The Toddlers & Tiara Meme

[tiare]

Maybe you've always had a child with this person, and you've been doing your best to be a good and competent parent. Oooor, the two of you have ended up with a "daughter" somehow, perhaps out of thin air or a liaison from the past or anything, really. If all that's not hard enough, there's more! For some reason, you have to enter her into America's new favorite pastime: glitz beauty pageants!

In case you haven't seen the Emmy award winning program Toddlers and Tiaras (you're really missing out), a glitz beauty pageant is:

A type of pageant that allows makeup on young children and babies as well as clothing covered in rhinestones. These pageants focus specifically on beauty. The opposite of a glitz pageant would be a natural/ scholarship pageant. Contestants also wear hair extensions, flippers (fake teeth), and are dressed to look much older than they really are.

So you're about to be thrust into the world of glitz, glamour, and crying children. How do you feel? Are you horrified at this exploitation of kids, annoyed you have to be here, or excited to see your little girl take down the competition?

HOW TO PLAY

1. There are two ways to play!
   • AND SUDDENLY, CHILD: You and this person have somehow come into possession of a little girl who is to compete in a pageant.
   • AU: This is your actual daughter that the two of you have raised.
2. Comment with your character, putting your character's name, canon, preferences, etc.
3. Comment to others and play out the "parents." Handwaving/NPCing the actual child will probably be best, but if you want to bring a third person in, go for it!
4. If you have a young child character, they may actually be in the pageant.
5. Though girls are more likely to be in pageants, boys can be, too.

PROMPTS

1. I want to be a star: For some reason, the little girl you're taking care of is going to be in a pageant. Are you a willing participant, or do you oppose this?
2. Practice makes perfect: You have to come up with a routine that's sure to wow the judges, and that means time invested.
3. Preparing for the pageant: Dresses, hair, makeup, oh my! It's a painful process, so it might take both of you to get this done. Don't forget your flipper, because snaggle teeth are not a good look, even on a five year old.
4. Beauty: Beauty is the most important part of the pageant, and where the bulk of the score comes from. Go out there, support your kid, and hope they don't fall off the stage!
5. Outfit of choice: This is where their personalities shine through. Any cute costumes go! Just remember that "undead mutant" might not go over well.
6. Talent: The portion where your little princess gets to show off her superpowers and control over the mortal mind. Or her ability to hoola hoop. Either one.
7. Crowning: So, who won? Not everyone gets to take home a crown, and you might have to nurse hurt feelings and tiny bruised egos.
8. After: Build your kid's confidence back up by buying them a pony or taking them to McDonald's.

Comments

emma woodhouse ♕ modern austen

[keenest]

[ worst. pageant mom. ever. ]

James Sterling / Leverage

[sterlingwins]

[ooc: ...He might blackmail the judges.]

This is a *horrible* idea

[oracle_knows]

Barbara looked up with a small smirk. "Daddy? Is putting a lac-lac-something to make you go in the drinking water bad?" From the precocious five year old's expression, butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.

The best kind!

[sterlingwins]

"Only if you get caught, honey," he says with a smile. Because Sterling is really a horrible father, and has always prioritized intelligence, strategy and winning over morals. So, when she decided she wanted to win a beauty pageant, it fast became clear that playing fair wasn't in the cards.

Absolutely!

[oracle_knows]

"Oh." Barbara smiled. She actually wasn't guilty of that. Although the two girls using each others' makeup when they had different skin tones but the same boxes was her doing. "Well. There's half a bottle in Mrs Castello's bag?" She frowned and screwed up her eyes in concentration. "It said ... Ippycake?"

Music Meister | Batman

[hypnotic_patter]

[If his child does not achieve musical perfection there will be no ice cream for a month. At least. Of course winning is never in question, not with Music Meister backing them, but he'd prefer they win by their own virtues.]

6

[usedtobeafish]

[But daddy, she just wants to go swimming! She's standing on the practice stage, staring at him. How do you even say 'perfection'?]

I feel like a horrible person.

[hypnotic_patter]

Come on, Pon-Pon. We need to make this sparkle, if you want to win the competition. Let's hear your scales. [At least her outfit is perfect.]

You shouldn't!

[usedtobeafish]

My scales? But I already did those!

[She bounces around. At least her dress is fluffy! It bounces with her.]

[hypnotic_patter]

Do them again--and stop bouncing! [He runs to hold her in place.] Look classy! I can't have you up on the stage acting like some untrained puppy. You are a professional!

[usedtobeafish]

I am a professional!

[She stops bouncing once he comes over, doing her best to look very serious.]

Papa, if I win, can I get a puppy?

[hypnotic_patter]

A puppy? Running around the theater, chewing everything up? [He looks aghast, then thoughtful.] Perhaps a trained dog. An adult.

Steve Rogers ✯ MCU ✯ Child

[skinnykid]

[ OoC: Also comes in regular-age for pageant dad and female AU for pageant mom. ]

I'm bored, so idek... hi

[bloodbrothers]

You wanted to be an 'army-man' like your friend Bucky, so I got you an army-man uniform. [ His retort is terse as he starts tugging here and there on Steven's uniform to get it to sit properly. ] You can't change your mind now-- we don't have a superhero costume, okay? We didn't pack it, it's probably at home; you can wear it next time-- okay? [ He resists rolling his eyes because it wont do either of them any good, instead plopping the garrison cap onto his head so he could bobby-pin it down. ]

Sherlock Holmes | BBC Sherlock | OTA

[highfunctioning_sociopath]

[OOC: Because I enjoy torturing Sherlock, he's AU, a child and in the pageant. Good luck, parents!]

Itachi Uchiha / Naruto / ota

[itachi_san]

Because throwing a little ninja into a pageant just seems hilariously awesome on so many levels. Wouldn't you agree?