It's crazy, but we fit

[reversesock]

THE CRACK PAIRING MEME

crack pairing

An unusual relationship of any kind of fandom (i.e. books, television shows, movies, ect.) that is unlikely to happen.

OR

Randomly take two characters… they don’t have to know each other, they don’t have to show ANY signs of a relationship, and hook them together. That is a crack pairing.

We all know them. Fandoms have fostered these little gems of shipping since the early days, and now, they can even be serious contenders in even the most hostile of shipping wars. Maybe they're absolutely ridiculous and only "for the lulz." Perhaps they make perfect sense...if you squint. Whatever the case may be, these so-called "crack" pairings are not canon and they're nowhere near as popular in fandom as the big fanon pairings.

Most of the time.

Of course, it's important to note that a lot of the time in RP, pairings are always crack pairings. Especially crossover ships, which canon purists would deride purely for being impossible. Still, in memes, that's less likely to happen because people either stick with canon ships, fanon ships, or close CR because of the lack of opportunities for development that games offer.

Not here. This meme is for ALL your ridiculousness, all your high school fangirl dreams, and just plain not being sorry for your ships. Think these characters would be cute together? Go for it. That character have adorable icons and that all you know about them? Ship it, by all means. Here, the reasons come after the desire.

RULES
- Comment with your character and preferences. If you want, you can include a one sentence or so blurb about your character. But blank comments are fine.
- Tag others.

Comments

Bullseye / Marvel 616 / ota

[clozapine]

mantis | mcu | ota

[innerbeauty]

[spoiledbugboy]

[ooc: so less "smut" and more "this boy loves bugs and is just fascinated with Mantis like wow she's so pretty!". You down?]

Luke Skywalker | Star Wars AU | OTA

[dark_luke]

Faith Lehane | BtVS | OTA

[5_x_5]

Ray Palmer | LoT | OTA

[hair_cut]

Freddy Krueger | NOES | OTA

[gloved_n_burned]

Neo | RWBY | F/F or Castmates

[sweet_silence]

((Send me your heroes/protagonists especially if they're cinnamon rolls))

Joker | DC Comics | OTA

[criminallysane]

[ m/f preferred, and i'd especially love to see someone who normally plays for the good guys. but, look, it's a crack meme, so i'm gonna say it's dealer's choice all the way here and there are no wrong answers--throw me anyone you like! shipping or hate-shipping equally welcome. not looking for smut. ]

[curvish]

( ooc | thoughts on succubus queen in a love-hate relationship? )

[criminallysane]

[ I'm canon-blind with her, but "succubus queen" + "love-hate relationship" sounds like a pretty winning combination. I'm game! ]

[curvish]

( ooc | let me know if anything needs to be changed. )

Despite only caring about fighting and her own affairs, Morrigan was a creature who found the human world fascinating. This was rare for creatures of her species, like her, they only lived for the thrill of fighting. They would become so consumed by it, they would lose any bit of humanity they had in them. Morrigan wasn't like that at all-

She was vain, yes, but she was also a very composed being. She was highly intelligent and skilled in many things, as should the queen of Makai be. Regardless she spent more time in the human world than she should have, and somehow found herself spending time with a criminal. She was no stranger to men- she had been with many in the many years she had been alive. In a way it was her nature. Though there was something about The Joker that allured her- like a moth to light.

Today was one of those rare days were Morrigan found herself waiting for the other. She sat in the dark in his hideout, sitting on a chair with her feet up on the table before it. She sat in a relaxed, almost lazy like manner. Her long sharp nails were curled up on the armrest, gently scratching away at the material. Her other arm was propped up under her head, her teeth biting down on the nails of her other hand.

She was in her succubus form now, bat wings resting high and proud against the sides of her head, her partially-exposed chest rising up and down with each breath. Morrigan remained like this even when the door opened and Joker made his way in.

"Annoying.", she sighed, remaining in the same position. "You know I hate waiting."

