toastysocks (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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bakerstreet2021-07-17 10:04 am
toastysocks) wrote in bakerstreet2021-07-17 10:04 am
Entry tags:
1: let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
2: You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
3: Damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
4: Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
5: The only thing that can make today tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
6: [bring your own text]
2: You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
3: Damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
4: Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
5: The only thing that can make today tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
6: [bring your own text]
Edited 2021-07-17 15:20 (UTC)
1. Did I kiss your nipple last night!?
2. I had to call off work because I can't clean or hide all these sharpie drawings/writings. Do you want to see what they did?
3. I cried into the nicest pair of tits I have seen in my entire life.
4. Mass Text Poll: hypothetically if a spirit steals your voice wtf do you even do about it?
5. WHY ARE TWINKS SO MEAN IS IT A CHIHUAHUA COMPLEX TYPE THING????
6. I promise to cook you meals for a week but you gotta do a big favor for me.
7. [Wildcard | Text her! Misfires welcome, open to continuing and new replies.]
2. I had to call off work because I can't clean or hide all these sharpie drawings/writings. Do you want to see what they did?
3. I cried into the nicest pair of tits I have seen in my entire life.
4. Mass Text Poll: hypothetically if a spirit steals your voice wtf do you even do about it?
5. WHY ARE TWINKS SO MEAN IS IT A CHIHUAHUA COMPLEX TYPE THING????
6. I promise to cook you meals for a week but you gotta do a big favor for me.
7. [Wildcard | Text her! Misfires welcome, open to continuing and new replies.]
Edited 2021-07-17 15:21 (UTC)
1: According to the doctor, I'm not supposed to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
2: Never in my life have I been as excited to nap as I am right now.
3: I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
4: THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
5: As a side note, I still have your handprint on my ass.
6: [bring your own text]
2: Never in my life have I been as excited to nap as I am right now.
3: I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
4: THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
5: As a side note, I still have your handprint on my ass.
6: [bring your own text]
1: Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
2: I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
3: It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest. Thanks for that, by the way.
4: I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
5: So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
6: [bring your own text]
2: I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
3: It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest. Thanks for that, by the way.
4: I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
5: So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
6: [bring your own text]
01. Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
02. I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my collar, go stones, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
03. I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night.
04. Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
05. text him!
previously...
you do seem rather frail, but i feel like you could punch me unconscious for three days if you wanted.
no way, no way... a life of crime isn't for me, unless you want to commit one together.
we can be models for hope!
1: Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
2: But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to medbay I probably should have
3: Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
4: be right there i have to get my cape
5: Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
6: [bring your own text]
2: But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to medbay I probably should have
3: Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
4: be right there i have to get my cape
5: Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
6: [bring your own text]
1: I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed and do not know if I can repeat.
2: Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of corellian rum and moving on.
3: You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you shower together the next morning
4: I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20 credits.
5: Run that by me again? You're 'so horny that you're legitimately concerned for my safety when you see me tonight'?
6: [bring your own text]
2: Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of corellian rum and moving on.
3: You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you shower together the next morning
4: I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20 credits.
5: Run that by me again? You're 'so horny that you're legitimately concerned for my safety when you see me tonight'?
6: [bring your own text]
1: Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
2: And here I am, playing fetch with a lothcat at two in the morning.
3: I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
4: Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
5: Between falling off a ledge onto a duracrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
6: [bring your own text]
2: And here I am, playing fetch with a lothcat at two in the morning.
3: I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
4: Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
5: Between falling off a ledge onto a duracrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
6: [bring your own text]
1. Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
2. You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
3. You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
4. text him!
2. You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
3. You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
4. text him!
Loki Laufeyson | Marvel Cinematic Universe / D+ / 616
lord_of_misrule
2021-07-17 04:31 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Don't feel obliged to vote for him because he's your drug dealer's dad, that sort of favor never ends amicably.
2. No. He's far more attractive in that Indiana Jones getup.
3. Yes, I call him daddy too.
4. Do you really think being incarcerated deters me?
5. [ byot ]
2. No. He's far more attractive in that Indiana Jones getup.
3. Yes, I call him daddy too.
4. Do you really think being incarcerated deters me?
5. [ byot ]
1) We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
2) Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
3) Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
4) [Text her. Misfires welcome.]
2) Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
3) Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
4) [Text her. Misfires welcome.]
[started here]
[Nothing else? Mikoto's lips tug downward in a light frown, concern clear on her face.]
You did seem a little tired.
[Ah, wait. Mikoto pulls a little red charm from her pocket.]
Here, take this, please. It's a protective amulet. I don't think what caused your memory loss was paranormal but it might help you in the future.
