The BDSM Lifestyle Meme

[ladyboneranon]

The BDSM Lifestyle Meme

BDSM isn't all about the sex. Sure, handcuffs, whips and chains, toys, power and control-play can be fun, but sometimes it's about the other stuff too. The little stuff. The ways you and your partner give yourselves to each other every day.

So this is a meme to play out safe, sane, consensual and maybe even non-sexual BDSM.



If you want more information, check out:

The Ten Golden Rules of BDSM Negotiation
Sexuality.Org's BDSM Index
The Keys to A Relationship
Extreme Restraints

Be warned: Threads and prompts below may contain triggers, and will contain sexual content.

THE EVERYDAY:
1. feeding: using him as a plate? having her kneel and accept hand-feeding? maybe someone's been very good and should have a tasty reward.
2. bathing: after all, you have to take care of your partner. it's nice to have someone to get lotion in those hard-to-reach places.
3. talking/therapy: how are you going to work out this relationship? what obstacles do you have to overcome?
4. massage: some intimate relaxation.
5. dates: it's good to go out every once in a while.
6. negotiation: to work out what kinks are and are not okay.
7. nonsexual bondage: gags, bridles, chastity belts. some people just like the security of bondage in everyday life.
8. humiliation/in public: take your pet out to show her off; bend him over a bench and spank him for bad behavior.
9. animal play: pony play, pet play.
10. punishment/discipline: someone's been bad. maybe it's time for a time-out. or maybe someone has to clean the bathroom with a toothbrush.
11. other

THE SEXUAL:
1. the light stuff: some handcuffs, some ropes. nothing too extreme. maybe one partner or the other is afraid; maybe it's just time to take a break from the trappings and have some love-making.
2. bondage: chains, or elaborately knotted ropes, or full-body bindings. maybe even suspension in midair.
3. caning/whipping/spanking: for punishment and for enjoyment of the pain.
4. shaving: you like them with smooth skin. no beards, no lovetrail, no hairy legs.
5. piercing/tattooing: a permanent mark of devotion.
6. sensory deprivation: gags, blindfolds, earplugs, to shut out the rest of the world.
7. as therapy: exploring a past trauma or fear.
8. first time: one partner or another is experiencing the kink lifestyle for the first time.
9. kink parties: for casual play. mind the rules; drugs and alcohol are rarely tolerated, and all play must be consensual. or else the host or hostess might get angry.
10. orgasm denial/forced orgasm: until they beg for it, or beg you to stop.
11. ageplay: perhaps someone wants to be treated like a child. maybe a little daddy or mommy kink to go along with it.
12. role-play: taking on roles. master-slave, teacher-student, dragon prince and slave-dancer -- your imagination's the limit.
13. genital torture: pain where you're the most sensitive.
14. electricity: to give things a spark.
15. medical fetish: sounding, stirrups, speculums -- oh, doctor.
16. fucking machines: it'll keep in the same rhythm, no matter how much you beg.
17. other

Please do NOT leave your comment blank! (Blank comments will not be deleted, but we highly recommend that you post something.) Either write a note on desired kinks/undesired kinks or create a scenario or fill out the textarea below:
YES: MAYBE: NO:

Comments

Steve Rogers | MCU/ Various AUs | ota

[just_a_guy]

As a Dom:
YES: Caregiving, aftercare, and everyday situations. Most of the kink options are open, save for the ones mentioned below. I'm pretty open, just PM me about things not mentioned on the list first.
MAYBE: Age-play (nothing below 15, please), electricity, medical fetish, or fucking machines (If only because I think Steve would have to be talked into them)
NO: Any bathroom play of any kind (which isn't on the list anyway). Genital torture.

As a sub:
YES: All of the above. (Yes, really.) PM me if you're not sure, but mostly I'm okay with everything on that list.
MAYBE:
NO: Bathroom play of any kind.

[not_a_commie]

Bucky's sitting on the couch of his and Steve's small apartment in Hell's Kitchen, winter was coming he could feel it. He'd hoped they would both be able to keep enough money coming in to turn on the heat every once in awhile. If not well they'd made due before. But he didn't think they could afford another trip to the doctor if Steve got sick again.

Michael | Nikita | Open

[servedhiscountry]

ooc: Very interested in the non-sexual as well as sexual. I will be having him mostly sub or switching or Doming on command. I can usually come up with a reason for him being in most any situation. Strong preference on orgasm denial with him.

