feed me, mememore (
sneaks) wrote in
bakerstreet2023-04-09 10:22 am
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The whole flag factory

Sure, you may look like a total catch, but what's the catch? Maybe everything isn't what it seems.
how to play
- forget what you think you know about memes.
- forget the traditional subject line. no prefs. no character info.
- what do you put there instead? verbalize the red flag(s) that should, in a just world, come attached to your characters. be honest. be brutal.
- with this forbidden knowledge in mind, the rest of bakerstreet has to decide whether they wouldn't touch that with a ten-foot pole or if they'd throw caution to the wind and still go for it.
how to play
- forget what you think you know about memes.
- forget the traditional subject line. no prefs. no character info.
- what do you put there instead? verbalize the red flag(s) that should, in a just world, come attached to your characters. be honest. be brutal.
- with this forbidden knowledge in mind, the rest of bakerstreet has to decide whether they wouldn't touch that with a ten-foot pole or if they'd throw caution to the wind and still go for it.
no subject
[ she offers him a smile, sincere if a little weary on the edges. she doesn't like watching another life burning away in a hatred that consumes their broken heart. she has guessed it accurately, it seems. it was a gamble - to see which side of the balance it tipped. but this man is not truly against the world. to put it bluntly, in her opinion, he is lashing out because he assumes that the world is against him. ]
It must have been a long time ago that you forgot them. [ Am I wrong? she leaves that unspoken question hanging after a short pause. slowly she outstretches a hand, painted immaculately with a henna-butterfly pattern. she gestures at the space around them, the crowd, and what lies out and away. those vast and mysterious places that sweep them away from their homes to live through novel experiences. ] Perhaps, you could jog that memory if you travel in these pathways with an open mind.
[ it's a proposal, almost a challenge if he wishes to interpret it that way. forgive-and-forget suggestions are counterproductive to go when he places defensive walls. the wound must be fresh enough to sting. she hopes that he meets many people who will prove him wrong. ]
no subject
...I can't remember. [ the answer is a half lie, half truth. he could, were he stronger -- but he was...instead, his eyes track her hand, gazing to where she gestures -- to the vastness of the world. so many people, and yet none would accept him. so many houses, and yet not one had contained a home. ] I can't-- [ a dull ache resounds through his heart, oppressive as it closes in on him. he returns to reality with a grounding question: ]
What purpose does this serve you? What would you have to gain from this?
[ you don't know me, a child beneath the veneer screams. what reason do you have to? to want to? a self defense mechanism, he tells himself. and yet he hopes for more as he bites back the pain surging through his head. ]
no subject
If you feel lost on your own, then- [ her outstretched hand turns in his direction as a placing offering. ] May I accompany you? I confess I don't know where these paths lead, but I am less shy to stop and ask for directions when we need them.
[ she doesn't say for how long, the nature of these places is volatile, but as long as she remains here. she doesn't mind welcoming a traveling companion. it's not as if she's postponing her fate; the time spent here does not conflict with her obligations. if she can help someone, she doesn't regret it either. ]
Just as people can be foolish and cruel, they also can't ignore those who are in need of assistance.
[ she explains warmly. she may be an existence made in a laboratory, transformed later into something else, yet she still wishes to act according to her perception of "humanity." just as cain said, no matter how they came to this world, they are free to choose what kind of future they want to shape through their wills. ]
Humans don't need complex reasons to help each other. That's what I believe. Do you begrudge my wish to aid you?
no subject
his fate is no less inevitable. he knows this — wants to make everyone else pay the price for it. doesn’t want to go by his lonesome. at its core, it’s a wish born from loneliness and a pathetic end to an even more pathetic lifetime. his teeth gnash— ]
I do. [ i don’t. ] You pity me — mock me…speak of nonsense. Humans seek just cause and reward. They crave, they want — there is no exchange to them without a price! And if there is, it’s a ploy, a means of conquering the heart for your own purposes.
[ arms folded tightly against his chest plate, as if he were a child holding himself, his nostrils flare, eyes still struggling to meet hers. ]
I am no human; I am a monster. And I…cannot comprehend you.
