I had to do some recon for a thing and it seemed like the only way they'd take me seriously was if I brought a "friend" along. I'd say sorry but this isn't really an apology. However I will ask what it's gonna take to make it up to you so I don't ever have to hear about this again when they keep contacting you for a year.
But I'm vetoing that as an option so give me something else.
Yeah they're really persistent. They really saw a lot of potential to bring you into the fold. Very eager. If I were less self aware I'd almost be jealous how much they seemed to want you more than me. You're a great name for crazy cults. Why is that?
It's probably because I'm a high value asset and I would bring serious prestige to their organization. I feel like if they wanted you they'd also be locking themselves into ten more corpo lawyers on retainer for whenever you say something insane on live TV.
Offense taken. Insane is a little harsh. I just don't read prompters well and don't like being told what to do. And sometimes that results in me telling terrorists my address and making big announcements that maybe I shouldn't.
But insane? That's hurtful. Incredibly. I'm almost tempted to say now I don't even need to make this up to you because of how rude that was.
I'll be totally real with you man, whenever you say you want to make something up to me it always kind of comes across as more like a threat than anything else. Kind of relieved right now. Like, I just cancelled an emergency appointment with my therapist. Probably related.
Look I can take notes. Read prompters? No. Take notes? Sometimes. So we're saying I need to scale down the making up non-apology gifts. I get that.
How's therapy working out for you anyway? By the sound of that not great, but I thought I'd ask. Everyone's always asking when I'll go which is funny every time.
There are only so many times I can explain away some weird thing I own by saying that you gave it to me before people start to think I'm being paid off.
You've seriously never been to therapy? I thought it would have been court mandated by now.
Message hurtfully received. You don't enjoy my delightful gifts. I'll drink a glass of scotch and get over it. And then forget about this conversation in a month.
I think even if it was, even someone with several masters in various fields of psychology wouldn't touch this with a ten foot pole. Nice dodge by the way. Should I read into that or let it go?
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They've already texted me like 50 fucking times dude. I think if I crushed my phone in the garbage disposal they'd send someone to my apartment.
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Yeah they're really persistent. They really saw a lot of potential to bring you into the fold. Very eager. If I were less self aware I'd almost be jealous how much they seemed to want you more than me. You're a great name for crazy cults. Why is that?
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It's probably because I'm a high value asset and I would bring serious prestige to their organization. I feel like if they wanted you they'd also be locking themselves into ten more corpo lawyers on retainer for whenever you say something insane on live TV.
No offence. I'm just speculating.
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But insane? That's hurtful. Incredibly. I'm almost tempted to say now I don't even need to make this up to you because of how rude that was.
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How's therapy working out for you anyway? By the sound of that not great, but I thought I'd ask. Everyone's always asking when I'll go which is funny every time.
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You've seriously never been to therapy? I thought it would have been court mandated by now.
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I think even if it was, even someone with several masters in various fields of psychology wouldn't touch this with a ten foot pole. Nice dodge by the way. Should I read into that or let it go?
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