is it hot in here or is the floor LAVA

[memeorabilia]

Just share the damn bed with me.


For whatever reason, the floor is an unacceptable place to sleep. It's messy, the dog is there, THE FLOOR IS LAVA, there's flooding, feels weird, or it's too dirty to walk on. Who cares why it's not acceptable, it just isn't! Normally, that's not an issue, but tonight you have a friend over. Maybe it's the safest place, maybe it's hurricane season and your house is the only one out of the path of the storm. Are they mooching off you? Stop trying to figure out the details! Just get over it and share the bed with that person! Sexy times are not required. Intimacy is not required. Just share the damn bed already.


Do you need options? DO YOU? Here! Have some options!

1. It's late. You're tired. Too tired to drive and THE FLOOR IS LAVA.
2. It's late. You're drunk. Too drunk. Honestly, how did you drink that much and not die? Should we take you to the hospital? Here, just stay in this bed with me. No, you can't sleep on the floor. THE FLOOR IS LAVA.
3. It's early. You thought you'd just come by and visit but you can barely function. The bed seems inviting. Guess what, you're invited into the bed! Yes. The bed. Not the floor. THE FLOOR IS LAVA.
4. DO YOU LIKE TO CUDDLE? CUDDLING IS OKAY. And yes, the floor is lava.
5. WILDCARD. Just figure out a reason why you need to share the bed. But don't forget: the floor is lava!
6. The Crack Fun Insane Option - Actually play the Floor is Lava Game!! Move about the room without touching the floor... because the floor is seriously lava.

Comments

man that's crazy but it's their loss tbh, your sam is fantastic

[devotes]

[ The Winchesters are truly the only thing Castiel has left and he's considered them to be like brothers to him for years now. A sentiment that has been well-earned. In many ways they have proven themselves more family than any of his siblings have ever been. (And that's not his kin's fault, they were created to be tools that do not feel like humans do, weapons of God that exact his righteous fury and carry out their duties without question.) They have accepted him and taken him back even after all his astronomical mistakes and all the times he's hurt them personally.

It's Sam and Dean who have taught him the true meaning of family. But for all the years he's known them and despite their acceptance, there are still times when he feels like an outsider. It's a hard feeling to shake when he's perpetually torn between two worlds, when he still feels like the tool he's meant to be and when he knows that the Winchesters will always choose each other above all else. Which is fine, he understands, and even though he's made his choice years ago— humanity, although really that just means the Winchesters, something even his siblings know at this point—the pull of duty and obligation is always there, written into his very code.

It's an inner conflict that has been there the moment he started rebelling, the very reason he went back to Heaven as soon as the apocalypse was stopped, and he feels it now more than ever when he's cut off from Heaven and responsible for everything that went wrong with it, unable to fix it and hated by all his kind. What makes it easier to forget for a little while is losing himself in the stories on TV and also moments of warm company like these, with Sam smiling and whole by his side. Sam who is less rough around the edges, kind and gentle, and who understands the cost of screwing up more than anyone else given their similar experiences in terrible decision-making. ]

I know. Thank you, Sam.

[ Because even though he might feel conflicted about it himself, the sentiment is still very much appreciated. That Sam might actually want him around is a very nice thought indeed, one that keeps him feeling content in this moment and warms him as much as Sam's earnest smile does. ]

My way is better. [ He states with the smile still lingering on his lips and although the statement is fact, there's the hint of a tease in the cheekiness of the words. At least Sam doesn't argue, lets Castiel heal him without resistance, and it's something Castiel certainly appreciates after Dean's obstinate refusal to let him help in the only way he can.

He almost misses the touch to his elbow for how light it is, but he does catch it in time to reach out and let his fingertips touch Sam's in reciprocation of the gesture. He's still not very good at things like physical affection, but he's been learning and getting better, in part because of Sam. The gratitude is hardly needed, it's the least Castiel can do while he remains cooped up inside Sam's room, taking up his space, so his answer is a simple: ]

Of course. Welcome home.

//// asdflg really, thank you so much, that means the world coming from someone that writes so well.

