bakerstreet | midnight textings

[Aziraphale has had letters delivered to him by bird before, but an owl is a first for him. He carefully unties the ribbon and reads the letter, then pens a quick reply on his own stationery.]

I have a tailor on Savile Row.

How did you train an owl to deliver your mail?

[He ties the letter to the owl just as carefully and sends it off with a polite 'mind how you go'.]

[ Is it bizarre that Lockhart spotted this complete stranger and send his owl after him? Yes. But is it worth it because of how WONDERFUL he'll look in a cream suit? Also yes. ]

Why thank you, I bough- I painstakingly trained Periwinkle to deliver all my letters myself. Incredible, isn't it?

Savile Row... I've heard of that before. I do need a cream suit with a bow tie, you know. I was rather jealous of you!

[The next letter back will be slightly delayed as Aziraphale dotes on Periwinkle for a minute or two.]

It is very incredible! She's a lovely bird.

Savile Row is located in Mayfair, there are a number of good tailors there. And there's no need to be jealous, you can acquire a cream suit and bow tie easily enough. Mine is vintage, but the classics are always in fashion.

[Yes, it is bizarre, but it's also nice to have once sense of style appreciated. Whoever this person is, they have good taste.]

Are you in London, as well? Is that where you saw me?

[ Periwinkle is ready to switch owners, honestly. One can only deliver so many Gilderoy Lockhart photographs... speaking of which, there's definitely one included with the third letter, showing a class being taught by a man who can only be described as... very shiny.

Everything probably makes sense now. They're sort of... kindred style spirits, aren't they? ]

I think she rather likes you! Mayfair... Mayfair, I don't think that's where I am, though I am in London. I am currently in Covent Garden, having tea and sweets. [ He's planning on telling the Muggles he's a school teacher. It's not even much of a fib! Sadly they can't read his books so he can't be a famous author here, oh dear... but he'll always have his looks to brag about. ]

[Yes, that photograph does explain a lot. Aziraphale has not dressed that shiny since the late 1700s, but he can appreciate the sort of look this man is going for.]

I like her, too, I'm very fond of animals. Savile Row is not far at all from Covent Garden. If you like, I could meet you where you are and show you the way.

[Any mention of tea and sweets makes Aziraphale peckish. Also, he's curious about a human who dresses so distinctively and has a trained owl. Oh, maybe he's a magician! An owl would be an impressive addition to any magic act.]

What a marvelous idea! I'll even save you some of these macarons. Periwinkle loves them as well, you know.

[ It's difficult to pinpoint the man's foppish style as it seems to have everything flashy, from several time periods, thrown together. Most wizards would wear a Muggle disguise but Lockhart thinks he's so fashion forward that he believes he can get away with it. Oh, he can't wait to go shopping with his new stylish friend!

He's sitting there with his tea and his small pastries, definitely not looking like any modern day human. He could easily be a magician or a time traveler, even. ]

[Owls can eat macarons? Aziraphale gives Periwinkle a bemused look before giving her one last letter to deliver.]

How kind of you to share! I'll be there shortly, I just need to close up my shop. See you soon.

[Aziraphale arrives in about fifteen minutes, traveling the mundane way (by foot) and wearing the same outfit that caught Lockhart's eye. It's easy enough to spot the other man, and the angel takes a moment to note how differently he is dressed from everyone else. Aziraphale's style is also different, of course, especially in the sea of jean-wearing tourists and sharply dressed businesspeople. But Lockhart stands out in a way that does seem out of time, or perhaps a different reality entirely.]

Hello there!

[He approaches Lockhart's table with a wave and a friendly smile.]

My name is Aziraphale, by the way. A pleasure to finally meet you in person, Mister...?

Gilderoy Lockhart! Excuse me, Az... Azirap... what? [ Azira...phale? How exotic! That must be a common Muggle name. He holds his hand out. ]

Your suit looks wonderful up close as well, my dear fellow! [ Periwinkle instantly helps herself to a macaron while Gilderoy cheerfully shakes hands. ]

Do tell. Is it true that I am more handsome in person? [ This is why he doesn't have any friends. ]

Aziraphale. It's an old name.

