A sledgehammer in the computer

[a_pirate_meant_to_be]

THE HELP DESK MEME


Have you tried shoving it up your arse?

No man is an island. Sometimes, you really, really need help on something that none of your friends can help with. In times like this, it's time to turn to a help line! Sadly, just because you call a HELP line doesn't necessarily mean you're going to get a helpful PERSON. Likewise, whether you realize it or not, you may be subjecting the person on the other end of the line to some amazingly stupid lines of inquiry.

Of course, it could all just go normally. But when has THAT ever made for interesting RP?

Standard meme rules here:

1. Post your upper level. Note what type of help line it is in your title, NOT your canon/character name.
2. People who tag in are calling into your help line.
3. Hilarity. Maybe.

Comments

[a_pirate_meant_to_be]

I see, I see. Have you been able to locate the bizarrely arbitrary yet complicated method of neutralizing said fish god's power? If not, I can try to locate said Fish God in the Directory of Eldritch Doom Monsters.

[eldritchwheelies]

Oh goddamn it.

Isaac! I told you this wasn't a 'dies if you kill it' situation but nooooo.

Sorry, had to tell off a MAN OF ADVENTURE type for thinking fire and the application of katana to face was sufficient. Could you look it up for me? I could sneak into the forbidden section of the library but this is faster and doesn't involve a ticket to Wizard Detention.

[a_pirate_meant_to_be]

Okay, let's just pull it up on the ol' Voodoo Box...

[The sound of keyboard tapping.]

Okay, is the fish god oceanic or freshwater in origin?

[eldritchwheelies]

Oceanic. The Pacific if that helps. Kind of on an island here.

[a_pirate_meant_to_be]

Ooh, Pacific Islands. Never been. Anyway...

[More typing.]

Would you say they're definitely FISH-fish like in appearance, or more sharky, or more of a weird unholy amalgam of a bunch of different aquatic animals?

[eldritchwheelies]

Uh hang on.

Hey Dex were they fishy or more sharky?


Okay cool.

Yeah we were definitely dealing with Great White Sharkmans.