bakerstreet

1) Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??

2) Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends.

3) We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!

4) Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM

5) Or text her!

didn't keep them off some others though
Or did you think I'd forget that part?

You kept refilling my glass and telling me it's not a real party if everyone isn't drinking. I got the feeling you thought it was rude to finish my drink.

Prompto.

No.

1. I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life decisions and deep-seated self-loathing?

2. No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with an honest-to-gods elf. He hasn't gotten any of my Keebler jokes.

3. I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in my basement like the shawshank redemption

4. there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.

5. Her sixteen year old sidekick just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the Watchtower bathroom. Fuck teenagers with morals.

Did you feel out of place at first? Not the real obvious ways but
All the time, I mean?

You aren't going anywhere. You're dealing with this just like the rest of us.

First things first I need you to know that if you show this conversation to anyone you'll be giving the Luggage an early supper

obviously you weren't eating them so i took them to a good home

is it still hot broth at least?

If there are things you don't feel comfortable telling me or any of your superiors, we have an independent counsellor on site.

( or: time to pull back a little. )

You sound just like Scientia. Though there's nothing wrong with eating tuna. I don't think there is.

could have
in my defense i thought you were blacked out

Hey, it wasn't my fault! You need to be more careful where you're standing!

Thx for the warning?

1. So in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.

2. It was the cape. I can’t control myself when I wear a cape.

3. Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?

4. There was a miscommunication in the phrase 'would you like to see my weapon' that ended an otherwise pleasant conversation.