[ “i don’t want to be lied to. ]
no subject
She does not argue his accusations either. Words will always be weak in the face of facts. ]
Maybe you are correct. [ She affirms gently, gold eyes firm and voice as serene as her gaze. There are men who are greedy and vicious, but that isn't inherently a trait of humanity. Otherwise, they would have not built codes of laws and morality with the aspiration to be good. ] But what if you are wrong? [ It's up to him to judge. She has said her beliefs, and she has stood by them. ]
Nothing will change unless you venture out of your shell. [ She lifts her other hand, in a placating motion. A hand that shifts - slowly so he knows she will not attack - into sharpened silver-painted nails that are monstrously long as swords. It's a concession to take the first step to showing sincerity. This activation level isn't dangerous.
She holds out both hands, then. The normal looking one, and the one that morphed inhumanly. ] You are who you choose to be. And I think you are as human as I am.
no subject
so looking away, regressing back into the man who did as he was told, with no rhyme or reason -- he extends a hand. his gaze is cold, not from malice, but with a need to conceal any warmth or vulnerability that could burrow beneath the surface. ]
It is not my agreement that I extend. I am still a monster -- a demon king. And should I die, it will be as one. [ still in denial. this is a step forward towards something inscrutable; it could be in any direction. ] But gratitude...this, I still know. I will follow your lead and protect you from harm's way. Do not disappoint me.
[ another beat. ]
What shall I call you?
no subject
so, she takes the first step with her extended hands and wraps his offered one with both to do a gentle shake, cautious of not cutting it with her long fingernails. the monstrous length of those shifts to become the other one a moment after. demon king, he claims. her smile wans a little as something tugs her heart. three people in her world were bestowed the same moniker -- opposite to hers, the lady-saint. despite being the same sort of creatures. ]
It must be a heavy burden to carry that title on your lone shoulders. [ she answers sympathetically. ] But I prefer to address you by your name if you don't object. [ she waits until he gives a name, fake or true, she can use. a title is a title. it may be like a medal of honor or shame. but it also strips you of your identity once you accept it too much. she knows that serves to protect yourself. that is why she is the "naia sancta" when she leads the battles against her loved ones. but here, there is nothing to fight or hide.
she bows her head and makes presses her hands together as a greeting. ] My name is Lilith Sahl. It's a pleasure to meet you, and I will do my best to fulfill your expectations.
no subject
her nails does not deter him, let alone register until one grazes against him; his eyes flit up to her. ] I wear it with pride. [ a lie. but he will not be pitied, he insists to himself. ] For I am the one and only, and none can replace me. [ another lie; he had a predecessor. every form of life is expendable. a name, she requests -- a name she will have, even if it is a falsehood. ] Odio. You may call me Odio.
[ he watches as she bows her head, gaze still hollow with distrust. and somehow -- there is an absence of resentment. there is no ire, no anger in this moment. it is an emptying feeling. he questions if the name is honest. but it does not need to be. a woman so seemingly holy -- there is no doubt in his mind that she has a wealth of secrets to which she protects carefully. ] Well met, Lilith. [ a demon was still capable of common courtesy. ] Tell me then -- what it is you desire to see in the midst of this world? I shall follow with my blade braced.
no subject
It's not mutually exclusive. [ she says softly without pity, simply stating a fact. ] To be proud of a heavy burden we think we must carry. [ she thinks she could walk out of hers. there were many circumstances she couldn't choose, but she stubbornly still believed in humans even after their wars nearly drove the world to an end.
her gaze flickers in recognition, mouth tightening on a thin line at the sound of his name. she understands the meaning. the colonizers sent to mars came from different backgrounds. mastering all languages was mandatory for the four that led them. ] Odio, then. I hope we can become friends.
[ she nods in acknowledgment of his name. fake or real. it's still saddening yet still hopeful. he can save himself if his being reflects his name. hate is only the other side of love, not its opposite. that would be the yawning emptiness of indifference.
with the introductions done, her pleasant mood shifts into one of brief surprise and mild uncertainty, enough to slip an unguarded response. ]
I don't know. [ her gaze shifts away to stare at the far reaches of this gathering space. she hasn't expected him to ask her that question. she has never thought about what sights she wants to visit. she is half waiting to learn about his preferences or to wander aimlessly. but he took the initiative, and caught her off guard. ] Perhaps...the sea?
[ she suggests tentatively. she has seen the sea in the past, but those times, she was fighting a war. she has never walked barefoot on the warm sand and felt the waves tickling her ankles. or take a moment to watch the sunrise in a moment of true tranquility. ]
What about you? Is there any place you wish to visit?
no subject
but then she reacts in a way that is new and foreign and he feels as if he has struck gold. he is quick to grasp for it. ] Then let us traverse to the sea.
