Change

[hemlocksock]

THING I'D CHANGE

Because nobody's perfect!

HOW TO PLAY
↺ Forget those blank comments, info in the subject, usual memes. In this meme, we use the subject line to put the one thing our characters would change about themselves whether they'd usually admit it to anyone or not. Their choice can be a physical, mental, or emotional one, a personality trait, a past mistake or choice, whichever's the most dramatic.
↺ Then: welcome to the peanut gallery! Everybody else comments.
↺ You know that's the meme.

Comments

Easier to love.

[annarr]

[listen]

[bubblegumheart]

Are you not easy to love?

[annarr]

I find myself terribly endearing, but it seems to be a struggle for... [let him count in his head real quick] ...most of the rest of the universe.

[bubblegumheart]

I think you're delightful.

[She also doesn't know him all that well, and tends to like pretty much everyone- but that's entirely beside the point.]

[annarr]

[It's the not knowing him well. He's very aware. Still, she can have a smile for it.]

Perhaps it's a matter of distance. The farther I am from home, the easier it seems to be.

[bubblegumheart]

Maybe it's the same way for everyone. What's your home like?

[annarr]

[Is it normal to have to pause for over a minute, lips pressed in consideration, before describing one's own home? Hopefully, because Loki absolutely needs a minute or two to find the right words.]

It's very beautiful. [Another moment, please.] And ultimately very comfortable. But... [It's just going to be a slow description, clearly.] ...it doesn't always fit me right. Or-- perhaps I don't quite fit it.

[bubblegumheart]

[Perhaps it's not normal, but Chrissy would probably have to do the same if their positions were reversed. Then again, she doesn't generally like talking about it much.]

But you don't like it there?

[annarr]

I like it more than here, at any rate.

[All of Midgard is a little... itchy? Is that what it is? Not important at the moment. What's important is probing against the sensation of possibly being understood.]

It's more... Do you know the sensation of sitting down on a chair that used to suit you, but now you've grown a little too tall?

[bubblegumheart]

That's fair.

[She can certainly relate to having complicated feelings about home. There's a solid sixty seconds of silence while she really considers the question.]

Yea. I think I can kind of understand what you're talking about.

[annarr]

[It's pleasant, actually, exchanging silences. The rarity is a piece of it, of course.]

It's a bit like that, only the chair's actually told me it would simply rather I not sit on it any longer.

[bubblegumheart]

And you still want to sit in the chair?

[Maybe she's completely off here, but it feels like a safe assumption to make.]

[annarr]

I'd at least like to choose when I stopped sitting in it. It's-- [what's the word] --the agency of the thing, yes?

[bubblegumheart]

That would be ideal. [Maybe it doesn't work that way, though? It would be really nice if it did.]

[annarr]

Is it asking too much?

[bubblegumheart]

I don't think it should be.

[annarr]

And yet, hm?

[bubblegumheart]

I'd say that maybe you could find a new chair, but I know that won't be the same.

[annarr]

Have you managed to find one?

[bubblegumheart]

I'm working on it.

[annarr]

Any luck thus far?

[bubblegumheart]

Mmm... not yet.

[annarr]

But you've hope?

[bubblegumheart]

Of course. I just have to make it to graduation and then I can leave.

[annarr]

And that's all it takes? Leaving?

[bubblegumheart]

I don't know, but that's been the plan for as long as I can remember. I'm hoping it helps.

[annarr]

What, since a child?

[bubblegumheart]

Pretty much.

[annarr]

Do you ever worry it will disappoint? Once you're there?

[bubblegumheart]

I try not to because I want to believe that it'll be better than here.

my entire nature

[ombos]

Fuck!

my existence

[roastme]

Yeah, that's not news.

[mousquetaires]

It certainly isn't.

[ Haru's not exactly chiding, though. She wants to give those words the gentleness they need, even if Avenger would argue that it's not necessarily deserved. ]

Do you still feel like what you're leaving behind isn't worthwhile?

[roastme]

Depends on how you define "worthwhile".

[ She knows. She's just being difficult. ]

You're not getting rid of me anytime soon. Even if I was never supposed to exist, I've got shit to do now. Hell can wait its freakin' turn.

[mousquetaires]

Don't be silly. I wasn't worried about that at all.

[ Though it is a comfort to hear, somehow, someway — even if she knows better than to say it out loud. ]

I just don't want you to write off what you've done with this life of yours, is all.

[roastme]

No way. I'm proud of all the shit I've pulled off, even if I still haven't caught up to that saint.

[ She makes a pleased face. ]

Once I'm gone, maybe you'll cry, or maybe you'll rejoice. But you'll always remember how strong, beautiful, and wicked I was, until the day you die. You're my mark on this world. A scar that won't ever heal.

[mousquetaires]

[ For once, it's Haru caught genuinely off-guard here, and she doesn't even try to hide it on her face. She's far from upset about it, mind, but the words out of Avenger's mouth are -

Well, there's a very much undeniable romance to them? And not even in that typical back-handed sort of way, either! Haru is used to having to filter Avenger's words, to pull out their honesty like she would with her beans, but the directness here (the trust, even) leaves her a bit pink in the face. ]

Jeanne, that's, ah...

[ That was kind of...cool?! ]

[roastme]

... What? Why are you looking at me like that?

[ She's not fishing for praise — she isn't a good enough liar for that. She certainly wasn't intending to be romantic, and the part of her that still refuses to assume the best misconstrues Haru's reaction as a rejection. Why? Because she's stupid. ]

Don't even think about denying it. You've wormed your pathetic way inside my spirit origin [ phrasing ], so it's only fair I get to do the same to yours. Hmph! [ Still think she's kind of cool, Haru? ]

[mousquetaires]

I never said that it isn't true...

[ She reminds herself that she needs to choose her words a touch carefully, when it comes to Avenger — even though being completely direct isn't exactly her forte, either. ]

I just, um, thought that sounded nice, is all. Or, perhaps...intimate, I suppose?

[ Oh, why is she getting flustered? This is Jeanne Alter we're talking about, here... ]

being less of a cowardly lion

[shouldhaveknown]

Hm, either that or the need for how much sleep I need to function normally, yep~

my size

[nuraridouman]

[Give him a moment to realize the terrible mistake he just made.]

communicating better

[inlovewithmycar]

[Crowley groans but he can't actually deny it. It probably would have spared a lot of unnecessary spats and misunderstandings.]

Being able to save them.

[moseys_hardcore]

[Not just Zack and Aerith, but Biggs, Wedge, Jessie..his mom.]

Being weak.

[tempusfinis]

[ He's gotta be stonger. ]

My height.

[diagnokicks]

[That's not changing any time soon, Bailu.]

Having been born.

[merinesexual]

[...Yeah, she's not elaborating.]

There's so much that he doesn't even know where to begin with the list.

[eatingcursesout]

[There's a weak laugh, but Suguru's not going to deny anything.]

Being able to be there for the other Gems all the time instead of only when they're asleep.

[apathantarc]

....

[Just had to hit him where it hurts, didn't you.]

Being more openly affectionate

[upante]

There are times when stoicism is an advantage. [ But he doth protest, and it would be nice to be able to tell people he cares as well as showing it through Acts of Service. ]