It's A Small World After All?

[werewolftigerman]

The Indian in the Cupboard Jam-Jar



One minute you’re fighting the Imperial Army on the forest moon of Endor, and then blink and you find yourself standing in a strange wooden box. Only it’s not just a wooden box, it’s a cupboard, and a magic one at that. You can choose to stand there and try and figure out the magic behind the process, but someone is opening the cupboard so, you might need to worry about them instead.

Or, perhaps you’ve been out of the cupboard for a while and are having to welcome some newcomers, for... whatever reason it is that the person who owns the cupboard decided they needed the new person.

Or (again), perhaps you came into possession of this box and are about to find out that inanimate objects come to flesh-and-bone living-and-breathing life. Maybe you already knew, and this isn’t your first time using the cupboard. Watch out for weapons – they can still hurt!

Comments

Peter Parker | MCU | OTA

[spider_m4n]

[mrpool2u]

There was literally, literally, everything in the knife drawer, except knives. All the knives were in various bad and not so guys' faces around the city. Which was fine, because Wade could slice watermelon with his katana.

What he did need, though, was a melon baller. There was a good chance he last used it in the bathroom, but if that was the case he wasn't going to get the short and curlies out of the lever mechanism, so this was more a hopeful search in case Al owned one as well...

Pulling the drawer out with a jerk, all the contents clattered and slid forward. Chopsticks, novelty spoons in the shape of dicks, curly straws in the shape of dicks, handcuffs, a back massager in the shape of a dick, a My Little Pony friendship bracelet, and a Spider-Man doll.

"Did Al get me a present? She shouldn't have!" Grinning, Wade reached into the drawer to pick the figure up.

[spider_m4n]

But Wade's doll was no regular doll. It had been once, bought at a garage sale and with a little paint missing on his left foot thanks to a boy who had clearly loved the toy once.

Now though, the doll was made of flesh and bone and real tiny hands that held onto Wade's massive finger as he was picked up.

"Hey! What's - What's going on?!" Peter turned his head to both his, twisting his tiny body to see if the rest of the Avengers were around, like they were supposed to be moments ago. "Mr. Stark?!"

[mrpool2u]

For a moment, Wade's smile got bigger: The detail was amazing and it had actions! And it talked! He could play with this all night.

"OhEMGee! Aren't you cute!" He turned Spider-Man over in his hands and tried to pull up the back of the suit where he assumed it would be a two piece top and trousers. "Are you battery powered?"

So his thumb pressed against the figures ass as he held it, who was going to pull him up for fondling a well molded butt? Except that butt wasn't hard, cold plastic, it was soft under his touch.

Wade's breath caught in a gasp. "Are you... Oh, she didn't! That dirty blind listening-Tom. She got me a sex doll!"

[spider_m4n]

The pressure against his ass was so weird. Like trying to sit against a wall and pushing back with all you've got. Why was this giant...

Wait, SEX DOLL?

"What--? What are you doing?! Did some alien send you? Are you from Asgard?!" Maybe that was Thor's magic bridge? It was too dark, unlike the rainbow stuff Mr. Stark had told him about. "Where's the Avengers?!" Peter demanded to know, squirming in Wade's hold.

[mrpool2u]

Asgard? Was that something Spider-Man said? He hadn't seen him say it on any of the youTube videos he watched. Maybe this was a knock off? Oh! Of course it was! They don't have officially licensed Spider-Man sex toys, he's too pure, like a unicorn.

Not Mr Clops. Mr Clops is filthy.

Still, this was too lifelike for a Chinese reproduction. Wade turned the figure back around in his hand and held it up to his face. "The Avengers are probably back in their tower drinking Cosmopolitans."

Seemed likely and that was the only cocktail he knew that didn't have a dirty name.

[spider_m4n]

Turned now, he was finally facing the giant. A giant in a suit. A super suit. A secret identity, at least!

Doubling over, Peter used all his strenght to try and pry those fingers open and away from him, but fighting a giant took more than the strenght of someone who can barely take off his back a ceiling that just dropped from above.

Man, that had not even nearly as terrifying as this...

"Who are you? What'd you want?"

He does know the Avengers at least.

"Who sent you?!"

[mrpool2u]

He could feel the way the little figure tried to squirm and push against his fingers, but he had a firm hold. He was starting to think that this wasn't a toy after all. Or at least not the kind of toy he was used to.

"I'm Wade Winston Wilson," he squinted at the little Spider-man. "Maybe you've heard of me? Deadpool?"

He glanced at his knife drawer. At the dildo the 'toy' had been nestled against when he opened it.