[hollowly]

( it comes, of course, from being unable to choose one's family; sam has been lucky, has more than considered himself lucky in that respect. sure, he and dean have had their moments in which they don't agree, are at extreme odds with one another or aid in the making of horrible life choices that may or may not inevitably end in the end of the world – but somehow, they always manage to pull one another back from the brink at the very last moment, to redeem themselves not only in each other's eyes but in the eyes of those they respect the most, and were it not for the distress and general chaos in heaven, things might just be back to what they used to be.

you know, before the apocalypse, before the war among the angels, before things had been said and done that can't be taken away by a few choice words or actions, things that must be remedied with time and patience and penance. ( and, truthfully, he thinks castiel has made far more effort than is really needed to make his amends where he thinks he needs to make them. there is only so much one can do in the face of the ones that blame him for things that have gone wrong – and, granted, it would seem that angels can harbor grudges far longer than anyone else – but there is only so much in the way of things he can say to give any sort of … reassurance that he's taking steps in the right direction, that it's only a matter of time before he's managed to redeem himself fully, and hell, if he doesn't?

he will always have a place with the winchesters. always, and then some. )

it's nice, though to feel like he has a place, even if the bunker itself still doesn't feel much like the home that dean has made it for the two of them. for as much as he's always wanted the normal life, that which he has been consistently denied since as far back as he can remember – it's castiel, and it's dean that makes this place feel more like a place he can finally belong, with his little box of tokens and memories built up over the years that he keeps only for himself, the things he wants to remember and the things he can't afford to forget. with everything they've lost along the way, the mistakes they've made and the paths they've taken in the name of thinking they're doing the right thing, maybe they don't quite deserve what they have in this place here, and even if sam will never take anything for granted, there's still a looming sense of something over his head that insists that it will all come crashing down when they least expect it, when everything seems fine and dandy and good, the false illusion of a steady but imperfect life.

but it's worth it, to have it all right here and now, living in the moment something that he's been trying to teach himself to do. just as dean has for years before him, never looking too far forward but always looking back, dragging the past into the present and not letting go. the winchesters, they live too much in the past they've supposedly left behind them, where it belongs.

and there's something real, something nice about being so comfortable with castiel like this. with their rough beginning, their own personal set of trials that they have overcome with the passing of each year, each small step taken down the road that has led them here – to say he's thankful for it, to put it mildly would be the least of an explanation given, words falling short when it comes to describing the warmth in his heart when that small but genuine smile is given to him. for something as mundane as the playing of netflix in the background while they make smalltalk, while they dance around the inexplicable affection that has grown between them – and with neither of them knowing much of what to do with such a thing, unaccustomed as they are to it – it's still far better than anything either of them have been allowed to have in some time, and even if it's awkward, they're taking strides to understand it.

and that's what matters, isn't it?

his touch is reciprocated, just as soft as his own, and even if the curve of his smile is genuine but small, there could be no more warmth to it – because it radiates, fills the space between them with everything he's feeling but can't put words to, the gratitude and affection, the simple and small things that pass between them that don't need words to fill the silence. ( and that's one more thing that sam has always been able to appreciate about their resident angel; he might not still understand the nuances of what it means to be human, but he never quite feels the urge to fill the silences with needless words, instead far more content to let things linger as they are, the knowledge of the simplest understanding enough to let it all just simply … be. )

and there's a thought, a small and almost-not thing that swims to the forefront of his mind – an action that could pass, another show of affection that he isn't quite sure would either be merited, justified or even wanted – and it has him lightly licking his lips even as his eyes fall closed for another small moment, a light huff of a laugh slipping free as an errant piece of hair falls across his forehead. )

It's nice … coming back to this. ( an unspoken to you is in there, if nothing else. ) I could definitely get used to it.

akjsf no YOU ♥

[devotes]

[ With the threat of the Darkness out there, their current peace is an illusion. Castiel is aware of that. There's no doubt that what he and Sam have done in order to save Dean will catch up with them sooner or later, another disastrous consequence of a selfish choice made. Given what they've unleashed upon the world, they probably don't even deserve the illusion. But he doesn't regret it, not when they succeeded in freeing Dean of the mark and it brought him and Sam closer together even though going behind Dean's back always feels terribly wrong. They knew full well there would be a high price to pay. That the price is potentially the entire world isn't that much of a surprise, all things considered. It's par for the course for them when their stakes have been getting higher and higher ever since they first met. The apocalypse is pretty much a cakewalk compared to the odds they're facing now, trying to fight something they know absolutely nothing about.

It's because they don't know anything that there's currently nothing they can do but try to carry on as usual and so Castiel is content to stay in their little illusion of peace and normalcy for as long as he's allowed. It's made all the more easier with Sam by his side, radiating such a heartfelt warmth that Castiel can actually feel for a moment like he belongs. That he's right where he's supposed to be, and more than that, that he's wanted. It's a fleeting sense, it always is, and it's one that he tries to hold onto desperately for as long as he can until it inevitably slips through his fingers and he's left feeling lost and questioning what he is all over again. It's a better distraction than Netflix could ever be, one that actually manages to make him feel lighter and less burdened in the face of a family lost, a great threat looming over their heads, and his dwindling sense of self.

