the P H O N E H E L L meme

[m3m3]

Cell phones, eh? Sometimes they make your life easier, and sometimes they make it harder.



#1: Texts From Last Night
#2: Damn you, Autocorrect
#3: Recipient Misfire
#4: Mix & Match
#5: Wildcard

Option One:
Texts From Last Night
You know the drill: RNG, or pick one that tickles your fancy. Post blank and let others text you about their night, or send out a mass text for anyone to reply to by posting a TFLN when you tag the post.

Option Two:
Damn You Autocorrect
We've all done it. Either sit and wait for other people's mistakes to come to you with a blank tag, or take the bull by the horns and make the first move mistake by posting an autocorrect error when you tag the post.

Option Three:
Recipient Misfire
It's just so easy to hit the wrong name in your phone, isn't it? Embarrassment city! ...But is that better or worse than manually inputting the number incorrectly and texting a complete stranger by mistake?

Option Four:
Mix & Match!
Let autocorrect fuck up the TFLN you're sending to the wrong person. Go nuts!

Option Five:
Do Whatever The Fuck You Want
You know what, if none of these ideas are good enough for you, your ass can come up with something else. I don't even care.

Comments

[therealgenius]

Probably. He knows you've been, like, my hero since I knew what that was.

I'm not with him, but if I had to make a guess? Yes. He's drunk, too. Perpetually drunk.

[pursuitofcappiness]

It's nice to meet a fan, but I'm going to have to change this number.

...What name did Stark put me in your phone as?

[therealgenius]

What? No. I'll just delete you. I'm not going to track you down with it or anything. Plus, there's paperwork and dealing with customer service and it's an icky road to go down and nope.

Captain Tightpants.

[pursuitofcappiness]

He's not very subtle, is he?

I'm sorry, on his behalf.

[therealgenius]

Sorry for him why? He's a grown-ass man, no one needs to "apologize" for him.

[pursuitofcappiness]

Oh. So he didn't get drunk, steal your phone, and put me on it as Captain Tightpants?

Sorry, that's what I thought happened.

[therealgenius]

Maybe that's what he did. Maybe he just put it in there at random, sans being drunk. Either way--none of that is the point--he's not a kid. No one needs to apologize "for" him. He's perfectly capable of doing that himself.

[pursuitofcappiness]

Does he?

[therealgenius]

He doesn't often, no. Not that I've experienced. But that doesn't mean talking about him like he's some sort of petulant child is going to do anything for him. It's just condescending.

[pursuitofcappiness]

Sorry to offend.

[therealgenius]

I'm not offended.

Well, now? I'm kind of offended on HIS behalf, which is like you were talking about apologizing for him? But it's not the same, I don't think. I'm just kind of aggravated that everyone acts like they have to be his babysitter. It aggravates him, sure, but it kind of aggravates me, too, because it aggravates him.

It's just an aggravating circle. I didn't mean to shit on you about it, Captain Rogers.

[pursuitofcappiness]

Why don't we just stop talking about Stark?

I would like my name removed from your phone, though. It's nothing personal. I just don't even know you.

[therealgenius]

Sounds like a good idea, yep.

Already have, sir. You're just showing up as numbers now.

[Pray you, Steve, do not assume those numbers are gobbledygook. They are now in the Rolodex of Justin Hammer's numerical sequences to never forget, right between his Social Security Number and the Oval Office's private line. FYI.]

[pursuitofcappiness]

Great.

Thanks. And stay on your side.

[therealgenius]

...what side?

[pursuitofcappiness]

You said you were on your side.

[therealgenius]

OH. Hah. I thought you meant, like...a division. Another side. Not like a Pythagorean Theorem to find the side lengths of right triangles (which is, of course, a^2 + b^2 = c^2)—like, there's the other side of the park. You stay on that side with all the dogs.

A different place? That sort of side.

[pursuitofcappiness]

You're in a park?

[therealgenius]

No. I'm in DC, actually. Job stuff. I was drawing a comparison using different areas of a park.

I didn't think you meant the side of my BODY, I thought you were--you know. I should go? I should. I have DOD stuff in the morning.

[pursuitofcappiness]

No, just, lie on your side, Mr. Hammer. Get some rest.

1/3

[therealgenius]

Yeah, you too.

[therealgenius]

Get some rest, I mean. Not getting on your side. Beca

[therealgenius]

Have a good week.

[pursuitofcappiness]

You too.