[ he begins to walk, in spite of being the one to suggest he follow. somehow, that’s typical of him — somebody once loathed his nature. he feels this within himself. turning back to look towards her, the reds of his eyes vacant— ]
I’ve seen all this world has to offer. The sea, the sky, the mountains — She has revealed herself to me in the span of a millennia. There is nowhere I wish to go. And so I will follow your whims in my own stead.
Why the sea?
[ “there is little use in traveling when you lack a companion. I’ve witnessed the sea — but never with someone at my side.” is what he wants to say. ]
no subject
Thank you. [ her lips tug into a small smile as she follows his strides wherever they will take them. even if they may not find a shore, she feels happy that he considers his new traveling companion's wishes as a priority. it speaks highly of his empathy. ] You are very kind to ask.
[ she adds, without any shred of any of the mockery that he seems perpetually expecting. he won't admit it (realize it) before he suddenly starts walking away. she falls behind his step and keeps up easily. she has never had any issues following or leading. if anything, she smoothly adapts and falls into either role to match the people she interacts with. she nods when he turns to see if she can keep up, encouraging him to continue. despite its length and amount of layers, her colorful saree won't slow her down. ]
Ah, you must be very worldly after traveling that much. [ she assents, impressed. but she does think in the same terms he means. he has not truly enjoyed them. observing a landscape isn't the same as admiring the splendor of the natural world. ] This might sound a little silly without the context, but after you asked, I first thought of a vast amount of blue.
[ she admits, looking penvensive, eyes gazing at the sky. a pointless act. it is unlikely mars is up there in this unknown dimensional space. then her amused eyes drift back to meet his (or the back of his head, if he has turned to continue walking). ] For many years, I lived in a barren red desert, and the ocean is the opposite of that.
no subject
You’ve a voice and mind of reason. And so I do not wish to see you fall. Do with what I say as you will.
[ his feet march forward, rhythmic and methodical, the melody of a trained knight. he listens to her speak — finds more solace in it then he should admit. ] …It is natural to envision a sight, a scent, a face first and foremost — the mind has a penchant for latching onto the simplest of sensations. [ “it isn’t silly.”
he does look to her when she speaks, this time, his eyes strangely serious, as if he is earnestly investing his attention into every word. ] I see. I, too, resided in the desert; it is a lifeless wasteland. The sea is plentiful, the underbelly of the Earth. It would suit you quite well. [ he can’t imagine it — someone like her, brimming with life, living somewhere so barren. ]
…Do you miss your abode?
no subject
[ she points with a triumphal smile. how can he deny being like this when he gives her that counsel? lilith doesn't answer back to his sound advice, letting him draw his own conclusions about why. a deeply gullible person would argue his logic. someone in denial will be upset. lilith doesn't deny any of that. there is no displeasure or sadness; her countenance exhibits a quiet determination as she nods and looks ahead of them as a signal to renew their travel.
so the march goes on, she keeps up with her own pace. methodical and military trained too, but lighter, almost soundless like the rustle of dried leaves. ]
It does. [ her smile stretches slightly. something a lot of humans share. what makes her feel closer to that too. ] Even after evolving so much, sapient beings still lean on their senses and the sensations like color or sound that please them.
[ she meets his gaze and furrows her brows as he tells her of his homeland. ]
May I ask how harsh the living conditions were?
[ her expression sobers, mouth tightening on a thin, stern life. it may lead the people living there to do anything for survival. ] Thank you, and that-
[ her blank stare lingers for a few seconds, but she keeps on walking. she mulls to formulate an answer for a whole minute. another unexpected query that nobody ever asked. ]
...I do. [ she purses her lips, and her eyes flicker downward. what a selfish response, but she doesn't want to lie about this. ] It was a terrible place for those we -- my loved ones and myself -- were entrusted to lead, but it was also our home where we could be together in peace.
no subject
[ even those who enact kindness of selfishness — yes, those were the most damnable of all. he continues their pace, watching as mountains peak into sight, trees barely obscuring them. ] The sea is to the east. The wind — she carries her scent. [ gaze flitting back to ensure she is following behind briefly, he then adjusts their trajectory, taking an abrupt turn left. he lets her speak — listens quietly and waits for his turn. ]
In a previous lifetime. My form was equine. [ yes, he was a horse. ] And so my suffering was unlike that of a human’s — but I remember. They were scarce for food, desperate for camaraderie, for a force to follow. The desert whets one’s tongue with dust. It was necessary for the humans to remain strong, in unity, to survive her heat. I was merely a pawn in their struggle.
