love. But what did he expect? Maybe for her to realise how crazy he was about her. "Good, because I don't know what I'd do without you."

He leaned down, catching her lips softly, snuggling back into the pillows and pulling her back on top of him just like their earlier position. "Now sleep time."

Clint’s words made her heart skip but she didn’t get chance to reply, whether to assure him he would never have to find out or to return the sentiment before he was kissing her and pulling her back on top of him like a human blanket. She didn’t protest; she had wanted to be as close to him as possible and she couldn’t get much closer than this.

Settling against him Natasha pillowed her head right over his heart and let herself relax. The emotional roller coaster had exhausted her and she only hummed in response when he said it was time to sleep.

How had she become so lucky? All the horrible things she had done in her life, so many that she wasn’t sure there were enough years left to make up for them all, what had she possibly done to deserve him? She didn’t know what she would do without him either, that point had been driven home when Loki had taken him from her. For those few long, agonizing days her thoughts had been consumed only by thoughts of Clint and of getting him back. He had never strayed far from her mind, even with everything else going on around her. It was then that she had realised how much he meant to her, but it was only now she was realising what it truly meant to give herself completely to someone else. She knew he had done that for her, but there was a part of her that was still holding back.

The fact that she would have to work on that were the last thoughts to pass through her mind before she drifted off to sleep.

Lucky would have been a word to describe himself. She was beautiful and could have had any man dropping to her knees and kissing the ground she walked on. But here they were with Natasha on his chest. Maybe he should just be thankful that she wanted him in this capacity instead of pushing her and feeling sorry for himself.

He felt her breathing slow, watched her as she fell asleep and half smiled. No he was lucky and he just had to keep reminding himself of that, plus if he kept pushing she always had that option of finding someone who didn't want anything more than this casual, secretive deal.

He sighed softly, tried to push it all out his mind and after ten minutes of watching her breath he followed suit and didn't move until morning when he woke up with a full bladder and Natasha still perched on top of him.

Maybe he could subtly roll her off? Escape from under her and return to her warmth when he'd finished sorting his problem. He tried, slowly moving her limbs and carfully rolling them until she was next to him with one of his arms trapped under her. Well done Clint. Congratulations.

She hadn’t meant to fall asleep. She had wanted to stay awake and memorise the sound of his breathing, the rhythm of his heartbeat, but it was these exact things that had lulled her into such a state of tranquility it had been impossible to resist. She slept soundly for several hours until she felt herself being jostled, her body being moved around without her doing the moving.

Morning. Never had that word been so detestable than it was right now. With morning brought separation and she just wasn’t ready to let him go, not yet. Wrapping her arms around him, she nuzzled her face in his chest.

“Not morning yet,” she mumbled, trying to cling to the remnants of sleep a little longer, her mind not quite alert yet. Nobody else had ever had the privilege of seeing her this way, and if Clint even thought of telling anyone she acted like this he would regret it tremendously.

Precious. He could almost call her precious in the morning. Nobody would believe him even if he told, and he was quite happy keeping this side of her all to himself. But he really did need to to the bathroom, even though she was currently tangled back around him like twine.

"Sweetheart, I gotta pee" He mumbled, voice hazy with the last slithers of sleep. Clint smiled lazily, stroking a hand through her hair before no, he really needed to move before something very bad happened. He managed to roll her away from him, escape her arms and stmble from her bed, scratching the back of his head, he did lean down to press a kiss in her hair though.

"I'll be back, keep that spot warm." And off he headed to relieve himself, all that wine really did him no good.

The words reached her ears and Natasha barely held back a laugh. It was tempting to curl around him tighter just to see how frantic he would get but she decided that might be a very bad idea, not that she helped him get free either. “Hurry back,” she murmured, even letting him get away with calling her ‘sweetheart’ without mention.

Sprawling out on her stomach in the centre of the bed she tried to keep herself from checking the clock, tried to slip back to a lazy half sleep but now Clint had inadvertently planted a seed in her mind and despite her ridiculously good bladder now she had to go too.

Grumbling to herself she pushed out of bed and winced as she took that first step. Christ, she was sore and walking certainly wasn’t helping. Limping over to the bathroom she leaned against the doorframe in her alltogether and waited for him to open the door.

That was better, so much better now he didn't have that damn pressure, yeah too much information maybe. He took a moment, scrubbing his hands, drying them slowly, taking a look at himself in her mirror and sighing.

Luckily he didn't jump as he opened the door and found himself face to face with Natasha, jesus she was like a shadow. "You vacated the nest, now it's gonna be all cold." He smirked, moving out of the way because she'd obviously got up with the same problem he had. Hey, everyone had to go right.

Moving back to the bed, boxers slung too low on his hips as he yawned and climbed back between the sheets, back to the cooling spot in the middle of the bed.

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