bakerstreet | it took so long to get me back on my feet } THE RECOVERY & RELAPSE MEME

it took so long to get me back on my feet } THE RECOVERY & RELAPSE MEME

the recovery & relapse meme

I. physical

⑴ illness | are you being nursed back to health, or struggling with a repeat appearance of the symptoms?
⑵ injury | bones knit and wounds heal. but sometimes, they reopen at the worst possible time.
⑶ addiction | kick that bad habit! or, you know, not.
⑷ wildcard

II. mental/emotional

⑴ relationship | things are finally looking up for you and your friend/partner/colleague! or oops, nevermind, your bond is falling apart at the seams.
⑵ worldview | you're trading in your rose-colored glasses for a pair with a much more jaded tint....or the reverse.
⑶ trauma | either healing from a painful experience, or succumbing to the damage it inflicted upon you.
⑷ fixation/obsession | you've gotten much better about controlling yourse— ooh! shiny!
⑸ wildcard

III. spiritual

⑴ absolution | your faith (in the world, in the god of your choice, whatever) has been given a much needed boost....
⑵ corruption | ....that, or it's degenerating rapidly, possibly into something much more warped.
⑶ wildcard

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[Tried, maybe even succeeded. He had enough of base that it was a matter of refining and honing his skills. Though if she had killed herself... in her mind, she would have deserved the beating.]

/I'm used to broken ribs./

[Signed even as she grit her teeth at a jolt of pain.]

/I'm still less injured. I'll hang around and take care of food and fielding questions./

[She knew she was inviting herself into the apartment, but with Erwin's unconscious state and Levi's injured state, they needed someone to keep things running. Selfishly, Ginia also wanted and needed the company and it was better than walking between Wind Building and Flame Building.]

[he sighs, because he is exhausted, and there's no point in watching an unconscious man sleep. Levi doubts that even if Ginia is used to broken ribs, it makes it hurt any less. But she's right - she is less injured than either one of them, and she'll be more capable of doing something should Erwin need it. Should he need it.]

Fine. But I want you to wake me up when he does. Got it?

[Ginia nodded and waved him on. Go get some rest or try to. Ginia settled into her watch, only taking Levi's chair when her knees began aching. The pain was bad and as much as she said she was used to it and put on a brave face, she was at her limits.

But they needed her and so she pressed on, taking relief neither of them could see her so weak. Her vigil continued. When Erwin stirred, she rose from her chair to check on him, but it was never more than shifting or mumbling. Feeling his forehead and noting it was abnormally warm, Ginia went to the kitchen to get a damp towel and a bag of ice for her ribs.

So her watch continued.]

[Levi himself is out for several hours, waking with a horrendous headache and a dry throat. His entire body aches, but there's nothing he can really do about it. He half stumbles to the kitchen for water, thankful this time for the free availability of a running sink, and downs about two glasses before he returns to Erwin's room and Ginia.]

How is he?

[he probably sounds about as tired as he looks.]

[Ginia turned to Levi and gave a shake of her head.]

/He was feeling feverish so I put a damp towel on his head. He's been out the whole time. His bandages will need to be changed, but I can't move him by myself./

[Ginia rose from the chair to give it to him. She was exhausted and it showed on her face, but her mind was too awake to rest. And even if she could sleep, she wasn't ready to face nightmares just yet. Her nerves were a bit too raw and memories too fresh for that.]

/I can see if any healers are free./

I'll help.

[truthfully he'd feel better if Erwin could regain consciousness at least for a little while, just to settle down the worry that he might not ever wake up. It's a stupid, irrational fear, but after having already witnessed him in this state once before, it seems stronger the second time around.

Not for the first time he curses himself for not yet being at the point where he could try healing Erwin himself. He'd been working on learning a little bit of magic that was available here to heal, but it's a slow process, and he's not even close to being able to manage more than just a scrape.]

Don't think I'll be able to do any good. Haven't had enough time to practice.

/I haven't had much luck myself./

[When it came to learning Nala's powers, Ginia hadn't had any luck at all. She knew it wasn't because she was a hopeless cause; Kipinn had come easily after time. But Nala remained silent still. Ginia took it as a silent sign she wasn't a good person.]

/Best course is to take care of any wounds he has on the front, then get him in a sitting position to wrap his back./

[Ginia breathed a heavy sigh, breath catching.]

/You get bandages and towels, I'll get hot water./

All right.

[moving again. This was painful, but he moves because he's sure that Erwin will be in much more pain when he wakens, and because he thinks Ginia's also probably hurting more, even if she's not hurt quite as badly. Or perhaps it's what he tells himself to make himself move, at least.

It takes longer than he'd like, but he manages to gather the necessary items with his good arm and returns to Erwin's bedside, sitting heavily on the mattress. It takes him a moment to realize he's just staring without really thinking.

He blinks.]

He looks like shit.