[ he turns to face her this time — his eyes are unwavering as she casts her gaze downwards. the expression he offers is inexplicable, caught in between something pensive and vaguely annoyed (in reality, the irritation does not lie with her.) ]
We will return you to whence you come from after traversing to the sea. One way or another, it is attainable.
no subject
[ she reassures him with a nod. once she returns, lilith is certain she will die as a consequence her own plan, and her heart is at peace with acceptance. the last trump card to ensure she and those like her do not endanger the world again. that conversation isn't one she will disclose. not in such a nice day. her smile broadens as she notices the transformation of the surroundings. the sterile white room people gathered abruptly dissolves into a countryside road. lush green bushes and woods frame the rudimentary, rural road they traverse. her eyes flit around to enjoy the sight, listening to the chirps of birds and the buzzing of insects. ]
Do you have memories of all your previous lifetimes?
[ her head whirls to gaze at him once more, brows lifted in amazement. she knows reincarnation is a belief held in the country that she was born, although her personal chosen religion doesn't share it, she has no reason to disbelieve this. the world - worlds - is so vast and full of limitless possibilities.
listening to his vivid recollections make her wonder if those memories somehow make him feel detached from his fellow men after he became part of them. she listens without interrupting him or interjecting, but a question forms in her head. how did he meet his end in that lifetime? did it haunt him in the next?
she lifts her brief downcast gaze to face his answer, lips ]
No, that will be fine. Let us instead stay by the shore for now. Don't pay attention to this sudden nostalgia, please. [ she really appreciates his words and offers, almost as he tries to sabotage his claim of lacking kindness. she extends her arm to point at the sky above them. ] It's a little too far and high from us. [ she explains with a light shake of her head. Besides, even if they find an ancient spacecraft buried at the bottom of the sea, the home she knew is long gone. ] And right now, abandoned. What made it home were the people who lived with me.
no subject
[ strokes of blue paint the sky, the greenery feathered and delicate. oak trees and lilies, a river that runs to the east, azure shining brilliantly; hares and deer that skitter and scout in the shadows. it was a woodland familiar to him- a woodland he knew well. it must be why -- this world is shifting in accordance to his intuition. ]
...Yes. They are my brothers. [ his march does not slow, until he has turned to face her and her arm is outreached towards the sky. a wary glance is cast before he turns for the river. ] I lived there, as well -- in the vast space of the universe. I was machine, then. Much of humanity had perished; and so they would create pawns such as myself to serve them in submission. [ a raise of the hand. there is little inclination of sorrow in his voice; only a tint bitterness punctuating it. there is something there, buried deep beneath his skin, eager to break free. it stays in his throat and dies. ]
...Your loss must be great. [ a beat, no face in sight. he does not want her to catch sight of the ember of curiosity flickering in his eyes, a flame that could grow bigger at any moment. ] ...Had it been death that claimed them? Or were it loneliness that claimed you?
no subject
Perhaps a topic change would benefit us? Did you ever have a favorite pastime? Ah, a "hobby" before becoming the Demon Lord, Odio?
[ the old subject was too gloomy. and lilith prefers not to be the main discussed topic of discussion. the scenery is lovely to the point of near distraction; her breath hitches when she sees the hare halting their grassy lunch to lift their heads and watch them pass by. she smiles impishly at the sight of their wary, glassy eyes and ears standing up alert. it looks like those idyllic storybook illustrations in the UNASF's digital library. it fills her with a bittersweet feeling, knowing that most of the earth was polluted irreversibly by the armageddon means the destruction of many landscapes similar to this one.
she's not so distracted not to hear him clearly, or pay attention to the implications of his words. pawns. servitude. she looks expressionless as she takes the news. she had thought before who he reminded her of, but--
...
it may be a metaphor for harsh training and indoctrination instead of being engineered in a research complex. but, she is curious enough to ask. ]
By any chance, do you mean that humans created you to be their tool?
[ she can hear the bitterness in his voice. it's subtler than his previous anger. in the worst-case scenario, he's burying his resentment inside his heart. ]
Ah, no. [ she quickly assures him with a headshake. her gaze returns to the road as the march continues, and she makes another pause to elaborate on why the longing is still a similar loss. ] The three of them are alive. [ they are a difficult lot to kill. those three, and lilith too. as she's talking about today's weather, lilith finishes with a mild tone. ] But we are on opposite sides of a conflict.
so sorry for the delay -- it's been a hectic week!
