ONE... TWO... THREE... FIGHT.

[memety]

THE FIGHT MEME



STEP 1: Post a character, and this just in! No previous cr needed. And oh hey, you want to write in your scenario if blank comments annoy the fuck out of you.
STEP 2: Wait for a reply
STEP 3: Fight!

And if you like the RNG to pick your fight, here's a few options:

ROUND 1: VERBAL
Not all fights are physical. Maybe you're just really mad and really loud.

ROUND 2: WUSSY
This is possibly the dumbest limp-wristed flail fight you've ever been involved in.

ROUND 3: WITS
Because why would you beat someone into the ground when you can humiliate them with your massive intellect instead?

ROUND 4: SPARRING
You're fighting to improve. Whether you know your partner or whether you've just met, you can be pretty sure you're walking away from this one.

ROUND 5: GRUDGE MATCH
Your hated rival is in town. It's time for a rematch.

ROUND 6: BAR FIGHT
Welcome to the mother of all drunken brawls.

ROUND 7: YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS!
Maybe your opponent is your friend/sibling/love/other cherished person. Maybe you're a pacifist. Either way, you're in this fight, but you really don't want to be.

ROUND 8: TO THE DEATH
This is it. Too much has happened for this to be anything but a fight to the end. Only one of you is walking away from this.

ROUND 9: OBLIGATORY SMUT OPTION
Hate sex is the best. And some people like smut and some do not.

ROUND 10: RANDOM
Your very own personalized scenario.

Comments

John Watson || BBC Sherlock

[you_dont_work_alone]

[Dingding! It's on!]

[Rolls up sleeves! // RNG says 1, but we all know it'll turn into a 3 at some point.]

[annoyingdick]

[Sherlock watches John carefully as he gets ready for a date, and while he normally wouldn't pay him any mind, today he feels rather irritated, for some reason]

I do not understand why you continue to pursue women, when it's obvious that it will amount to nothing, in the long run.

woo!

[you_dont_work_alone]

[John was standing at the mirror fixing his tie, but stops at the remark and frowns a bit.]

Are you saying I should give up and become a monk? Maybe I'll move to a monastery in the mountains.

[annoyingdick]

You are far too lecherous to become a monk. But yes, you should give up.

[you_dont_work_alone]

I'm not lecherous, Sherlock. This is what normal people do.

They go on dates and meet people. Not sulk in their flat all day shooting up walls.

[He fusses with his tie again.]

Why do you say it'll amount to nothing?

[annoyingdick]

Dating sounds like a waste of time, energy, and resources. [He scoffs, then gives John a rather scornful once-over.]

You have tried to secure yourself a mate for almost as long as we have been living together, and your longest relationship has not lasted longer than a fortnight, at best. Obviously, you are not a suitable mate, if so many women have rejected you.

[you_dont_work_alone]

[He laughs.]

There's nothing wrong with me.

If you weren't such a difficult flatmate, I think they'd stick around longer.

[Though really, John contributed to the ending of those relationships, too. He couldn't blame Sherlock for all of it. He put his friend above his girlfriends and that was his choice.]

[annoyingdick]

[Sherlock huffs out his nose] I am not to blame here. You are the one dating those horrid, dull women.

[He flops around on the sofa until he's facing the back of it, pointedly not looking at John. He makes a few noises, and then mutters to himself] And your jumpers certainly do not help your situation.

[you_dont_work_alone]

I heard that.

[There is nothing wrong with his jumpers. Hrmph.]

If you think they're so horrid, then what kind of woman do you suggest I date?

[annoyingdick]

[Tell that to his retinas, which seem to be burning off. If that doesn't make the case, Do we need to bring up the Christmas jumper, John?]

I suggest you don't date at all. Perhaps, we could solve more cases, if you didn't spend so much time on such useless activities.

[you_dont_work_alone]

[That Christmas jumper was a gift. No it wasn't.]

We solve plenty of cases. My personal life is not interfering with the work.

[annoyingdick]

Yes, it is. [You having a personal life annoys him. That directly interferes with his job. Don't you know you are supposed to entertain him and wait on him hand and foot? No? Well, you know now. Hmph.]

[you_dont_work_alone]

How is it interfering? I do everything you ask of me.

[The least Sherlock can do is let him have a life now and again.]

Look, I can't stand here and argue with you. I'm going to be late.

[annoyingdick]

[Sherlock sighs. And really sighs; It's the kind of gesture that almost screams 'John, you are being an idiot', and while he didn't want to do this, he didn't see other choice out of it]

The only reason that woman is pursuing you, is because she believes that you will support her wishes of a lavish lifestyle. She does not know that your salary is nowhere close what it should be for someone of your profession, and that you receive a pension that barely covers your meals. She is also seeing other suitors behind your back; Two, specifically: a lawyer and an architect. She does not plan on ending those relationships, even if she 'settles down' with you.

[you_dont_work_alone]

[That stops John in his tracks. He doesn't want to believe it, but he knows how good Sherlock is. John frowns, looking agitated.]

Goodnight, Sherlock.

[He's heading for the door. Of all the nerve. And yet.. now he was thinking about it. When he goes to meet his date, things don't go very well with all of those thoughts in his head.

And John comes slinking back into the flat half an hour later looking dismal. He hopes Sherlock has gone to his room or something, but John's probably not that lucky.]

[annoyingdick]

[In all honesty, Sherlock is surprised that John basically ignored him, and decided to still go out with this woman despite his warnings. You can almost see him look baffled for a second, but he quickly shakes that off, dropping back down to the couch and curling up on it.

And when John returns, Sherlock hasn't moved a single millimeter. Not even a hair. The machine has gone on Stand By mode.]

[you_dont_work_alone]

[John spots Sherlock on the couch. He turns around and removes his coat to hang it up by the door.]

Not a word.

[He doesn't want to hear the I-told-you-so's.]

[annoyingdick]

[Don't worry, he won't say anything. He's pretty offended at you ignoring him earlier, so he actually hopes that your date went horrible (kind of). Which, judging by the time, it probably did.]

[you_dont_work_alone]

[Definitely not good. John takes a seat in his chair and sighs. He just sits there quietly for awhile. Damnit.]

[annoyingdick]

[By the by, Sherlock still hasn't moved. And he won't until you apologise say something. He is more than willing to stay there all night, and even all morning. And a day or two after that. You know food is not a problem for him.]

…

[you_dont_work_alone]

[John sighs and rubs his fingers against his forehead.]

You were right about her.

[That's sort of like an apology.]

[annoyingdick]

[That's not an apology. That's simply acknowledgement. Besides, whenever he messes up, John near damn forces him to grovel. You're not getting away that easily, and he starts his little revenge with a very pointed and almost resounding]

Obviously.

[you_dont_work_alone]

[John taps his fingers against the arm of his chair.]

You were right and I was wrong.

[He's not sure he should have to apologize for. Sherlock was the one acting jealous.]

But I'm not going to stop dating.

[annoyingdick]

[It's not jealousy he's feeling. Honestly, must you always try to pair him up with some odd definition of sentiment?

Not jealous. He simply feels some sort of second hand embarrassment, every time you are kicked to the curb by these women. He's trying to avoid that. Moron.]

Fine.

[you_dont_work_alone]

[John stares at Sherlock for a few seconds and then nods. He gets up from his chair and goes into the kitchen to make some tea.]