The Eggbaby Meme

[nomylunch]

 

"Each of your Eggbabies has a built in computer which registers the amount of care-- or lack of care-- it's given. These readings will determine your grade. As you can see the babies exhibit a wide range of emotions and expressions in need. It's your job to fill those needs."

How to: ✦ Leave a comment with your character's name and fandom. Others will reply ✦ Congratulations, the two of you are now in charge of an Eggbaby. You can pretend it's for class or, for those who aren't in school, you can assume the baby is some sort ofimportant mission. It is your job to take care of and keep the baby happy. If you drop the baby, you fail. You can not turn it off. Remember, this is a joint effort. This is a very important assignment that determines if you pass/fail the class or save the world. ✦ You can RNG a number between 1 and 8 to find out what kind of situation you're in. ✦ Good luck! Options: 1. Other plans. You had other plans but now you aren't sure if you can do them because of this baby. Try to convince your partner to do you a favor or else you'll have to drag the baby along with you. 2. Broke baby. Something is seriously wrong with this baby. It won't stop crying no matter what you do and you really wish this thing had an off switch. 3. Lost baby. What do you mean where's the baby? Don't you have it? Wait, you mean, you don't? FU-- WHERE'S THE BABY?! 4. Perfect baby. Your baby never cries. In fact, it doesn't really do much of anything. Wow, this project sure is easy! . . . Dude, it keeps staring at me. 5. Not my baby. This isn't your baby but you're watching it for a friend until they get back from that super important meeting. They've been gone all day and you hope they'll get back soon. 6. Twins. You're taking care of your baby and someone else's baby. (bonus option: you're taking care of another baby and another and another and another. . .) 7. MY BABYYYY! What the hell did you do? Your baby is broken. You've failedyour assignment. Maybe you can put it together and no one will ever notice or try to steal someone else's baby. 8. Crack baby. Roll again, combine prompts, or make up your own scenario. ( code。 )

Comments

Wonder Girl (Cassie Sandsmark) ✘ Young Justice: Invasion

[blundergirl]

(ooc: because this should be HILARIOUS.)

2 leave me to die.

[armedandunarmed]

[Okay, sure. Roy might be new to the team, but he still understood team building exercises. Kind of. Working together, helping each other out, blowing stuff up with your shiny new arm--no wait. That last one doesn't go here. ANYWAY, point is, they're meant to make the team stronger, so he was excited when he was tasked to work on a special mission with Cassie.

Although, when he found out that they were tasked to take care of a creepy eggbaby wearing a diaper, Roy was mad. Really mad. To add insult to injury, neither of them could opt out or they'd be benched for the next couple of missions. Aaaand the baby was already crying when they got it.

And has been crying ever since.

Seriously.

They got this egg like an hour ago. Why won't it shut up?]

Can't we just shut this stupid thing off?!

Piper Mclean ♥ Percy Jackson: Heroes of Olympus

[sweettalker]

[son_of_jupiter]

So, let me get this straight ...

[ Jason really didn't understand the point of this assignment. He never heard of training like this at Camp Jupiter. ]

Our assignment is just to watch it? Make sure it doesn't break? That's it?

Scar | Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 anime)

[envy_the_sinners]

[Here, a surprisingly fatherly serial killer]

Re: Scar | Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 anime)

[armoredsoul]

Well, this baby is...eerily quiet. "I have a feeling it should be crying more than it has been."

Winry Rockbell | Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 anime)

[wrench_wench]

[Still testdriving this gal!]

Re: Winry Rockbell | Fullmetal Alchemist (2003 anime)

[armoredsoul]

Al holds the little egg in both hands, blinking and staring at it. Thankfully, it is silent for now! "...so, how long are we taking care of this again?"

Brigid Finn | Teen Wolf OC | OTA

[bostonhowler]

[This is kinda perfect for a high school assignment.]

