bakerstreet | Only you can make that change.

[He was interested and excited. This was beyond thrilling, and such a unique opportunity that he couldn't possibly pass it up.]

Of course!

[Lin looked over at Ardyn, then over to the door. He bit his bottom lip, wondering if he could find something to record this information, or if Ardyn would change his mind if he left.]

Would you mind if I brought something back to record this? I could bring something for you as well.

[He wasn't sure how well Ardyn was being treated. Lin understood the need for restraints, but was he being taken care of adequately otherwise?]

I suppose I could allow that.

[...This was paying off sooner than he expected. True, he was treated well enough apart from the restraint--bleeding heart Noctis was, that was to be expected. Still, he couldn't very well turn down the offer.]

A bottle of wine might not hurt, if you can find one.

[Lin smiled in his excitement, and readily nodded at Ardyn's request.]

If there is one to be found, I will find it.

[When he is determined, rare as it is, nothing can stand in his way. Hopefully King Noctis' retainers won't learn what he's up to and decide to take him off the case.

...Not that this is meant to be a case. He's supposed to be making sure Ardyn is free of daemons, not recording his stories.

Lin leaves the room and walks past the guards stationed at the door with purpose, hoping they won't question him. It takes some time, but he's able to locate a functioning tape recorder. Even more searching turns up a bottle of wine.

This might be rare, so he had better keep it hidden in his long coat.

When he finally returns, locking the door behind himself, Lin looks quite pleased. He puts the tape recorder down on a table and then retrieves the bottle of wine from his coat.]

Never doubt a scholar on a mission.

My, aren't you a clever one.

[Very brave, or very foolish. Ardyn hadn't quite figured out which one for certain, but he was leaning heavily towards the latter. He smiled in much the way a daemon would have 'smiled' at wounded prey, trying to measure just what he thought of this situation. Surely Noctis would hate it if everyone he sent to Ardyn ended up learning the truth of how he'd come to be there. They might end up doubting the king himself, and what a crying shame that would be.]

There should be some glasses in that cabinet, if you'd like to get us a pair. Then perhaps you can tell me where you would like me to begin.

I do what I can.

[Growing up in the chaotic world of darkness, brave and foolish often melded together. It was difficult to rely on anyone but oneself, with friends and family constantly concerned about their own survival.

Lin had to rely more on his wits and magic to get by- difficult enough with his mind and body frequently demanding sleep, even if he was trying to travel or even in the middle of a conversation.

He hoped he wouldn't fall asleep while Ardyn was talking.]

That sounds good.

[He found the glasses easily enough and placed one in front of Ardyn and the other on the table with the tape recorder. He poured himself just a little, then a more generous amount for Ardyn. He left the bottle within the man's reach, just in case he wanted more.]

The beginning. Where else?

We may be here quite some time if that’s to be the case, but if you insist.

[He’d planned on starting there regardless—maybe part of him was almost eager for some reason. Was it the desire to turn Noctis’ soldiers against him, the usual need for attention, or something else?]

[Well, that didn’t matter right now. Pausing only to take a drink and think his words over briefly, Ardyn began to speak.]

The particulars of the Astral War and fall of Solheim, I know little more than any other; if ever I was aware of detail that history is not, I have long forgotten. But the fact is this; following the civilization’s collapse and humanity’s slow reemergence into function, it was House Caelum that was charged with guardianship of the divine Crystal. This you surely know, as do you know the generation which began the monarchy was that of His Majesty Somnus Lucis Caelum.

[Just saying it warranted another drink to conceal an expression of disgust.]

What you do not know that this generation was not one, but two. Somnus was the younger of a pair of brothers, and it was his elder which was blessed by the gods to carry out a calling most sacred. A healer, much like you. Before such powers dwelled mainly in the line of Fleuret- [the corner of his mouth twitched, as if consciously repressing another vicious snarl] -such responsibilities also laid with the noble house that had yet to be true royalty.

[After turning the recorder on, Lin listened intently to Ardyn's words, quickly drawn into the story. It was far too exciting to hear someone who lived two thousand years ago talk about such ancient history from personal experience.

Of course he was fascinated to hear about Somnus' older brother. Out of everything, he definitely did not expect that.

And a healer as well? The surprise must have been clear on Lin's face.]

So you are the founder king's older brother.

[It feels so strange to say that out loud.]

Please, continue.

I am indeed. Three years his elder, and a fair bit taller. [...Even after an eternity, some things were still a competition.] Ardyn Lucis Caelum, at your most humble service.

[He smiled in a way that didn't reach his eyes, which were locked directly on Linhardt. Evaluating his reactions, weighing exactly what words to use even if none of them were truly dishonest.]

