bakerstreet | THE KISSING BOOTH MEME

[ The prey has spotted the spider or vice versa. ]

What have we here...?

[Muffet is all beaming smile. She gestures out with all six of her arms, displaying the booth she stands behind rather proudly.]

Ahuhuhu, why a kissing booth of course! It's my latest offer alongside a menu of select teas and baked goods~.

[ He politely joins in her laughter all the while evaluating this anomaly of a girl. ]

I'm afraid the beverage I seek is closer to your heart.

[ He steps to her and after a split second's indecision singles out what might be her dominant hand. He bows and kisses her knuckles. ]

Surely no one needs incentive to kiss you.

[His action prompts a moment of surprise, those five eyes of her momentarily widening. And then she presses one of her hands to her cheek, head tilted in an air of coyness.]

Well aren't you a charmer! I always have loved a gentleman, you're all so sweet after all.

[Her eyes squint a little as her smile sharpens.]

Such fine desserts, ahuhuhuhu~.

I remain sweet when others lose their savor.

[ And whatever happened to those ever so sweet gentlemen that preceded him? She's unaccompanied but for the spiders Ferid is casually pretending to tolerate, all for the mystique of the queen.

He places his fingertips under her chin and coaxes her head to rise. ]

I think I'll make a donation to your business.

[ With that he gently seals his lips over hers—but not too gently, tasting the texture of her lips before his fanged mouth withdraws. ]

... If the lady allows it.

[Oh ho, he's not a shy one in the least! Just the kind of customer one would expect for this type of venue. There's no need to fight his action and she seems perfectly willing to go along with the none too gentle kiss. Hopefully she isn't too prickly with her own fangs.

She gives a pleased smile, leaning forward on a multitude of folded arms.]

You do drive a hard bargain, dearie. It seems though you've already taken the service. Now there's just the matter of payment.

[Because no man is worth a loss in potential revenue. The spiders swaying above her seem to agree.]

[ He smiles innocently. Greedy girl. ]

A payment in proportion to the service.

[ His gloved hand passes over the honors so brazenly adorning his vest and produces an elegant, gold dagger. He offers her not the blade but the ornate hilt. ]

From my collection. An expensive toy with a trick up its sleeve. If the blade tastes blood I'll know it and...

[ He folds her fingers over the hilt of the blade and holds her hand in his. ]

come for you. Of course, you may sell it if you please.

[He's as strange a fellow as he is gentlemanly, at least on the surface. The hilt presses into her hand as he holds onto it and all of her eyes track downward in mute surprise. There's something both amusing and endearing about the gesture and the payment. She's never been one to wield a weapon and blades were kept to modest knives meant for desserts.

It's the blade's little trick that has her smiling up at him once again, though this time there's something a touch more serious to the shape of it.]

What an interesting trick. You do know that nothing good comes from running towards spilled blood, don't you? Particularly in a spider's domain.

Oh but little miss, for some of us blood is a reward.

[ The pursuit of blood is in his nature but ironically it's here that Ferid deviates from his fellows. His fancies run deeper than blood, the next meal, which is highly irregular in his kind. His keen interest in young people, for instance, is but another frivolous detail brought up by his critics. ]

The spider is lovely in her dress. If she can pour tea, or be kissed, is she not a civil being?

[ He rounds the booth. The heel of his boot marks the ground between her legs as Ferid draws his arm around her waist. ]

We can co-exist in the dark. A spider and vampire.

[ The noble leans to steal her lips but halts. ]

Ah... I'm Ferid Bathory. May I have this kiss for my undeniable charm?

Spiders certainly are civil - to a degree. Respect given is equal to respect received after all, dearie.

[And even as she ascertains the golden rule on respect, there he is drawing an arm around her and thoroughly disregarding the boundary of the booth itself. He seems to have a propensity for leaning right into her face so she takes the moment to plop a hand against both of his cheeks.

She might even squish his face a little for good measure.]

Such a persistent one with such a high opinion of himself! Are you suggesting I keep kissing you for free then?

[ Boundaries? Why his whole personality precludes them. His affections must be driven off with a stick if they are to be suspended. Fortunately her hand on his pale face appears to deter the man for the meantime. ]

Would it be untrue if I had said nothing? Your continued attention condones my conceit, even when... [ His lips purse over the tip of her finger and leave it damp with saliva. ] ...you push me away.

[ He straightens with a laid-back smile like her question has answered itself. But not quite. ]

Now that would be rather crude. No, I'm courting you, miss. I'd like you to be my lady. And to enjoy the wealth that accompanies that status.

... Courting?

[Well now there's an outcome she hadn't planned on. She taps her finger against his pursed lips a moment, more curious than displeased now. He's not a bad looking specimen at all, if a bit pushy. The idea seems to entertain her after a moment when she snickers out a laugh, all fangs and curved little grin.]