[ a soldier -- a knight. a remnant of his past. it trickles into his stream of consciousness like the river they teeter on the edge of. it is a vibrant blue, glimmering beneath the sun's rays, barely catching the ambers of his eyes. ] Tell me of your own. For I am certain you possess more mirth than I.
[ he shifts the topic onto her, growing uncomfortable with his recognition of the self. the verdant woods strike him with a longing for a past that far out of reach, for a home, and he attempts to shake the feeling off on their pursuit to a much grander sight: the sea.
odio blinks, shoulders shifting slightly at her question. ]
Yes. An "AI" -- a machine that would behave and act in accordance to their whims. However -- my flesh and steel forms posed little difference, in the end. Men will suppress and chain their own kin all the same. 'Tis a fraction of what I have lived.
[ from the corner of his eye, he maintains a steady observation of her features. ] War, then. [ a wave of the hand. ] War will divide unlike any other -- a conquest for power. It leaves bloodied wounds in its wake, tearing apart brothers and sisters, lovers and friends. [ a beat. ] What was it then -- the position you took upon yourself? You appear not to be inclined to slaughter.
[ on the contrary, she seems the type to play the role of the diplomat. perhaps that is why she forsook her loved ones; it is a role stronger than any lord, any general's, but it will inevitably end in heartbreak, he thinks. ]
it's fine!
[ she is satisfied with his answer, even if he denies having any past time. her query unburied a piece of the past he wants to forget, clothed with a new title. as long as he still remembers, his humanity lingers even if it's just a fragment. her eyes cease to study him to face the onward path that gets lost between two mirrored tall hills. ]
Ah, it may be blasphemous to say this [ again, he scurries to return her curiosity with his. slippery of him. she doesn't begrudge his desire to hide. perhaps she should be less intrusive. her right hand brushes the exquisitely carved silver rosary that hangs heavily around her neck. ] -but I think my religion might be the closest that many would qualify as a 'pastime.'
[ there were little allowances they could do, aside from reading (and some material needed to be approved beforehand). cooking for her loved ones would have been good. but their supplies on mars were limited to freeze-dried provisions that wouldn't spoil in space.
...
so he was made by the hands of men or was in one of the lives he reminisces. lilith is quiet, knowing he isn't entirely incorrect, although a fatalistic sweeping view of humans may not be accurate either. generalizations are dangerous. ]
I wonder, Odio, were you ever happy in your memories?
[ she tentatively asks, still facing the road. she allows him privacy in his reaction. it doesn't have to be perfect bliss. but even during a hard work day, you celebrate your small triumphs. that sort of mundane sense of contentment is born of the simplest gestures like being wished goodnight by a close friend or companion. ]
Yes, war. [ her murmur is firm and distant. her face is serious but not guarded. ] My world barely recovered from one war to spark another so soon. [ she sighs wearily at the poor choices of the fellow returners. each has a different objective in waging that needless conflict. seth who thinks they are superior to humans, so they have the right to rule over them. abel, oh abel, whose broken trust led him to slay millions to try to pretend he isn't hurting underneath his rage. and cain with his perfect calm smile a mirror to hers--
(the enemy of the world).
...
she smiles wanly, shaking her head. she has collected a few ranks and titles, but at the core there is one truth she needs to grip. ] I'm a doctor, you see. [ she elaborates without denying anything. if she's a diplomat or a general or both too. ] I was in charge of health care. My decisions in and outside the infirmary depend on the patient's ailment.
[ she meets his gaze, hoping he understands. that the patient definition has become less narrow to the sick and needy that falls on a hospital's bed, and she has taken up her society as a large. one can dress the wounds and supply painkillers to a point in order to treat them.
...
she stops her tracks, only for a second to catch her breath. she isn't tired. no, but she caught the sound of the sea even at this distance. ]
no subject
[ even now, it drives him -- this desire to be impervious, a cut above the rest, to demand and conquer the hearts of others. but a heart is not a country, or an asset, or a thing to be caught. it is merely that exactly: the heart. he swallows down his resentment at the idea. purveys his attention to her words instead, the mind clinging to each and every one, forming a picture. reverie -- her hobby. were she not so cordial, he would scoff -- but manners are still a value in his ever expanding world. ]
It is reprieve, then. From the brutality you witness? [ he looks to the sky. ] Many would place their faith in the Gods as a form of salvation; refuge from the carnage of life. It is a selfish desire for some, and a selfless one for others. [ he eyes her rosary. ] It is peace, the greatest scarcity at all, and any human will secure it by any means. For you -- what is it?