YES: discipline, orgasm denial, as therapy, sexual torture, sensation play
MAYBE: shaving, piercing
NO: pregnancy or mpreg

Nepeta Leijon | Aged Up to 18 | Homestuck | F/M, OTA for castmates

[arsenicpounce]

YES: Pretty much everything, sexual or not, except what's mentioned in 'NO.' I kinda really want to try Piercing, First Time, Forced Orgasm, and Roleplay.

Roleplay absolutely for Nep. I mean, c'mon.

MAYBE: N/A.

NO: Fucking machines, shaving, and medical.

Marcus Flint | Harry Potter

[plays_dirty]

Dom:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

Sub:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

For both care giving is a big YES.

[agoodfinder]

I could get into this.

Castiel || Supernatural (AU gender-swap) || OTA

[angelwithashotgun]

YES: feeding, bathing, talking/therapy, massage, dates, nonsexual bondage, humiliation/in public, animal play, punishment/discipline, other (ask) // the light stuff, bondage, whipping/spanking, piercing/tattooing, sensory depreviation, first time, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, fucking machines
MAYBE: negotiation (I don't really care...? xD), kink parties
NO: shaving, as therapy, role-play, genital torture, electricity, medical fetish

Can be sub or dom, just let me know which you want.

There's an entire list of acceptable kinks here.

[winchester_lost]

[ooc: I rolled humiliation/in public if you're game. Also open to anything on your yes list, so, if there's something you'd rather... Kind of interested in Cas as the Dom if that's okay. :) ]

Izaya Orihara | Durarara!! | OTA

[knifedances]

YES: Anything listed on this meme works, aside from the few in the 'no' section below.
MAYBE: See above.
NO: No to the therapy or date options as I don't think it'd work with this character. No pregnancy of any kind, no bathroom kink.

Because I am terrible and keep being drawn to it, Everyday 8

[neverlikeddolls]

[Namie couldn't help but feel impatient as she waited for Izaya. He had been as vague and cryptic as he ever was when it came to explaining what they were doing or where he intended for them to go, or why they had to both go when she was pretty sure they both had their own things to be getting on with.]

Bucky Barnes | Marvel

[not_a_commie]

Dom:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

Sub:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

For both care giving is a big YES.

Thor Odinson | Marvel

[caffeinatedgod]

Dom:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

Sub:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

For both care giving is a big YES.

Clint Barton | Marvel

[nexttarget]

Dom:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

Sub:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

For both care giving is a big YES.

John Watson | Sherlock

[blogging_mystery]

Dom:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

Sub:
YES: Most stuff is open as long as we build up to it. Feel free to pm me about scenes.
MAYBE: medical fetish
NO: Bathroom play, straight up non-con, fucking machines, genital torture

For both care giving is a big YES.

gaila | star trek xi / dom preferred

[pheromones]

DOM:

YES: all of it minus anything in the below lists. no preference because basically it's all awesome this meme is beautiful.
MAYBE: humiliation and discipline will require just a bit of talking out first.
NO: genital torture, electricity, animal play*, fucking machines*, sounding*.

SUB:

YES: all of it aside from anything below. aftercare.
MAYBE: spanking, bondage, piercing.
NO: humiliation, discipline, caning/whipping, first time (because it just... won't be), as therapy, genital torture, electricity, animal play*, fucking machines*, sounding*.

*note: gaila also available in mirrorverse flavor, in which case everything goes other than the starred activities.

Re: gaila | star trek xi / dom preferred

[queen_of_sex]

((OOC: I think Galia playing as a Dom might be interesting but I have to be sure you're comfortable with the backstory behind Alice and be sure it's something you'd be interested in.

Alice was a sex slave for quite a few years so this is an exercise in trust and helping to show her that giving herself to just one person can be a good feeling.))

Thor | MCU | OTA

[hotforahobo]

As Dom:
As I play him, Thor is the fluffy sort of Dom with lots of aftercare and cuddles and wants you to leave happy.

YES: Aftercare/care giving, sensation play, bondage, discipline
MAYBE: shaving
NO: scat, watersports, ageplay

As Sub:
I play him on the masochistic side as a sub as well as eager to please and happy to take orders(unless he thinks he'll like the punishment.)

YES: Open to everything listed except ageplay. bloodplay. pegging/femdom. sensation play. I'd like to try some C&BT with him too.
MAYBE:
NO: scat, watersports, ageplay

2, 1?

