BDSM Lifestyle

[1sts]

The BDSM Lifestyle Meme

BDSM isn't all about the sex. Sure, handcuffs, whips and chains, toys, power and control-play can be fun, but sometimes it's about the other stuff too. The little stuff. The ways you and your partner give yourselves to each other every day.

So this is a meme to play out safe, sane, consensual and maybe even non-sexual BDSM.

If you want more information, check out:

The Ten Golden Rules of BDSM Negotiation
Sexuality.Org's BDSM Index
The Keys to A Relationship
Extreme Restraints

Be warned: Threads and prompts below may contain triggers, and will contain sexual content.



THE EVERYDAY:
1. feeding: using him as a plate? having her kneel and accept hand-feeding? maybe someone's been very good and should have a tasty reward.
2. bathing: after all, you have to take care of your partner. it's nice to have someone to get lotion in those hard-to-reach places.
3. talking/therapy: how are you going to work out this relationship? what obstacles do you have to overcome?
4. massage: some intimate relaxation.
5. dates: it's good to go out every once in a while.
6. negotiation: to work out what kinks are and are not okay.
7. nonsexual bondage: gags, bridles, chastity belts. some people just like the security of bondage in everyday life.
8. humiliation/in public: take your pet out to show her off; bend him over a bench and spank him for bad behavior.
9. animal play: pony play, pet play.
10. punishment/discipline: someone's been bad. maybe it's time for a time-out. or maybe someone has to clean the bathroom with a toothbrush.
11. other

THE SEXUAL:
1. the light stuff: some handcuffs, some ropes. nothing too extreme. maybe one partner or the other is afraid; maybe it's just time to take a break from the trappings and have some love-making.
2. bondage: chains, or elaborately knotted ropes, or full-body bindings. maybe even suspension in midair.
3. caning/whipping/spanking: for punishment and for enjoyment of the pain.
4. shaving: you like them with smooth skin. no beards, no lovetrail, no hairy legs.
5. piercing/tattooing: a permanent mark of devotion.
6. sensory deprivation: gags, blindfolds, earplugs, to shut out the rest of the world.
7. as therapy: exploring a past trauma or fear.
8. first time: one partner or another is experiencing the kink lifestyle for the first time.
9. kink parties: for casual play. mind the rules; drugs and alcohol are rarely tolerated, and all play must be consensual. or else the host or hostess might get angry.
10. orgasm denial/forced orgasm: until they beg for it, or beg you to stop.
11. ageplay: perhaps someone wants to be treated like a child. maybe a little daddy or mommy kink to go along with it.
12. role-play: taking on roles. master-slave, teacher-student, dragon prince and slave-dancer -- your imagination's the limit.
13. genital torture: pain where you're the most sensitive.
14. electricity: to give things a spark.
15. medical fetish: sounding, stirrups, speculums -- oh, doctor.
16. fucking machines: it'll keep in the same rhythm, no matter how much you beg.
17. other

Comments

Caduceus Clay | Critical Role C2 | M/M

[caduceus_clay]

[A big, gentle Dom. Afterplay would be fun to do...

No pet play/age play/torture. Big yes to fucking machines, magic and its use in the bedroom, and orgasm play. Most things negotiable, feel free to DM!

Other CR muses available (Molly, Caleb, Keyleth, Vax, Percy) just ask!! Also OTA canonmates (both campaigns!)]

Mollymauk Tealeaf | Critical Role | OTA

[viciousmaukeries]

((ooc: Very much a switch. When domming, he's more of a service top, and when subbing he's kind of a brat. Molly also has a mild hypnotic ability that, with extensive previous discussion and consent, he would be up for using to help a partner get into the right headspace. So if your character isn't naturally a sub or a dom but you want to experiment with that, there's an option. You can find more information in the "Magical" section of his First Impressions meme.

For the Everyday, I'm especially interested in 3, 4, 6, 7, 10. For the sexual, I'm interested in 1, 2, 3, 6, 7, or 8. Molly would be especially into 3 if he's subbing, particularly if some mild bloodplay is involved, or 7 if he's domming. You can find a kink list on his journal if necessary.))

[caduceus_clay]

[A modern Caddy? My boy is honestly mostly ace, so he enjoys his partner getting off more than he enjoys actually getting off, so really anything would be good...

Some combo of the therapy/talking/massage prompts and the sensory deprivation one might be nice? Or we can do something a bit heavier, I'm really very open to anything lol]

Harry Dresden | Dresden Files | OTA

[wizard_dresden]

[ ooc: he's a sub; very into edging and bondage; kink list is here; game for any except animal/pet play and age play ]

[witherings]

( are you game for ocs? i have info in the journal if you'd like to take a peek and see if it suits, happy to play them as male or female and a dom/domme depending c: )

dr. june moone | dceu | ota

[exhumings]

[ Less here for the minutiae of proper BDSM or rule lawyering - too much contrivance isn't of much interest - but more about putting June with a partner she can trust implicitly. The Enchantress taking up residence in her mind's left her more than a little fucky, so she could let go every now and then. Basically, somebody who can take the reins...