[There's always something to keep you going. Ginia forced herself to focus on Erwin, and later Levi, and ignore all of her pain. She could rest when she was dead, wasn't that the common saying? Though did it apply when you'd already died? Bad jokes, bad thoughts, she laughed at herself as she filled up two bowls with hot water and balanced a third empty bowl in the crook of her arm.

She returned to the bedroom and set the bowls down on the nightstand. Levi's comment earned a weak smile and a nod. He really looked bad between the bandages, the bruises and swelling, and how pale he looked.]

/He does. Such a pity for a handsome man./

[Ginia leaned in and gently pressed her ear against his chest to listen to his breathing. It was shallow, but it didn't sound like a lung was punctured or any other complications. Nothing to do for his ribs, nothing she could do anyway.

The shoulder was far more worrying, compounded with a torn wing. Even with the help of healers, Erwin would be out of commission for awhile as everything healed.]

/Any idea how bad the shoulder injury is?/

[Levi looks at her a moment longer after that comment about Erwin's handsomeness before snorting lightly. Erwin is considered handsome, and despite his ruthlessness the man certainly knows how to pour on the charm when he wants, especially if it means squeezing money out of nobles.

He almost makes a comment about how at least Erwin will be able to shave himself this time, but holds it back. Ginia doesn't need to know. Erwin doesn't need to know. At this point, he's the only one who knows what happens, and as far as he's concerned, it can stay that way.

Levi moves to start undoing the bandage over Erwin's shoulder. It's difficult with only one arm, and not his primary one, either.]

Looks worse than it is. Just got the muscle.

Edited 2014-01-28 18:43 (UTC)

[Ginia liked the captain enough to tease and get under his skin once in awhile. But her and Erwin were were both as attractive as they were manipulative and ruthless and maybe there too lay some attraction. Since their first meeting, they'd flirted and teased and manipulated, giving and taking favors. It was a fun game, but only a game and dammit if she didn't harbor some affection and attraction to him. But that was a different game to play.

She helped Levi unwrap the bandage, slowing when dried blood began sticking layers together. Just the muscle, good and bad in their own ways.

Ginia reached for a towel, soaked it in hot water and wrung it out, and began to gently wipe blood away and loosen the bandages. The gauze and cotton pads underneath the bandages were soaked all the way through. She grimaced as she carefully worked the layer away, dried blood and scabs flaking away. The wound still needed to be cleaned, but at least it didn't seem infected.]

[he's seen a lot of gruesome wounds - soldiers missing whole limbs, ragged from being literally bitten or ripped off. In a lot of ways he's used to it, but that doesn't mean he enjoys seeing it at all. Not especially on Erwin, who is normally so solid and -

well. He certainly isn't whole anymore according to his memory.

Soiled bandages are dumped on the floor. Everything will be thoroughly cleaned again when he's well enough, and in the meantime he'll just have to learn to ignore the grime.

He grabs a cloth, dips it in hot water and wrings it out as best he can with one hand before starting to wipe away the blood that's coated thick and sticky on his skin.]

[They work in silence; even if Ginia could talk, what would she say? Together they get the wound cleaned out - good, no infection, might even heal cleanly - and patched up again. It'll be good for another few hours, then they can repeat the process all over again.

The missing wing worried Ginia the most. Keeping the wound covered up was important, but what about when it began growing back? Was there risk of infection? Did they have to keep it covered and wrapped up? Jesus. It was too much to think about. Ginia forced herself to focus on the present.

Get Erwin sitting upright without aggravating his broken ribs or injured shoulder. Do so without making either of their injuries worse. Perfect. Wonderful. Fuck everything.]

/Any ideas how to get him up?/

[He aches and feels his injuries twinging just looking at Erwin. They needed to move him to get at the missing wing, but he knows he's not strong enough to do it himself, and he's not sure that Ginia is up for it, either.]

No, fuckin' asshole. Too fucking big for his own fucking good sometimes.

[Wasn't that the truth. He would have been manageable if Levi hadn't broken his arm or if Erwin hadn't broken his ribs and lost a wing. Ginia heaved another exhausted sigh, rubbing at her cheek with the back of her hand.]

/We might be able to lift him if we stand on either side if we both keep a hand on his back and I keep one on his chest?/

[No, that wouldn't work. Moving and bending was hard enough with her ribs banged as they were.]

/How about putting him on his side?/

[ No ideas needed--apparently all of the moving and shifting and bandage-changing has caused Erwin to stir. He wakes slowly, eyes sliding open but not quite registering his surroundings. The pain is intense and overwhelming and too distracting for him to think straight. Had a Titan...? His chest feels tight and his back burns, and that is only the beginning.

It's difficult to keep his eyes open, but that is what he concentrates on, even if he's having difficulty focusing. He doesn't recognize the blur of his surroundings, and he doesn't hear voices, though he feels someone touching him--hands on his shoulder, his side, but whose?

Even if nothing else makes sense, he can probably guess. ]

Levi.

[ The name is practically a cough, voice hoarse and weak, throat dry. ]

I'm here.

