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hufflefluffhouse) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
bakerstreet2017-06-20 01:51 pm
hufflefluffhouse) wrote in bakerstreet2017-06-20 01:51 pm
Entry tags:
Little steps
 No matter how much they care for the other person and want to be with them, some people simply can't dive head first into relationships. Little things that form intimacy and romance, little acts we take for granted - being close, holding hands, kissing, showing affection in public - they won't or can't do...at least not right off the bat. Something in their past, their experiences, their trauma, or even their personality holds them back. For both them and the person they're "dating," as it were, this can lead to a frustrating experience. Still, steps can be taken towards letting the walls fall down. Little, tiny steps, but those can mean the world all the same. The People One With the help of a partner, one person warms up. Two Both sides of this couple are learning how to be in a relationship and to be open. The Actions Talking → A relationship can't exist if there's not some communication, so either learn to use your words or become so close you can speak without them. Spending Time → Even such mundane occurrences as watching TV or cooking together is new ground. Touching → You might just find you enjoy reaching out and touching them. Kissing → Another kind of touch, when you think about it. Cuddling → ...at least they're warm and, hopefully, soft. Sleeping → You're at your absolute weakest when you're asleep. It shows trust to doze off around this person. Public Display → It's one thing to be in love in private, but showing you care in public is a different story. Kind Words → Three little words (more or less) are all it takes. Why, then, are they so hard to get out? Sex The ultimate stumbling block to some. To be laid blissfully bare is to truly let your guard down. |
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[At least he's a part of the way there. More so is that their relationship - as mentioned - isn't a secret. Not that he would entirely mind; they have a great deal of support from both their loved ones and the public, alike. At the same time they also have Hasetsu, and soon, him moving to Russia. Yuuri already knows that Viktor— no, now their - apartment where they can hide away in a world of their own. Yuuri already is immensely grateful for that.
He only blushes further with both Viktor's words and the gentle kisses; the sight and feel of his ring only continues to amaze him. Although at the same time he's still kind of embarrassed about that video.]
The fact that it was recorded to begin with. . . [His eyes slightly widen] A-Ah, not that I would change anything if I could go back on it-! I do wish I had remembered that night, though.
[For as embarrassing as it also sounded like. Damn. His expression softens again, almost sheepish in a small way.]
I still had admired you so for so long. I still do. For you to have chosen me out of anyone at all. . .
[Yes, he still does think about that even though he knows and recognizes what Viktor says in turn. He leans against him in turn, this time being the one to lift their joined hands. Pressing a kiss to the back of Viktor's, they then go to rest over his heart.]
I don't want you ever to look away.
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It's alright that you don't remember it. We can have plenty more nights that you will remember.
[Gesturing around them briefly with the hand connected to the arm around Yuuri, Viktor punctuates his words with another kiss to Yuuri's hair. He could never get tired of kissing or touching it, and he wants to take every opportunity he can to do so.]
Tonight is a night you can remember. The sunset and the sounds of the train and the two of us sitting together like this? This is a night you can come back to. And besides, I remember that night well enough for the both of us.
[Because how could Viktor possibly forget the adorable drunk Japanese boy that he spent such a lighthearted time dancing with? It would be impossible for him to forget his awkward, slightly slurred flirting if he tried.
At Yuuri's next statements, however, Viktor becomes more serious, his expression more intense as he clenches more desperately at that hand, swears he feels Yuuri's heartbeat against his hand, though he knows it's likely his imagination, which Yuuri's clothing in the way.]
Yuuri...
[He shifts himself so he can look Yuuri in the eye, though he does not allow his hand to fall away from Yuuri's chest where it is clasped with the other man's; it feels far too nice.]
I don't even think I can call it a choice. I've never...
[Despite how well Viktor conveys his thoughts and desires through action, he is not equally gifted with words, and he stops for a moment, brow furrowing slightly as he struggles to find the right way to convey what he wants to say. More often than not, Viktor becomes frustrated when trying to convey something serious, and says the absolute wrong thing instead. This time, he doesn't want that to be what happens. Taking his time, he really tries his hardest.]
I am going to be completely honest with you. I've never wanted anyone else. Not in this way. Not to keep in my life like this. But from that first night, I saw something in you that made me realize what I was missing. From then until I saw your video I was restless, and when I saw it I took the quickest opportunity to come to you. You have given me something I've never even dreamed of having, and I was fine on my own until I met you. Something changed on that night, even if you don't remember it, and I could never be content without you by my side again.
[And then Viktor swallows, and glances away, his cheeks flushing as he laughs disarmingly and shifts to run a hand through his own hair before he lets it rest back on Yuuri's shoulder.]
I'm not very good with words, sorry, sorry. But you know...
I hope...
[Without warning he's lunging in to rest his forehead against Yuuri's, his eyes open wide so he can search Yuuri's darker ones for any sort of confirmation that his words made sense.]
That some of what I said makes you understand. That to be chosen by you was something far bigger than I can ever explain to you.
That I won't ever look away.
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[That's probably the one thing he especially wishes he could recall. Even if his heart warms when knowing - when being told - having a solid memory is something else. It isn't anything he can dwell on, though. There are countless more to make within their entire lives together.