"No-one sent me, this is my apartment. Who sent you?"

Oliver / Green Arrow | Arrow | m/m

[something_else]

Tom Paris | Star Trek Voyager

[stilla90skid]

Tony Stark // MCU // OTA

[call_4766626]

[spider_m4n]

Normally, all that Peter salvaged when he went dumpster diving was old tech or something he could hopefully pull apart to use the parts for one of his projects. Occassionally, he would find something he thought maybe May would find cute and that she'd like in their apartment.

For the first time, Peter had found a piece of furniture he actually kept for himself. It was nothing special, just this small cupboard he thought it would be neat to keep his action figures stored in, maybe?

Making space on his desk, Peter grabbed the only figure he kept there, always at hand and watching over his work. His old Iron Man figure.

With a warm smile on his lips, Peter placed the figure in the cupboard, almost toying with the idea. He closed the door and, almost playfully, locked it, since the key was there and clearly waiting to be used. This wouldn't work, he couldn't keep that token of good luck out of his sight for long. He unlocked it, opened the door.

And he wasn't ready for what he found inside.

[call_4766626]

Darkness. Sudden darkness. Tony would assume that he was still in bed, except that he was on his feet and in the suit. Automatically, the suit started to kick in and send out a light to illuminate what was clearly some kind of room. Maybe a cell?

"FRIDAY?" No answer.

Light flooded the cell as fast as he'd registered the darkness. Tony spun around ready to take on whoever or whatever it was. He wasn't ready for what he was confronted with though and fell back on his metal ass.


(ooc: Pre-meeting? Because a teenage Peter with a miniature Tony is so wrong it's right...)

[spider_m4n]

Are you meaning to say his most beloved action figure, his good luck science charm and companion on tech adventures has actually always have lights on it and Peter had never noticed before?!

"Since when do you do that?" He huffed out a laugh, reaching out to pick the toy. He had to admit, it looked weird. Shinnier, for a plastic figure. Was the light tricking his eyes?

Peter pinched him by the waist between his thumb, the rest of his fingers on Iron Man's back, then picked him up.

"Since when do your knees bend like that?" The toys legs had always been stiff! Did May buy him a new one?

(ooc: That's perfect! Peter's wetdream! XD)

[call_4766626]

As frightening as the giant hand had been, the nightmare seemed to get worse. There was (of course) a whole body attached to the hand and when he spoke the first thing Tony registered was the question about his knees. Visions of children playing with action figures flooded his mind; boys bending their toys' legs the wrong way, snapping them off at the knee.

"Put me down or I'm open fire!" He warned, turning his head up to his captor.

[spider_m4n]

The second the toy cried out Peter was startlet. He jerked, making the toy jump from his hands, only for Peter to catch him again quickly.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry... I'm-- What?!"

Did his action figure just threatened him? Peter was confused by the discovery of the lights, but he was definitely sure his favorite toy didn't have any sound effects.

"Did you just talk?!"

[call_4766626]

As soon as the giant let go Tony tried to initiate his repulsors but like FRIDAY, they seemed to be offline. Instead he fell through the air for a moment before being caught by clumsy hands again. Tony's head bashed against the inside of his helmet in the process.

"Yes! I did just talk!" He shouted back, his temple hurting. It wasn't the worst tumble he'd ever taken but the suit didn't seem to fit him or function how he was expecting. It was almost like he was wearing a much earlier model than he used now. "Believe me, I'm as surprised as you are that we speak the same language!"

Luca Balsa | Identity V

[allegedprisoner]

[ Normally, I regard the canon's tendency to depict the Survivors as living ragdolls as an asthetic choice, but how bout we make that more literal in this case? Hope you like a ragdoll that can electrocute things. ]

Antonio | Identity V

[infernosonata]

[ If he's in the cupboard, he might not realize it at first and fling cursed music notes at you. They come out looking like balls of demon energy that fly through objects. Have fun. ]

Mystery the Daydreamer | Meikyuu Kingdom OC

[voxstellas]

[ If he's the one with the cupboard, he'll wonder what sort of nonsense Labrynthification has brought this time. If he's in the cupboard he'll probably complain about being elsewhere.

Information in his journal. ]

Cassie Cage | Mortal Kombat | OTA

[nutkrusher]

[Could be either party in this scenario.]

Stan Pines | Gravity Falls | OTA

[beforethefez]

Bucky Barnes | MCU

[freightcars]

[ Smaller for this one. ]

Peter Parker l MCU

[peterparker_spiderling]

(Smaller for this one)

Will Graham ¤ Hannibal

[cognitivus]

( pref. smaller but really either. )