Dear brother and I rarely saw eye to eye on how best to contend with the scourge. For though my power was granted by the very gods, it was limited by mortal hands. I was but one healer, and no matter how tirelessly I worked, the afflicted were beyond measure. How was it he phrased it...

'As you save one, how many others fall ill? When the land is full of daemons, will you continue to try to treat them one by one? Better to end them all now and stay ahead of the scourge, before it brings ruin to us all.'

[Ardyn spoke his brother's words with a mocking chill to them; disgusted less by the intent these days and more just the concept of Somnus in general. Which of them had been right or wrong no longer held meaning, especially with dawn returned to the star. It changed nothing, least of all how much Ardyn hated him.]

He preferred to see full settlements put to the flame, he and Gilgamesh alike. Better dead than a bloodthirsty monster, I'm sure he thought. Some of us would sooner have salvaged what we could, but gods forbid I try to do something kind.

[It really was no wonder that King Noctis wasn't prepared to kill Ardyn. They were family, then, if extremely distantly so.

Quite a few things seemed to make sense upon learning that information, even if Lin still only knew a small portion of the story.]

You tried to heal the scourge, and yet you were still cursed.

[Another person might not have made a connection right away, but since Lin's healing magic was not the 'pure' sort of the oracles, he wondered if Ardyn's magic was more like his own.

Did he take the pain or sickness into himself when he healed another person?

Lin wouldn't have even thought to do something like that with the scourge. He wouldn't have thought it was possible.]

Did you realize what that would...

[No. His own voice didn't belong on the recorder, and he had a limited amount of tape. So he pressed pause.]

Did you know what would happen if you cured those people?

Oh, you are a bright one, aren't you? I'm quite impressed, actually.

[That sounded surprisingly genuine. No one else had ever questioned the potential consequences of what Ardyn was doing back then, and yet it sounded as though Linhardt had puzzled it out after the fact with no issue. Sure, he knew there was or had been some deep corrupting force within Ardyn, but given that he was sure most were too damn stupid to guess without being told, seeing the alternative still managed to catch him off guard.]

[Maybe...no. Surely the gods wouldn't curse someone else with such a blessing when the Oracle line was right there with a similar and yet improved power. No point to it but cruelty, even if Bahamut was not above cruelty in general.]

At first? Not at all--one tends to be quite stupid when they think they're charged with a higher calling. But it was hard not to figure it out after a while--it wasn't as if I were immune entirely. Once the symptoms began manifesting, I took great pains to conceal it at all costs while I continued my work.

Even then, of course I couldn't imagine I would turn into some fabled monster. I rather assumed I would merely die in a handful of years and aimed to bring the scourge to an end before then.

It's not that.

[Lin didn't know much about the gods. He heard stories, of course, but they weren't an important part of his life. There is so much that passed him by thanks to the ten years of dark, where only survival mattered.

At least he had most of his childhood to look back on. Even if his relationship with his parents was never very good.

He frowned while listening to Ardyn continue. He understood parts, but plenty of other details weren't fitting together. Instead of explaining their similarities and asking more questions, he chose to reach out and press 'play' on the recorder again.]

So you used your healing abilities to cure scourge victims. What happened after the symptoms manifested?

Well, as things carried on, Somnus and I finally went our separate ways. He remained in the castle--no doubt where the Citadel stands now--and I left the city to focus wholly on my efforts.

Time passed in such a way with my own condition worsening while I evaded the capital's soldiers, and the occasional settlements here and there bursting into flame before I could get to them. Rather a higher-stakes game of chess than those we once played, but no less competitive for it.

[Then, Ardyn lapsed into a brief silence. Either the wineglass in his hand had suddenly become inexplicably fascinating, or he'd brushed up against a point he didn't think he'd get far enough to reach. He had been reasonably sure he would have been cursed out as a liar (sometimes true) and traitorous to the crown (always true) before the story reached its critical grisly climax. And yet here he was, briefly hesitating over it was even worth speaking into vivid reality. Perhaps that would be the breaking point that strayed into disbelief--but even if it was, would admitting to it be worth the trouble?]

One day, a small infantry group caught up to me. All at once did they kneel in deference, and the commander spoke to me:

'Last night, the word of the gods was heard. Ardyn Lucis Caelum, you are to be our king.'

...In hindsight, it occurs to me now that he wore my brother's colors. Would that I had been quite so observant to consider that fact rather than allow myself to be summoned back to the castle.

[Lin had no reason to disbelieve Ardyn's story. He already knew some of it was true simply from the few corroborating details from King Noctis. The parts about taking in the scourge just made sense when he thought of his own magic.

