Dead dove, do not eat.

DYSFUNCTIONAL

Fluff's boring. Overdone. Forget that, let's play ships that affect everyone involved for the worse, not better.

How to Play
- Comment with your character's name, canon, info, and any preferences you find relevant.
- Reply to others.
- Respect boundaries, even when the internet barbies aren't.

01. YOU WOULDN'T WANT ME TO HAVE TO HURT YOU TOO... The object of your love/lust is resisting your advances, so it's time to take what you want.
02. JEALOUSY. It's jealousy to the extreme. You're going to make damn sure your lover knows how you feel about them seeing other people.
03. INCEST IS BEST. You know it's wrong, all kinds of sinful, but you can't resist the draw. If characters aren't related, then they are now! Or at least it feels very close to incest anyway.
04. YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GET FAR. You love that person so much, you've made sure they can't get away - by physically tying them down or by some other emotional or mental means.
05. I'LL MAKE YOU HURT. You've set it up to make sure your lover catches you cheating or doing something else hurtful just for that reason. You want to make them suffer.
06. CHAINS AND WHIPS EXCITE ME. You're both taking sex to extremes.
07. BROKEN. Your lover has utterly broken you and you need them to know.
08. SECRECY. You're embarrassed by your lover, utterly embarrassed. If they weren't useful in some way (even if it's just in bed!), you wouldn't even be with them.
09. YOU'RE MY LAST CHOICE. You don't really love the person you're with, but they're all you could snatch up and it's no secret to either of you.
10. FORCED TOGETHER. You don' love each other, but you have no choice but to be together due to outside influences. Alternatively, you've been captured and are now being forced to make a sex video even if you don't want to.
11. WATCH HOW I DO IT. You were just forced to watch your lover have sex with someone else (willingly or not) or beaten and now you've got to deal with the aftermath.
12. IF YOU ONLY KNEW. You're not who your lover thinks or you've got a lot of deep dark secrets that, if they only knew, they'd hate you forever.
13. NOT WHO I WAS. Maybe your lover was replaced with a pod person or they're under brainwash or something, but you know they're not who they were.
14. LOVE POTION XXX. You couldn't resist it anymore. You needed your lover, so you've drugged them into loving and wanting you too.
15. THREATS. This person isn't with you willingly. They're only putting up with you because you've threatened them into doing so.
16. FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT.
17. NOT GOING TO SAVE YOU. Your lover is on the brink and you're just going to watch them fall. You don't care anymore.
18. HATE YOU. You need your lover to know how exactly much you hate them. You can't even touch them without your skin crawling.
19. BETRAYAL. You've betrayed your lover in some huge way and you don't care that they've found out.
20.YOUR CHOICE. choose or combine any of the choices on here or make up your own!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[nothing involving underage, incest, or bathroom stuff, please, but other than that wrench is down for things to get a little fucky. or not! not interested in playing full-on noncon from wrench, but beyond that, let's go nuts.

kinklist here!]

[ Strong preference for angst and drama over anything too graphic. But willing to plot and potentially move toward something spicy. :) ]

( yae ‘as soon as she unblocks me the marriage is back on’ miko,

nothing along the lines of underage and stuff. of the choices above: 2, 4, 5(?) or 18 maybe??? idk i just want to write her being terrible at someone. )

( i’d rather avoid noncon, ty )

Edited 2023-02-08 22:03 (UTC)

[ would love to do something messed up with a makima/other castmates; crosscanon & ocs also welcome! down for dubcon and noncon, preferably with aki on the receiving end. ]

[ Power had an idea, which meant trouble for everyone else around her.

Coming to live with Aki is an irrefutable improvement to living in the Safety Division headquarters. It's the difference between being beneath someone's thumb and at the end of their leash - the someone in this case being Makima. And while the leash was in the hands of a foster, Power's situation no longer seemed unwinnable in her mind. Makima is insurmountable, but Aki? Aki is just a man, and a mortal one at that.

This is partly, unwittingly, Denji's fault. His willingness to go to great lengths just to fondle her breasts had given Power a rather skewed perspective on what the body she possessed might be able to bring her if she played her cards right. So far the cards she's played are to refuse to bathe after their most recent bloody mission and bide her time until she can flippantly demand that, if it's such a big deal to her whining roommates, Aki can bathe her!

