bakerstreet | (no subject)

the USERNAME meme

Journal names. They're something we all think about, and that we often try to make as fittingly torturous to our characters as possible. Isn't it nice that our characters never have to know they're wandering around with that horrible label attached to them?

...wouldn't it be fun if they did?

RULES

1 Your character is communicating with others through a journal community, just like how we're using them, and they are perfectly aware of that fact. Whether they think that's normal or not is totally up to you.

2 The also know that when they signed on to this community, they were automatically assigned a name that supposedly has something to do with their personality and/or history. They didn't have any say in what that name was going to be, they're just stuck with it.

3 Make a post with your character's reaction to seeing what their own username is. Do they think it fits? Do they hate it with a passion? Are they downright confused?

4 Comment to other people's posts with your character's reactions to everyone else's usernames. If they know the other character, they might have good reason to laugh at them or feel sorry for them. If they don't, this could lead to some pretty interesting first impressions, don't you think?

5 If you want to use a name that's different from your actual journal name, just mark that in your post. No need to create a whole new journal just to make your character's life worse for one meme. ;)

6 PROFIT!

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...

It doesn't stop hurting. It never stops.

Don't make it worse.

[but making it worse is our speciality, you know that...]

No. No, no no no... That... that’s...

...is... is what Dad said true? That Snoke only wants me for my power? That he’s using me? That he’ll crush me when he’s finished with me?

[It's a very strange feeling, watching this echo of his past break. He doesn't really know whether or not it's a good thing.]

You knew it was true when he said it, didn't you? You just didn't want to believe it.

I don’t want to believe it NOW either, I...

I just wanted to be free of the pain. And I’m not... i’m not...

No. It didn't work. No matter how far you try to dig into the dark... it never works.

But I can’t go back to the light either. Even if I... even if I HADN’T killed him... I have too much darkness in me to ever go back. I was better off dead! Skywalker, the other students... they all knew it! None of them believed me, even ONCE! I was a monster! I AM a monster!

They were wrong, too.

And the girl, the scavenger... what makes you so sure she’s right?!

[even though she is, and he totally feels it too. But he’s basically having to second guess his entire life. So...]

She's still here.

[It's amazing how much is said with those three words.]

I drove her away, for a while, because I was stubborn. Like you are. So sure I couldn't belong anywhere except mired in the dark. But I belong with her. She doesn't try to make me into something I'm not.

[Just something he was too stupid to admit he actually was for a while.]

How... how can you be so sure of that? That she won’t change her mind like everybody else and throw me, you, us out like space trash?

Because every time I expect her to, she proves me wrong.

But... in a good way?

[seriously, is such a thing possible?]

Yes.

[dare he say it out loud?]

...I want that.

[Clearly, they're getting somewhere.]

She'll still be angry, next time you see her. It will take some time. But not as much as you might imagine.

But the Supreme Leader will sense these feelings... if I have compassion for the girl, he’ll sense it. He’ll know. He’ll be furious.

And if what Dad said was true...

...

I can’t win.

He did sense it, just as he sensed my regret over Dad. There's no avoiding that.

But you can win, assuming I haven't changed things too much by talking to you. I don't think I have, but I won't tell you anything more specific. I don't want him to understand what I mean. You will when you get there.

What? How? WHY?! I don’t understand!!

Just... just wait for the scavenger to come to me and what, are you actually suggesting that instead if fighting EACH OTHER, we join forces to DESTROY the Supreme Leader?!

[Yes, that is exactly what he's saying. But.]

...You'll understand when you get there.

REALLY?! Stop sounding like Uncle Luke!!

[whoops, did he just call him Uncle? Damn it, Kylo, your light side is showing.]

[Just not going to point out that you've actually called him "Uncle Luke" twice now.]

Rude.

[are you insinuating that Kylo thinks before he opens his mouth? That’s giving your past self way too much credit.]

You’re NOT HELPING!!

You honestly expect me to believe that I HAVE the strength to do it... but I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do!

[He is only insinuating that that was rude.]

It's not about strength. It's a matter of finding the right moment to act--and if I tell you what that means, then there's a chance he'll find out and ruin it. But the proof that everything I've been saying is possible is in the fact that I'm still standing. I figured it out without anyone telling me. You will, too.

[not denying it...]

...ok.

Ok, I’ll trust her. I’ll trust her... But if she DARES betray me like everyone else, I am NOT holding back!

Heh.

[Hi, old me, I don't miss you.]

She'll want you to come back to the Resistance with her. I'm not telling you to. Just listen to her and don't immediately try to kill them all.

(no subject)

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