My my, it's been a while since anyone has mentioned that sort of thing to me. Courting is so pleasant but it always seems to end so abruptly. I'm not very good at curbing my tastes, you see~.

[Ahuhuhu.]

[ There is, of course, the inherent problem of his vampiric superiority complex telling he should desist from associating with this creature at once, but such trifles can be overcome. To his delight she displays the mannerisms of a proper lady, and a propensity for duplicity, which is too desirable of a noblewoman worth her salt. The public would nevertheless disapprove, but frankly, fuck the public. ]

Come, we're not vegetarians here. My fair city will just have to do without the poor souls that end up on your plate. These things can be arranged.

[ He takes a (negligible) step back and looks down at the girl. ]

I'll afford you time to think. You have a means to reach me—always with blood, ha ha.

[And even offering a ripe selection of appropriate bakery stock! Any girl would be impressed and Muffet is no fool. With the spiders so nicely settled into their new home, perhaps it was time she think about seeking her own happiness too. Though this leaves one important question.]

You do make a compelling offer. There is one thing I must clarify though first before I give you my consideration.

[Perhaps the answer is obvious but who knows. It would be a pity to find a mate only to discover his tastes were abhorrent.]

What do you think of spiders?

[And not just her of course. There are multitudes of them hanging from her booth by now and settled upon it too, intrigued by the gentleman who's come courting.]

[ Ferid leers at such a patent test of his character. They have an unspoken understanding that he will say "yes" because behaving agreeably suits his purposes, but the truth is he is fixated on the biggest spider in the den and that speaks for itself. ]

Mhm, now that I've seen the cream of their crop.

[ Ah, he's still undecided which set of her eyes to follow, much less on the girl's formal attire if he is to take her to some aristocratic function. Should he contact his personal tailor? But he's getting ahead of himself, ever thinking of the future and those who might just live to see it.

Although he is given to effeminate gestures Ferid is by no means weak of heart. He'll let her spider retinue march across his epaulettes if need be. ]

I'd expect you to move in my manor in Sanguinem. We vampires reside underground like yourself but you can't very well stay in this pit.

[Mmm, a pit? That's a little rough to say but Muffet mostly laughs at the emphasis.]

Luxurious surroundings are always nice but a lady knows how to make any web her home so to speak. I do have an actual pit where I hang my web that's very useful for my pet~.

[ His distaste for the plain is an inversion of his endless pursuit of the unique and terrible. His hoarding of ancient treasures pales in comparison to the tenacity with which he hounds people, the true object of his fascination. He is hard pressed to speak well of the underground, of all but her really, its strange gem.

It occurs to him that beneath her murderous insinuations she is in fact anxious, perhaps even frightened of leaving the home so knows so well. ]

Then we'll dig a pit of our own and your pet will not go hungry. You have made a home with your own tw— [ He smiles and corrects himself without missing a beat: ] your own hands, but it's obvious to me that you were meant for greater things.

[She's rather impressed really. She makes a note mentally to bring him around her darling cupcake, just to see if he's really as tolerant as he seems. She waved ones of her hands, another pressing against her cheek.]

Greater things, hmm~? Now you have me curious. Do you need a spider to keep your parlor that badly?

[ It isn't so much that he deems spiders grotesque but their association with neglected, shabby places that rubs him the wrong way. He enjoyed the privilege of participating in countless bloody battles and has seen untold creatures. He grows receptive to the idea of keeping her monstrosity in his home. Dangerous and exotic pets are, after all, in good taste. So are people. The words are interchangeable really. ]

I "want." It's a small but important distinction. Blood, I need, but you I have chosen of my own will, and now the choice is yours. What do you want? By now you surely have an opinion of what kind of man I am.

[She considers a moment. Generally Muffet's opinions on people are very cut and dry. Do you like spiders? Do you treat them well? Then she has no problem with you. Humans and other monsters concern her very little beyond her spider brethren and the fate of those clans.

His proposal demanded a touch of a deeper opinion however. She taps her lower lip with a finger, one of her other hands settled again her hip.]

If I must be perfectly honest with you, you seem like that forceful man with your desires. I interest you because of what I am, yes? It's not a shocking thing to understand, dearie, and it certainly doesn't offend me.

[She gives him a cheerful smile, finger still poised against her lip.]

It's not a bad situation at all. I'm interested in you because you're interested in me. There aren't many of my sort in the Underground, you see. Most monsters would rather not crawl into my web and still fewer want to linger with me. All for very logical reasons of course~.

[Her smile curves a little, still cheerful but with an edge to it.]

So I believe I wouldn't mind dallying with you for a while. To be honest I want to see where your whims and desires take you in the end.

THE KISSING BOOTH MEME

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