Now both of the humans ( well, human enough where Denji is concerned ) get to suffer in their own ways, or such is Power's thinking, and that is mana from Hell to a devil. Her eyes keep Aki in their crosshairs, her mouth a downturned little snarl as she pulls off her viscera-stained jacket in their washroom. ]

I look forward to forcing you to soak your clothes to keep up with me, Top Knot.

[ She growls, the pouty expression warping to more of a sneer. It's petty, but petty is all she really gets to have with devil hunters, though... Power finds herself less and less desiring the demise of this one in particular. Probably all the food. ]

[ Living with Power is a daily exercise in patience, one which Aki often loses spectacularly.

At first, he thought Denji was bad; but, in reality, he's just a kid who doesn't know any better. Power, though? Power is hell-bent on making Aki's life a fucking mess. There's a reason why he hates fiends and devils so much, and Power regularly reminds him of that.

The stench of blood is nothing new to him, but he's never had to live with it for days on end. It's been making it hard to eat, hard to smoke, and that's been making him even more temperamental and cranky than usual. If washing Power himself is what it takes to get things back to normal (or as normal as things can be, anyway), then he'll suck it up and get it over with. ]

Yeah, yeah. [ The frustration is evident on his face as he shrugs off his blazer and loosens his tie one-handed. He's got his sword in the room, just in case, though he's pretty sure Power wouldn't actually kill him. Makima would undoubtedly put her down for that.

...Or would she? Aki likes to think that he's important to her, but she's difficult to read. Maybe Power is higher on her list than the sad orphan boy with his cliché revenge fantasy.

Leaning forward, he turns on the water for the shower, then leans back to finish undressing as it heats up. He's been in all sorts of situations with Power at this point, so being nude in front of her isn't exactly embarrassing, but he's going to leave his pants on for the time being at the very least. That being said, as he unbuttons his shirt and slips the white fabric off of his shoulders, he becomes hyper-aware of Power's eyes on him. ]

Just don't break anything.

( my kingdom for a billy or an eddie )

The darker the better. I'd love some co-dependency throw in while we're at it.

[ The very second Rune arrives home, he avoids Ciro in order to spend time in the basement. His concentration has been on nothing but this specific spell for almost a week, and finally, he'd gotten his hands on an ingredient that had been surprisingly absent from their array of herbs and plants. If he'd cared to, he would have asked Ciro, but he had the instructions. Everything else had been time sensitive. Now, with the potion in the bowl on his workbench, all he needs to do is recite the spell and swallow its contents.

Which he does.

And shortly after, nothing happens.

The frustration is palpable in the air when he realizes it, and he sweeps everything onto the floor with a wave of his hand, the taste of flowers on his tongue. It's another hour before he finally climbs the steps to their apartment and several minutes more before he finds Ciro on the rooftop with his plants. He stands at the door watching him for a moment, a strange ache building in his chest, and when Rune moves closer, it doesn't ease up. If anything, it grows even more intense. ]

What are you doing out here? [ Asked like he doesn't know. ]

[Ciro could tell from a mile away that Rune hadn't been in the mood to deal with him. Instead of engaging and investigating what's had him in such a mood, he kept his distance and respected his space for a change. It was the least he could do to prevent another senseless fight on such a nice day. The air was cold, but the sun was out and felt good on his skin as he meditated amongst his plants.

His thoughts continue to end up on Rune, but he resists the urge to check on him. The pull of his magic was strong, but not so strong that he couldn't resist with willpower alone.

Minutes pass and just as he was ready to cave, the sound of footsteps and a familiar voice draw him out of his not-so-successful meditative state.] "Staying the fuck out of your way," I think were your words. [Did he have to change his voice to make fun/imitate the other witch? No, but it was on the less petty side of ways he wanted to respond.]

What are you doing out here?

[ As the main source of dysfunction, I'm interested only in 4, 8, 9, 10, 13, or 18 — or really anything involving Alhaitham being the worst due to being completely unemotionally available and refusing to change because he's fine on his own, he's only here as long as it's more convenient to stay than it is to leave (rational) (justifiable) (unfixable).