...even if their life's also a wreck, let's just be disasters together. Turnabout's also fair play! She'll take the lead and help her partner decompress on occasion, too. ]

Bruce Wayne | DCEU

[nanananananananabatman]

(Willing to sub, but more interested in being a gentle dom. Likes to look after people, which can include causing pain in certain ways if that’s what his partner wants. Let’s talk!)

[flybybirdie]

(( would you be up to playing with a Dick? ))

Wren Winter | Original Character | OTA

[winterwren]

[She's very much the sub. She's a good girl overall but can be a brat if that's what someone is looking for.

For everyday, no to 9. For Sexual, no to 11, 13, 14, 15.

Any questions, feel free to hit my DMs.]

dorian pavus | dragon age | m/m

[wines]

[down for non-sexual + sexual options; potentially switchy depending on his partner but leans sub.

NO: animal play, ageplay/incest play, medical fetish (including needles), scat/golden showers

YES: bathing, negotiation, humiliation, punishment/discipline, bondage, impact play, piercing/tattooing, sensory dep, therapy/catharsis, first time, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, roleplay, electricity, fucking machines, probably up for other stuff as well--just ask!

no cole, please! open to most castmates otherwise.]

[stormbreaks]

( au where the world of thedas is under thor's protection and he dallies with the mortals from time to time? c: happy to play him as a dom. )

cullen rutherford | dragon age | ota

[repent]

[down for non-sexual + sexual options; switchy depending on his partner.

NO: animal play, medical fetish (including needles), scat/golden showers

YES: bathing, negotiation, humiliation, punishment/discipline, nonsexual + sexual bondage, impact play, sensory dep, therapy/catharsis, first time, orgasm denial/forced orgasm, genital torture, probably up for other stuff as well--just ask! especially into him being on the receiving end of discipline/pain-play.

no cole or sera, please! open to most castmates otherwise.]

[ambassadrice]

Shigure | Fire Emblem: Fates | OTA

[shigure]

[He's a switch, leaning towards dom.

Favorites for Everyday: 2,4,5,8. Sexual: 1,2,3,4,6,8,10, and 11. No real hard-no's save for genital torture.]

[ebony_wings]

[[So any interest in a sub? She's a seamstress who likes goth-y clothes if Shigure's got a thing for clothing. I'm interested in 5/8 (as long as it doesn't go into large crowds/full degradation) for nonsexual and 1/2/6 for sexual.]]

Stiles Stilinski | Teen Wolf

[snarkycomments]

[ sub. open to pretty much everything, Kink list ]

Thor | MCU | OTA

[notstrongestavenger]

[ Would be playing him as the sub. Open to everything but first time. Most interested in having elements in orgasm denial mixed in with whatever else. ]

Re: Thor | MCU | OTA

[rogersed]

[interested in a Steve?]

Jemma Simmons | Agents of SHIELD

[biochemistry]

[ota with f/f preference; this one is definitely, 100% submissive, and she needs a partner who will take care of her and praise her and that will let her take care of them in return. She really, really wants to be a good girl, alright?

Big yeses are bondage, sensory deprivation (or rather blindfolds and gags, because thanks to canon trauma she'll probably attack you if you try to take her hearing), general caretaking stuff (especially if she or her partner is normally stubborn about letting people help and this is a way to get it to happen), orgasm delay and gentle overstimulation.

Big nos are humiliation, punishment, painplay (spanking is a maybe, sensation like ice/wax and fingernails are good, anything else is definitely a no), bathroom kinks, age/pet/slave/consent play, dub/non-con in general.

Ask if you have questions.]

Mera | Aquaman

[xebella]

[ota; she's not the most experienced in this way (it might even be her first time playing) but she's very adventurous once you get her out of her somewhat more proper shell. She's also definitely a switch -- definitely bossy, definitely likes being in control, but with the right person she'd consider letting that slip.

(Translation: she's probably topping Arthur, lovingly of course, but she'd probably let Diana, for example, top her.)

Still sussing out what she's most into, but definite nos are going to be humiliation, bathroom kinks, age/pet/slave/consent play, and dub/non-con in general.

Let's talk the rest out.]

Nymeria Sand | GOT/ASOIAF

[whiplike]

[ota with f/f preference for shipping, modern also available; always the top if she's with a guy, but a little more flexible with others. She's in this for the enjoyment and fun and sensation above all else, not the best perhaps at admitting to more serious feelings but not wholly incapable of it.

Yes to bondage, sensory deprivation, painplay, a little light punishment, orgasm control. She's not a gentle domme, exactly, but she's only mean if you want her to be.

No to humiliation, bathroom kinks, age/pet/slave/consent play, and dub/non-con in general.

Ask if you have questions.]

Nora Gainesborough | True Blood

[mendacium]

[ota; will be the domme unless you happen to be her very certain exception, because she's very particular and has issues with vulnerability. She's strict but rarely cold, and prefers partners that are either also vampires or somehow special largely because then she doesn't have to hold back.