[criminallysane]

[ OOC: This is perfect, and I'm so sorry to just now be tagging you back! ]

Joker had spent the better part of the afternoon at Gotham's docks, tracking down former associates and assembling a crew for his next job. He enjoyed recruiting. He liked finding out what old friends had been up to: what scores they'd landed, who'd been killed, who'd seen the Bat. He loved the almost-reverent way aspiring new criminals looked at him, and the subtle glint of fear in the eyes of some of the old-timers. Mostly, though, he just plain liked being around crooks. In the dank strip clubs and warehouses near the waterfront, surrounded by colleagues with names like Skinny and The Nose, a man could relax and feel at home.

And, well. Time flew.

Now it was considerably later than he'd intended, and a chilly early-evening rain had begun to fall over the city and had caught him without an umbrella. By the time Joker made it back to his hideout, he was cold and hungry and soaked. He let himself in, thinking about what to order for dinner, and was already peeling his sodden jacket off when he heard her voice in the dark.

Ah, right. The Succubus.

Fuck.

He flipped a switch by the door, and the florescent light overhead kicked on with a quiet hum. Half-out of his jacket, with his hair dripping cold rainwater down his forehead and neck, Joker put on his best fake smile and turned to the woman waiting for him.

Who, of course, looked as perfect as if she were sitting for a portrait. A... rather cranky portrait.

The first time he'd seen Morrigan, Joker had been certain she was a hallucination, the result perhaps of switching off his Arkham meds too quickly. And who could blame him? A beautiful, scantily-clad woman whose hair was a shade of green as lovely as his own and who had, oh yes, bat wings sprouting from her head? She was almost too on-the-nose, as far as hallucinations went. It was impossible to imagine that she might be real, so he hadn't been as careful with her as he should have been.

A mistake that, clearly, he was still paying for.

"Buttercup." He slipped his other arm out of the jacket, folded the garment, and draped it over the back of a down-on-its-luck folding chair. His shirt, he was pleased to see, was still relatively dry. "I do so love coming home and finding you lurking in the dark. And so cheerfully, too!"

He looked about for something nearby that could serve as a towel, spotted a sweatshirt a henchman had forgotten, and put it into service blotting the worst of the rain from his hair. "You know, perhaps you wouldn't have been waiting if you didn't insist on meeting at such odd hours. And in such private places..." He glanced back at her, a hint of actual amusement lighting up his eyes. "I imagine you'd have been quite welcome at any of the fine establishments I've seen today, let me tell you. Although then you'd be denied the pleasure of annoying me with these little tête-à-têtes, hm? And god knows we wouldn't want that."

Ada Wong ✯ Biohazard (Resident Evil) ✩ OTA

[wineredlips]

[ Mun gets a kick out of Odd Pairings. So, have a feast. ]

Wanda Maximoff | Marvel Cinematic Universe

[divaricate]

Eddie Brock/Venom | Venom (2018) | M/M

[slimyteeth]

Anders | Dragon Age | m/m

[rebelhealer]

[praypal]

[ OK I can see this totally working in a jamjar setting, and I need to voicetest Kurt with an m/m pairing if you're interested? ]

[rebelhealer]

[Sounds good. Anders is in a jamjar game atm or we can just make one up.]

[praypal]

[I am willing to be vague and handwavey for the sake of what works better for the CR. I say we see what happens by improvising it. And lmk if anything needs changing.]

Getting to know one Kurt Wagner is a pretty simple series of dialog wheel choices- despite his admittedly demonic appearance, he is one of the more genial interdimensional kidnapping victims, heart worn proudly on his sleeve. He's easy to grow close to, as well. Especially with those who've lived something of a shared experience to his- outsiders and outcasts, people looked down up on for their differences.

He'd never really expected a relationship quite like this, but the heart wants what it wants. He's well past the point of looking for familiar faces among strangers. Hope and prayer only gets you so far, and someone who understands the way he lived before this place.

He strongly suspects there are things Anders hasn't told him about his life before here, but Kurt has never pushed. Maybe partly because he's a bit afraid of what the answers might be.

"If you keep petting my arm, you're going to wear the fur off." Thoughts of what might have been are far from Kurts mind right now. "I will have to start wearing long sleeves." Despite his protests, his tone and body language speak to amusement rather than annoyance.