For mutual dysfunction, I'm open to all except 3 and 14. ]

[ would you be interested in anything? ]

[ Yeah, definitely! If there's any prompt in particular you're interested in, feel free to go for it. And if not, 8, 9, or 10 seem pretty fitting for them. Let me know what you prefer o7 ]

[ There are plenty of reasons to want to blackmail someone like Alhaitham. He's the current scribe; he carries weight in the Akademiya. Kaveh, It's humiliating, isn't it? Kaveh had simply been seeking inspiration for his project, demanding Alhaitham come along--You might as well make yourself useful. He knows he'll hear all about it, how this is his fault, how he ought to look where he's going ahead of something pretty he sees in the distance, but none of that is going to get them out of this right now.

Divested of visions and demanded to strip, this is... not what Kaveh had been expecting. The demand of their captors? ]

I'd rather die than have sex with you.

[ That's honestly not the truth; Kaveh is too young to die. He has too many grand ideas to share still, though he's been a bit stuck on those recently. This isn't the sort of inspiration he'd been seeking, and while it's not like he's a prude about things like sex, the idea of doing it with Alhaitham is truly the worst. Is this some form of pathetic entertainment?

It's intensely irritating. ]

[ Alhaitham could have considered letting the fact that Kaveh carries more of the fault that they've ended up in this situation go — Alhaitham himself could have been more careful, reacted faster, or made an attempt to escape on his own and return to help when better prepared. That would have been the most rational thing to do, and Alhaitham can admit with hindsight that it was a misstep on his part.

What he can't stop himself from being openly irritated about is the fact that Kaveh, for some reason, has the audacity to complain about the situation.

His tone when speaking with Kaveh is often short and dry, but rarely is he actually annoyed. But when he replies, his tone is sharp. ]

No, you wouldn't.

[ He'll hold back from calling Kaveh a liar and bad one at that, because that's juvenile, but it's implied clearly in the way he enunciates the words. There's no way that Alhaitham could possibly believe that Kaveh prefers the permanence of death over a much more temporary event, no matter how humiliating it might be.

Tersely, he unbuckles the strap that holds his cape up on the off-side, then pulls out the part he keeps tucked into his belt pouch and tosses the cape to the floor. The motions are both deliberate and refined, yet clearly agitated — Alhaitham's expression is still mostly unreadable, but for somebody around him as much as Kaveh is? This is as close to emotional as he ever gets. ]

Now's not the time to be senseless. You should understand clearly we aren't in a position to negotiate... and that our standings could get worse still.

[ At least they've the dignity of being left to it on their own — for the time being, at least. ]

[Anything goes except underage. If you're not sure about a scenario ask about it first.]

[ canonmates only | we can discuss! but #2 and #8 seem fun for him! ]

Zhou Zishu is one of those infuriating men that hovers above the rest of mankind. Even his crimes don't darken his name! Xue Yang first notices him, in all his glory, when he is hired by Prince Jin. All it takes is one look for his obsession to start.

Sneaking something special into Zishu's drink isn't easy. He works harder on that than the mission the Prince gives him! But finally - finally! - Zishu drinks it. Xue Yang is planning on walking into the room and locking the door behind him. Behind them.

But one of those damn disciples gets there first. Scowling, teeth bared, Xue Yang has to make a mess to draw the young man back out. Then he, barely, slips into Zishu's rooms. There.

He locks the doors.

He'd noticed Xue Yang. Of course he had. Even without the young man having been hired by his cousin, the danger and manic energy that surrounds him had drawn Zishu's attention - though he's made a point not to let it show. Even more so by how often he feels Xue Yang watching him.

He shares meals with his cousin only when it's insisted on - otherwise he far more prefers a quieter meal with those immediately under him. Tonight? His cousin had insisted. It meant his attention was divided, just enough for someone to add something special to his drink. He noticed that, too, but too late to stop himself from drinking.

Inwardly cursing, he has just enough presence of mind to excuse himself and to retreat to his rooms. Of course he is swiftly followed, but he's already starting to wave Han Yin away when a mess is made and the other reluctantly goes to deal with it as Zishu takes a seat.

Then the doors close behind someone else. Xue Yang.

And lock.

He frowns, working hard to ignore the sudden, burning heat that the other's appearance brings rushing through him. He's used to ignoring longing looks, after the number of those who had shared his bed only to make it clear they were just using him for his power, for his position in court.

"I did not invite you here," he states sharply. Even if his body aches.

