bakerstreet | Rain Meme

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[meme] gen

Rain Meme

Caught in the rain

It started out quietly, and then, quite suddenly, you're caught in a storm. Time to find cover. Nothing much to do but to wait it out.

Scenarios listed below for those who want 'em.

i WHERE:
001 PLAYGROUND - Well, you can try to hide under the slide or maybe in the jungle gym... at least you're some place fun?
002 PARK - Always happens, caught outside trying to take advantage of the weather... and it ends up pulling a fast one on you.
003 STORE FRONT - Better hope they have an awning you can take advantage of.
004 THE BEACH - Not exactly the best place to be during a rainstorm, however it is possible to get caught in a sudden storm.
005 WILD CARD - Anyway you want it.

ii HOW:
001 TREE - Not the best cover, but it'll have to do, stay close to the roots and you won't get too wet.
002 UMBRELLA - Most conventional... Kinda boring. But it works.
003 NEWSPAPER - Not permanent, but it'll have to do. Good luck.
004 BAG - Well... y'gotta do what you gotta do.
005 NONE - You know what. You're a rebel. You don't need cover. Screw convention.
006 WILD CARD - that's the way you need it.

iii WHY:
001 REJECTED - Welp. Rejection sucks. And no one will see you crying in the rain.
002 WAITING - For the bus? For someone else? For some revelation? What are you waiting for.
003 MELANCHOLY - Sometimes the best place to feel a bit down is out in the rain.
004 HAPPINESS - Is everything going your way? Are you singing a refrain while walking down the lane? Just singing. Singin' in the rain.
005 ANGER - WELL YOU KNOW WHAT. SCREW YOU TOO, RAIN.
006 WILD CARD - Anyway you want it.

>> POST with your character
>> TAG others, use RNG if you need to, or just make up your own scenario if you want!
>> HAVE FUN.

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Cassian wanted to believe that it was real - what they'd felt, that it wasn't simply a result of the doomed circumstances that they'd found themselves. He was also beginning to think that maybe the best way of figuring things out would have been to talk about them right from the start, rather than compartmentalizing them along with everything else he had to put away in order to fulfill his orders. People called him cold, fearless, said that he had nerves of steel. The truth was that he felt everything deeply ... until he had to put it all away in order to get his job done.

For once, he'd love to throw all caution to the wind and just ... give in.

Suddenly, the rain began pounding all the harder, and he thought that maybe it echoed the beating of his heart. "Five minutes, and then we'll talk."

It was a promise.

People have called her that too - cold, unfeeling, sometimes reckless. It used to make her happy when she overheard people saying those things about her. She was tough. She wanted to be tough. But now? She wanted to be held and comforted. It was so tiring having to appear cold and steely all the time. Why deny the person she was? Because it could've gotten her killed in the past - but now? She found a relatively safe place. She should allow herself to be herself.

"I'll be here," she replied, hearing the promise in his voice and feeling hopeful again. She wouldn't scold herself for feeling hope - she had been so hard on herself already, it was time for her to not be so.

Reckless. Cassian never used to be called reckless. But recently, he'd begun to take the sort of chances that could indeed be called reckless and dangerous. He didn't want to think about the reasons why, so those got compartmentalized so far down that he might not ever find them again. He was so tired of being stoic and strong and aloof. Sometimes, he just wanted to indulge in the comfort he'd learned to crave from the simple intimacy of the touch of Jyn's hand. He missed that, too.

He didn't answer, concentrating instead on getting there, his strides long and purposeful. There weren't crowds of people in the way, but those that came across him recognized his expression, and let the man pass without any interruption. He was on a mission.

Although, when he rounded a corner and saw Jyn, sitting on that durasteel crate, he slowed, just watching her for a long moment before he had to pull himself together in order to even just make his approach.

"Jyn - ?"

Her heart was beating so hard in her chest from the anticipation - it felt like it might even explode if she held her breath. Why was she nervous? She shouldn't be nervous. This was Cassian Andor, after all. She'd seen him be angry and terrified - she'd seen him fall a good twenty to thirty feet and land on a platform below, unmoving. She'd seen how vulnerable he could be - how starved for honest human interaction he was because she was starved for it too.

