ACCIDENTALLY MARRIED
Marriage is a big decision, isn't it? You think over it. You consider the right person. After all, you don't just jump into this commitment. And nobody enters a marriage by accident.
...right?
RULES
○ Comment with your character, prefs, etc.
○ Tag around.
○ Can you hear the wedding bells?
PROMPTS
1. Drunk Disaster → Ugh, what was in that drink? How'd you sign the right papers?
2. Dare Gone to Far → They said you never would, but you DID. You had to win this bet.
3. False Pretenses → Maybe to make someone angry, maybe to protect yourself, you need to get married. But does your partner know the whole story?
4. Monster Marriage → Summon a demon? Bet you didn't know that means you're their husband/wife now. No take-backsies. Accidentally get bonded with a werewolf/dragon/orc/monster/whatever? Oops, you're married by law in their culture.
5. Fake Dating? Fake Wedding! → You thought this was part of a play or a simple game. Turns out those were real vows you just said.
6. Spoils of War → Your side lost; now, you must pay the price.
7. Culture Shock → Cultures (on this planet and others) can be difficult to navigate. Did you say yes to a second helping of dessert or accidentally acquire a bride?
8. Happy for Now → Huh. Turns out, things worked out after all. You two make a pretty good team, if not a couple.
9. WILDCARD
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bakerstreet2024-02-14 02:25 pm
Piccolo 🪈 Dragon Ball | OTA
Pieck Finger | Attack on Titan
Kalecgos | World of Warcraft
may parker | mcu | ota
fíli | the hobbit ( m/f )
rowena macleod | spn
Alastor | Hazbin Hotel
6...ish
At least they've given up on goading Lilith into leading the charge. That had been a heartbreak and a half, and Lucifer doesn't need any more reminders of just how estranged they are. Or any more parental drama splashout onto Charlie.
Her replacement — he has no idea what her name is — doesn't manage to be nearly as gracious in her defeat. A snarl and a muttered curse, and she sounds the retreat, giving Lucifer a middle finger as she wings her way back up towards Heavenly climes. Just before she vanishes through the portal, the angel tosses something to the ground at Lucifer's feet.
Nothing for it but to head back and lick his wounds. For all of them to lick their wounds. Not a one of them has escaped entirely unscathed, though they should collectively be back on their feet after some stiff drinks and a good night's rest.
But while Charlie herds her drove back to the hotel's welcoming doors, Lucifer bends and picks up— a folded piece of parchment? As he unfolds it, brow furrowed, he quickly realizes what the intricate scrollwork and heavily penned ink spells out: a contract. For Alastor's soul.
He tries to drop it and walk away. Tries to, at least. The damn thing sticks to his hand, won't come off even when he frantically shakes his entire arm. It's the shaking that ends up hinting at the added lines written in big, red, looping letters on the back:
Happy marriage!
♥ L
Still shaking his hand, he turns to Alastor and snaps out: ]
Not a chance in Hell! I will not I do!
omgosh thank you for this
Still riding the battle-high of an enemy well slain, the Radio Demon brushes off one last bit of angel viscera from his lapel before happily turning to follow the others back inside. With the exception of a lawn's worth of carcasses, the only other being out here is Lucifer, after all. Maybe if he's quick about it, he can lock all of the hotel's entrance points before the pompous prick can get in. Wouldn't that be a swell end-cap to an already spiffy day?
...Say, what is he doing over there with that paper, anyway?
Wait. No. There's no way...
Even from this distance, even without seeing the contents of the letter, he knows. He feels it.]
What would even possess you to pick that up? Give it here!
[With a crackle of static, he lunges for the contract -- his contract. But the accursed thing really does appear to already be bound. And Altared, somehow, if he's not mistaken. Altar contracts were messy business. If they don't remove this now, before the spell fully sets, they're both going to be in a lot of trouble.]
...Surely, you don't need both of these arms.
thank you for going with it :)
[ It's not like he'd known it was Alastor's contract. It's not like he had even the faintest hint that Lilith would decide to transfer ownership! As far as he knew, she was happy sunning herself on the beach up in Heaven and didn't have any attention to spare for matters back down in Hell. Not for him, not for Charlie, and certainly not for... whatever she's trying to do with making betrothal a condition of the transfer of ownership!
Lucifer's so eager to be rid of the thing that he doesn't even bother to dodge when Alastor comes barreling in for the grab. He lets the demon have a go at snatching it away, but the stupid parchment remains firmly attached to his hand.
At Alastor's suggestion, Lucifer pauses to give the option serious thought.
...
He doesn't really need both arms, does he? Better to lose one than be shackled to Alastor. ]
You know what, I don't. Off with the arm!
[ But even as he goes to rip his own arm off, the parchment starts spitting sparks. Ah. Apparently, not an option. That's his Lilith, always thinking ahead. ]
Of course! <3
[Alastor rolls his eyes; his smile tight-lipped and forced. The fact that Lilith could anticipate their actions to such an extent just added insult to injury. It seems she is still every bit as infuriatingly capable as the day they’d first crossed paths, several years ago.
...And every bit as infuriatingly willing to pass off all of her familial responsibilities, too. Wasn't it enough that she'd sent him to look after Charlie? Now she expects him to take care of her depressing manlet of a husband, as well?
But he can't exactly say 'no' to her, can he? Not until this switch is finalized, anyway.]
Unless you have another idea, we should probably just get on with it.
