ｌｅａｄ ｆｉｓｈ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ldfsh) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
bakerstreet2020-05-09 09:31 am
ldfsh) wrote in bakerstreet2020-05-09 09:31 am
Entry tags:
- he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
- Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
- U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
- i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
- On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
- text him!
1, we just get to pretend the mythos is culturally-appropriate because i can't resist
mannerless
- 2020-05-09 21:40 (UTC) - Expand1 → Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
2 → You fail at everything in life besides blacking out.
3 → He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
4 → I don't think he knows you can do that sober...
5 → text him ( original or remake timeline okay! )
2 → You fail at everything in life besides blacking out.
3 → He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
4 → I don't think he knows you can do that sober...
5 → text him ( original or remake timeline okay! )
1. Did you pay your friends to not make fun of me?
2. Haha. I have a resting bitch face. He has a I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference.
3. Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been opened, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
4. I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
5. Text him!
2. Haha. I have a resting bitch face. He has a I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference.
3. Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been opened, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
4. I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
5. Text him!
1) He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood.
2) I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am.
3) Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
4) Text him
2) I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am.
3) Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
4) Text him
You don't have to do that. I'm the one calling you out so it doesn't really seem fair.
1. Sitting on the floor in my living room... eating pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other.
2. He told me he needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while.
3. According to the calendar event that I put in my phone last night, I'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... I really hope I didn't miss something important.
4. Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
5. How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
6. Text him!
2. He told me he needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while.
3. According to the calendar event that I put in my phone last night, I'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... I really hope I didn't miss something important.
4. Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
5. How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
6. Text him!
Edited 2020-05-09 13:53 (UTC)
None! Those are for dessert, not a meal replacement!
a. i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
b. he told me that he's proud of our abnormality as a couple. i think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
c. no. you're getting a Viking funeral and i'm pawning your shit.
d. it is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
or choose your own.
a. i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
b. you left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a paddington bear statue in peru.
c. it's a family event: you have to drink. no way around it. Its the law.
d. my breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. my fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
or choose your own. no season five spoilers pls. i live in hell..
still, my past mistakes should be kept in the past. i am a business owner! i have to be respectable.
( Except no one really thinks David Rose is all that fancy. Fussy, yes. Purveyor of fashion choice beyond the small town? Sure. Respectable? No way. )
also i have to apologise for the entire time i failed to realise you'd actually come from a small town like this. now that i am in one i know for sure it can be hell.
i miss starbucks
( He doesn't know exactly where Derry is, but he can project. )
( Except no one really thinks David Rose is all that fancy. Fussy, yes. Purveyor of fashion choice beyond the small town? Sure. Respectable? No way. )
also i have to apologise for the entire time i failed to realise you'd actually come from a small town like this. now that i am in one i know for sure it can be hell.
i miss starbucks
( He doesn't know exactly where Derry is, but he can project. )
1. So are you gonna donate or not?
2. No. Last time you were here, you didn't bother to clean your mess.
3. THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
4. I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
[Wildcard]
2. No. Last time you were here, you didn't bother to clean your mess.
3. THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
4. I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
[Wildcard]
Aerith Gainsborough | Final Fantasy VII Remake or FF VII OG
mythrilrod
2020-05-09 02:24 pm (UTC)(link)
1. need you on the dancefloor.
2. i could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you.
3. okay, this game isn’t funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
4. i need to make up a silly nickname for you. that’s a sign of friendship.
5. you climbed out your own window and walked in the front door.
2. i could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you.
3. okay, this game isn’t funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
4. i need to make up a silly nickname for you. that’s a sign of friendship.
5. you climbed out your own window and walked in the front door.
[OOC: From here!]
oh. sorry, that wasn't for you.
thanks, though. i'm sure i'll find them. if the culprit doesn't give them back then tifa's sure gonna be mad!
oh. sorry, that wasn't for you.
thanks, though. i'm sure i'll find them. if the culprit doesn't give them back then tifa's sure gonna be mad!
1: I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
2: I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
3: I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
4: They're taking me to medbay. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
5: [Or text her!]
2: I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
3: I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
4: They're taking me to medbay. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
5: [Or text her!]
1: Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
2: I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
3: You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
4: Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me the good painkillers and juice.
5: [w i l d c a r d]
2: I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
3: You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
4: Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me the good painkillers and juice.