When she heard her name, she took in a breath and turned to look over her shoulder at the speaker - at Cassian. "Hey." She got up from the crate and stood there awkwardly, crossing her arms over her stomach.

Perhaps it would set her at ease to know that he felt exactly the same. Perhaps it would amuse her. He'd accept either. He'd seen Jyn face death, destruction, loss, and a nightmare that had followed her ever since she was a child, and all without batting an eye. He'd seen nothing more than her convictions and the strength of her beliefs convince men more jaded than he was to follow her into certain death.

She'd been the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen when he opened his eyes after sessions in the bacta tank and surgeries alike and found her with him, watching over him like some sort of ... guardian angel, if he believed in such things.

He'd never seen her quite so awkward and unsure of herself - unsure of how to behave with him. The thought sent a pang of guilt rocketing through his body, rooting him to the spot. "Should we - I mean ... find someplace a little more ... private?"

It had been so easy when they were each recovering from the injuries they had sustained on Scarif. It was like they had been in a cocoon those short few weeks - the only thing that had mattered to either of them was that they each got better and stronger. But when Cassian got better - well enough to start working again - it changed. Jyn liked to think she was good with change - could handle it - but they grew apart - distant. It was partly her fault - she wanted to give him space - but why had he so readily accepted it? Why hadn't he fought?

"Wherever you'd like," she offered. He knew the base better than she did. She'd follow his lead.

It had been easy to focus on recovery - and on each other. It had been easy to ignore the world at large in favor of just the pair of them alone ... and, of course, the doctors and med droids who interrupted from time to time. And then they were both cleared to return to duty and instead of ... furthering the relationship that had begun to grow and blossom, Cassian ... pulled back into himself. And he could rationalize it until he was blue in the face, but the truth of the matter was that it was because he was scared.

The fearless Cassian Andor was terrified.

And he'd done the wrong thing completely by assuming that ignoring it was going to make it all go away. All it had done was make everything worse. Maybe she'd hear him out, though, maybe she wouldn't hate him like he deserved to be hated. Maybe ... it wasn't too late to make things right.

"I'm not too keen on anyone hearing what I need to say, Jyn", he started, less confidently than he would have liked. "Your quarters, mine, anywhere that we can be alone."

She half shrugged. "Yours, then, I suppose." Jyn back to her defiant self.

She wouldn't usually give this kind of attitude to Cassian, but somehow she felt it was warranted. She didn't need anyone - but she still felt abandoned by him - thrown away to the side like some forgotten trinket. In fact, she was sort of angry - not just at him, but herself as well. He didn't fight the separation, but maybe she should've been the one to. It didn't matter now, though. Did any of this?

...yes. It did. It still mattered to her. They had lost time when she made a promise to herself that she wouldn't waste any of it anymore - not now when she had been given a second chance.

... Cassian deserved it.

Actually, he deserved so much worse for leaving Jyn to fend for herself in a place where there were still some who doubted her. He deserved much worse for abandoning her without the benefit of an explanation. No mater how good his intentions had been - or how good he'd thought they were, he'd still made a mistake that he might never be able to atone for. Just another regret. Another ghost to haunt him when he was alone with his thoughts.

He nodded curtly, and although it was difficult to take that first step away when they were as close as they'd been in far too long, eventually managed, walking tall and as ramrod straight as he could manage now that his back wasn't what it used to be, leading the way like a good soldier.

Once they were alone, he could drop the facade and just ...

Be honest with her.

Jyn followed him quietly, watching his back. He'd been in such bad shape when they came back to Yavin. He hit his back on a hard beam after all, and then fell twenty to thirty feet. Jyn thought he had died - she could still remember that feeling in her heart when she saw him still, on the platform below her. She almost went back for him but she didn't - she knew Cassian would've wanted her to continue without him at all costs and so she did and then he returned - saved her from Krennic - and then they were on the beach waiting for death in each other's arms.

