hungry hungry hippos

[spiderhorse]

The FEED ME, SEYMOUR! meme



Man, you're hungry. You can't remember ever being this hungry before. But every time you try to put something in your mouth, it just won't work. Maybe it slides off your tongue before you can bite down. Maybe your spoon seems to come against some invisible force field every time you try to lift it. Maybe there is no spoon! But either way, you literally cannot feed yourself, and you're getting hungrier and hungrier...and all you can think of is, please, won't someone feed me?

Because, you're soon finding out, it seems the only way to get anything in your mouth is by someone else's hand.




001 - Breakfast in Bed - Oh God, I'm so hungry I can't stand. Scream at your roommates, because you just can't get up. Hopefully there's some Egos in the freezer they can make for you while you clutch your pearls and cry in bed about how despicable it is for your roomie to find you in such a state, since you sleep in Spider-Man boxers/the nude/a long white gown like an old lady.

002 - I've fallen and I can't get up! - You couldn't get that sandwich in fast enough, or at all. So weak and dizzy you can't stand, you desperately start crawling towards the kitchen (or the bar where you keep limes, lemons, and your secret fudge cakes) and bemoaning your fate when your best friend/worst enemy happens to drop by. Will they feed you? How good are you at begging, buddy?

003 - The Brew that is True - Man, this sucks. You're stuck with someone you don't really trust, and they're the only one that can get something edible in you. They're suspicious, though, and maybe they've tried to kill you before. You could take what they have to offer, but you're not sure about the way it's fizzing. They wouldn't poison you in your current state, that's foul play and totally undignified! You're not frothing at the mouth now, are you...?

004 - The least romantic dinner in the world - You've looked forward to going out to this very busy restaurant/cafe/diner for so long now and you feel like you'll slump over the table while your stomach rumbles out a heavy metal beat. Your beloved has to decide if they're too embarrassed to feed you in public or if you're really worth feeding like a baby while people stare. Hope it's not the first date!

005 - Oh my God, I fucking hate you - Your companion is kind of a joker, but you never thought they'd take it this far. Oh yeah, they're going to feed you, hooray! But who the hell eats a sandwich with cherries, spinach, half a container of mustard, two dill pickles, all covered in paprika and oregano? That's is so gross, dude, I'm going to kick your ass when this is over with.

006 - Blackmail - Oho, how the great have fallen! You'll be fed, but there will be pictures taken for later purposes. You want to have a great presidential/prime minister/tzar/grand poobah campaign? Ha-ha-ha, that's funny. Here, drink from this baby bottle while I film it, you'll never see that career you wanted. All is lost, buddy, unless you want to starve to death. Ha-ha-ha.

007 - Obligatory Sex Option - The person you've been eying for so long, dreaming about, and yet never quite able to reach is at your mercy. You'll save them from a miserable death...if they give you something to take away from it when it's all been said and done. Or maybe you'll feed them bit by bit juuust enough to keep their stamina going without being able to get completely free. No one ever said you had morals, after all.

008 - DO MY BIDDING - For some reason, you're under the impression that everyone is obligated to serve you. Not just because you're hungry, but because you're also the most awesome thing that ever awesome'd all over the place of awesome. With your attitude, though, how far can you get with them? Don't catch the vapors now, Malfoy, or Hagrid will force feed you his rock cakes.

009 - Wildcard - Do whatever the fuck you want, man, it's all about having fun.

Comments

Morrigan Aensland || Darkstalkers/Vampire || Open to All

[aensland]

2

[remy_le_beau]

[It wasn't like Remy to watch a women in need but at the same time it was rather awkward to see such a women who was crawling across the kitchen to the fridge.]

Ya'll need some help down dere mon cher?

Knockout | Transformers Prime | OTA

[sweet_riiiiims]

Booga | Tank Girl

[madcapmarsupial]

[Gonna opt out of seven.]

Eliot Spencer | Leverage | Het for ships

[retrieverchef]

Lindsey McDonald | Angel | Het for ships

[hart_or_hand]

9-- Let's make our own rules!

[didnotwant]

Marion really needs to eat. She had shifted back not long ago after dealing with a problem while in her wolf form but there are problems. Problems that cause her to retreat back into the bed just under the sheet and she huffs.

"I'm not coming out," she calls at the door. Yup she's not going to ask for help because this is just stupid. Her hands hurt too much for her to get dressed properly. She isn't in the mood to ask for help... and is taking over Lindsey's bed until she feels better.

Because the sore werewolf makes her own rules when cranky.

Cerni Odair | Hunger Games semi-OC | no smut

[knotsnarrows]

Kevin Prentiss | Weather Warden | Het for ships

[fire_punk]

Odd Della Robbia | Code Lyoko | OTA | Aged up for ships if need be

[aimless_arrow]

Hibiki | Pokemon HGSS | ota

[goldendays]

Shindou Takuto | Inazuma Eleven GO! | ota

[presto_turn]

[Obligatory "no 007."

The option, that is. If you want your James Bond to feed Shindou, I...guess I am okay with it...?]

Edgar Roni Figaro | Final Fantasy VI | No smut

[edgar_roni]

Jonathan Morris | Castlevania | OTA

[okei]

Rick Bradbury | Ex Machina

[waiting]

[ he's been a sidekick, a chauffeur, and a bodyguard. personal feeder is relatively low-key by comparison (unless you'd rather feed him, anyway. ]

Yako Katsuragi | Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro

[topslug]

Sif / Marvel Cinematic Universe

[atwar]

[ also available in multiple au varieties ]

Tony Stark | MCU | OTA

[arcofiron]

Thor Odinson | MCU | OTA

[odinsonthor]

2

[doctor_stephen_strange]

[Seeing trouble within a magical realm Strange teleported right away to the location in such need. Only to appear within an asgaurden kitchen with a Thor crawling to the cupboards]

Are you going to make a habit of such antics son of Odin! You hold a lot of power this seemed important!

[He glared down not the slightest bit amused after how much he has helped Thor in the past just to be repaid like this]

Bellatrix Black | Harry Potter

[trixortreats]

Ruby ☾ Once Upon a Time

[scarletcloaked]

(also comes in fairytale flavor)

Ise Nanao | Bleach

[eighthlibrarian]

Manfred von Karma | Ace Attorney | OTA

[makethemguilty]

[This was the last straw. On top of dealing with incompetence on a daily basis, Manfred von Karma was having to deal with something...rather unusual. And infuriating. His appetite was nearly maddening him and yet...For some cruel twist of fate he was not permitted to sate it!

"Confound it!" He bellowed, and tossed a fork across the room, very likely hitting someone if they were nearby.

His hand shook and trembled and he bloody well could NOT lift it to his lips. Whatever compulsion or force stayed his hand would find he did not bend so easily as that flimsy rubbish they called a utensil.]

"If this is another trick I will see to it that those responsible will be punished!"

Misfire // Transformers: More Than Meets the Eye

[wiredfriendlyfire]

[May or may not bite the hand that feeds him for the lulz/out of spite.]

shouichi irie • katekyo hitman REBORN!

[binaries]

all of them

[chemistries]

Hey, Bambi. [Shouichi might have been asleep, but he probably won't be any more, given the way Kon has sat on him, nudging him with a heel and balancing a tray in his good hand over his head.] I went and picked you some clover.

Glitch ± Tin Man

[aintnoconvict]

[ headcase clumsiness: engage. ]

Kain Highwind | Final Fantasy IV/Dissidia 012

[dragoon_pride]

[prefer no 7]