[ he asks question upon question with the intent of understanding. for all of his flaws -- he has only ever wanted to understand. why he hurts -- why this world hurts others. the nature of love, of life and of existence.
but that understanding is an impossibility, time and time again, be it as a machine, a beast, a demon or a human. at the mention of war, he pivots slowly, facing her at the crossways. ]
A doctor. [ a beat. ] I see. To all?
[ that would be the deadliest stance to take of all. ]
...You hear it as well. [ odio closes his eyes and lets the faint rush of the tides receding against the shore thrum against his ears. ]
Then it exists after all. Let us move.
no subject
others must have subjected him to a pitiless indoctrination. theirs wasn't so different. strict regulations were necessary for the lab-raised leaders of a colonization project where humanity's future was at stake. though all of them had their little rebellions. hers was more subtle in contrast to abel's indomitable temper and insistence to reject any orders.
has his heart never wavered? she studies his face and thinks he's lost in the past again. she doesn't care about what others want him to be, but now-- ]
For what purpose do you continue to hold onto that, Odio?
[ power isn't the same as strength. nor is might. this way of life might be like shackles that still hold him from being truly free. however, his policy mustn't be as strict. if he truly had this steel resolve to search only military strength, humoring her to join this beach incursion wouldn't bring him closer to that goal. perhaps he lacks a bit of self-awareness that he has sabotaged his routine. she hopes he indulges in more "wasteful" journeys with others when he meets and makes new friends. he has awkward mannerisms, but he's been polite to a fault. if he ceases bringing up how much he hates humanity, he may forge lasting bonds.
she furrows her brows when he questions the reason for her faith. there are not a single reason, but multiple ones, ever-changing since she requested this custom-made rosary to her caretakers to take with her on the mission. she looks down at the silver cross and begins. ]
The religion I follow only believes in the existence of one God. A single Creator who incarnated among people to live as a mortal man. [ she knows he is likely not interested in evangelization, but he will find the answer he seeks and the one she wants to give him. ] He taught his followers to love their peers and to treat them how they wished to be loved and treated. [ her eyes flit to the road again, leaving a few beats of silence. it is so simple. basic human kindness. ] Eventually, he was betrayed, tortured, and executed, but -in his death throes- he forgave humanity and cleansed their sins.
[ there is more of christianity, many of them terrible, but at the core, lilith thinks of a world that takes a look at the idea of a god who does not wish sacrifices and preaches human kindness as the way of life, then... ]
Whether this man was God or not, it's a matter of personal faith. [ she smiles warmly, eyes drifting back to odio's face to watch his response. ] I want to believe in his message.
[ there was no place of faith in the sterile walls of the laboratory. made by science, raised and educated with the best scientific research available, the four of them were never inclined to any spiritual pursuits, yet she let that sway her heart this way. perhaps it helped her forgive and be thankful to be made. she hopes someday, abel finds the same solace too.
her smile broadens at his question. ]
If the patient accepts my help. [ she answers mildly. ] Respecting their autonomy is part of the Hippocratic oath we pledge.
[ methods, then, can vary. doctors can be surgeons too. ]
I do. [ her chest clenches as she recognizes the waves crashing on this shore. it's similar to the footage of nature they took to mars. all those sounds and images helped to relieve the stress of those on the mission. but none of the records got her feet itching to rush toward the place. the sensation she experiences is a unique thrill of anticipation. ] Y-Yes. [ she clears her throat and calms the unwise delight. ] It would be nice to reach the beach before the sun sets.
no subject
so he lies. ] I will make the world yield to my desire; I will right this wrongness. [ a juvenile dream, better suited to a child than a man. even dreaming had posed its difficulty to him; and yet he does in earnestness, out of fear of oblivion. his features steel, like he is carefully encasing a well kept secret behind layers of teeth and flesh and skin. he does not let her see him, and in his desire to be unseen, vulnerability projects through the nothingness. he will always be trapped in the past. he is the past.
but he is wordless as she speaks, eyes shifting slightly as he ponders the prospect. ] Much of religion is founded on principles of love, and faith and tranquilty. [ a beat. ] And yet humans would betray them for their own purposes; sanctifying greater men and women in their pursuit for power. You are different, then. [ he'd been a religious man himself, once -- a devout follower of christian principles. his home would become a dominion of hatred, and he would subvert himself into the antithesis of faith while demanding it. he speaks from a place of understanding -- and hypocrisy, eyes still hard, lips sealed tightly. ]
...To have faith. It is the most basic desire of all. I suppose you are quite human, at heart.