Did that mean nothing to him? Why had he so easily abandoned her once he was healed? Even though they've only known each other for a short time - it felt like ages. They'd been through so much together - experienced so much together.

So maybe Jyn was a bit bitter about it, but she didn't know how to feel right now - right at that moment as she followed him. All she wanted was to reach out and take his hand.

Three surgeries later, what the bacta tanks couldn't heal were fused together with durasteel pins and plates. He'd never be without pain, but he could almost do everything he'd been able to before. It had taken a lot of intense physical therapy, a lot of tough days and doubt, but this was far better than the alternative.

Every step had been torture as he climbed his way out of Hell to Jyn. But he knew that he'd do it all over again if she were ever in danger. He'd do it all a thousand times over if she needed him to.

Maybe he hadn't shown it, but he felt it - from their first meeting, he'd known that they'd be inextricably linked for as long as they lived. And they'd been given more time, which is all he'd wanted when they were holding each other tight, waiting for the blast from the Death Star to reach them, and he'd ... squandered it.

He didn't want to squander it anymore. Didn't want to waste any more of it when they could be together.

Cassian was silent as he led Jyn through the maze of tunnels until they reached his quarters. Quick to key in the door code, he waited until it slid open, and gestured her inside first. Deep breath. This probably wasn't going to be easy, but it was necessary.

She'd only been to Cassian's quarters once or twice in the past - when he had been forced to stay in the medbay until he got better. She'd gone to his quarters to get items for him like clothes or his datapad. But she'd never been alone with him before in his quarters - this would be the first time - and it made her nervous. Not that she was afraid of him or anything - she was afraid of what she might do.

Jyn crossed her arms over her chest as she entered and then stood off to the side by the main door. She took a look around. It was a little more lived-in than the last time she was here. She turned to Cassian and waited.

His quarters were still as bereft of anything resembling personal items, but they did look a little more lived in now that he was actually ... living in them more often than usual while he waited to resume his normal duties. Cassian only wished that Jyn was spending time with him here under better circumstances.

He slumped against the door, the cold seeping through his layers until he shivered from the icy fingers grasping at him. Jyn watched him carefully, and Cassian had never felt as young or as unsure as he did under her scrutinizing gaze. He cleared his throat, and paused, and then began.

"Jyn, I - you don't owe me anything, I know, so I'm grateful that you've agreed to hear me out. I, uh, I realize that I've made a huge mistake, and if you never forgive me for it, I'll understand. But I also hope that you can understand that what I did - I thought was for the best."

She listened and then took a long moment to gather her thoughts, letting silence fall between them.

"You're asking me to forgive you for something you didn't even ask my opinion on," she said slowly, arms crossed firmly over her chest. "And that's beside the fact that you don't know what's best for me. The only person that does is me." She hated how her eyes watered as she spoke. She hated looking and feeling weak in front of him. She hated that he put her in this position and that she let him do it.

The silence settled over Cassian like a fog - heavy, cold, and he couldn't help but fear the unknown as he waited for Jyn to respond, to say anything at all, even if it was that she hated him for what he'd done. At least he'd know, and that had to be better than living in limbo.

"You're right", he started, nodding slightly, frowning as he watched her expression change and falter, the way her eyes filled with tears, and all he wanted to was go to her, to breach the distance between them, to hold her close, to apologize profusely and beg for forgiveness, and promise that he'd never do it again if she just gave him this chance to make up what he'd done, and -

He didn't. Too afraid to move and shatter the brittle truce between them, and Cassian Andor wasn't in the habit of being a coward, but that was how he felt as he stared at Jyn and felt his heart shatter in his chest. He'd done this. He'd driven this wedge between them. He'd been the cause, and if he couldn't fix what he'd broken, it would be his fault completely.

"You're right. I thought I knew better, and I was wrong. I'm not accustomed to ... being wrong, or apologizing, or admitting that I'm not always as in control as I'd like to be. I'm not accustomed to admitting to ... what I want. But I wanted to let you know that even though we've been apart, the only thing I've been able to think about is you. And you're the only thing that makes any sense in my life now, and I know, now, that what I thought I felt wasn't just a response to the circumstance, that - that it was ... that it is real, and I know that I don't deserve it after the way that I've treated you, but - "

He paused, needing to take a breath, try to find words that he knew were never going to be adequate enough to express the torrent of emotions overwhelming him at every turn.