Open to lots of things, but definitely no humiliation, bathroom kinks, age/pet/slave/consent play, or dub/non-con in general. Also, being a vampire means she'll definitely feed on you if permitted, but she won't force the issue or glamour because that's a bad look.

Ask if you have questions.]

Steve Rogers | MCU | ota

[rogersed]

[gentle dom, open to most things]

[not_without_you]

[Feelings about a Bucky? I play him as a switch so a possible rough day could need him being taken down a little? LMK]

Alfred Pennyworth | Gotham | OTA

[inforapound]

[Alfred is very much a service top. As a Dom, he can be very strict but he also wants to give his sub everything they could ever desire from him. He has a kink list here. Can also be played as a sub on request]

[danvers]

[ would love to do something with 11 or 12 if you're at all interested? ]

Sirius Black // Harry Potter series // m/m

[muchfluffveryblackwow]

(( he's definitely a mouthy, bratty sub, but also put a collar on him and he'll do whatever it takes to show that he's a good boy ))

Ruun | original | f/f

[aetherfairy]

[Submissive. There's info on the journal! As a note, if you know what a BDSM AU is, I'd love to use that as a background.]

Juri | oc | m/m

[halfacat]

[soft and fluffy, he's more likely to be sub than dom, but he can be a switch, certainly. info on journal, and BDSM AU would be loved.]

[viciousmaukeries]

((ooc: I don't know what kind of experience level you usually h/c Juri as having, but I'm thinking maybe he's new to the BDSM scene and goes to a kink party to dip his toes into the water, and Molly as a dom kind of takes care of him and walks him through his first experience?))

Konoka Konoe | Mahou Sensei Negima | OTA

[im_gonna_heal_u]

[[For everyday, have at it, though I ask no crazy hoods/animal masks for 9. No genital torture, actual non-con. Switch, but leans sub.

Favorites boil down to everyday 1,2,5,7, and non heavy 8, and sexual 1-7, 10, and 12 (12 being helped by hypnosis can also be interesting...)]]

Alma d'Artaire | OC | F/F

[magesmith]

[[For everyday, have at it, though I ask no crazy hoods/animal masks for 9. No genital torture, actual non-con. 100% domme but will heed good advice from a sub that has better experience.

Alma's a mild sadist in that she likes seeing people squirm. She's enamored by outfits and pretty bondage and the latter comes very easily to her thanks to magic. Due to her line of work she'll often feel guilty about enjoying it, however. Favorites boil down to everyday 1,2,5,7, and non heavy 8, and sexual 1-7, 10, and 12.]]

Noel Wickham | OC

[semper_occultus]

Dom dom dom dom dooommmmm, also won't do: extreme humiliation, animal play, hard torture, medical fetish, role play or really therapy related things. Not that interested in: ageplay, non-sexual extreme things like human furnituring or parading things out in the open (publicly).

Best served: rope bondage, spanking, sensory deprivation, exhaustion, man-handling, trust exercises. lmao

Open for all genitalia.

[cater]

ooc: oh hello.

so human furniture pinged me. I don't know if you've seen the 2011 film Sleeping Beauty, but Lucy is a reckless college girl who becomes a call girl of sorts. She works for a company that lets men do what they want when the girls are asleep, save actually penetrating them. but they also hold these lavish parties with girls in lingerie as servers and... as furniture.

maybe he's been to one of these parties? meets up with her on the outside?

Eames | Inception | OTA

[casuistic]

D/

@paradoxpoint

[casuistic]

Their target is a very elusive man. The only time they can get to him is during his frequent visits to an exclusive sex party. The problem is that they need an in before the target will have his monthly appearance in the party.

Who else would they send in undercover than Arthur and Eames? Anyone else walking into this bizarre experience would definitely flip their shits and Eames in particular has had enough of this job already before they've even started. It's a low hanging fruit and he is bored.

They've gained an invite through a friend of a friend and decided to go in as a couple, hoping that it would make the experience a little less inclusive. Eames has had his brush ins with this sort of thing before - it's not an unfamiliar scene to him - but he doesn't know just how uncomfortable the whole thing makes Arthur. The pointman has a curious way of surprising him from time to time.

Eames has a sharp suit on him, 3-pieces like Arthur's usual attire. He looks comfortable in it, because it's the way he is, walking in the shoes of his character. They arrive to the party, which is held in a fancy manor outside New York. He opens the cab door for Arthur and offers him his arm so they can walk inside.

Bryce Wayne | Rule 63 Nolanverse

[gothamsheiress]

[ Sub-who-is-also-a-control-freak-who-also-craves-approval here, as well as a big ol' masochist. It'd be nice to cede control to someone who can handle it, if she can trust them enough, and it'd be nice to experience intense sensations that don't, you know, come with the threat of actually dying or a whole city getting blown up or whatever.

OTA! F/f or M/f both great, cross-canon CR great. Pass on animal play, in public, ageplay, piercing, and genital torture. ]