bakerstreet | in other words

[ info in journal, heed the warning. m/m for shipping, but please discuss with me first. ]

gibel (russian, n.) 1) not death, not suicide, but simply ceasing to exist; deteriorating in a way that is painful for others. 2) death, destruction, ruin.
brontide (english, n.) the low rumble of distant thunder.
réchauffé (french, n.) warmed leftovers.
tausendsassa (german, n.) jack-of-all-trades; a multi-talented person.
uitwaaien (dutch, v.) to take a break to clear one's head; lit. "to walk in the wind".

Or bring your own!

or bring your own, i'm not your dad.

or bring your own!

[ ooc; biography & permissions. eleanor comes from a world plagued by the old gods, she and her friends are trying to find ways to send them back and fight them off. ]

1) anfractuosity (n.) something twisting and turning; something mazelike and confusing
2) filipendulous (adj.) hanging by a thread
3) orenda (n.) a mystical force present in all people that empowers them to affect the world, or to effect change in their own lives
4) choose your own!

abditory: a place into which you can disappear; a hiding place.
anfractuosity: something twisting and turning; something mazelike and confusing.
culaccino: the ring left on a table by a cold glass.
alexithymia: the inability to express your feelings.
naufragous: 1. causing shipwreck; 2. in danger of being wrecked or totally destroyed.
callipygian (m/f): having shapely buttocks.
(or, drop me a word for a starter!)

[ accismus / l'appel du vide / fernweh ]

1. hiraeth: longing or nostalgia, an earnest longing or desire, or a sense of regret; the feeling of longing for a home that no longer exists or never was. a deep and irrational bond felt with a time, era, place or person.

2. sirimiri: a light rain; a fine drizzle.

3. tacenda: things better left unsaid; matters to be passed over in silence.

4. nyctophilia: love of darkness or night; finding relaxation or comfort in darkness

5. bring your own!

(( I wrote this with OU Margaery in mind but left it vague, so if you think any particular AU you like would fit better with a random visit from a demonic fear god, do as thou wilt. ))

Asura was afraid of everything. His paranoid way of life was often paradoxical. So while he did fear the dark, it wasn't the instinctive way humans did. He was much so much more afraid of the light. After all, he could see in the dark, but in the light other people could see him too. So when he went on his jaunts, it was when it was dark. His fear of the dark was that it was too pleasant, too tempting, too soothing, it made him wonder if it was too good to be true... so he indulged in the darkness only when he still had a thread of light to pull on.

This meant, on one specific night of no other importance, Asura delicately dropped from the sky onto the balcony of none other than Margaery Tyrell. There was a good view as he stood on the balustrade above an enormous drop. A view of a dark world to the edge of the horizon, only tiny specks of light below and above. No moon in the sky, no enormous flames below. But the light behind him, signifying the occupant was still awake, had slipped his notice for now, as he remained perched there looking out.

A) uitwaaien

B) apricate

C) objet trouvé

D) dépaysement

E) 緣分 (yuanfen)

F) Bring your own!

SCURRILOUS (adj.) - using or characterized by coarse, vulgar language
ALEXITHYMIA (n.) - the inability to express your feelings
ORPHIC (adj.) - mysterious and entrancing; beyond ordinary and understanding
ULTRONEOUS (adj.) voluntary; spontaneous

1. Viridity (n.) - naive innocence
2. Anfractuosity (n.) - something twisting and turning; something maze-like and confusing
3. Meliorism (n.) - the belief that the world can be made better by human effort.
4. Legerity (n.) - physical or mental quickness; nimbleness; agility.
5. Lucent (adj.) - softly bright or radiant

(( Shipping info here; otherwise OTA! ))

[ Thinks with Satoko had been... awkward. Even with all of her knowledge and insight gained through the tragic ends in so many worlds, there were times that Rika felt like she was completely out of her depth even in regards to her friends. So here she was, sitting across from Rena in some small cafe near campus. It hadn't been easy to get away from the life at Saint Lucia's--a life she enjoyed, even for the struggles with her studies and the pressures of a new social life. The sticking point was Satoko.

