Did you pick your Tinder date to take to your awkward family Thanksgiving dinner?

[reversesock]

the tinder meme Maybe you can't find a date. Maybe you don't want to find a date. Maybe this whole thing was set up by your well-meaning friends, or your prank-playing enemies, or your over-involved mother. Whatever the reason, you're on a swipe-based dating system. Call it tinder, cuddlr, e-harmony but for shallow assholes... you're on it. What's the worst that could happen?

FORMATTING
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Comments

Melissa Foddebrat | Beware the Villainess! | OTA

[shatteredstoryline]

MELISSA FODDEBRAT Old enough to drink, but isn't it rude to ask a lady's age? Anyway, allow me to be upfront. I am the daughter of a duke and currently engaged to a prince, but he's a cheating pile of trash and refuses to annul our engagement. I am looking for someone who is willing to be my partner in order to convince him to break it off. I enjoy festival games, swordplay, and tasty food.

✓       ✕

Evelynn | K/DA Verse League of Legends | OTA

[evellain]

Elana Smith (24) Likes: Fast cars, fast food, fast people. If you recognize me, no you don't.

✓       ✕

[ For the canon unaware: Eve is part of K/DA, an international kpop sensation. People who pay enough attention to pop news would be fairly likely to recognize her, though 'Elana Smith' is a fake name for this profile. ]

quinn fabray ♔ glee

[ambitious]

Quinn Fabray ( 20 ) Former Cheerio. Lifelong dancer. Mediocre singer. Aspiring actress. Not a fan of trying to summarize myself.

✓       ✕

[ age subject to change, but i generally default to playing her post-canon. ]

Ramona Flowers ☆ Scott Pilgrim ☆ OTA

[subspaceflowers]

Ramona Flowers (25) Cooler than you, but maybe we can hang.

✓       ✕

jaskier - the witcher

[lettenhove]

Julian Alfred Pankratz (40) Viscount of Lettenhove. Bard Extraordinaire. Call me "Jaskier."

✓       ✕

[elysiumheld]

✓

[addiesands]

✓

I can relate.

[Addie’s fake name is Angela Summer, but her pictures betray her if people are aware.]

Stacia | OC | OTA

[machinesoul]

Stacia (18) Hero to all androids! By day, fighting for equality between humans and AI. By night, looking for love on the internet... or at least a fun fling.

✓       ✕

raven | teen titans

[teenwitching]

raven (18) this is pointless. give me book recommendations instead. and if there was a quota on dog photos, this app would have filled it for the next decade.

[lettenhove]

I would hope so.

[popstahri]

✓

omg Evie?? [ Ahri didn't have the foresight to just changing her identity online. Or, maybe she just didn't want to? This, of course, was a disaster waiting to happen, but she's amused to see Evelynn on here all the same. ] Did u rly pick the name "Smith"?? U kno that's super obv, right?

epel felmier(?) / twisted wonderland / m/m

[ipadmini]

Li'l Lollipop (💞) I'm a candy fairy from the Land of Sugar 💕🍭💖 Nice to meet you, everyone 🍬✨😘

✓       ✕

[inspired by the halloween 2021 event...!! cross-canon/cross-medium friendly; epel's actual age is 16.]

Myrrh | Fire Emblem 8 | OTA

[darklingdragon]

Myrrh (1200) I am the guardian of an ancient cursed forest, but the demon king imprisoned there has been slain for good. I therefore seek to venture out into the world to seek friends and companions. While I am a dragon, and therefore quite old for my appearance, I am very happy to befriend humans or otherwise who are not so long-lived. I do not yet know what activities I most enjoy, so I'm willing to try almost anything once!

✓       ✕

[evellain]

To my Wendy's problem, or one of the other bits?

[evellain]

I don't care that people know it's fake, I just don't want my name on it. *You* know how annoyed our management could get with you, right?

[ Of course, that was one of the perks in being largely self-managed... but they did pay people to theoretically keep their names in the rags to a minimum. Not that she was one to judge for such a mishap. ]

[addiesands]

Definitely the Wendy’s problem. Fries and frosties are everything.

But also the being mistaken for someone we obviously are not.

elia martell | asoiaf | ota

[veryfond]

elia martell (30) My friends made me get this, and I don't really know what I'm doing.... but maybe we can be confused together? I have two kids, and they're my whole world. I enjoy morning coffee, an evening glass of wine, and trying something new. Also have pictures of my cute pet, which I think is what everyone really wants to see on these things.

✓       ✕

[evellain]

[ That left Evelynn curious... but not curious enough to do the exact thing she didn't want anybody else doing. ]

Sounds like we're both cheap dates, then.

Titus Alexius / Magi / OTA

[wearingguess]

Titus Alexius (18; 5; 271) High priest of Reim; in a sense, a type of moth; co-guardian of one; master of composite and defensive magic; phat ass. Let us engage in any combination of chatting, becoming friends, growing closer, and hooking up!

✓       ✕

✓

[darklingdragon]

A moth?

Is phat anything like fat?

[popstahri]

Huh?? Oh, uh, sure. But I can just claim it's a social experiment. I was hoping maybe to find some sweet arm candy since holidays are coming up. I have a lot of photoshoots to prepare for...

[addiesands]

I’ve always been more interested in good company over a price tag.

Asmodeus, Avatar of Lust 💋 Obey Me! 💋 OTA

[lustfulcharm]

Asmodeus As the Avatar of Lust, I can make any fantasy come true. A wild night of passion or a week of slow build-up that culminates with the most mind-blowing satisfaction: whatever contents your heart the most! Not looking for a long-term commitment since I'm a gift meant to be shared with the world, but that doesn't mean we can't get to know each other and enjoy some time together! Parties, bar hopping, a cozy café... Any place can be made into a paradise of intimacy.

✓       ✕

[evellain]

Well, if you wanted me to be armcandy, you could've just asked.

[evellain]

Smart.

So, you've seen my three favorite things-what are you in to?