He continues to listen to what Viktor is saying, to all of what he's implying, and the depths of just how much he loves. There still are times where Yuuri equally is terrible with forming the right and most fitting words. Just like how at times there's a part of his mind which still questions everything. Viktor is really here. With him. With Yuuri Katsuki who has always seen himself as just another average person, harboring little to no extravagant or stand out traits. And he knows very well, too, how Viktor would immediately shoot that down. Which is why Yuuri never bothers to even comment on it— granted, he has increasingly found himself able to genuinely believe them for himself. His confidence has steadily grown ever since Viktor showed up in his life. Yes, he'll always carry a fair amount of demons, but with Viktor, it no longer is as difficult or even debilitating as they once were.
He's briefly taken aback when they're suddenly far closer. So close that he can perfectly see the way Viktor is actually blushing, himself, and he can't help but think of how very cute and endearing that sight is. Of how he's responsible for it. The added point of contact only leaves Yuuri's heart to beat a little harder beneath their joined hands.
There's no stopping the way tears have begun to well up little by little. His smile is still in place and watery, but it fully reaches his eyes, now shining . It's not that he wants or meant to cry, but there's no helping it with all of what Viktor has just said. Nor with everything else he physically expresses.]
Are we practicing our vows, now?
[Yuuri plays, knowing that he honestly doesn't need to speak as many words. He leans in closer, nuzzling lightly against Viktor and giving their hands another squeeze. This time it's Yuuri who steals a kiss, but it lingers further, so warm and sweet, than the ones before.]
I think I know what love really is, now. Because of you.
[There's no one word to describe how he feels, but "love" has become all the more fitting.]
Sorry for being slow as always <3
[He almost suggests dancing right here, but he doesn't want to kill the moment, and so he holds back, clasps Yuuri's hand a little tighter in his, his own heart beating that must faster for the words Yuuri speaks, for that soft and teary smile that crosses his face and into his eyes and makes them sparkle. Viktor loves the sight, loves sitting here with Yuuri, loves Yuuri more than words can really express. At least accurately.
To Viktor, Yuuri is absolutely everything he could have ever wanted. From the first night at the banquet, he knew he was special, and since that day he has steadily learned more and more about him, and in the process has discovered how truly outstanding he is. It's incredible to Viktor, someone who has never been able to make true and genuine connections in his life because of his desire to soldier forward on his own, that a person as soft and genuine and perfect as Yuuri could possibly have returned this feeling when he was finally lucky enough to experience it. It's almost too good to be real, certainly too good for him to be able to express accurately, and he only hopes his words have done at least a bit to give Yuuri some idea of how deeply he wants and needs this.
Viktor's own eyes are still wet, and that same wetness in Yuuri's eyes makes him have to hold back tears in earnest. Viktor Nikiforov is no someone who cries often, and certainly not in front of people, but in this moment with Yuuri he feels so warm and open and vulnerable that he feels like it might not be such a bad thing.]
Practicing our vows? Maybe. But I can promise you that you won't be hearing them before the wedding. They'll be a surprise.
[He winks, trying to calm himself a bit, because he's still teary. He chuckles, kisses Yuuri back as he hums happily into his mouth. But when Yuuri adds that last bit, that progress is lost. "I think I know what love really is, now. Because of you.". Viktor can't help it; a tear escapes, and he makes a tiny gasping noise, not feeling like himself because he's not used to this level of emotional honesty. It's heavy, but not in a bad way.]
Yuuri...
[He could say so many things right now. Tell Yuuri that he feels the exact same way, that he's learned it from him as well. Tell him all about how he's given him his two most important L's and how he'd never truly understood love until Yuuri came into his life. But he's too choked up, and he can't really form words anymore, and right now his hands are shaking and he just kisses him again, deeper this time. Probably too deep for being in public, but he doesn't care. He's shaken and needy and he's never felt quite this level of overwhelming closeness before. He doesn't even know what to do.]
I love you...
[He breaks the kiss just long enough to say it, enough emotion in his voice that it's almost embarrassing, and he nuzzles Yuuri back and kisses him again, squeezing Yuuri's hand a bit tighter. This is so overwhelming, but in the best way possible.]
♥♥♥
He may still be a god, but all gods will have their flaws. Each and every one of them being a part of who Yuuri loves in all possible ways. He never could have imagined that he would have reached a point like this in his life. Especially with someone he had watched from afar for so long.]
A practice run, then. I expect the very best from you, you know.
[He smiles a little more with the remark. Clearly he both means it, but is teasing all the same. He knows that whatever Viktor will say will be perfect.
Yuuri's eyes widen when he sees the way his fiancé's eyes have teared up as well, as if in a mirror image to his own. It's so very different from the moment back at the Barcelona hotel, yet it shakes his heart all the same. There's nothing at all wrong about it, he knows where those tears are based from, but there's no way it leaves Yuuri unaffected.]
Viktor. . .
[His fingertips ever so lightly touch upon the other's cheek. Viktor is beautiful like this, in a way, his emotions laid bare, similar to Yuuri's own.
Before he can say much else, though, he melts into the kiss, instead. It probably is too much for being out in public, and on any other occasion Yuuri would draw back more - for one, not wanting to cause a scene; it's particularly conservative, here, where such public displays are frowned upon - but at the moment he can't find it in him to care. Granted, there hardly are anymore people on the train, now.
Still, the kiss is slow and warm, leaving Yuuri to further relax into it. Very admittedly does he want to get back home, already, so they could continue where no one could see.]