Isaac Lahey | Teen Wolf | OTA (M4M for shipping)

[blueeyedbeta]

An Isaac? Uh, yes! /adopts (5)

[reluctantrobin]

The problem with this project - and there were a lot of thing wrong with it - was that due to the high volume of werewolves in their class, and the frequency of mandatory training from Derek, meant that Stiles was left with almost all of them. Every day. After school. It was definitely not his idea of a fun time.

They were all in one pile in one corner of his desk, while he finished his other homework assignments, waiting for them to come and pick them up. He'd left the window open so they could climb right in, seeing as they all had an allergy to the front door.

{ james t. kirk :: star trek xi }

[kirkish]

[beforecommand]

[This isn't what she signed up for and it certainly wasn't in the recruitment handouts. See the galaxy, help keep peace, and... learn how to foster fake egg babies? One of these things wasn't like the others.]

[Jenn Shepard stared down at the carefully swaddled eggbaby in her arms, mouth set into a thin line. She could handle any weapon in the known galaxy with ease or could take a guy out with her bare hands if she really had to, but rocking a baby? She's not equipped for this sort of task. She's going to be a soldier, not a mom! Her hands aren't meant for caring for soft, breakable things and she's pretty sure this baby's days are numbered simply because it's been put in her care.]

I don't know if I can do this. You don't think this is going to affect our assignments, do you?

[This would be the worst way to ruin her career before it even started. Assigned to grunt duty because she killed an egg. Just peachy.]

{ tony stark :: mcu }

[weirdaboutstuff]

[this is probably a terrible idea all around.]

5

[hulkbusted]

[Bruce would never impugn Tony's abilities and methods with AIs. All he needs to do is have a chat with JARVIS to know that Tony is head and shoulders above all other innovators in the field.

What he doesn't understand is why, when JARVIS is a fully-developed intellect and personality, Tony would want to investigate developing AIs from a virtualized human infancy.

Or why he's currently the one tending this electronic egg that cries unless he rocks it to sleep, randomly wakes needing "feeding," and in particular...]

Tony, explain to me why you included a liquid output port that has to be regularly diapered?

{ dean winchester :: supernatural }

[huntersblood]

[human or shapeshifter babies are one thing...]

Rolled 2

[rogue_dhampir]

Is it dead?

Mulan | OUAT

[militantly]

Bruce Wayne | Nolanverse

[knighted]

8/5 - fun times?

[pryde_and_grit]

Seriously? Get stuck in another dimension for a while and get shoved into egg sitting duty? She had her own kids to worry about back home and no matter what some maniac said the egg baby was not going to explode if it wasn't cared for properly.

Still.

"Do not make me chase you across rooftops! I need a break from this thing!" It might be possessed. It had been laughing for three solid hours and it was time for the caped crusader to take a turn.

Merlin | Merlin BBC

[withholding]

Ruby | OUAT

[mantle]

2 for lolz. I'm fine with pre or post breaking the curse. c:

[ex_galvanist88]

[It won't stop crying. The damn thing wouldn't stop crying. He looked at the egg baby and gingerly picked it up. He was a doctor, not a pediatrician-how the hell did you take care of babies anyway?

You better stop him Ruby, Victor's this close to shaking the baby.]

Quinn | Glee

[lucycaboosey]

4

[whitechocolate]

[Everyone's jealous because their eggbaby never cries. They think their baby is perfect.

Sam thinks the baby is far from perfect. It won't laugh at his impressions!

He does one from the movie Scarface:] Say hello to my little friend!

[The eggbaby just blinks at him, unresponsive.] Seriously, what is wrong with you? My impressions are hilarious. Quinn, tell the eggbaby I'm hilarious.