[rebelhealer]

Anders hadn't really known what to think of Kurt when they first met. Justice had told him he wasn't a demon, and he could do things that even mages back home couldn't. Namely teleport. He seemed nice enough, and they had found common ground quickly enough. Anders is a mage and Kurt's a mutant, and both are hated for what they are back home, to the point where entire death squads are formed just to rid the world of their respective kind.

All of that endeared him to Anders, and he found himself getting all kinds of squishy feelings for Kurt.

"I can't help it," Anders teases, running his fingers down Kurt's arm again. "Your fur is so soft and pretty."

[praypal]

Kurt sighs, though it's an exaggerated, playful thing, just as much as the scolding was. "We really are going to have to find you a cat, or something as close to one as possible," he teases, though he makes no move to stop the touch against his fur.

For all he complains light-heartedly, it's clear enough that with the right person, he doesn't object at all, though- "However, if you'd like to avoid wearing any spots thin, I wouldn't say no to a backrub. Despite my flexibility, I still think I managed to pull something."

[rebelhealer]

"And what if I were to adopt a cat who has days where they don't feel like being petted?" Anders teases right back, running his finger down Kurt's arm.

"I can do that," Anders takes his hand off Kurt's arm finally, his hands going to the hem of the mutant's shirt, fiddling with it. "Take your shirt off and turn around, please."

[praypal]

"I suppose I could be convinced to play substitute," he says, leaning in and kissing his neck, letting his cheek graze Anders' jaw when he draws back. He makes the act of turning around and pulling off his shirt into one easy motion.

"You really are very good with your hands."

[rebelhealer]

Anders takes a moment to admire Kurt's back before he gets to work, placing his hands on the other man's shoulders and starting the massage. Even under the fur, Anders can feel Kurt's lean muscles.

"Let me know if there's a spot you'd like me to concentrate on."

[praypal]

"Well, you are the expert, I'm sure you can feel the tension better than I can direct you to it," he says coyly. His tail uncoils, but only to teasingly snake under Anders' own shirt, with more deft agility than any mere cat would be capable of, letting the spaded end of it run up along his spine.

[rebelhealer]

"Flatterer," Anders begins working Kurt's shoulders, his fingers expertly rubbing and digging into the muscles. Those hands then go a little lower, seeking out any tension spots. His healing hands pinpoint a knot of muscle, and he focuses his efforts on it.

Kurt's flexibility has always impressed Anders, from pulling off feats that most rogues were incapable of, or just using that agility to touch Anders in ways he never thought. He sighs softly as Kurt's tail strokes him under his shirt, feeling it travel up his back, resisting the urge to lean into it and interrupt the massage.

[praypal]

"You could always use more than your hands-" he suggests, tone soft and coy while the tail pulls him closer. "And you've seen how I move- you know the tension isn't just in my back." His voice grows more playful and singsong.

"Mhm, though you really are working some miracles here. I think you may leave me more flexible than I was before."

[rebelhealer]

"When I'm done with you, you'll be doing back flips and climbing things faster than a cat in no time." A small amount of healing magic flow through Anders' hands and into Kurt's body, to ease some of the stress on his muscles.

One of Anders' hands moves to the side of Kurt's waist, near where the torso meets the thigh, massaging him there. "Can't have you getting a cramp at the worst possible time."

Scarecrow | Batman Arkham Knight | M/M

[doctor_terror]

Peter Maximoff | XMCU | M/M

[iwillcatchup]

Nightcrawler * Marvel 616 * OTA

[praypal]

[ Can't guarantee success but willing to throw almost anything at the wall for voicetesting purposes. xover/medium welcome/encouraged, but if I'm canonblind your responses may be slower. ]

Beauty Huston | Beauty | M/F

[beautyshonour]

[available in original historical-fantasy canon or modernized AU versions.]

Simon (PL600) | Detroit: Become Human | OTA

[ourheartsarecompatible]

[Crosscanon and OCs very welcome.]

Rey | Star Wars

[aforcetobereckonedwith]

Roose Bolton | A Song of Ice & Fire | m/f

[rooseontheloose]

[Be warned, Roose is a cold and merciless person, so there will not be much in the way of fluff. Not looking for smut atm, fade to black is okay.]

dick grayson ( dc )

[trapezings]