[Aziraphale is used to having his name tripped over, although it's a little surprising coming from a man named Gilderoy. Nevertheless, he shakes the man's hand congenially, flattered by the compliment.]

Thank you, it's one of my favorites.

[Up close, Lockhart might notice a bit of wear around the buttons of Aziraphale's waistcoat, as well as the hem, but only because it is so well-loved. The jacket itself is pristine.

The angel's gaze flicks to the macarons (huh, Periwinkle does like them, doesn't she?) before returning to Gilderoy in a sort of confused stare.]

Er... I'm afraid I'm already spoken for, old boy.

[Because someone doesn't ask after their own looks unless they're flirting, right? Aziraphale is trying to be more cognizant of that, for Crowley's sake.]

But I'd still very much enjoy your platonic company, if you'll have me.

[ Flirting? Lockhart goes on about his own looks to just about anyone! It's unsure where his preferences lie though he does come off, very, flirtatious. He's probably after compliments, no matter who they're from. ] Don't be silly, my dear fellow! My female fans would be heartbroken.

[ Oh... he shouldn't have mentioned having fans. Ah, well, it's obvious anyone this excellent should have them. A wink. ]

You know, I'd like some company! No one knows me here and I've been a little lonely. The... school I teach has a holiday so I've been send off. [ Muggles have schools, don't they? ]

[Aziraphale looks both relieved and a touch mortified that he misinterpreted the other man's vanity.]

Oh! Well... jolly good, then. Mustn't disappoint your fans.

[Eager to move past any potential awkwardness, he takes a seat at Lockhart's table and helps himself to a macaron. Only then does he try to work out the puzzle of how a teacher (or professor, possibly?) can have fans.]

I see. What are you a teacher of? Have you published on the subject?

Oh no, that wouldn't do at all! I shouldn't go around making my own fans cry, should I? [ Gilderoy also takes a macaron, a pink one, and takes an especially manly bite. No dainty nibbles. Not for Gilderoy Lockhart, ladies' man.

But then the awkwardness is forgotten as he freezes up in fear. Well, he is a Professor but he teaches Defense Against the Dark Arts, a wizard class for wizards, you know. So he can't tell him.

Instead he comes up with the least convenient lie of all time. ]

I am a famous mathematics professor, I've written many important books on the subject! [ A smarter liar would've said, you know. English. Because he speaks and writes it so well. Or theatre. Or art. Or anything not having to do difficult math. ]

[The Fates must be smiling upon Gilderoy Lockhart today, because it just so happens that mathematics is one of the few fields that Aziraphale is unfamiliar with. English? Theater? Art? Poor Lockhart would have been found out in a second. But aside from the classics, the angel does not know much about the subject, or who might be famous within it.]

Mathematics! Oh, my, that's very impressive. I'm afraid that I'm not much of an academic when it comes to maths, although I do have a few of the classics in my bookshop. You must be very popular, to have fans.

[Aziraphale's knowledge of pop culture is even worse, but he's pretty sure that humans today don't generally fawn over mathematicians, famous or otherwise.]

To be honest, I thought you might have been a magician, because of your well-trained owl.

[ Lady Luck still fancies him, does she! Excellent. Gilderoy clasps his hands together with another bright smile. ] Oh, yes! Though I believe it isn't so much the math as it is my charming smile. [ Just ignore the narcissism. He can't go three seconds without complimenting himself but is decent company otherwise.

At magician he instantly freezes up, though. The smile fading so quickly it's worrying. ] Well no. No. The owl is... a common way to transport letters, isn't it?

How do people send letters here? [ Ehm. This lie is becoming a little obvious, now. He's not in his usual form because he keeps daydreaming about how incredible he'll look in his fancy new suit! Not the brightest, this wizard isn't exactly Merlin, he can only focus on so many things at once. ]

[It's not the most raging case of vanity that Aziraphale has ever been witness to, but it's certainly up there. As character flaws go, however, it's easy enough to ignore, or at least not encourage, although the angel does worry if he's offended Lockhart at all with his magician comment.]