He is tired of men lording over him and pretending like they're so much better than him. They're not! Xue Yang wouldn't think anything of playing this trick on Prince Jin himself, but he isn't attracted to him. Zhou Zishu on the other hand is everything he likes all in one, annoyingly perfect package.

Han Yin might return and panic, but why should he care? Xue Yang crosses the space between Zishu and him and smirks.

"Do I look like I give a damn?" he looks over Zishu, his gaze hot and hungry, "What's my name?"

Is he important enough to stand out in Zishu's mind?

It's obvious what Xue Yang wants. Has been from the beginning of the other's employment.

In truth, Zishu wouldn't mind expelling turbulent energy with the other. But the real fun is the fighting, to see who was stronger or needier. The physical imperfections he can see on Xue Yang only enhance the other's beauty, in his opinion.

He allows himself a very slight smirk and tilts his head, making a show of sweeping his gaze over Xue Yang's body as if he needs a proper look to think of a name. "Should I know it?" Of course he knows it. He knows the name of everyone in his organization, and those clever and skilled enough around him.

Like Xue Yang.

"Are you always this obvious with someone you want to fuck?" Crude words that might shock those of court. Not that he cares. These are his rooms.

Why be subtle? What a waste of time! Either way, he will work to get what he wants. And of course he is always up for a good spar! Jiangzai is just up his sleeve~

Does he meet the great Zhou Zishu's standards? Xue Yang isn't ashamed of what he has to offer, scars and all. He smiles, sharply, at the taunt and leans in closer, his hair falling against his cheeks.

"You should! I was introduced to you, wasn't I? Don't tell me you're forgetful." his features harden, "Am I too far beneath you?"

If that's the case, he will leave his mark on the man. Then Zishu won't be able to forget him again.

"Sure." he laughs, the sound childish, unhinged, "I like you. You're sexy. Isn't that a compliment?"

The lack of subtlety is a balm, really. A relief. Here is someone not afraid to take what he wants. To work for it.

He likes, even, the edge to that smile, even when the handsome features go hard and dangerous. He likes that danger and it does nothing to make him afraid. However he doesn't like the implication that he looks down on Xue Yang, and his eyes narrow before lowering to the hand he'd noticed from the start. That left hand, braced.

He doesn't ask before reaching for it.

"And what does Xue Yang know of Zhou Zishu?"

His gaze remains hard as he lifts it back up. "Or are you like everyone else who seeks my bed for my power and position? If that is all you care about, leave." Even if his body yearns for their clothes to disappear in a whirlwind and to press together with the lithe Xue Yang. He's used to ignoring his own wants.

What a stupid thing to fear! Of course he knows what he wants. Dark eyes follow every motion Zhou Zishu makes; every breath he takes. He is a starving creature, panting after a long hunt. Come on, take some pity on the gremlin~

But not like that! He twitches and flinches, moving away from the hand reaching for that hand. The ugly one. The one that reminds him of how nasty the world can be.

"What do I need to know?" he asks suspiciously, trying to read the expression behind those hard eyes.

Then he laughs, loudly, and uses his good hand to grab Zishu's chin in a firm grip.

"I don't want those things. Revenge is what I want, Zishu, and you can't give me that either. I have to acquire it on my own." so that leaves, "This is simple. Strip." he snaps his fingers and suddenly Zishu's robes are flying off.

Something nameless flashes behind his eyes at how Xue Yang flinches away from his touch. It's obvious Xue Yang has been badly treated, even if he hadn't dug into what his people have managed to uncover about him.

Zishu could avoid the hand that grabs for his chin, but he doesn't move. He allows the grip as he studies the handsome man. Listens to the loud laughter, almost manic and distracting.

Revenge. His eyes narrow at being told he can't give that to Xue Yang. But he believes, at least, the fact his power and position aren't what brings Xue Yang to him. It's enough the trick of making his clothes fly off finally earn the younger man an amused little smirk.

He could flail about and attempt to cover himself. He doesn't. His hands settle back on folded legs...and a rather betraying arousal can be seen. Zhou Zishu is a healthy young man as well. Viril. He's aware he's likely been drugged, and senses adjusted, but it doesn't bother him.

"You've sent my clothes flying," he almost purrs. "Now what will you do about it?" He'll allow this.