[ it isn't laced with resentment -- there is an inkling of bemusement there, perhaps grounded in fondness. when she smiles, he blinks for a long moment and turns his face away, finding that inspires something with him -- perhaps a spark of joy, the joy of making someone smile at all. ]
You are attentive, and oozing with empathy. [ for a second, he sounds as if he is going to roll his eyes. instead-- ] The makings of a skilled doctor. 'Twould not astound me, were you to save the lives of many.
[ but then he hears the excitement straining her voice and a hint of an arrogant smile bursts forth. he walks, pace quickening ever so slightly, sword at his back. ]
Then let us hurry. It is within our grasp. We shan't miss it.
no subject
[ she asks softly, as a benevolent means to entreat more and more to pry with the utmost courteous gesture. because she wants him to know she cares to learn, but she is also mindful of his privacy.
there is no immediate reaction to the religious topic. silence meets his recollection of what might be the judgment of historical accounts that repeat themselves across societies. she has read about those too. the crusades, the inquisition, the witch hunts, the schism, and other conflicts. but fights break in even without a cross as a banner. cruelty may spark without quoting the holy book to sanctify their rites. she doesn't overlook any of this, it would be irresponsible not to acknowledge the lengths mankind goes to destroy itself.
yet most of the time, she thinks they only wish to live happily and prosper- ]
...Do I? [ he catches her off guard once more. she has been mulling how to respond to his harsh assessment of religious practice when he called her human. oh, she looks bewildered with a slightly jaw-slacked expression, hand reaching unconsciously to grasp her heart. it's just a few beats before she recovers quickly to smile broadly again, warmer than before, if more awkward. ] I suppose you might be right. [ even if he contradicted himself. he started accusing humans of greed and religious violence, then said she was different and concluded she was human at heart. nevertheless, she doesn't point this out. it may be part of his conflicting feelings toward humans. it reveals more of himself than any evasive answers. ] Don't you desire the same?
[ her query isn't inquiring after any particular dogmatic attachment, but the basic longing that may linger in his heart. faith and hope rarely fade, even in the face of adversity.
she picks up her pace to match his when he starts to hurry. her mood lightly sprinkled with the alien bubbliness of expectation. she doesn't know what to do with it first. it lights up her eyes with an odd childlike wonder she never had (perhaps did, but she left it behind those clean, sterile quarters assigned as her first home). she almost wants to tell him that they can take their time -- that the sea won't dry out before they reach it. she doesn't and speeds up slightly. she owes him a previous commentary on his doctor remark. ]
Do you object to making a hospital our next stop? [ she suggests mildly; her calm gaze drifting from the blue that appears closer than ever to his face as they stroll. he sees the world full of selfishness and malice. the hospital gives an example to that from the injured who arrive, but simultaneously, it could show him the dedication to fight that off from a dedicated staff. ]
very belatedly...!
[ but the reaction he coaxes out of her next is a testament to the very same humanity he had spoken of, and he feels a glimmer of gratitude flicker in the echoes of his heart. for what, he has little idea -- the entirety of this interaction brews confusion within the depths of his mind, familiar sensations and emotions bubbling to the surface, but he is quick to quash them as they arise. company is not something he should grow used to; he stares straight ahead, eyes boring into the cerulean shore that grows closer in sight through the stripes of tree branches and greenery. ]
No. [ he answers plainly, the soles of his sabatons crunching through the grass. ] Destruction is my will. When the world has reduced to nothing, can it be born anew again. [ his shoulders tense. ] I am a demon, the antithesis of faith. [ and yet he demands it; it is necessary for him to exist at all. ] Your faith would condemn me by nature of my existence. A demon is what allows God to deliver judgement -- the evil that must be eradicated in the vision of holiness.
[ but the blues of the tide only grew deeper, drawing back into the sand like a blanket of silk, and his head darts back to look at her -- somehow, there is an inkling of excitement brightening his expression, although he would be swift to deny it. ]
We have arrived. The sea draws near. [ the mention of a hospital makes him blink, somewhat owlishly. ] As you wish. I shall serve as your envoy. For the meantime -- let us partake in this sight.