[if he feels an immense amount of relief, it's not apparent on his face or his actions - though he is relieved. Levi asks Ginia for a glass of water, and between the two of them helps support Erwin's head enough to that he can drink. Afterward he takes a clean, damp cloth to wipe down Erwin's face and neck. It isn't hard to see that Erwin is struggling for the slight consciousness that he has now.]

And yeah, you look as terrible as you feel.

[It's a blessing he's awake, but there's nothing they can offer for the pain. Ginia quickly retrieved the glass of water left on the nightstand and moves to help Levi support Erwin. She lets Levi take the lead, quick to pass over and take away items as needed.

She's glad he's awake. It's a good sign, though there's still a long road ahead of them. Her hand reached down to give Erwin's hand a small squeeze. Welcome back, Commander. Hang in there.]

[ Even if it was expected, it's a relief to hear Levi's voice (calm, even, familiar) as much as it is to gulp down at least half the glass of water presented to him. It's only when Ginia takes his hand and squeezes it that he becomes aware of her presence--and with her, again becomes aware of his surroundings. Luceti. Yes. He hadn't been injured by a Titan at all. That's a strange thing to think. It's difficult to do much thinking at all, when he's in as much pain as he is, but it would be even more difficult for a man like him not to think.

He returns Ginia's grip, though his lack of strength surprises even him. Still, he manages a wry curl of his lips, and something of an attempt at humor. ]

Yet you allowed Ginia to see me like this anyway? And here I thought you were on my side, Levi.

She probably finds you more disgustingly attractive now.

[It's shocking to see him taken down like this, but Ginia was right- if anyone could pull through it, it'd be Erwin. He'd somehow managed to survive cutting off his own goddamn arm back home. He'll survive this, too. Even if he doesn't know about that yet.]

Besides I couldn't exactly fight her off.

[he glances at her once, then back to Erwin.]

We need to change the bandages on your back. Think you can help us out, or are you too much of an invalid?

/Men with scars are exceedingly attractive./

[Ginia signed, honestly not minding if no one noticed. But she rolled her eyes at Levi's comment and slid off the bed to clean her hands and fetch fresh bandages.

She seated herself on the edge of the bed and waved her hand to get Levi's attention.]

/I'm changing your bandages next you grumpy asshole./

[ Erwin notices, but it takes him longer to process the signing than it normally would. He might laugh if it didn't hurt so much. He has plenty of scars already; one or two more won't hurt anything. ]

I can sit up.

[ He probably can't, actually, but Erwin Smith is nothing if not ambitious. He's already trying to push himself into a sitting position despite the flare of pain from his ribs. Unfortunately, he is not quite succeeding, though with some help he might be able to manage it. ]

[Levi would give Ginia a look if he wasn't so tired. He'd also smile were he capable of that, but he isn't really, so he intones flatly:]

Ladies first.

[Erwin takes his attention again then, and he helps him sit up, though he's only got one arm to do it with. This is why he needs Ginia here, really - with a broken arm, he can't manage Erwin himself. The cadets are nearby and could help, but he'd rather it be Ginia than them. They shouldn't have to see Erwin until he's stronger, more recovered. He's the commander, after all.]

Don't take it too fast, moron.

[Ginia snorted dismissively. Aside from the gash in her side, already stitched up and bandaged, there was nothing else to take care of. What she needed were painkillers, but who didn't?

She looked at Erwin's back, her calm expression briefly fading into deep concern. When did wings become such an accepted sight that not having one seemed stranger? Ginia began to pull the bloody bandages away, working as carefully as possible. If his ribs were broken, he could sleep on his stomach or side while his wing grew back in.

He would need pain medication. Even better was sedating him outright and leaving him in the care of the clinic while his wing grew back, but he was in no condition to be moved. And would Levi even allow that? No, probably not. Too tired to keep on a calm mask, Ginia's expression fell into tight-lipped worry.

When the last bandage was removed and discarded, Ginia reached for a towel, soaked it in lukewarm water, and began wiping blood away.]

[ With help, Erwin is able to sit up, albeit not straight--not without someone else to hold him that way, at least, but he moves obediently as directed. He's been injured before, and he's been cared for before--though it's never been quite as bad as this. (Not yet, anyway.) His head is spinning already, but when Ginia begins to wipe at the blood around where his wing had once been, that new pain brings a little more clarity. He clenches his jaw tight, refusing to make a sound beyond a sharp inhale through his nose. He can't see Ginia, but he can see Levi, and he takes stock of Levi's injuries in turn.

Not trusting his voice at the moment, he instead meets Levi's eyes, raising his brows. Tell him about it, Levi. Take his mind off his own injuries for a moment and let him know the extent of yours. Even without being told, he can guess at his own. He knows the feeling of broken ribs, but the pain in his back is entirely strange, and more excruciating than he could have imagined. He knows that it must mean something severe happened to his wings.

However long this may put him out of commission, he wants to know what happened--not only to Levi and Ginia, but to the cadets as well. ]

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