Badly treated. Huh. More like violently abused! Xue Yang curls his fingers towards his palm, keeping his scarred, misshapen hand by his side. He doesn't want anyone to touch it. Then they would know... Then they would see the evidence of his worst memory.

His thumb caresses Zishu's chin as he, magically, rids the man of his clothes. Then he pulls back and admires all of that bare skin. Licking his lips slowly, his gaze finally lands on that aroused cock. Pretty~

"Mmhm, I did." he laughs lowly and tugs off his belt. Tossing it to the side, he sees to stripping off his outer robe, his inner-robe and finally his boots and trousers. Then he is as naked as Zhou Zishu!

"Feel less alone?" Xue Yang bends over Zishu, sliding a hand down his chest, "Let's go to bed."

Zishu will get what he wants. Eventually.

Some might feel uncomfortable under that intense gaze. Might shift or squirm. Zishu simply waits, the picture of patience and serenity. Even his back is perfectly straight, as if he weren't utterly bare and disarmed.

He's a weapon himself.

He lets himself watch Xue Yang remove his clothes, gaze roaming as skin is bared. More playful words, and Zishu hears himself chuckle as his gaze drops away. The hand down his chest has no business feeling so good.

A flurry of knocks interrupts them as he stands, and he glances over at the door.

"Leader!" Ah. Han Yin finished his task, or figured out it was a diversion and come to check on him. He quells the sudden irritation.

"All is well," he sends his voice to carry just enough to reach his third in command. "I am not to be disturbed tonight." Barring real emergencies that really would need his attention. But other than that?

No.

Xue Yang is aware of Zishu's abilities and they only draw him in rather than chasing him off. He likes danger. He likes dancing on the edge of a blade. Maybe he doesn't value himself, but what's the point of living if you're scared all the time?

The hand on Zishu's chest teases a nipple and then... They are interrupted. Eyes narrowing, teeth bared, Xue Yang is ready to chase Han Yin off. But it's best if Zishu sees to it.

Smirking at the tone, he gathers the other man into his arms and lays kisses down Zishu's neck.

"You've decided to play with me~?"

Neither of them are exactly innocent! Much less harmless. And neither of them really values themselves at this point, do they?

The hand teasing his chest will find his nipples hard with anticipation - this is not a man who isn't uninterested in what Xue Yang is doing. Even if his arousal wasn't proof enough!

A puff of breath answers those arms wrapping around him and he rolls his eyes at the silly words as he hears Han Yin reluctantly acknowledge his orders and retreat. And the kisses feel nice.

"I haven't tossed you out," he answers playfully. "Hold my attention, if you can." He challenges with a smirk.

[ canonically a mafia hitman and right hand man who essentially manages and runs day-to-day functions of an assassin squad made up of dangerous yet hilarious trainwrecks. enjoys all manner of seafood and duelling to the death. sword boy. shark themed. four feet of white hair. loud, vain, brave, violent, bratty, loyal to family. acts aggressive but may sub to people who impress him and/or manage to slap him around. great for angry codependency and "jokingly"-trying-to-kill-each-other "play" among others. ]

[ i'm good to au him into other canons, or our own original-ish jamjar setting. pref 20+ for shipping, don't mind age gaps (he's 22-23 in canon, can add a few years to that). m/m or m/f. not really interested in 07 or 13, rest or mishmashs are good. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Dead dove, do not eat.

DYSFUNCTIONAL

Wrench | WATCH_DOGS series | ota 18+

Claire Bennet || NBC's Heroes || OTA

yae miko / genshin impact

margaery tyrell | asoiaf/got | ota

catra | she-ra | f/f

alice liddell • american mcgee’s • ota

aki hayakawa | chainsaw man | ota

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sorry for taking so long! >< ❤️

kaveh | genshin impact

daphne kluger | ocean's 8 | ota

steve harrington • stranger things

Kishin Asura ΦΦΦ Soul Eater M/F

ciro | original

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Alhaitham 🌱 Genshin Impact

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10, let me know if this works!

works for me, thank you for starting! o/

Wynonna Earp | Wynonna Earp | OTA

Brock Rumlow | mcu | ota

carol danvers | mcu | ota

rk800 "connor" | detroit become human

suguru geto | jjk

Zhou Zishu | Word of Honor | M/M

What about a mix of 14 and 2? Xue Yang's favorites!

Yessssssssssssss

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squalo superbi // katekyo hitman reborn!