"I have formulated a five-point plan for surviving in prison"

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"Did Kevin Bridges accidentally buy a horse? - Would I Lie to You? [HD]" (Watch on YouTube)

"Lee Mack and his keys - Would I Lie To You? [HD]" (Watch on YouTube)

WOULD I LIE TO YOU
Would I Lie To You is a comedy panel show where contestants have to bluff about their deepest secrets and the opposing team have to find out which ones are true.

How does it work?
☢ Post as your character, offering suggestions of strange habits, unusual stories or other unbelievable series of events. These can be as true or as false as you like.
☢ Tag around to others, questioning them about their statements in order to discern whether they're true or not.
☢ Try to stop others from figuring out if you're being honest or a liar.
☢ Revel in hilarity and unexpected revelations.

Comments

[eats_snakes]

I know your type, Kaz. Been around you long enough to have a good idea.

[he thinks. hot, blond, foreign usually?]

Never said I didn't want it-

-hngh. Why are you interested into my sex life all of a sudden?

[neverloseagain]

Because it's fun to watch you get embarrassed about it.

[eats_snakes]

[now he's in grumble mode. he's blushing slightly too. see?]

I don't get embarrassed. I'm not the one who got sand in my speedo at the beach. [oh god. bringing up that one again, Snake?]

[neverloseagain]

See, that's not embarrassing, that's a fact of life when you go to the beach wearing what I did.

[eats_snakes]

Looked like you had a live python in your swimwear. [yeah. snake jokes.]

[neverloseagain]

Maybe I wanted to make you feel comfortable-- have one of your kind around.

[eats_snakes]

Riight. [He doesn't buy it, Kaz.]

Sure you weren't trying to turn me on?

[neverloseagain]

If I was, I'm guessing it didn't work.

[since you're making fun of it and all]

[eats_snakes]

How do you know that? I might have been hiding my feelings from you. [Trying to be romantic, Snake. Yeah, not so great at that. But, he did like seeing your speedo, Kaz. Shh.]

Not every day I get to see my sub commander in a speedo.

[neverloseagain]

[that bit about feelings was completely unexpected, and Kaz's brain comes to a screeching halt. he wills his face not to flush at that kind of bluntness. every once in awhile, it hits him all over again how very, very American Boss is. is he kidding? he has to be kidding, no one would say something like that and mean it seriously.]

[unfortunately, willpower does nothing to stop Kaz's face from turning red, and when he feels his skin burning, he panics, looks down in an attempt to hide it, and shoots the first clever comeback he can manage out of his mouth in an attempt at distraction.]

You should try it. Bet it'd look good on you, too.

[once he registers what he said, he wants to sink through the floor. is it too late for Boss to be his kaishakunin?]

[eats_snakes]

[He can see the colour of your face changing, Kaz. Is he amused? Hell yeah. He knows how much you can embarrassed over little things but underwear? That's on a whole new level.]

I'd never get into that speedo, Kaz. I'm too big.

[Hear that? Hope he's not embarrassing you further, Kaz.]

[neverloseagain]

[swimsuits and nudity? never. feelings? yes. alluding that he thinks his friend would look hot in a speedo? also yes.]

[banter, banter he can do. the cockiness returns to his voice and the blush starts to fade.]

So now your claiming to be 'Big Boss' in that department, too?

[eats_snakes]

I'm not claiming. I know I'd be too big for that speedo. Take a shower with me and find out.

[He's serious. Does it sound gay? Hell yeah but Boss doesn't know that. Or, does he?]

[neverloseagain]

Hey, you don't have to prove anything to me. I've got your back no matter what, Big Boss or Small Boss.

But if I take you up on that offer, do I get punched again? Because that's not how you encourage a guy to get back in a sauna with you.

[eats_snakes]

[Boss grunted in amusement at that. He knows you've got his back, Kaz, and he's grateful for that.]

Huh? I won't punch you. Who says other stuff might happen instead though?

[Laying it on thick? Yep.]

[neverloseagain]

[Kaz stares incredulously.]

...you're flirting with me. Seriously flirting with me.

[apparently, Boss is not joking. Boss is actually just that bad at flirting. amazing. well, how else had he expected Big Boss to flirt other than with all the grace of an elephant barreling through the forest?]

Uh, before we go dropping any soap, what was that part about feelings again?

[eats_snakes]

[Flirting? Is that what it's called? Snake's just being factual, right?]

Uh-huh. Maybe I am. Just stating a fact about my physique though. I am large down below. [He's about as subtle as a house on fire.] Don't get too big-headed though, Kaz. Just because I have feelings for you.

[neverloseagain]

[he flushes again, and grits his teeth in some kind of attempt to will it away, and also, maybe, make his heart slow down. when he speaks, it's a little shaky.]

...that simple, huh? Just like that?

[snake is unbelievable. not that Kaz is the type for romantic confessions either, but jesus, way to hit a man with a train at a hundred and forty kilometers per hour.]

[eats_snakes]

What's wrong, Kaz? Not afraid of sharing another shower with me, are you?

[he smirked. it was going better than he hoped. just seeing the younger man blush and all awkward was a turn-on for snake.]