Of course it was Satoko. Her dearest friend, someone that she cared for more than she could express--someone who had agreed to support her dream for them. Yet... they seemed to be drifting further and further apart and Rika couldn't find a solution in her own mind. All the more reason to consult others. Her fingers close on the handle of her cup of tea and she lifts it to her lips. ]

Thank you again for agreeing to come see me. I know you must be busy with your university work.

[ Rena has a big smile on her face as she sits across from Rika. She seriously can't get over how grown up her little friend looks now especially sipping on that tea. She desperately wants to take her home...!

But no, she can't. Rika asked to meet up for a reason, so Rena keeps herself in check. ]

It's never any trouble, Rika-chan! Plus I'm sure you've been busy with your studies too!

[ She takes a sip of her own drink before setting it back down. ]

So what did you want to talk about? I'm all ears!

[ Rika sets the tea back on the table and folds her hands into her lap. She's still the smallest of all her friends in spite of her hopes of growing taller and more adult seeming. She frowns and furrows her brow. ]

I'm worried about Satoko.

Satoko-chan?

[ Rena's eyebrows raise in surprise. She hadn't heard anything about something being wrong with Satoko up until now, and it puts a pit in her stomach.

She sits up a little straighter and meets Rika's eyes with her own. ]

What's going on?

I'm not sure how to put it.

[ Rika frowns. ]

Saint Lucia's is a very demanding school for everyone and I... I don't have the time to give her the way I used to. I'm worried maybe she's... she's not fitting in well? Or struggling with her academics? But I can't be sure.

[ Rena frowns when she hears that. She hates knowing something's wrong with her friends. And not having a clue about Satoko is alarming. ]

Have you tried talking to her about it, Rika-chan? Even if you're both busy, don't you think it's important to set some time aside for her?

I...

[ Rika frowns and looks down at her drink. It's not pleasant to admit this, but she must. ]

I can't say that I have. Maybe I should. I just don't know when I shall find the time.

[ She's doing it again. Hanyuu had accused her of treating her friend like a stray cat--she just expected that Satoko would always be there. How had this happened? ]

[ Feel free to prompt me! Not really interested in shipping. ]

1. scripturient - (adj) having a consuming passion to write

2. zenzizenzizenzic - (adj) to the power of eight; representing "the square of squares squarely"

3. baisemain - (n) kiss on the hand

4. lalochezia - (n) the emotional relief gainedfrom using abusive or profane language.

5. Choose you own word

i. antephialtic
ii. yuanfen
iii. culaccino
iv. scurrilous
v. choose your own or provide one

1. scripturient
2. myötähäpeä
3. vagary
4. honne
5. eremophobia
6. súton
7. Or choose your own.

filipendulous: hanging by a thread

anfractuosity: something mazelike and confusing; something twisting and turning

lacuna: a blank space; a missing part

apotheosis: perfect example; elevation to divine status

Or...?

inselberg: an isolated mountain

schadenfreude: delight obtained from the troubles of others

bricolage: something created from a variety of available things

holophrasis: the expression of complex ideas in a single word or phrase

or pick your own!

abyssopelagic | tarantism | dwale | desenrascanco | or your own!

[ I'm still not current on Gou, so no Gou spoilers please. Otherwise hit me with your best shot! ]

pettifoggery (n.) A trivial quarrel
witzelsucht (n.) a feeble attempt at humor; excessive facetiousness; a condition where the patient compulsively tells puns
acatalepsy (n.) the impossibility of comprehending the universe; the belief that human knowledge can never be truly certain
mono no aware 物の哀れ (n.) (phr.) lit. "the pathos of things"; the gentle wistfulness at the transience of things, and the awareness of the sadness of existence
tatemae 建前 (n.) what a person pretends to believe; the behavior and opinions one must display to satisfy society's demands.

Or bring your own!

Edited 2021-03-09 16:08 (UTC)

(OOC. Going for a mixture of acatalepsy and mono no aware here - although I'm fine with mixing in some of the other words listed as well! Let me know if I should change anything, though.)