[The charm actually does feel soothing to the touch, just as comforting as Mikoto herself innately feels.]
[Nothing else? Mikoto's lips tug downward in a light frown, concern clear on her face.]
You did seem a little tired.
[Ah, wait. Mikoto pulls a little red charm from her pocket.]
Here, take this, please. It's a protective amulet. I don't think what caused your memory loss was paranormal but it might help you in the future.
[The charm actually does feel soothing to the touch, just as comforting as Mikoto herself innately feels.]
1. idk someone got shot at one point - but apart from that it was pretty drama free.
2. I always have fun facts; it's my party trick; being a fountain of useless yet interesting information.
3. You got stitches, yeah - but I had to wait in the ER with your barely-conscious body for three hours. If anything, you owe me.
4. Real bold of you to assume I give half a fuck.
5. Well I'm awake now, what do you want dude.
6. If it’s any consolation, I filmed basically the whole thing :D
7. ( Text her! )
2. I always have fun facts; it's my party trick; being a fountain of useless yet interesting information.
3. You got stitches, yeah - but I had to wait in the ER with your barely-conscious body for three hours. If anything, you owe me.
4. Real bold of you to assume I give half a fuck.
5. Well I'm awake now, what do you want dude.
6. If it’s any consolation, I filmed basically the whole thing :D
7. ( Text her! )
They were real busy though - I'm pretty sure I saw a dude get wheeled by with like, a whole pipe or something sticking out of him :O
And I was okay, I'm good at being unsupervised!
[ Is that supposed to be comforting? No one knows for sure. ]
And anyways, it's not like there's even anything to do in a hospital, other than keeping you awake cause you were WAY out of it, and cause if you fell asleep you woulda been in trouble.
Or more trouble, anyways...you're okay, right? I'm pretty sure you stopped bleeding so much eventually so I bet you didn't even lose that much really!
[ She's not going to mention that being around fresh blood that long made her super hungry, arguably the worst part of the night (other than Sen needing to be there in the first place.) ]
And I was okay, I'm good at being unsupervised!
[ Is that supposed to be comforting? No one knows for sure. ]
And anyways, it's not like there's even anything to do in a hospital, other than keeping you awake cause you were WAY out of it, and cause if you fell asleep you woulda been in trouble.
Or more trouble, anyways...you're okay, right? I'm pretty sure you stopped bleeding so much eventually so I bet you didn't even lose that much really!
[ She's not going to mention that being around fresh blood that long made her super hungry, arguably the worst part of the night (other than Sen needing to be there in the first place.) ]
[Totally up to date on all D+ shows and BW. Mark any spoilers for others.]
a. So we somehow ended up on Alpha Centauri. I have no idea how this happened.
b. He let me drive his motorcycle and I think I actually swooned.
c. He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl.
d. Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
e. Or text Carol!
a. So we somehow ended up on Alpha Centauri. I have no idea how this happened.
b. He let me drive his motorcycle and I think I actually swooned.
c. He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl.
d. Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
e. Or text Carol!
1. I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
2. You kept chewing the empty milk carton and saying “kitty” over and over again. It was an interesting night.
3. Hank is explaining the difference between “bestiality” and “Beastiality” and I’m so sorry I even made the joke.
4. Definitely laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
5. Text him!
2. You kept chewing the empty milk carton and saying “kitty” over and over again. It was an interesting night.
3. Hank is explaining the difference between “bestiality” and “Beastiality” and I’m so sorry I even made the joke.
4. Definitely laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
5. Text him!
I mean, I know one of those things is HELLA illegal, but I didn't expect it to turn into a full-on lecture. I kinda wish Dazzler was here, tbh. At least she went to law school and could maybe dazzle Hank into silence.
1. I have cats now. Five of them.
2. You fucked him, didn’t you?
3. Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
4. His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no.
5. I did not marry a roomba.
6. I need an aspirin and some dignity.
7. Misfire/Text him!
2. You fucked him, didn’t you?
3. Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
4. His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no.
5. I did not marry a roomba.
6. I need an aspirin and some dignity.
7. Misfire/Text him!
[Also available in her pre-Flashpoint Flamebird incarnation @feathersandflames]
1. Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure?
2. Let the record show that I hate your ass.
3. He woke up and said “Please don’t tell me your name, I don’t want to remember it.”
4. How are you always drunk?! And where are you trying to go?
5. Text her!
feathersandflames]1. Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure?
2. Let the record show that I hate your ass.
3. He woke up and said “Please don’t tell me your name, I don’t want to remember it.”
4. How are you always drunk?! And where are you trying to go?
5. Text her!
Edited 2021-07-17 17:45 (UTC)
Did a brief Wiki dive for this, hope I got it right!
the_awesome_one
- 2021-07-18 02:54 (UTC) - Expand1) He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
2) Let the record show that I hate your ass.
