BDSM LIFESTYLE

[1sts]

The BDSM Lifestyle Meme

BDSM isn't all about the sex. Sure, handcuffs, whips and chains, toys, power and control-play can be fun, but sometimes it's about the other stuff too. The little stuff. The ways you and your partner give yourselves to each other every day.

So this is a meme to play out safe, sane, consensual and maybe even non-sexual BDSM.

If you want more information, check out:

The Ten Golden Rules of BDSM Negotiation
Sexuality.Org's BDSM Index
The Keys to A Relationship
Extreme Restraints

Be warned: Threads and prompts below may contain triggers, and will contain sexual content.



THE EVERYDAY:
1. feeding: using him as a plate? having her kneel and accept hand-feeding? maybe someone's been very good and should have a tasty reward.
2. bathing: after all, you have to take care of your partner. it's nice to have someone to get lotion in those hard-to-reach places.
3. talking/therapy: how are you going to work out this relationship? what obstacles do you have to overcome?
4. massage: some intimate relaxation.
5. dates: it's good to go out every once in a while.
6. negotiation: to work out what kinks are and are not okay.
7. nonsexual bondage: gags, bridles, chastity belts. some people just like the security of bondage in everyday life.
8. humiliation/in public: take your pet out to show her off; bend him over a bench and spank him for bad behavior.
9. animal play: pony play, pet play.
10. punishment/discipline: someone's been bad. maybe it's time for a time-out. or maybe someone has to clean the bathroom with a toothbrush.
11. other

THE SEXUAL:
1. the light stuff: some handcuffs, some ropes. nothing too extreme. maybe one partner or the other is afraid; maybe it's just time to take a break from the trappings and have some love-making.
2. bondage: chains, or elaborately knotted ropes, or full-body bindings. maybe even suspension in midair.
3. caning/whipping/spanking: for punishment and for enjoyment of the pain.
4. shaving: you like them with smooth skin. no beards, no lovetrail, no hairy legs.
5. piercing/tattooing: a permanent mark of devotion.
6. sensory deprivation: gags, blindfolds, earplugs, to shut out the rest of the world.
7. as therapy: exploring a past trauma or fear.
8. first time: one partner or another is experiencing the kink lifestyle for the first time.
9. kink parties: for casual play. mind the rules; drugs and alcohol are rarely tolerated, and all play must be consensual. or else the host or hostess might get angry.
10. orgasm denial/forced orgasm: until they beg for it, or beg you to stop.
11. ageplay: perhaps someone wants to be treated like a child. maybe a little daddy or mommy kink to go along with it.
12. role-play: taking on roles. master-slave, teacher-student, dragon prince and slave-dancer -- your imagination's the limit.
13. genital torture: pain where you're the most sensitive.
14. electricity: to give things a spark.
15. medical fetish: sounding, stirrups, speculums -- oh, doctor.
16. fucking machines: it'll keep in the same rhythm, no matter how much you beg.
17. other

Comments

Stiles Stilinski | Teen Wolf | OTA

[snarkycomments]

[ kinks. Sub side, open to everyday prompts or the sexual side. ]

john murphy | the 100 | ota

[mofi]

[ murphy is a sub. open to everything but genital torture. ]

Sherlock Holmes || Sherlock BBC || m/m

[desecrated]

[ sub. No ageplay, whipping or genital torture. As therapy would be awesome, but not mandatory. ]

Loki | mcu | ota

[shiftedshape]

[Can dom, but I'm interested in subbing. I'm okay with everything above but animal play and age play.]

