Buddy Cop AU meme

[memeorabilia]

You're two renegade cops with nothing to lose. A loose cannon who plays by his own rules and a tight cannon who plays by everyone else's rules. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence. Shit's getting real? You better believe it. Shit's always real when you two are on the beat. This, is the Buddy Cop AU post.

Rules:

1) You're a character posting in a meme (blank or not, don't care) with your character's name and fandom in the subject line.
2) They're a character replying to your comment.
3) YOU FIGHT CRIME!

For the creatively stunted, I do have some prompts if ya need 'em.
1. Out On The Beat
Out on patrol in your squad vehicle of choice or on foot. Looking out for action, be it someone stealing from a little old lady or a gang getting ready to beat some poor schmo up.

2. No Time for Backup!
Looks like they have you surrounded! It's a firefight/fistfight, and you two are in the middle of it! What are you gonna do? Run for it? Call for backup? Or go down in a blaze of glory? Or none of the above.

3. Next Time, I'll Have Your Badge!
One (or both) of you just got chewed out by the chief because your methods are reckless and unreliable! Seriously, you killed at least 40 people AND ran your squad car into their hideout! Who do you think you are? Also, you're off the case! What do you do now?

4. We're Going Undercover
No, not like that, you crazy smut writers. But, you're going to need to get the drop on these crooks, or get some info out of them. Luckily, you're a master of disguise. Yup, you two are going to have to dress up and act like them or something along those lines in order to get the info you want!

5. Looks Like He Was Murdered Over Here
Man, fuck those detectives. They aren't finding anything important. No, you and your buddy could probably figure this out just by looking about the crime scene. From the bloody outline on the wall to the lab in the basement, you probably have this covered. Just remember, don't touch anything.

6. A Good Ol' Fashioned Game Of--
Good Cop, Bad Cop. You finally got the lead you're been waiting on, and all that's left is to get the info you need out of them. Thus, you and your friend get the opportunity to interrogate the poor sucker and make sure that they talk. In order to do that, one of you might have to become a little unstable, and the other may have to act as if they're trying to comfort them. Don't forget to ask, WHERE ARE THEY

7. Another Day Done
Welp, you two are officially off duty. What're you going to do now? Go out for drinks? Go looking for trouble now that you're not restricted by the law? Or maybe talk about the tough day you had of foiling evil. Doesn't matter, now you have the whole night to think about it.

8. Wildcard
Mix/match or make your own. Anything goes!

credit goes to ringomogirebeam

Comments

[suppressthedark]

[He finally does sigh, but at least he doesn't smack Joseph over the head. Then again, that might be because he sees that small moment of sadness - but he doesn't mention it, instead focusing on the conversation.]

It's probably why she's actually meeting us. We still have to exchange sake as proof that we're a part of her Family, though we'll just be Shatei - little brothers.

[Footsoldiers, essentually.]

Technically, she's a saiko-komon - the senior adviser. But...well. She's basically the boss.

[A man comes out to them, and slightly bows before gesturing them towards a door. Ichigo sits up straight before standing, slipping on his more serious face before following. For this to work, he'd basically have to act like Joseph was his subordinate, and thus not bother with even telling him to follow.

Showtime.]

[perspicaciousness]

Ceremonial stuff, okay. Guess it can't be that bad.

[Though what he does know of organized crime rings, there's almost always more to it than that, so he's at least bracing himself for something else to inevitably come up.]

Boss in all but name. Got it.

[When they're nudged toward the door, he straightens, stretching before silently following Ichigo. He's not exactly thrilled about the role he has to play here, but, well, he wasn't in the mood to potentially lose another partner, either. He couldn't do that to himself, and he's sure as hell that Ichigo would probably haunt his ass for years after the fact.]

[suppressthedark]

[Oh lord, would he EVER haunt Joseph. Throw around some plates and become a poltergeist. But, he didn't plan on dying - and he's glad that Joseph's got the idea here.

Hanabi Fumiko still looks quite young and beautiful, despite what she is - then again, that's not surprising. Her husband had been the boss, but she'd still gotten to her place before he was killed in a skirmish, so it wasn't like she didn't deserve her position.

