Little Steps

[knitsock]

little steps No matter how much they care for the other person and want to be with them, some people simply can't dive head first into relationships. Little things that form intimacy and romance, little acts we take for granted - being close, holding hands, kissing, showing affection in public - they won't or can't do...at least not right off the bat. Something in their past, their experiences, their trauma, or even their personality holds them back. For both them and the person they're "dating," as it were, this can lead to a frustrating experience. Still, steps can be taken towards letting the walls fall down. Little, tiny steps, but those can mean the world all the same. The People One With the help of a partner, one person warms up. Two Both sides of this couple are learning how to be in a relationship and to be open. The Actions Talking → A relationship can't exist if there's not some communication, so either learn to use your words or become so close you can speak without them. Spending Time → Even such mundane occurrences as watching TV or cooking together is new ground. Touching → You might just find you enjoy reaching out and touching them. Kissing → Another kind of touch, when you think about it. Cuddling → ...at least they're warm and, hopefully, soft. Sleeping → You're at your absolute weakest when you're asleep. It shows trust to doze off around this person. Public Display → It's one thing to be in love in private, but showing you care in public is a different story. Kind Words → Three little words (more or less) are all it takes. Why, then, are they so hard to get out? Sex → The ultimate stumbling block to some. To be laid blissfully bare is to truly let your guard down.

Comments

[reclaimedtime]

That doesn't even sound like anything!

[ Oh. Right. Kanan's face, she might need it. Mari'll let up... a bit. ]

Now do it properly!

[rebreathe]

[s q u i n t.

Suddenly reminded of the Oharas' many, many pets. Is this how Mari housetrains them...]

I love you.

[Contrary to popular (mis)belief, the prior attempt did not make the current one less stressful at all.]

[reclaimedtime]

[ Well, you can be sure none of Mari's actual dolphins ever gave her half this much grief. It's worth it, though, if the thousand-watt intensity with which her face lights up is any indication. ]

Really, really?

[ It's not that she needs the reassurance, but. Indulge her? ]

[rebreathe]

Really.

[A single word, and she feels as if she has reached a lifetime's quota of embarrassment. And commitment. And plenty else which falls under the umbrella of complicated feelings in general. But if it means having Mari smile at her like this, it's alright -- better than alright.]

I was waiting for a more suitable time and place to tell you, but. [Yeah.]

[reclaimedtime]

Hee!

[ That single word, amazingly, makes Mari's grin grow even bigger. She releases her hold on Kanan's face in full, so she can instead wrap her arms around her again -- they'll both need it for support, as she lets her body fall forward against Kanan. ]

Geez, like when? You know it's not some big secret, right?

[rebreathe]

It's not, huh. [As long as she didn't legitimize the declaration by putting it across in unequivocal terms, though, they could deny it, or rather, Mari could always deny it were she thus inclined. Mari always had the option, the chance, to stop her if she so wished.

Not anymore.]

I still think my birthday would've been good. [A birthday. Not necessarily the birthday next year.]

[reclaimedtime]

[ This again... That's the thing about Kanan logic, it's every bit as befuddling the second time around. And for Mari to not get it, that's gotta be, like, pretty befuddling. ] I was thinking this since earlier, but what kind of person confesses on their own birthday? A confession is basically a gift, right, so if anything you should've given it on my birthday! Duh!

[rebreathe]

I didn't want to scare you off. Those are... [She fidgets with the ends of Mari's hair, a tic cultivated unwittingly ever since she had once again gotten used to holding Mari in her arms on a regular basis. Occupying her hands helps her think.] Important words. Not to be used lightly.

Telling you on your birthday would put you on the spot.

[And surely Mari understands why she won't have that.]

[reclaimedtime]

Huhhh... [ Mari blinks slowly, glance flickering between Kanan's face and the fingers twirling her hair.

Really? That's why?

Her brow pinches. ]

You're so weird, Kanan. [ It's chiding, but soft. ] Did you think there's any way I wouldn't want to hear it? I mean... [ Her hold around her tightens a moment. ] Would you hug someone you don't like? [ One hand lets go then, taking hold of Kanan's own, lacing their fingers together to still the fidgeting. ] Or hold hands with someone you don't like? Or...

[ Lowering her head, Mari gently presses her lips over Kanan's knuckles. ] Kiss someone you don't like?