5: [w i l d c a r d]
1. She is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
2. You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends vaginas at once the door got kicked down.
3. You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
4. I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
5. [Text her.]
2. You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends vaginas at once the door got kicked down.
3. You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
4. I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
5. [Text her.]
1: As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
2: Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
3: This long distance relationship is really killing our sex life.
4: I made a nest in your bed. I'm not leaving
5: [choose your own adventure]
2: Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
3: This long distance relationship is really killing our sex life.
4: I made a nest in your bed. I'm not leaving
5: [choose your own adventure]
1: I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
2: Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
3: I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
4: My life is far too together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
5: [dealer's choice]
2: Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
3: I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
4: My life is far too together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
5: [dealer's choice]
1. she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
2. YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
3. did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
2. YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
3. did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
1. She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
2. I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
3. I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
4. The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
2. I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
3. I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
4. The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
1. for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
2. My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
3. Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
4. I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
2. My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
3. Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
4. I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
1: like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
2: He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
3: I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
4: How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
5: [Or text her!]
2: He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
3: I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
4: How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
5: [Or text her!]
casually walks in with a freshly-baked pining pie for the dangerous potluck
traitooor
- 2020-05-09 19:11 (UTC) - Expandso rude, how dare it. i'm like pls can't u see i'm in the middle of something, laptop?!
thesefirststeps
- 2020-05-12 06:48 (UTC) - Expandright in the middle of my feels, though? terrible.
thesefirststeps
- 2020-05-13 04:30 (UTC) - Expandrude, i need my feels, how dare it deprive me of my heart breaking with every new tag
thesefirststeps
- 2020-05-15 18:43 (UTC) - Expand1. I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
2. Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
3. Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
4. When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
2. Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
3. Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
4. When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
1. My phone autocorrected your name to ‘Grownup.’ That couldn’t be more inaccurate. I’m getting a new phone.
2. Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening??
3. Oh my Lord. It is too early in the morning to be that horny.
4. Open!
2. Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening??
3. Oh my Lord. It is too early in the morning to be that horny.
4. Open!
1. How you run into a glsss door three times in a row I do not know.
2. He gave me a beer, pat my head, and called me kiddo.
3. I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
4. Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
5. Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
6. Text him!
2. He gave me a beer, pat my head, and called me kiddo.
3. I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
4. Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
5. Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
6. Text him!
Hmmm where in the game's timeline should this be taking place anyway LOL
jokersonyou
2020-05-09 03:11 pm (UTC)(link)
( continued from here )
Go right ahead. And you'll have to forgive the curry not being at 100% since it's leftovers heated up, but honestly, it's usually at a 120% as it is. I'm torn between being sick to death of it and still loving it. It sucks.
[He snorts, taking the container out of the ice-crammed fridge carefully while Akechi meanders off to change. It's easy enough to scoop it into a waiting pot and get the stove going to heat it up. There seems to be enough for the both of them. He gets some rice started as well which won't take long, then... Well, might as well make some coffee to go with it, yeah? Even if it is night. Ren has a feeling Akechi wouldn't care about that, so off to brewing he goes.]
Go right ahead. And you'll have to forgive the curry not being at 100% since it's leftovers heated up, but honestly, it's usually at a 120% as it is. I'm torn between being sick to death of it and still loving it. It sucks.
[He snorts, taking the container out of the ice-crammed fridge carefully while Akechi meanders off to change. It's easy enough to scoop it into a waiting pot and get the stove going to heat it up. There seems to be enough for the both of them. He gets some rice started as well which won't take long, then... Well, might as well make some coffee to go with it, yeah? Even if it is night. Ren has a feeling Akechi wouldn't care about that, so off to brewing he goes.]
1. I denied three other people and puked everywhere because I love you.
2. Is Tylenol and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
3. How do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
4. No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch.
5. I almost accidentally threw them out a window during sex last night.
2. Is Tylenol and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
3. How do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
4. No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch.
5. I almost accidentally threw them out a window during sex last night.
1. Protocol on turning down a date from someone who works in the Shinra building?
2. I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
3. There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
4. I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting.
5. (Text her! New threads welcome too!)
2. I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
3. There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
4. I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting.
5. (Text her! New threads welcome too!)
Let's move past the theory that you ever have good ideas.
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