Thankfully, it all went relatively well. Ichigo bluffed and said Joseph was honor-bound to him when he saved his life, and thus wouldn't leave his side when he decided to join. She either believed it, or decided not to pry - although he couldn't help but notice how she coquettishly looked at Joseph from time to time.

She...wasn't interested in him, was she?

In the end, three Sake cups were brought out, along with high-class sake - and, after pouring it, Fumiko lifted her cup, giving one line in english -

'To you, my new little brothers - the proper young man and the dashing englishman.'

Ichigo choked down a disbelieving noise at that, and just....drank.

He needed a drink right about now.]

[perspicaciousness]

[To be honest, Joseph was more imagining someone ... tougher-looking than this. Then again, he's sure that plenty of people (himself included) had made the same assessment of his own mother, especially in his case where he hadn't actually seen her since he was too small to really remember. That was an interesting family reunion, to put it lightly.

Though he's honestly surprised at the looks he's getting from boss-lady, and to be quite honest, he's not sure how to react. Yeah, she was cute (once again, surprisingly so), but at the same time, she's yakuza. Even if she were serious, this would not end well on any level.

Never mind his engagement to Suzie Q.

Still, if they could pull this to their advantage ...

It's about this point that Joseph has an idea. Which meant that things are about to get really stupid, really fast.

At Fumiko's line about a "dashing Englishman" (it was hard not to break out into a shit-eating grin at that), he decides to take it up a notch and give her a wink before taking the sake cup to drink from, though he's definitely not used to the taste of it.]

[suppressthedark]

[OH good god.

Ichigo just barely manages to not yell when he sees that wink, instead resolutely staring forward as he finishes the sake and sets it down just a little too roughly to be normal. It's obvious he's tense, and Fumiko ends up giving a gentle laugh.

'Calm yourself, dear little brother. Your handsome man hasn't given me any disrespect. Quite the opposite, in fact.'

God, she was - she was outright flirting now. Was this her way of testing them? or did she just have a thing for huge british men?

He murmurs out an apology in japanese, casually kicking Joseph's leg as he does so.

do not fuck this up.]

[perspicaciousness]

[Joseph has to bite down a yelp when he's kicked, giving Ichigo a bit of a look. This wasn't going to be like the cross-dressing incident, god. One time he decides to do something a little creative and everyone jumps down his throat for it. Nobody likes thinking outside the box, apparently.

Though at least he's attempting to be cautious, even if it might not seem it. Maybe.

Hopefully.

He does, at the very least, manage a smile once he's finished with the sake. Just let things happen, kiddo - life's more fun that way.]

Sorry if he seems tense - the whole thing's new for both of us, really.

[suppressthedark]

[Joseph, the cross-dressing indecent was a disaster. No Matter how well you think you can pull off a dress and makeup, you're built like a brick shithouse. It was never going to work.

Either way, Ichigo's nearly having a conniption - but he at least tries to relax for the sake of the mission. Right up until Joseph mentions it being new for both of them and then it goes right out the window.

God damn it Joseph, he has a cover of having some experience in yakuza dealings! But Fumiko apparently takes it in stride, merely tilting her head.

"Ah yes, I can imagine. You, dear little brother, are most likely not used to a woman being in a high position of power in a family - and you, my charming englishman, are not accustomed to that and how our ways work. I understand. But...."

Almost instantly, it's like the room becomes a freezer - and Fumiko's smile becomes something much more deadly, as if she'd become a hannya right in front of them.

"...Do not think that I am soft, dear little brothers. Or that I would not hesitate to end even charming men such as yourself if need be. Of course, I would not hurt your darling selves, but perhaps you should keep it in mind as you live as members of our family."

And then the tension leaves in a rush, Ichigo giving a quiet exhale and feeling sweat run down his temple as the Oyabun sits back and smiles at them. While he'd been in quite a few life or death situations before, he'd also learned to tell when someone was bluffing, or if they meant what they said - and she meant it, every word. Fumiko was known for being particularly vengeful, after all...]

...Understood, Fumiko-sama.

[Thankfully, their visit was almost over. And it couldn't come fast enough for him.]