tfln

[trashtalker]

wayback machine tfln or tfln if it's up

Comments

[thearchangel]

That's cheating. Invoking Shepard is cheating.

I did not. Five separate incidents of drowning in hot tubs on the Citadel.

[thenormalsquint]

It's absolutely not. And you didn't answer my question.

I'm sure there were more than five incidents of shootings on the Citadel, but does that stop you from using a gun?

[thearchangel]

Shepard wouldn't ask me to.

[Yes she would.]

That's different. I know how to use a gun - a lot of guns, actually. I can't swim.

[thenormalsquint]

But if she did, would you?

It doesn't matter. You don't need to know how to swim in a hot tub. Again, not that much water.

[thearchangel]

I
well
that's - she's my girlfriend
You have to make your partner happy

[So yes, he would. This loser.]

Why is it so important I use a hot tub?

[thenormalsquint]

Okay, so all I gotta do is go and tell her how romantic you and her in a hot tub would be. Be right back.

[She's absolutely going to do this, watch and see.]

Because Garrus, sometimes it's good to try something new in life.

[thearchangel]

... You wouldn't.

I've tried plenty of new things. Hell, I even learned to dance!

[thenormalsquint]

I already sent her a text.

A hot tub is way easier than dancing on those two left feet of yours. You just sit there.

[thearchangel]

Why would you do this to me...

Hey now. Cortez said I did great. And - Shepard did amazing. That's practically a miracle.

[thenormalsquint]

Because how often will you get to see Shepard in a bikini?

And you'd do great in the tub IF YOU WOULD JUST STOP BEING A CHICKEN.

[thearchangel]

I don't think she owns one. So... never?

I'm not! I'm being practical!

[thenormalsquint]

Oh, then I'll tell her you want to go skinny dipping. Even better.

P is for practical and punkass.

[thearchangel]

Why are you so invested in us?

... No? Just practical.

[thenormalsquint]

Because you two are my friends and I get joy out of seeing my friends hooking up.

Practicality is boring. Be less boring, Garrus.

[thearchangel]

I uh. I'm grateful to be counted as a friend

[But he's too uptight, right, Garrus?]

I'm allowed to be boring after living through the war.