[Waking up in a space between worlds was... definitely not normal.

But she recognized this place.

More than almost anyone, she knew where she was. The space between worlds; between Fragments. And instinctively, she opens her mouth to call out a familiar name, but it soon dies in the back of her throat.

Why?

Because - what she winds up seeing is a familiar face. One that she thought that she could only see in the mirror.

Who— No, these are words meant to be said aloud.]

... who are you?

[After all, in a space like this, it's hard to tell.

There are too many possibilities, after all.]

[ Rika's eyes shot open in almost the same instance. Had she died again? Been returned once more to that awful, never-ending cycle of death and despair in the June of 1983?

No. This is the real of fragments. So many possibilities (so much pain, so much suffering) spinning in the void. As she locks eyes with herself, she starts just a little. ]

Furude Rika. Who are you?

[ A pause, silence lingers. ]

I've only ever seen one other person here.

[She opens her mouth, almost as if to say 'Furude Rika', but then stops herself right then and there. It's probably an awkward sight, to see someone that looks like you try to say a name but fall short, silence hanging in the air like a marionette.]

...

[Let's try this again.]

... Bernkastel.

[If the person in front of her is 'Furude Rika', then she has to take that name, doesn't she?

Alone, she would probably be laughing bitterly. Here, she just hangs her head, her bangs hiding the mixed feelings that swirl in the pit of her stomach.]

Frederica Bernkastel.

[An amalgamation of her first and last name. The name of her father's favorite wine, which she found herself drinking every now and again, back in that frustrating, near hopeless, endless June.]

Not many people come here, after all...

[Not to this place between Fragments.]

Edited (wow, i sure futzed up my html) 2021-03-10 05:43 (UTC)

Bernkastel.

[ Well, that sounds familiar. Was this her? Another her? A younger her, perhaps? She half-turns her head to look out over the glittering sea of Fragments. Each one full of pain and tragedy. ]

Only those of us who live in loops. That's what Hanyuu said.

... Yes.

[Her response is calm as her gaze follows the other Rika's -

Towards the sea of Fragments before them, the worlds where 'Furude Rika' had died in.]

I - [Her voice catches in her throat a little bit, hesitant. How honest should she be? Well, if this is 'her', then...] If she said that, then... it still...

[Somehow, it isn't over.

Her hundred year journey still, somehow, for some reason that she can't explain, much less fathom, isn't over.]

I'm not supposed to live in loops anymore! It should have ended, right? So being here now - it's just some dream, isn't it?!

Edited 2021-03-11 07:43 (UTC)

[ Rika blinks and stares down at her younger self ("younger" when age didn't really matter in this place). This meeting shouldn't be possible. But with the looping of time, who could say what would happen? The question that Bernkastel asks drives a knife into Rika's heart. It would be cruel not to speak the truth and yet telling her seems so pointless. It's grotesque. Hideous. ]

It started again five years later. I don't know how or why yet but I'm getting closer.

[ As if she hadn't decided to give herself five more worlds and then fallen apart with renewed horror and stress of it all. ]

Edited 2021-03-11 07:57 (UTC)

[It's only then and there when she hears the words proper that her expression completely falters.

If she were truly a witch like the name that she carried was, those words alone would be a stake wedged right in the ribs. Painful, but not enough to end her life.

Perhaps it would be cruel not to have spoken the truth.

But perhaps... saying nothing would have been better, too. Not that 'Bernkastel' knows, really as she just laughs. And laughs and laughs and laughs and laughs-]

Five years...? Are you saying I only have five years of freedom until I'm trapped in a birdcage once again? Ha... hahaha... this must be some awful joke.

[She almost wants to cry.

And yet - the tears don't seem to come. Not so easily.]

Do you think that maybe if I pinched myself, I'd wake up...? That the idea of something like that starting again, happening again after just five simple years... is just some horrible, awful dream......?

