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Classified Ads Meme

classified ads meme

A classified ad is an ad designed to either sell a certain thing, or to find
someone who is willing to sell a thing that you wish to buy.

How this works.

○Post with your character. Instead of putting in their name and canon in
the subject line, you are going to put their ad.

For instance, if they are SELLING something the subject line would
look something like this:

FOR SALE: 1 XBOX, USED BUT IN GOOD CONDITION

If you are looking for something it might look like this:

WANTED: XBOX AS LONG AS IT WORKS.

You can further elaborate in the body of your comment about it if
you want, just remember classified ads are usually short and to the
point. It will also be assumed that your character has their phone
number and email along with their ad for others to contact them.

○Look around. See someone advertising something your character
would be interested in, or looking for something your character
might have? Tag them!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

Comes standard with rocket launcher, energy canon and beam katana
Has only seen light use

What's the power source?

Well trained, sixteen years experience in the industry. Willing to relocate for right employer.

Small extra fee for high altitude work.

~~Absolutely loyal to your agenda and not our own. Money back guarantee if you are found in a dumpster with your face broken off.~~

Edited 2012-09-09 21:33 (UTC)

Define high altitude.

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Reasonable rates for removal of ghosts, demons, and other supernatural infestations.

[A tall female with a leather jacket comes in.]

I came for the ad?

Edited 2012-09-09 23:10 (UTC)

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Re: FOR HIRE: EXORCISM SERVICES

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Slight knife marks on the box, but still in good condition.

What's with the knife marks?

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omg, that icon, haha. Scary!

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XD

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We've made such a lovely, angsty thread out of a silly meme. xD

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[Have one upset teenage girl if you decide to answer the ad. She's attached to the thing, which is a reason why it's only for rent.]

How do you weaponize an umbrella?

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Are you a super person with an engaging personality?
Would you like to help people and earn money at the same time?
HeroTV could be the job of your dreams!
We are currently holding open auditions for our new season of the smash hit reality program.

Edited 2012-09-09 22:59 (UTC)

Are resumes required? Much of my work is, unfortunately, confidential due to being a matter of national security.

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Services needed for proof of parentage. Payment will come after proof.

Must be willing to follow sung commands that are hypnotizing.

~~Not responsible for death, injury, or various other mishaps on the job.~~

[Well at least she's asking.]

[Oh what is this. Music Meister smells copyright infringement.]

If you can hypnotize, why do you need to hire? A minion willing to follow without persuasion is far more professional, and valuable.

tee hee XD

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Condition: Slightly used.
Exterior: Minor wear and tear.
Interior: Major defects.
Warnings: Resentful, despises people, enjoys solving murders and attracting danger.

[Mycroft is quite amused at the moment.]

Is he house trained?

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Comes complete with charger. Comes with Linux already installed.

[Take that, Hardison.]

What specifically is a kitchen laser set? And how big of a kitchen does it require?

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[ Sorry Dante this is what you get for leaving your shit at his place one time too many. ]

How cheap is really cheap?

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I'm sorry. By which I mean not really.

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ahahaha XD

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Insert Trollface here

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dante you deserve a medal

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Re: dante you deserve a medal

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maximumbet - 2012-09-10 03:28 (UTC) - Expand

I love playing this guy. XD

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Dante IS the most fabulous

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F Lv.500 Final Boss seeks M/F Lv.250-400 Hero for gloating, annihilation.
Must be willing to travel up 665 floors.
NO POWER LEVELLERS.

Um... Can we elaborate a little on the 'annihilation'?

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Recently launched, currently in orbit, barely used, comes complete with software for hijacking worldwide communications.

[Have a wanna-be villain looking at you, Music Meister.]

Is it legitimate, my good man. Or are you just trying to con me?

[A man with such swag, couldn't be that way.]

yeeeeee

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they can give each other tacky/awesome fashion tips. XD

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Any face will do. Fee is negotiable.

[ TIME AND DATE GIVEN. ALL OLD EVIL GEAR MUST GO TO MAKE WAY FOR NEWER, MORE AWESOME HEROIC GEAR! ]

[ Looking around and kind of humming and mumbling to herself before finally acknowledging that the blue dude having the yard sale actually exists . ]

Can you give me a lot price on ALL of it?

[ She has a lot of projects going on and evil gear or no spare parts are spare parts. ]

Minus the evil capes.

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Re: EVIL LAIR YARD SALE

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Comes with chain-smoking habit and an issue with personal space.

~~Selling price:~~ Free! Actually, I'll even pay you to haul him away.

Edited 2012-09-09 23:51 (UTC)

Is he cute?

[ Cue a quaint but brief run-down of his general selling points and contact information. Included as an addendum, in bold italics, are the words below. ]

Nefarious underworld mafia-types need not inquire.

Edited 2012-09-09 23:59 (UTC)

[In comes a tall, pretty blonde with legs up to here.]

Do you do fashion photography?

Edited 2012-09-10 00:01 (UTC)

Subject to various magical spells and various other tests.

~~[May be of dubious safety and legality.]~~

Is Purchase Of The Entire Set Required

Right hand only.

Why just the right?

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dying over here.

fuckingvisions - 2012-09-10 16:43 (UTC) - Expand

died as soon as I tagged it...

hart_or_hand - 2012-09-10 16:47 (UTC) - Expand

Thank you man, Thank you!

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You're welcome, man. I just couldn't resist...

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Its a thing of beauty.

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Do you want to wield amazing magical powers and wear a cool costume?
Would you like to protect your city from the growing witch threat?
Then form a contract with me!
As a sign on bonus any one wish will be granted for you! No matter how impossible.

Edited 2012-09-10 02:13 (UTC)

hey
im so incredibly interested
i mean im all about costumes man
capes are the shit
but i hear you only take girls

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May or may not include small power-source.

Well look who it is!

I'd be happy to take that off your servos if you don't mind~

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HOPE YOU DON'T MIND AUS

stasisagent - 2012-09-10 08:51 (UTC) - Expand

Must have an appropriate name.
eg April, May, June, Julius, Augustus, etc etc

Looking for workable Adamantium in liquid form preferably. Will also accept Vibranium, Orihalcon or other substitutes as long as in a workable state.

Willing to buy in bulk.

Contact with prices.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

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