[Reluctantly accepting the struggle for the futile attempt that it is, Alastor gathers up what he can of his dignity, taking a pointed step forward and leaning down into Lucifer's personal space. ]
The only thing worse than having to be bound to you would be having others know about it. And if we don't head back soon, Charlie is sure to come check on us.
no subject
Except.
Except that's the worst thing that could possibly happen to Alastor.
Slowly, Lucifer looks at the still-sparking parchment. His gaze shifts up to Alastor in his bubble of space. He starts to grin, wide and toothy and okay, a little bit manic. ]
Why, yes! [ He says very loudly. Loudly enough that there's little doubt the others in the hotel lobby, the door still open, will hear him. ] We should make sure to tell Charlie the good news as soon as possible! Darling.
[ If he has to suffer, he can at least make Alastor suffer MORE. Ha HA! ]
no subject
The trouble is that resisting now, allowing even the slightest bit of his true annoyance to show through, would be a sign that Lucifer had somehow won. And he can’t have that. Never.
It was childish and in some ways detrimental to his best interests, but the desire to one-up Lucifer always out-shined sensible, reasonable actions.
So when the chattering from inside the hotel lowers to a confused murmur – a clear sign that they now absolutely had a few listeners tuning in – Alastor proceeds to do two of the things he does best: 1) be spiteful and 2) put on a show.]
Oh, my tart little sugar apple! If that's really how you want to play, then... Why stop there?
[By this point, the sparking parchment has begun to smolder, growing into a glorious fiery whirlwind of energy. But he can’t be bothered to pay it any mind. Even as it starts to hum dangerously, his eyes are locked on Lucifer's.]
You know, I could broadcast the big news to the entire city! How about that, hm? Let's tell eve̷̲̙͘r̷̖͐ŷ̵͉͓̖͊̈ͅó̷̻̈́̈̄̔n̶͕̑̾̅ȅ̶̢̗̝͇̝͎̦͜!
no subject
A grand idea, my cutie patootie Bambi! [ He still doesn't notice even as the whirlwind of energy begins to weave itself into two golden, glowing rings. That would have meant looking away from Alastor, and all of Heaven's forces invading Hell itself couldn't drag him into backing down now. ] In fact, we should make sure the announcement goes out to all seven rings!
[ His voice drips with malicious glee as he gestures towards Hell's burning sky. ]
Why, we could even send off to Heaven, make sure everyone in the three spheres knows all about the good word of our engagement.
[ From within the hotel, someone shrieks Engagement?! ]
no subject
Followed quickly after by a cacophony of chatter and chaos as everyone scrambles to the front entrance for a peek at the action. There's a shattering of glass, a cackling that Alastor can only assume to be Niffty, a murmur that he can't quite make out but instinctively knows is lewd... Collectively, the lot of them even manage to incite a short musical number.
He waits for it to all die down before continuing. Rather than pull back from Lucifer, the Radio Demon holds his ground, and with as much fake saccharine as he can muster, reaches out to lovingly adjust the other man's bow tie until it looks nice and extra extra tight.]
How could I have ever forgotten - you and our dear daughter have extended family upstairs, don't you, cuddle duckling?
[From above, the rings finally finish forming, solidifying with a sudden clang that sounds suspiciously like wedding bells, earsplittingly loud and reverberating in all directions. But Alastor doesn’t stop for it. Instead, he raises his voice a few octaves higher, determined to talk over the noise. Determined to stay in control.]
What better way to sow peace between heaven and hell than by inviting them down for the celebration!
[He knows what's coming next. Each ring shoots off towards its intended target, like a homing missile aimed straight for the kill. And for a brief, uncomfortable moment, Alastor grins and bears the unnatural sensation of his soul being rebound to another's; pulled, split and stitched as the golden band reforms tightly around his ring finger.]
no subject
And then trying not to just punch his newly betrothed in the face. Our daughter? Our daughter?! It's a complicated few seconds for Lucifer as the conflicting emotions pass across his face. On the one hand, Alastor deserves to be smote into nothing more than a red smear on the ground. On the other hand, calling off the wedding would probably upset Charlie, so he settles for biting his lip to bleeding and grabs Alastor's hand to hold.
Tightly. Very, very tightly. That's definitely some bone he hears creaking. Ugh. He levels off the pressure before anything can snap. He's really trying so hard to be a good dad! ]
At least now they have to deal with you as family, too. [ A beat as he mulls over the idea — yeah, okay, he can get into the relishing bit for this part of the festivities. ] Sugar butt.
[ Hah, all those prissy, feathery fuck-heads now related by the holy bonds of matrimony to Alastor. The burn of spiteful satisfaction helps him with ignoring how he's got a brand new ring on his finger now. And how, for the first time, he can feel the heavy, creaking weight of having a claim on someone's soul. The iron tang in his mouth is just the blood from his lip, though. Nothing more, of course! ]
And lucky you, that means they're you're family, too.
rinoa heartilly | ffviii | m/f
morgan | fgo
edelgard von hresvelg | fire emblem: 3 hopes
mion sonozaki | higurashi no naku koro ni
Cassandra de Rolo | Critical Role
Little of 1, little of 3
The second thing he notices is his left arm is cuffed above his head. He flexes his hand; must've used safe handcuffs. That leads to the third discovery.
He is completely naked except for the ring on his left hand. That wasn't there last night. At least there are covers?
How in the hells did he get here? He's trying to remember, but all he remembers is drinking with a girl he met. A girl... who wanted to really annoy her absent brother...?]
Balayna Ferasini | Star Trek: Discovery
Voicetesting.]
Ben / Prometheus | Legacies | M/M
Keith Kogane | Voltron | OTA - m/m
stelle | honkai star rail