[ Rika stares at the other 'her.' The one who doesn't yet know the suffering and tragedy that lays ahead. The awful pain of it all. The helplessness of having broken through fate once and seeing it turn to ashes only a few short years later, to have every move you make blocked as if the dice had been seized by other hands. ]

I wish it was a dream.

[ She can feel tears prickling in her eyes and there's a perverse desire to seize the other her and to hug her. If only because for once there is someone who understands. Someone who knows what it is to be a bird in a cage. She takes a step forward and drops down to her knees to enfold the younger self in her arms. ]

I'm sorry.

[ She must sound like Hanyuu. Apologizing for something she cannot change. ]

That's not what I wanted to hear...

[Her own voice deflates a little bit along with her torn expression. Even if she might not know the specifics of what's to come, that doesn't mean that she isn't aware of the implications.]

I didn't want to hear you apologizing to me—

[—to say "I'm sorry" for something that isn't even your fault.

It's only when she feels the arms around her, an actual warm body around her that her eyes finally trickle with proper tears streaming down the sides of her cheeks.]

I know.

[ Rika knows. She knows it deeply, somewhere in her bones that this is not what she would have wanted to hear when she was younger. Yet to say otherwise would be a deeper cut. She hugs herself tighter, the way she so desperately wished to be embraced when she was so much younger than she is now. She hugs tight, lets the memory of her mother's touch and the comfort that she wished could be real encourage her. ]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[ Rika repeats the words over and over and over. As helpless as Hanyuu and impotent to do anything to help. She is crying, her tears damp against her own hair. ]

I'm sorry.

["I know."

Those words are a far cry from any sort of comfort. Instead, they just make the tears stream even more, her voice shaking with every syllable.]

... why? Wasn't it... enough...? Wasn't a hundred years enough? There -

[Each word that tries to come out is a struggle. She almost feels like she's breathing underwater, and it's difficult to reach the surface.]

There has to be a way... A way to prevent this...

I don't know. All I know is that in my world--the one I experienced, I didn't anticipate whatever caused it. I was too lax.

[ She closes her eyes. Hates the admission of weakness. Of having failed to be watchful enough. ]

I don't even remember what killed me.

[Going from "I know" to "I don't know" honestly kind of stings.

Does that mean she has to spend the next five years in fear, preparing to counter a potential death? She isn't allowed to relax at all? It's unfair. Too unfair. Her own eyes shut, as if that would help her tears dry.

They don't.

No matter how hard she tries.]

The cycle of death again... I don't want to experience that ever again...

ALEXITHYMIA (n.) | the inability to express your feelings
MELIORISM (n.) | the belief that the world can be made better by human effort.
LEGERITY (n.) | physical or mental quickness; nimbleness; agility.
LALOCHEZIA (n.) | the emotional relief gainedfrom using abusive or profane language.
PETTIFOGGERY (n.) | A trivial quarrel.

1. guanxi - a network of social connections based on mutual trust and the balancing of debts by returning favours so that the relationship's benefits are shared by all

2. sillage - the scent that lingers in the air, the trail left in water, the impression made in space after something or someone has been and gone; the trace of someone's perfume

3. [your prompt]

in other words

marcel verlinden ( original ) ota

york ( rvb )

north dakota ( rvb )

sam winchester ( spn )

eleanor adams ✧ original character ✧ ota

gojo satoru | jujutsu kaisen | ota

dracula.

jill valentine | resident evil | ota

black jack randall, outlander.

margaery tyrell | game of thrones

4!

Wei Wuxian • The Untamed • OTA

faye valentine | 𝒄𝒐𝒘𝒃𝒐𝒚 𝒃𝒆𝒃𝒐𝒑

Rena Ryugu | Higurashi Gou

Viridity + Anfractuosity, kinda?

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denys ( oc )

Caleb Widogast | Critical Role | OTA

pyeon sang-wook • sweet home

Number Five | The Umbrella Academy | OTA

Castiel | Supernatural

The Master | Doctor Who

Ganymede | Greek mythology

Rika Furude » Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni

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Doctor Stephen Strange | MCU | m/m

Natalia Romanova | au | info in journal