Thor ( MCU ) OTA

[notstrongestavenger]

[ wanting to play him on the sub side. No ageplay ]

aspen | oc | m/m

[terraria]

[ Switch. Can be a gentle but strict dom, or a bratty and affectionate sub. Open to everyday and smut options! No whips or genital torture, though. 18+ only. ]

/makes shit up as I go

[worldinnovator]

[ If Aspen thought he was going three full months without someone taking a more personal interest in him and wanting to take things a step further, their first actual dinner "date" would be a very enlightening experience. True to his word, Sinbad was much less subtle in his interest this time around, making it clear what he wanted and watching carefully to see if perhaps this time Aspen would be interested in their evening going further than a mere meal and flirtation between them. And this time they were in the privacy of his own apartment high in the city, surrounded by decadent luxury that all seemed designed with the intent of pleasure and seduction in mind. ]

Jemma Simmons | Agents of SHIELD

[biochemistry]

[ota with f/f preference, and by golly she's the very most submissive ("I like following the rules and doing what’s expected of me. It makes me feel nice"). What she's most interested in is a dom/me who will tell her what to do and tell her she's a good girl (but also let her take care of them in return because she doesn't want to be selfish!). She doesn't like pain or punishment, humiliation or hardcore pretend (no age/pet/consent play) but don't let that fool you, she's very into intense bondage (sexual or non) and sensory deprivation (blindfolds and gags are great, but she'll freak out if you try to take her hearing, thanks trauma) and generally just being subspaced out. Positive scenes, please! More extensive prefs are in her journal.]

Nymeria Sand | GOT/ASOIAF

[whiplike]

[ota with f/f preference, modern also available, quite the little switch (but while she'll play either role with a woman, she only dommes men) who's really just looking for a good time. Caretaking is great, kinky sex is great, and greatest of all consensually rough scenes followed by aftercare! Yes to leaving marks, no to any that will become permanent; yes to bondage etc., no to situations where she's totally vulnerable; yes to D/s and light roleplay, no to ageplay/petplay/anything dub/non-consensual.]

Nemuri Kayama (Midnight) | My Hero Academia

[adultonlyhero]

ana amari | overwatch | f/f with exceptions

[sightlines]

[ hey I really wanna write ana as the top in an unwholesome D/s relationship with a subordinate and/or younger person. down for AUs into other characters' canons or a totally different setting. everything in the list is good except animal play, ageplay and medical stuff.

I can write starters, just hit me up.

I am also open to do D/s stuff with jack and gabe, esp if the context is them being poly! ]

[nerfedtonurse]

[I can offer you an Angela, a Widowmaker?]

Ren Suzugamori | Cardfight!! Vanguard | OTA

[thedarkbond]

[[18+ characters only, down for setting AUs or game AUs or what have you. Ren's willing to switch, though he can be a bit of a difficult bottom/top from the bottom sort, and while he prefers men he's fine with women as well. No to petplay, ageplay and role-play - I'm absolutely fine with everything else on the list, but I'd be particularly interested in bondage (sexual or nonsexual), sensory deprivation and orgasm denial if Ren's on the receiving end.]]

[thetaintedsorrow]

[OOC: How about continuing from the bar thread? A brothel setting would have all kinds of fun equipment. In fact I can pick right back up from there if you want!

I’m down for bondage and sensory deprivation to start, if that sounds cool.]

Meenah Peixes | Homestuck | OTA

[shoalful]

[[18+ characters preferred, though castmates can hit me up to discuss exceptions considering it's canon Meenah will roll with people significantly younger than her. Meenah leans towards top but she can bottom as well, and she's completely open to any gender. Nos are petplay, ageplay and role-play, up for everything else on the list or combining stuff, especially with bondage scenarios.]]

Hela | Thor: Ragnarok | f/m

[helapowerful]

[ The dom. Primarily looking for canonmates for this one. Thor and Loki welcome. Mostly interested in punishment, humiliation, bondage etc. ]

Feel fee to switch up styles if you prefer brackets - also if you want something diff let me know!

[notstrongestavenger]

Thor had never really experienced utter defeat in the way that Hela has defeated him. Now, she is in command of Asgard and he is beneath her, utterly and completely. She's kept him in chains, specially forged to contain him, of course. His cock and balls were even locked away in an uncomfortably tight cage. She enjoyed subjecting him to punishments, to humiliation in front of others. Somewhere along the line the horror of the others had turned into a sick sort of anticipation for when she would do so.