Percival | Merlin BBC

[sleeveless]

uhhh 3 that is a good choice

[verybigpheasants]

[ look he is not a babysitter and it makes so much noise and who even knows what these things are doing in camelot

TEAMWORK EXERCISE OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT OBVIOUSLY and look nobody wants to lose out and have to wash all the boots or do Merlin's chores or god knows what sick sort of failure scenario Arthur would come up with. he's washed those boots before, no way in hell he's doing it again. who needs super intense backstories in meme land.

point is, clearly this is life or death and requires extreme urgency and Life or Death indications and running into the room like a pro. totally not panicking or anything. ]

Percival!

derek hale — TEEN WOLF

[dramaticsigh]

[ this is what he gets for hanging out with teenagers all day. ]

6. |:

[sirenshowl]

[yeah, he should have thought about that before he recruited teenagers into his pack. it's too late for regrets now, particularly since erica has ended up with not one of the damn eggbabies but two of them. she let stiles bribe her into taking care of his because left to his own devices he surely would have dropped it or tripped and thrown it into traffic or something.]

Beatrice | Umineko no Naku Koro Ni | Highschool AU

[redtext]

8

[incompetencies]

[Battler holds the egg baby in one hand, and a magic marker in the other. The marker is pressed towards the egg, making movements, squeaking as it flows on the egg's face.

He's not all that happy though, as his face is paved with annoyance. He would've loved to be paired up with any of the cute girls in his class! And it's not like the person he was paired with wasn't cute, it's just her name and what comes along with it. He's been forced to take care of this thing alongside the famous blonde hair, blue eyed senior, Beatrice.]

oswin oswald • doctor who

[impossibled]

[screw taking care of this thing, oswin's probably going to be trying to pry the back off to shut it off/see how it works.]

8 - dissecting babies is fun?

[highfunctioning_sociopath]

[Sherlock hated school. He hated it more when his school was forced to do things with the 'girls' school' across the way. And he positively despised it when they where given 'group projects' that had no correlation to real life at all.]

It's an electronic egg! How is this supposed to prepare us for the 'real world?' It would be better if they forced us to spend four weeks working in a nursery.

[Not that he'd like that any better, but at least that would be 'real']

Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler | X-Men: Evolution | OTA

[thefuzzyguy]

[Could lead to extra hilarity if it's before mutants get outed, or even after, since he's not exactly open about being fuzzy under the hologram.]

2

[escarabajoazul]

[Jaime appears to be trying to muffle the incessant wailing by smothering the egg in his shirt. It's not working.] So, uh.

I think it's broken. [sarcasm.]

Seiya Kou ✰ Sailor Moon Stars ✰ ota

[starlight_idol]

[rabbitheartedgirl]

Would you be interested in a thread?

Helga G. Pataki | Hey Arnold

[closet_poet]

2

[kickbutt_reality_master]

Why won't it move?

Agent Phillip Coulson | MCU | OTA

[lovably_awkward]

Photo Finish ✶ My Little Pony: FiM ✶ OTA

[photo_finish]

3

[kickbutt_reality_master]

Uh-oh.

(Young) Integra Hellsing | Hellsing | OTA

[therabbithearted]

[Rolled a 1. Hey, the kid has got to save England from vampires... or maybe she just wants to get out of her manor.]

couldn't resist

[immortalservant]

Integra had called on him and he answered, phasing into her room through the wall. "Yes my mast-" he paused as he saw the eggbaby on her desk.

"Integra, what exactly is this?" he asked, peering into the basket.

Eames | Inception | OTA

[a_little_bigger]

[contingencies]

[ Things could be worse. Arthur's oddly elliptical, quite impossible offspring could be

a. crying its batteries out
b. stuffed in Ariadne's locker (thus assuring them a failing grade)
c. rolling around on an architecture table, waiting to be pushed off and cracked (again, failing grade)
d. real

Option D is simultaneously the worst case and most unlikely scenario, circumstances considered. Its almost funny how he's had his and Ariadne's egg baby- a joint assignment meant to teach each and every one of them to keep their pants on or regret it forever- all day, and yet, he's seen about two seconds of Ariadne herself. Apparently Ariadne is the working half of their unlikely and possibly unholy union, which leaves Arthur to his physics homework.

Or it would, if he didn't have to keep one eye on Eames. ]

Don't. Touch. It.