bakerstreet | Is your muffin buttered?

Is your muffin buttered?

What Do They Think About?

Let's take a peek into your character's spank bank, shall we? Surely there's gotta be some...interesting thoughts amidst all those daydreams.

how to play
- Subject line: character info, prefs, etc.
- Comment body: no blank comments! Your characters being forced to reveal just what/who they think about when they're. Y'know. Taking the self-guided tour. Spanking the monkey. Going on a date with Palmela Handerson.
- OH NO HOW COULD THIS GET WORSE?
- Wait. It gets worse. Everybody's hearing this and, since we're on Bakerstreet, they've gotta put in their two cents.

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Whoever I've seen recently with a nice rack.

[...Okay, and...]

Naga. Cin, sometimes. Various people I've fucked before. Orgies. This is insipid.

Elaborate scenarios that usually involve me getting kidnapped and tied up by a cruel but attractive captor who then has their way with me, no matter how much I beg them to stop.

An excellent fantasy. And with the added benefit that, given some discussion and scene-ending safe signals, you could enact it in real life easily.

To be fair to you and expose us both, I quite enjoy incidental fantasies; a quick tryst in a museum late at night, a post-caper victory fling in a warehouse or on an escaping ship. Silly vanity.

I’d be lying if I said I’ve never been consensually tied up before. It’s quite fun.

But, um…

Capers?

Oh, wonderful, I'm pleased to hear that. Self discovery in any form is one of life's greatest rewards, but particularly in this arena. [ That's such a deliberate way to talk about kinks. ]

I apologize. Capers are... audacious and typically nonviolent crimes. In my case, theft, but for legal reasons, that's a joke, my friend.

So you’re a thief because stealing things gets you hard?

[ The absolute astonishment on his face is there and gone in a second only, replaced by delight. Ninia. ]

How terrible. Yes.

Have you ever laid hands on something that was thought by everyone out of reach, and felt a thrill from your clever success? [ It comes highly recommended. ]

I- well- that is-

[Oh no oh no oh no how did he KNOW?]

…technically? You canNOT tell anyone though or I’m going to be in SO much trouble!

[ Oh no indeed. This is every bit as interesting as the sex fantasies though. SMH Lupin. ]

I would never dream of putting you at risk. I wasn't expecting that, though, you have a very innocent mien.

Would you like to tell me about it?

[Blushing furiously, Ninia produces a sword in a sheath. Both are works of art and humming with constrained power.

The rope that ties them together so it can’t be drawn is entirely mundane.]

I didn’t steal it, you understand. I’m just…borrowing it. Once everything is sorted out everyone will say “Wow Ninia you showed initiative and cleverness and saved the world. We’re giving you a promotion!”

Of course you're just borrowing it. [ Interestingly rather than sounding like he's patronizing Ninia, or saying what he thinks is desirable, he sounds totally sincere. There's no greed motivation for him in theft, so it's a lot easier for him to understand the same lack of covetousness in others, and if her story is true... well, it would explain her attitude toward it, definitely. ]

So you plan to return it to... a country, or an original owner? [ It's too beautiful to languish stuck in a stone somewhere, or a ruin, or a foreign museum, but Lupin keeps that to himself. ]

[If she had detected any coveting, she would probably be bashing him over the head with it right now. Even sheathed, it made a mighty fine blunt instrument.]

It’s the hero’s sword. So I’m going to find the hero and give it to him.

That was the plan, anyway. He doesn’t want it, though, and there’s nothing I can find to even save the world FROM right now!

If there's anything I can do to assist you, I hope you'll let me know. It's a great burden for any one person, even without the criminal legalities involved.

[ The idea that the hero can reject his destiny is... novel, and faintly amuses Lupin, in part because he thinks he'd probably do the same, but... ] Perhaps you are the real hero, after all?

I’M not the hero! I’m the Keeper, and Keepers don’t get that kind of destiny.

[…right?]

We just sort of…help things along.

If you insist, I imagine you would know best. [ There's a very cheeky 'but if you change your mind' energy in that, though he doesn't think it's fair to argue openly with such little information. ]

Out of curiosity, though. Have you used it already?

[Good. We can put RIDICULOUS NOTIONS behind us now and not think about them again until 2am when Ninia remembers this conversation and suddenly can’t sleep.]

If I actually drew it then every magically sensitive entity in a hundred miles would immediately know it. Then the jig would be up. I tied it up to make sure it didn’t come out by accident.

I did hit a guy over the head with it though. He was being rude.

[ Ah, the brooding hour. Ninia is good at this. ] I see. How did you come to know all of this? Is a 'Keeper' subject to special training?

[ He snorts. ] It might be wrong to accept your side of the story without further investigation, but it is my inclination to believe he deserved it... Ninia, is it, then? I am Arsène.

Charmed, Arsène

[Curtsy. Just because they started this conversation talking about masturbation fantasies doesn't mean they can't be polite.]

It's a whole organization dedicated to protecting various relics and artifacts that are only sometimes needed.

It's a good job. Very stable. But...I dunno, it's just kinda boring some of the time.

A lot of the time.

[ Oh certainly. Lupin is 100% fine with both those activities; ironically a bit more nervous at the thought of a 'whole organization', but it's nothing a little smile won't cover, ideally. ]

Sounds very... organized, I'm sure... And completely aboveboard?

In either case, if you long for more excitement, keep me in mind, perhaps we can get to know one another better and at a later date, I can be one of your cackling villains.

We don't answer to mortal authorities, for the most part, if that's what you're asking.

[Look at her feeling so smug and mysterious.]

I'd rather meet with a cackling villain by fate, rather than appointment. But if I find myself in need of a good caper, I can certainly keep you in mind.

I can't condemn such a practise, not exactly fond of answering to authority myself. A childhood curse! Don't think I'm poking fun, either, I find it very compelling that you took matters into your own hands with the sword. That makes the business of your having this gaggle of regimented superiors even more intriguing.

Please do keep me in mind, dear Ninia. And if you feel the need, I'll gladly be your listening ear for ideas about how to avoid consequences for borrowing. Sometimes it helps.

If everything goes well, by the time they catch up with me I'll have already sorted everything out.

If it doesn't...

Maybe I'll need a friendly couch to sleep on.

Myself ☆ Wouldn't I look great in compromising positions?

Men in chaps, flannel and cowboy hats.

[He clasps his hands over his mouth in distress.]

Merdé! Forget whatever I said. I don't know what came over me.

Edited 2024-02-03 20:59 (UTC)

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Is your muffin buttered?

Maeryll | I Roved Out

Ninia, KEEPER OF THE BLADE | Original | OTA

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You know I hadn’t actually considered Ninia unknowingly being the hero until just now?

LOL. I'm glad to be of assistance :3

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kanou aogu | cell of empireo | ota commentary, m/m 21+ otherwise

Tristan | Through the Breach OC