Somewhere along the line, Thor had started to like it too, his cock often straining in it's cage but unable to get fully hard leaving him frustrated sexually and the tender flesh in pain from the tight constriction.

This day, he was naked at her feet, on his knees. His legs were in a spreader to keep him from closing up if she decided to display him in some way. His arms were bound tightly behind his back. There were others staring, it was humiliating to be debased to this, but he was also feeling the painful flare of arousal at it too. The shame was the worst part, the fact that he liked this despite himself.

"Release me," he says lowly, words only met for her.

Poe Dameron (AU) • Star Wars • ota

[poeticforce]

[ Switch, very dependent on partner/situation; he's more of a pleaser than a selfish lover regardless of role. More willing to be submissive/deferential with certain women. I would love using light bondage/restraints/blindfolding to work through past trauma, either actually doing it or just discussing/talking it out (or both). Also interested in role reversal, or general experimenting with dynamics while trying to not be obvious about it in public. In general open to most of the prompts but again, dependent on his partner/the situation and which side of things he'd be on. For sure not interested in: animal play (the writer is a yes but the muse is a no, sadly), shaving, kink parties (unless incorporated into some kind of mission), or ageplay. ]

Ignis Scientia | Final Fantasy XV | M/M

[fairygodspecs]

[Cast mates and cross canon welcome. Can play any role and any scenario.]

Yosuke Hanamura | Persona 4 | OTA

[nohomomura]

[Welcome to all. Definitely a sub for Yosuke with super self-esteem issues, but eager to please the right person. Can Age Up.]

Flynn Scifo || Tales of Vesperia || OTA

[divine_streak]

[He's very likely to be the sub, but he can dom when asked to.

Kinks on journal. Open to all scenarios, but would like to avoid piercing (tattooing is fine), and genital torture.]

Iseul Song | Old World of Darkness (Corax) | M/M

[crepo]

[ ooc: Is it Power Bottom Appreciation Day yet? ]

Shiro | Voltron Legendary Defender | M/M

[gayspacedaddy]

[Open to all. High preference for Sub, but can do dom?]

connor | detroit: become human

[greeted]

( m/m preferred unless previously discussed, no preference re: dom/sub, can do both. kink list for reference )

north | detroit: become human

[detesting]

( ota, north is Very Dom, kink list for reference, some preferences in her journal for the curious - obviously disregarding the sexual content section )

Mollymauk Tealeaf | Critical Role

[ageneroustip]

[ switchable! ]

Hope Van Dyne | MCU

[howyoupunch]

[ D O M . ]

thor → mcu

[stormbreaks]

( ota m/f and m/m! prefer no mcu ocs, but normal ocs are cool by me c: no 9/everyday and no 11/sexual. 2/4/6 in everyday are a+ as well as 1/2/3/4 in sexual.

flexible on everything else, pm if you wanna chat! happy to write thor as a switch, tho i a slight pref. for him being the dom. )

feel free to switch up styles ! hope the assumed cr is okay

[hulkverde]

Bruce didn't think this was the greatest idea. It wasn't his idea. It wasn't Thor's either but Thor had been completely on board for it it seemed and Bruce had taken longer to warm up to it. It's not that the feelings between them hadn't morphed into romantic somewhere along the way but...

It seemed to him that using sex as a tool to try and draw the big guy out was dangerous and rather stupid. But it was all aimed at helping him shift control, push the Hulk into wanting to take it.

He really doesn't think that it will work, that the Hulk would be so easily manipulated but it was worth a try and experimenting is in his nature after all.

They were starting rather simple. Bruce naked, hands tight in a soft rope lightly behind his back. Even without the Hulk he'd be able to get free if he really wanted to and Thor would stop if Bruce needed him to -- Bruce trusted him for that.

"I can't believe I am letting you spank me," he says, resigned to the idea.

Konoka Konoe | Mahou Sensei Negima | OTA

[im_gonna_heal_u]

[[Going either way, preferring F/F if she's a top and probably goes the gentle route. No genital torture.]]