As for the rest? Well, Ardyn was never mentioned in the histories and myths. It was always Somnus and Somnus alone.]

So your brother sent his loyal men to bring you back to the castle.

[That held no positive implications. Of course, Lin already knew this story didn't have a happy ending for Ardyn.]

What happened when you arrived?

[Lin just wanted to hear the story. He wasn't interested in jumping to judgments, nor was he at all involved in the events that took place between the fall of Insomnia and the end of the long night.]

...

[There was something very fixed and very cold about the way Ardyn smiled in response to that question.]

When I arrived to my coronation- [The word alone sounded like a massive Midgardsormr rearing back and spitting poison] -with subjects and Crystal alike observing, I was rather rudely interrupted. For one stood from where he knelt in deference, and thus did I hear that miserable wretch speak.

'It was me, brother. I was chosen by the gods.' He announced it to all bearing witness. 'Forgive me for deceiving you, but it was necessary to lure the seditious traitor here today.'

[Ardyn's hand shifted slightly on the glass, a conscious movement to stop himself shattering it in his grip. Gold eyes were bright as they focused fully on Linhardt perhaps without really seeing him, flame of something dark and terrible burning behind them. Though his tone was conversational and light, it was forcibly so; as if thinking any deeper on what he was actually saying would cause him to explode into rage on the spot.]

'Did you covet my throne that badly?' Good heavens, I can still hear him as clearly as if he were as close as you are. 'The gods have spoken, and I, Somnus Lucis Caelum, am king.'

I asked him, then, what happened if I should object. Of course I could not allow him to take the throne--our people feared him, and fervently wished I should be their ruler. But when I asked, he chose to come at me with that beloved blade of his. Sword of the Mystic', they call it now? We fought, of course, but between my condition and my foolish unwillingness to take his arrogant head off of his shoulders, I was outclassed.

[Another pause, and now the uncertainty flickered across his face for a brief, visible instant. There was something he didn't want to admit to, even though it made Somnus look like the monster Ardyn believed him to be.]

...There was...only one who came to my defense. Only the first Oracle. And when she stood between us to protect me from that blade, he cut her down and mocked her sacrifice as foolish.

[It was harder to keep the mask of indifference in place when it was cracking, and that uncertainty turned back into the barely-restrained fury he'd held when Linhardt first spoke to him. Halfway to snarling, Ardyn snapped:]

Your precious Founder only knew one way to deal with his problems. Crush them underfoot, burn them out from his precious ideal kingdom, and bury them so deep that no one would dare raise their voice to question him lest they be next. Callous murder was the only thing that lying wretch was ever good at, and if someone like that should take everything I ever valued and claim it his own, then I'm glad I destroyed it all.

[Again, Linhardt found himself lost in Ardyn's story. To think, this was what truly happened, straight from the mouth of someone who lived it! Such a horror story, and yet, wasn't that consistent in legends and myths? Tragedy, betrayal, death. He shouldn't be surprised to hear any of this.

And yet, the way Ardyn spoke, the pain and anger in his voice, tore Linhardt from his wonder at hearing about an ancient history as the realization that he was hearing about this man's life startled him like a punch to the gut.

This wasn't a fascinating book or myth about a hero. This was a very personal tale of grief and agony, one that might have been two thousand years old but clearly still stuck in Ardyn's mind and heart as stubbornly as any daemon could.

Lin stopped the tape.]

He means nothing to me, just like this place isn't his anymore. It's over. It's done, and none of us can go back.

[Maybe that was why King Noctis was so willing to forgive. He must have known more of the truth, and was wise and empathetic enough to realize that killing Ardyn wouldn't help anything. Not if he was still here, with the ancient daemons no longer a rot in his mind.]

You can breathe, now.

[Everyone was going to move on. Was it possible for Ardyn to do so as well? To let go of the pain that followed him for so long?

He reached out a hand, though he hesitated before touching Ardyn's hand. Too presumptuous. Lin was never good with people, as those around him were fond of frequently reminding him.]

Edited 2021-04-17 03:14 (UTC)

[Ardyn pulled his hand away as sharply as if he'd been burned, as defensive as a feral cat and seething in his own fury. He didn't lash out like a daemon would have--at least, not with anything but his voice.]

How bold of you, to assume I like the fact that I'm still breathing. Do you think that His Majesty sparing me is some act of mercy? Because I can't help but see it as anything but further torment. I was told he was going to put an end to this, and yet here I remain. How many times must I be killed by some self-righteous ruler before it's over? Perhaps he too will think it easier to simply lock me in Angelgard for another two thousand years?

['Letting go' was, apparently, a little beyond him.]