3) The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
4) It was good sex. He was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Gemini or God.
5) Text her!
Like, my ASS specifically, or all of me in general? Because either way, I get it. But like, why you so obsessed with me (girl I wanna know...)
1. Let the record show that I hate your ass.
2. Had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
3. You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters.
4. We're hate flirting.
5. Text him
2. Had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
3. You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters.
4. We're hate flirting.
5. Text him
01. You really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
02. I told my advisor I had to drop the class because the professor said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the first 10 minutes of the first lecture. She agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice.
03. Not to be dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
04. Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
05. Some nights you do cocaine until 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
06. [ Text him! ]
02. I told my advisor I had to drop the class because the professor said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the first 10 minutes of the first lecture. She agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice.
03. Not to be dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
04. Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
05. Some nights you do cocaine until 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
06. [ Text him! ]
[ Continued from here. ]
I sincerely feel for you, Hilda, but I'm sure wherever you are would be that much less exciting without you there. [ Incidentally: ] I thought Claude was in the business of inviting hot people to his parties. Does no one catch your eye?
I sincerely feel for you, Hilda, but I'm sure wherever you are would be that much less exciting without you there. [ Incidentally: ] I thought Claude was in the business of inviting hot people to his parties. Does no one catch your eye?
Clara Oswald | Doctor Who | OTA (no shipping w/ The Doctor, please)
makemeasong
2021-07-17 06:16 pm (UTC)(link)
1. What do you mean I'm 'aging funny?'
2. If you blew up another microwave, I'm going to choke you by the next tie you wear.
3. You should say it in the reverse. 'It's smaller on the outside.' He gets so angry.
4. Queen of England: Human or Alien?
5. About last night. I'm sorry. But I'll buy you more kiwis and pay for the dry cleaning.
6. [ text her instead! ]
2. If you blew up another microwave, I'm going to choke you by the next tie you wear.
3. You should say it in the reverse. 'It's smaller on the outside.' He gets so angry.
4. Queen of England: Human or Alien?
5. About last night. I'm sorry. But I'll buy you more kiwis and pay for the dry cleaning.
6. [ text her instead! ]
Edited 2021-07-17 18:16 (UTC)
So many good ones to choose! 2 (might add others later)
not_the_question
2021-07-17 06:22 pm (UTC)(link)
You might be waiting quite awhile.
LOL it actually works well, so I don't mind. 12 does, but he's 12, so....
not_the_question
- 2021-07-17 19:06 (UTC) - Expand1. Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
2. My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
3. DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
4. so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
5. Text him!
2. My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
3. DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
4. so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
5. Text him!
Absolutely not. I will not stand for that in this TARDIS. First of all, the blue raspberry's got the purple frosting with the blue stripe. What's the regular raspberry one got?
1. Let the record show that I hate your ass.
2. I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
3. she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
4. You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
5. or text him!
2. I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
3. she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
4. You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
5. or text him!
1. You're forcing me to be the voice of reason and it is not a good look on me.
2. Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
3. I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
4. I'm already in debt to one devil, I'm not agreeing to even give my name to another.
5. Text him!
2. Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
3. I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
4. I'm already in debt to one devil, I'm not agreeing to even give my name to another.
5. Text him!
Edited 2021-07-17 18:44 (UTC)
1. I ate cake in bed. Felt great
2. Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could ya even doubt that was one of them?
3. I mean ya guys are my friends and all but if ya fuck with me I won't hesitate to set ya on fire
4. Yeah, subtle ain't how I’d describe your flirtation strategy last night.
5. This may sound strange but do ya have my pants?
2. Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could ya even doubt that was one of them?
3. I mean ya guys are my friends and all but if ya fuck with me I won't hesitate to set ya on fire
4. Yeah, subtle ain't how I’d describe your flirtation strategy last night.
5. This may sound strange but do ya have my pants?
(cont from here)
oh no? who else would interfere?
yeah, if my side knew, that's probably what they'd think. but they wouldn't go after ya just for talkin to me. that's the difference.
and if i said i wanted to meet?
oh no? who else would interfere?
yeah, if my side knew, that's probably what they'd think. but they wouldn't go after ya just for talkin to me. that's the difference.
and if i said i wanted to meet?
feel free to take it! found it and made it for us / them~
blastedass
- 2021-07-18 04:18 (UTC) - Expand1. I'm fucked-out. That state of being between fucked up and passed out.
2. I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
3 I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise.
4. Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
2. I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
3 I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise.
4. Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
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