[rebreathe]

[She's chuckling when she makes use of their reversed height difference to kiss the wrinkle between Mari's brows, appeasing, willing it to smooth out.

Of course Mari would find the most straightforward solution.]

Coming from you? Takes one to know one, weirdo.

Have I not been showing enough interest in you to your satisfaction? Hmm?

[reclaimedtime]

[ Hmph! It's not about that, and Mari knows Kanan knows it. She sticks out her tongue. ]

Gee, I dunno! But if you keep interrupting our dates to talk to other girls like that, your Mari'll start getting lonely.

[rebreathe]

[She has to concede, when it's put this way...]

A problem, then.

In that case, how would my Mari [Her Mari. Another thing she can happily get used to.] wish to be compensated for her trouble?

[reclaimedtime]

[ Oh. Oh, that is nice. She likes it even better when Kanan says it. It makes her ears all warm again.

This is a problem, though. Mari's so happy right now that she can't think of anything to ask. Of course, such a precious opportunity is not to be wasted! She just needs a minute, is all. ]

Let's see, let's see... mmmmmn...

Well, to start off with, how about--! Tell me "I love you, I'm in love with you" one hundred times over.

[ There we go! ☆ ]

[rebreathe]

[This face.

Her immediate response was a solid no. Tongue twisters have nothing on saying that for one hundred times.

On second thought, it's an opportunity for her, too --]

Okay.

I'll have to pay it off in instalments, but okay. [Counting on her fingers.] Five years? Ten years?

[Or, how long more does she have until Mari is tired of her?]

1/2

[reclaimedtime]

!

[ Okay. That's not a comeback Mari saw coming, and now on top of the rising heat in her face, her heart's doing goofy little flips.

And then Kanan protests to being called cool. ]

[reclaimedtime]

-- Hey, ten years? That's only ten times a year-- that's not even once for every month! Kanan, you're so stingy!

[rebreathe]

[Another drawling "ehhhhh".]

It's an instalment plan, what were you expecting? [So proud of herself for keeping a straight face right now. This has to be the most convincing act she's ever pulled off in front of Mari.]

Oh. [FIST TO PALM.] Are you doubting that I will still mean it in ten years?

[reclaimedtime]

No! [ Mari Ohara has never had to so much as consider the idea of an installment plan in her life, and she's not going to start now! ] I don't want an installment plan, I wanna hear it every day!!

[ STOMP STOMP. Keep this up and you're well on your way to receiving a tantrum. ]

[rebreathe]

[ehhhhh.jpg]

It'll lose significance when I say it every day!

[Scarcity is value, see!!] If you put a recording of my voice in a plushie, there's no difference!

[reclaimedtime]

That's not true at all! Kanan is way cuddlier than any plushie could ever be!

[ And she buries her face right into the very cuddliest part of Kanan with a majestic plomf. At least that seems to pacify her a little. ] Hmph!

[rebreathe]

Mari... [Not whining, not quite, but soon. Soon.

What kind of statement are they making here. And couldn't this wait till they reached her place. Mental Image Dia is starting a rant on setting a poor example and public morals and she really, really just wants to sit down to contemplate her life choices.]

[reclaimedtime]

Kanaaaaaaaan.

[ This one's definitely whining. Whining all the way, and showing no intention of moving.

Oh, and grumbling, too. ]

... If I told you I loved you every day, it really wouldn't make you happy anymore? Even though I'll mean it just as much every time?

[rebreathe]

I... [Would like that. A lot. Had, in darker hours, her wildest of dreams, desired nothing more. "Happy" wouldn't begin to describe the emotions Mari stirs within her with the mere suggestion.]

How lousy was I at showing you the way I feel, if you need to ask?

[How much more contact does she have to initiate? How can Mari be content with making her repeat the same words over and over, sincere or otherwise?]

[reclaimedtime]

[ Mari glares up at her, cheeks puffed out like one highly dissatisfied hamster. The warmth that pools in her belly at Kanan's response is overshadowed, for the moment, by how utterly dense she's being. ]

See? It'd totally make you happy! It's not gonna lose its value, and it's nothing like putting a voice recording in a plushie at all! Nyeh!

[rebreathe]

[They weren't on comparable terms from the start. Exactly how did Mari figure she could go from not intending to say anything at all to doing it every day?]

...I'm not fighting with you over this. [Although she already is.] You deserve better than to settle for forcing it, and I can't go promising you what I don't have to give.