If he'd like to try, he'll have to kill me again, because I will not make the same mistake that I did with my brother. No more posturing, no confrontation, I'll just kill him on the spot and burn House Caelum to the ground.

What?

[He uttered that single word so softly that it might as well have been caught in a breath.

Linhardt tugged his hand away as well, startled by Ardyn's reaction, and instead grasped his hands together in his lap.

His mind was reeling with revelations and each new bit of horrifying information. To hear that Ardyn had been imprisoned on a deserted island for those two thousand years was probably the most shocking part of all for how terrible it was to image.

Such a huge amount of time. Even for someone like Linhardt who valued his time alone, he couldn't even begin to fathom what that might have felt like. Who needed daemons to drive one to destruction when they had that?]

I should have realized.

[He whispered to himself, unsure why the thought hadn't occurred to him at all. Why would Ardyn wait so long for revenge if he had been free for so long? He had been imprisoned instead, and all of those horrible emotions had nothing to do but grow and grow until they were suddenly released back into the world.]

He won't. He wouldn't.

[At least he was convinced of that much. Noctis wanted to make sure Ardyn was no longer the threat he once was. Surely he wouldn't care if he planned to simply lock him up again.]

But I think I understand why you feel that way, now.

[Why he might be eager to die. There were stories that taught the lesson that immortality was more of a curse than a blessing. They were cautionary tales that Linhardt never really thought had a basis in reality. The sort of stories that taught you to 'be careful what you wished for.'

Well, Ardyn obviously never wished for his curse. No wonder he felt so much hatred toward Lucis and the gods.

But he was mortal now, wasn't he? Even if King Noctis wanted to imprison him for another two thousand years, he wouldn't be able to.]

I don't know if I can help change your mind. I'm nothing special.

[He wasn't a particularly happy person. His abilities made him little more than a tool that people dragged along on their missions with healing items in short supply. He never had a say, because when he objected earlier on, the people he did care about would explain why he needed to use his 'gift' to help the others around the area survive.

Eventually he stopped commenting on the pain he suffered with the use of his magic. Sleeping and naps were the best escape from the world, and he began embracing whatever it was that caused him to slip into dreams without warning. Even now, just trying to understand what Ardyn went through was making him feel exhausted in a way that suggested he was likely to fall asleep at any moment.]

All I can do is listen to you. And... [A few seconds passed where it looked like Linhardt might have drifted off. But then he blinked a few times, furrowed his brow, and continued speaking.]

...Would you allow me to come back tomorrow? We can talk more, and I can bring you something else you want.

Most people didn't.

[Apart from that coldly sarcastic observation regarding his abandonment, Ardyn was silent as Linhardt contended with the former chancellor's outburst--attempting to calm down and resisting the urge to just shatter the now empty glass in his hand regardless. What was he doing? What was the point of any of this? All it had served to do was irritate Ardyn himself beyond measure and make this little pawn of a stolen crown look at him like he was some miserable, pitiable thing.]

[...Objectively, maybe that was true, but he still had some semblance of pride left.]

I can't very well stop you, can I?

[Part of him did admittedly want to hear more, to understand what form of twisted healing curse Linhardt himself had been burdened with. But today, he was just a little too lost in his own bitterness to think on the matter any further than that.]

[Linhardt picked up the tape recorder and rose to his feet. If he remained seated any longer he would surely fall asleep, and he didn't want that. He would prefer to escape to the privacy of his guestroom, burrow under the covers, and sleep the evening and night away.

Maybe that would be enough time for him to adequately consider the information he learned from Ardyn. The more exhausted he felt, the less he was able to handle overwhelming thought, and overwhelming thought exhausted him.

It often felt like he was cursed with two problems.]

No. You can't.

[There was no reason to sugarcoat Ardyn's situation. That would just waste both of their time.]

So tell me what you want. Otherwise I'll just bring you something I like.

[It took Linhardt a moment to realize he'd taken to staring at Ardyn. It was difficult to imagine him as the monster everyone claimed he had been. He had strong, handsome features, and surprisingly soft looking lips. That unruly hair suited his face quite well.

It wasn't too hard to imagine the king he could have been.]

[Whether or not he was in better control of his emotions internally, the slow and arrogant smile began to cross Ardyn's face again; mask firmly back in place, at least for now. He slouched somewhat in his chair, one leg crossed over the other and head leaning on a hand. He lacked the serious dignity of Noctis on the Lucian throne, but even in his cavalier disregard for...well, everything...he carried some distinct authority somewhere in his demeanor.]

If you'll insist upon monopolizing my time? Surprise me, then.

Only you can make that change.

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