Er... not to my knowledge, no. This is the first owl I've ever seen do so.

[Where on Earth does this man teach? Aziraphale twists the signet ring around his pinky before taking another macaron.]

By post, typically... ah, I hope I didn't put you off with my magician remark, I meant it as a compliment. I practice it for fun, and I used to have a dove in my act...

[Although the less said about poor Lazarus, the better. Maybe it's not so strange that Gilderoy doesn't know how the mail normally works. Mathematicians can be an eccentric bunch.]

[ Despite being so vain, he's not especially easy to offend. Always cheerful and good-natured, most insults and other comments go right over his head! Aziraphale must've noticed the giddiness by now. ]

Oh... well... yes... but you're probably not familiar with the Scottish school I teach at, now are you? It's very common there!

[ He does chuckle nervously. Magician is too close to wizard for anyone's comfort. He decides to attempt and detour the conversation. ]

Doves are marvelous but I'm more a peacock kind of fellow, why, I use a peacock quill to do ALL my writing. [ He's... not even a little good at fitting in with Muggles, is he? But most wizards struggle with that, though the younger generation tends to look and behave more ordinarily. But then he realizes.

It dawns on him. This man must be a wizard as well! He's just being playful. Pretending not to recognize him! ] Is the dove your patronus? [ Gilderoy no. ]

[Gilderoy is certainly pleasant enough company, even if the conversation has gone a little strange. When he mentions the location of his school, Aziraphale's expression brightens into a fond smile.]

Scotland! How lovely, I haven't been there in... well, over a decade at least. I'll have to remedy that soon.

[Just as he's distracted from all this post by owl business, the other man brings up peacocks and their quills. Another quirk of a professor, the angel thinks to himself as he nibbles on his macaron.

He's about to reply that while peacocks are beautiful, they are a lot harder to stuff up one's sleeve for a magic act. But then Lockhart asks a question that returns the quizzical look to Aziraphale's face. A patronus? It makes him think of his time in Rome, but a dove as one's patron? That question doesn't make any sense.]

Er... no?

[Aziraphale pulls out a handkerchief and wipes the macaron crumbs from his fingers. There is something not quite muggle-like about him that Lockhart might be picking up on, so assuming he's a wizard isn't entirely off the mark.

(And for the record, if he had a patronus, it'd be a snake.)]

I am very fond of doves and their symbolism, of course, as birds of peace. I had a rabbit in my act, too, but an owl would be even more impressive.

We should meet up there! Have a drink together. [ Gilderoy winks. His own patronus would surely be ANOTHER Gilderoy Lockhart. If not that, probably a peacock. Despite all the wizarding world-related faux passes he'd made, Aziraphale hardly seems to notice, which only makes the him think that the other fellow must be another wizard.

The magic act thing is surely a clever way to hide the truth from prying muggles. ]

Oh... I'm very peaceful as well, I find war much too unpleasant, though I'd surely win if I ever joined one. [ But they're ever so scary. And worst of all, messy! Lockhart enjoys a comfortable life with no too many frightening things happening. But an outing to London is always a fun and wonderful time, especially now he's found himself a brand new friend.]

Say, shall we get moving? It's true that the shops close at a certain time, right? [ Not the case in Hogsmeade. ]

I can't wait to get fitted for my new suit! Do you prefer matching socks or exciting socks in a different color?

Well, that would be just lovely. I'll let you know if I'll be in the area.

[The magic act is simply Aziraphale being fascinated by sleight-of-hand, but considering how bad he is at it, it probably does unintentionally throw off any suspicions from humans -- er, muggles.

He's pleased to hear that the other man is not one for war, even if his vanity shines through once again. But it's not a conversational topic that needs to continue, especially as Gilderoy is eager to get going. He nods and gets to his feet, smoothing out any wrinkles in his jacket and setting it to rights.]

Yes, they do, but we have a couple of hours yet before that. As for socks, I tend towards pastels, although I'm also very fond of tartan. [He taps his tartan bowtie as an example.] I had my own pattern commissioned.

midnight textings

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