[shiniest]

[This has always been a trust thing for Kaylee. She'd only put her life and her body in the hands of someone she trusted, but when she does trust someone, it's sort of beautiful just giving herself over sometimes.

She's awaiting further instruction, eying the ropes that have been chosen for today's play.]

Ba'al | Stargate: Continuum | Domiant - OTA

[notbocceball]

If you want to try him as your submissive please PM me first otherwise assume he'll Dom.

YES: sexual or non-sexual scenes. bondage/ non sexual bondage. discipline. whipping. aftercare. knife play. p. much anything.
MAYBE: piercing/tattoing(he really really has to like you)
NO: bathroom play, ageplay

Rolled Everyday: 2, we'll probably tie in at least 6,000 kinks though

[sorcerous]

[ These few days have been torturous. Ba'al is toying with him. Nothing like torture, nothing like the first day, when he'd been pieced apart. He frustrates Loki, asks him questions and goes -- and Loki's attempts to manipulate him tend to fall somewhat short. He's discovered how to make Ba'al angry. How to make him leave. Not how to make him favor Loki.

Short and useless leashes for a powerful and important captor.

He has learned from the slave that Ba'al is more intelligent and more powerful than he'd previously believed. (Nothing new; since he'd lost Earth to the alien worm, he'd surmised as much.)

Today, he makes his way to Ba'al's chambers (escorted, as ever) and clasps his hands behind his back, standing as tall as a Prince should. Regal dignity, simmering anger. ]

I want a private bathing chamber.

maria hill | mcu / ota

[headbitchincharge]

DOM:

YES: role-plaaay, first time, kink parties, discipline, forced orgasm/orgasm denial, and especially the nonsexual stuff (feeding, bathing, talking). anything not in the below lists is fair game.
MAYBE: humiliation/in publick.
NO: piercing/tattooing, genital torture, animal play, fucking machines, aftercare.

SUB:

YES: nonsexual feeding, bathing and talking, which she'll have the hardest time with. again, role-play, first time, kink parties, and anything not otherwise mentioned.
MAYBE: dates, medical fetish, electricity, aftercare.
NO: genital torture, animal play, fucking machines.

Britta Perry | Community

[britta_ftw]

Dom:
YES: Caregiving, nonsexual bondage, humiliation/in public (within reason), punishment, role-play, anything not listed in the NO category (though you can always PM if you've got any questions).
MAYBE: Animal play, age play.
NO: Bathroom, kink parties, shaving, genital torture, fucking machines.

Sub:
YES: See above.
MAYBE: See above.
NO: See above.

tony stark | iron man/avengers / m/f

[assemble]

SUB:

YES: everything nonsexual especially humiliation and negotiation, kink parties, as therapy, sensory deprivation, orgasm denial, electricity, and anything not otherwise mentioned.
MAYBE: fucking machines, caning/whipping.
NO: piercing/tattooing, ageplay, sounding, animal play.

tony doms the world so just sub for this meme.

you said b and i couldn't resist.

[telepathic]

[ in the grand scheme of things, emma could probably do better. sure, tony is arguably the biggest dom when it comes to the world, but emma always has enjoyed a challenge and tony provides a rather interesting one. this entire thing (she hesitates to call it a relationship since it's not technically one in the strictest sense) has been going on for months, she still remembers the first scene they did together, the scene where she decided that if she was going to dom someone officially, it'd be tony. and normally he can behave enough, so why shouldn't she take him out to show off.

she always has liked showing off what she has done. this is no different, except perhaps tony is feeling a bit unruly today. and that just won't do. ]

Anthony. [ she whispers calmly in his ear. her tone is warning one and he should be familiar enough with it from the other times she's used it. the next step is punishment if he can't behave. (and really she had been hoping this would be a nice trip to show him off.) ]

bruce banner | marvel / m/f

[alittleworse]

DOM:

YES: first time, negotiation, as therapy, the light stuff. anything not mentioned below and sooo much aftercare.
MAYBE: animal play can be attempted but will result in hilarious failure. medical fetish.
NO: ageplay, fucking machines, sounding, piercing/tattooing, humiliation, discipline, torture, . HE'S JUST NOT GOOD AT BEING MEAN REALLY.

SUB:

YES: orgasm denial, first time, negotiation, nonsexual bondage as therapy, and shaving because lol ruffles. anything not listed below.
MAYBE: medical fetish.
NO: ageplay, fucking machines, sounding, piercing/tattooing, torture. basically keep the pain light or there'll be a mess.