[ the sun has yet to set. it seems as if they'd made it in time. light ripples against the water, the sand lush beneath his feet. the waves rise and fall like the steady beat of a heart, crashing with such zeal, and the air is crisp against his face -- the feeling of humanity seeps into the cornerstone of his mind. he looks to her, watching carefully, and for a moment -- you would think he were at peace. ]
What say you?
same!!
[ she answers with the same maddingly calm she usually carries in everything she does (those hurried footsteps to the beach were but an unexpected disharmony in her usual serenity). lilith is gazing back at him as he keeps his eyes fixed on the lovely landscape flanking them. she'll return to admire the trees, bushes, and hills that paint a lovely scenery later. he's her priority in this journey. ]
It means that I wish to know many aspects that some people [ probably him as well. ] may dismiss as trivial such as your favorite color. [ she makes a short pause as her gaze slowly drifts away to the road ahead once more. ] And those subjects that others may judge as more important.
[ her brows lift again. will he be satisfied with that answer? she finds very little difference between "trivial" and "important" when she is close to someone. many things could be learned from preferences like color, music, and flavors. cain likes spicy food. abel with his ever sweet-tooth. seth that takes after both twins. finally, lilith prefers subtle flavors. those were peculiarities that run with everyone.
his resigned fate in the world destruction doesn't make her miss a step; she keeps walking, a sad smile almost a fixture on her features. ]
How can the world be reborn anew after a great devastation? Who will perform that if you don't believe in a higher existence? [ she asks gently. no time to judge his aspirations. she hasn't known him enough to give the condemnation he believes a demon earned. she has no holiness in her, even if they proclaimed her a saint. ]
I have witnessed my world nearly collapsing. [ her clear voice becomes quieter for a moment. she doesn't look in pain, but it's because the memory has dulled. it has been difficult to return to Earth and witness the wasteland of corpses and pollution. it was even harder to lead those trudging in the mud to steer them toward a new age. ] And the only ones who can rebuild it again are survivors.
[ she opens her mouth to almost ask the question that lingers unspoken. a demon destroys, but mayhaps...he is chasing after the 'thereafter'? the revival of land where he could belong? her chest tightens for him. he sounds like a stray lamb, blind to his heart and only clinging tightly to his hatred to continue this thorny path by choice. so very young despite his age. so very like abel. even if she spoke up, the sight of the cerulean horizon would have immediately silenced her.
gold and blue spread before her, with occasional strokes of white in the shape of soft clouds and bubbling foam. she's jaw-lacked with her eyes widening at the first-hand experience of a sea in peacetime. it looks endless. her skin prickles at the memory she doesn't possess. perhaps a primal part of all lifeforms that reminds her that they come from the sea (although it's a deception for her and those of her kind). that world of no boundaries and limitless horizons. at least at first sight. many regard outer space similarly, but it's a cold graveyard of stars instead of thriving in life.
she doesn't see him watching her; she can't take her eyes away as she answers with an acknowledging nod as she struggles to find her voice to answer, and --when she finally replies-- lilith realizes she has been holding her breath. ]
It's beautiful. Thank you. [ she presses a hand against her chest and bows her head in sincere gratitude. she is glad he will follow her to a new destination after this, but lilith agrees to focus on this one for the time being. ] Y-Yes. Let's.
[ she advances toward the sea with slow, unhurried strides, unlike the ones that carried her here. her eyes dart down, catching the sight of crabs digging in and out of the sand and the variety of shells washed by the tide. she wants to remove her shoewear and feel the texture under her feet. but she resists that juvenile urge for now. she stops at the shoreline to close her eyes and take a deep breath, a peaceful sensation surprisingly spreading inside with the first intake of the salty breeze. her lids flutter open, and she glances up to look at him with a broad, content smile. ]
It's beyond my expectations. [ whispers lilith, suppressing her urge to avert her eyes to stare at the blue horizon once more. she knows what the sea looks like. she has been at the shores of many beaches to lead armies. but the sensation is opposite to those times. like a solace that doesn't hesitate. she vacillates for a moment before asking. ] Would you like to stroll on the shore or sit down here?
[ either answer is fine. she plans to unlace her sandals and remain barefoot to experience the chilly splash of the waves and the warmth of the sand underneath. ]