Sam's company is special and Castiel appreciates it more than words could convey. Where Dean would be quick to get fidgety and impatient, he and Sam can sit together pouring over research in comfortable silence for hours, simply taking comfort in each other's presence. Even Castiel knows that's a rare thing to be treasured. Just being in one another's presence simply for sake of it is somewhat new to them though, but he finds he enjoys it greatly. It's hard not to with the smiles and little signs of affection he's so generously being given by Sam. He soaks it all in like a plant reaching for the sun, letting it warm him from the inside out.

The sudden light huff of laughter has him looking at Sam with curiosity, puzzled, and yet he can't help but keep smiling despite not knowing what might have warranted such a sound. At first he's too captivated looking at Sam to ask—there's the strange urge to reach over and brush the stray hairs out of Sam's face that he's not quite sure what to do with—and then he gets too distracted by what Sam says. Or rather, what he leaves unspoken that Castiel picks up on anyway. It fills him with a rush of warmth, gripping and squeezing his heart, and it makes him tear his gaze away, glancing down at his lap where he moves his hands to idly fiddle with the remote, almost bashful. ]

So could I.

[ The words are like a quiet confession, carrying an unspoken desperate wish. 'I want to stay.' He does, truly, but he's never sure if he'll get to. Circumstances always seem to find a way to tear him away from the Winchesters so he knows better than to think he'll get to stay. He can still hope, though.

Oh, how he hopes. ]

oh my god i am so sorry this is over a week late i hope the quality makes up for it .. ;;

[hollowly]

( there's the distinct feeling that they don't deserve the illusion of peace, for all that it's been offered to them anyway – or that they've simply taken it without asking, because with how long they've had to deal with dean and the mark of cain, sam will fight tooth and nail to convince the world, the universe that they deserve a break. just enough time to take a breath and hold it, hold it until their lungs hurt, let it go and take yet another in its place. to get their bearings. to take stock of their wins and losses, though he can't think they have too many of the former, far too many of the latter, and nothing in-between that could possibly hope to set some sort of balance.

they don't deserve this, no, but there's nothing saying that they can't take it anyway. because with nothing to go on as far as the darkness goes in the first place, finding themselves at a standstill and spinning their wheels no matter which way they turn is as good an excuse as any to take that much-needed breath. to rest aching and weary bones and minds, hearts that pump dust through brittle veins as that breath rattles against ribs on its way out.

and while sam has never been greedy, never thought himself to be – not in the sense that human beings generally are, anyway – he isn't going to turn this down, throw away the chance to simply exist in the space he's come to call his own with nothing waiting for him just outside the door, responsibilities and the things left unfinished left to wait until he's regained some manner of composure, some manner of himself.

time spent like this with castiel, it's always been enough when it all comes around to it. winding down with dean means a beer or seven and banter thrown back and forth as easily as it has been since they were children. it means greasy food and crappy tv shows and potentially drunken arguments about who had been the greatest superhero of their collective childhoods. ( dean will say batman, sam will say something ridiculous like captain america or spiderman, and it will all go downhill from there. ) on the opposite end of the spectrum, there can be stretches of silence in which he and cas either put their heads together for research or do their own things, respectively, but it's been a while since he'd realized that just having the angel near is a comforting thing. a blanket sort of peace sliding over him without him realizing until he notices that the tension, the stress has all but slipped out of him.

and this is what this is like, comparatively speaking, the ease with which he can stay in the other's presence, soaking up the small nuances of affection he gives in return more than enough to quell any disquiet that might still linger within him. castiel … has almost always had that effect on him, disregarding those angel powers of his that are capable of healing just about anything that could ever be wrong with him –

it's how comfortable he's come to be with him. and if he'd deigned to reach out and sweep away those stray pieces of hair like he'd briefly thought about doing, there wouldn't have been any sort of complaint from sam's end, even if it might have come as something as a surprise. because humans are the tactile ones, and even with as long as cas has spent with the winchesters …

well, it might have made him feel the slightest bit special. )

Yeah?

( it's not so much a question as it is a small sound that slips from the back of his throat that sounds vaguely curious, and though he doesn't catch castiel peering at him as he had been, he looks up now with a brow quirked, mouth pulling to the side in that trademark little grin that seems, consistently, more and more just for the one next to him. )

Kinda thought you might have already. ( just being with them in general –

or does he mean with sam, specifically?

ah, things to ponder … )