Kaylee Frye || Firefly

[shiniest]

She's more likely a sub, but dom is not out of the question. Same preferences apply either way.

YES: massage, nonsexual bondage, bondage (light or elaborate), sensory deprivation, orgasm denial/forced orgasm
MAYBE: punishment/discipline, humiliation, spanking, fucking machines, roleplay, (light) medical fetish, animal play
NO: ageplay, basically any extreme pain, therapy

[angelwithashotgun]

[OOC: Would you be up for fluffy care-giving/bath times with a (dominant) AU gender-swapped Castiel from Supernatural?]

James Norrington || Pirates of the Caribbean || OTA

[chapter_behind]

As a Dom:
YES: Almost everything with discussion
MAYBE: See above
NO: Scat, Vore, Waterplay, Medical

Otherwise:
YES: Orgasm Denial, sensory dep, humiliation, bondage, impact play
MAYBE: Basically everything else
NO: Scat, Vore, Waterplay, Medical

Negotiation!

[cravats]

[Lyall is prepared for this. He has a notebook and everything. He's sitting rather primly, but he's ready to go.]

Where do you want to start?

Nora Gainsborough || True Blood

[mendacium]

Dom:
Yes: bondage, nonsexual bondage, sensory deprivation, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, punishment/discipline, whipping, spanking
MAYBE: humiliation, animal play, ageplay, roleplay
NO: genital torture, medical fetish, electricity, piercing/tattooing

Sub:
YES: bondage, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, punishment/discipline, whipping, spanking
MAYBE: ageplay, roleplay, nonsexual bondage, sensory deprivation
NO: electricity, machines, genital torture, piercing/tattooing

[ratherberotten]

[[ OOC: Womenz okay? ]]

judith lehnsherr / ruth eisenhardt | xmfc / marvel | m/f, dom only

[eisenhardt]

DOM:

YES: all the every day, first time, caning/whipping, as therapy. anything not otherwise mentioned below.
MAYBE: humiliation/in public, piercing/tattooing, role-play.
NO: kink parties, animal play, fucking machines, medical fetish, electricity, genital torture, ageplay.

Drusilla || BtVS

[forprincess]

Dom:
YES: bondage, caning, whipping, spanking, punishment/discipline, humiliation
MAYBE: animal play, nonsexual bondage, sensory deprivation, orgasm denial/forced orgasm
NO: shaving, piercing/tattooing

Sub
YES: ageplay, animal play, nonsexual bondage, bondage, caning, whipping, spanking, punishment/discipline, humiliation, sensory deprivation, basically bring it on.
MAYBE: roleplay, parties, therapy, orgasm denial/forced orgasm
NO: shaving, piercing/tattooing

Ise Nanao | Bleach | F/M preferred

[eighthlibrarian]

[I see her more as a Sub than a Dom, unless you have a reason to want it the other way round...]

YES: most things, open to discussion
MAYBE: most things
NO: ageplay

Lady Sif ( mcu ) ota

[scoffed]

dom.

no: feeding, humiliation, animal play, shaving, ageplay, role-play, genital torture, or medical fetish
maybe: kink parties, electricity, fucking machines
yes: anything not listed above

sub.

no: feeding, shaving, ageplay, role-play, genital torture, or medical fetish
maybe: kink parties, electricity, fucking machines
yes: anything not listed above

( ooc: as a writer I'm more confident with sub writing than dom writing, but I am willing to do dom if partner can be patient. )

Illyria | Buffyverse | M or F

[godtoagod]

She is an ancient god in the body of a human, and she is used to being worshiped. She is most definitely a Dom.

I'm more comfortable playing her in the Everyday category, and if she is your Dom, it's because you worship her, so no 3,5, or 6. She's not especially sexual, so anything in that category would be purely information gathering/experimentation on her part.

everyday it is, and 7

[joshiseito]

[Some days, Gogo isn't sure why she trusts Illyria, but she always remembers: she is a god, one to be trusted always, trusted and feared and praised and adored.

She is the sort prone to worship, just naturally, worship of the powerful and impressive, and Illyria is that. She herself is nothing, she's just silly little Gogo, and she is willing to lay herself at her mistress's feet however she may require.

She doesn't question it when she's summoned, she doesn't so much as blink when brought before selections of harnesses and gags. She trusts that there's a reason, and she will do as her mistress requests.]