"I don't deserve anything from you, Jyn, but if you still feel anything for me like what I feel for you, I hope we can - I hope you'll let me prove that I'm serious when I say that I'll never leave you again, that when I tell you that I'm with you all the way that I mean it with everything that I am, and everything that I will ever be."

Pause. Breath.

"I don't expect you to give me an answer now. Just - just tell me that you'll think about it. I'll wait for however long it takes, Jyn, I mean that."

He and Jyn shared many similarities - what he said about not being accustomed to being wrong, or apologizing, or not always being in control rang true for her. They were both stubborn and headstrong. Two qualities that aren't always looked upon as being good qualities but for some reason both of them together worked. It hadn't been working for a while, but it had worked before.

"I know how I feel - I still feel the same about you," she said softly, looking away because it hurt to think that for a while she thought that he didn't feel the same way anymore.

Those weren't exactly the most positive qualities, but despite an inauspicious beginning, the pair of them had quickly learned how to work well together. They ... fit. And he'd almost thrown it all away because of what - because he was scared?

He'd spend the rest of his life making it up to Jyn if she allowed him to.

The admittance that she still felt the same was like a punch in the gut. Breathless, he stared at her, shocked, surprised, tentatively ... pleased. "Is it enough? Is it enough to warrant giving me another chance, Jyn?"

"Yes," she whispered because she knew if she said it any louder, she'd sob. Slowly, she looked up at him and saw the expression on his face - it made her want to close the space between them quickly and wrap her arms around him, burying her face against his shoulder. She had felt so alone here on the base without him - and there was a small part of her that thought he might do this again - abandon her like so many people had already done in her life. But she wanted to take that chance - he might abandon her again, but at least they shared a few good moments together.

Jyn spoke so softly that Cassian almost thought that he imagined it. At the very least, he wasn't expecting yes more than he'd been expecting are you crazy or go fuck yourself, or worse, and for a moment, a long moment, he thought he'd never breathe again. And then his heart kicked back into life, and he pushed away from the door, desperate to be close again after so much self-imposed time apart. In a matter of steps, he breached the distance that laid between them, stopping short of simply wrapping her in his arms and holding her tight.

He swallowed hard, and extended a hand, and waited for her to either take it or deny it. "I'm not going anywhere, Jyn", he promised, his voice soft, his expression even more so, only for her. "Never again, I swear it."

When he walked over - closing the space between them - she held her breath - both afraid and excited at the same time. She was getting what she wanted, but she was so afraid that it was going to fail again. But she knew she had to take that chance.

She looked up at him and then at his hand. "You know you can't promise that, Cassian." His name sounded so good to say aloud - she hadn't said it in so long. But that was beside the point - he couldn't promise that he would stay. He worked for the Alliance, after all, and in a position that put him at great risk. No - he couldn't promise that he would never abandon her again.

Cassian would do anything in his power to make sure that he didn't fail again. Jyn didn't have to take another chance on him, but she was willing to, after the distance he'd put between them, and he wasn't going to jeopardize it in any way, shape, or form.

... But he knew that she was right. Once he was cleared for duty, he'd be off-base often, and away from Jyn entirely. And there was no guarantee that he'd always return. It was a fool's folly, making her a promise that he couldn't know that he'd be able to keep. "I know", he muttered, flexing his fingers, waiting, hoping that she'd take his hand so that he could feel the warmth of her once again. "When I said that I was with you all the way, Jyn, I meant it. And I mean it now, too, no matter what happens. It's you for me, and only you, for as long as we have."

She looked up at him still unsure, but she finally took his hand in hers. It was such a simple pleasure - touching someone's hand - but it comforted Jyn immensely - to be able to feel the warmth that was radiating from him. She knew, then, that the only one for her with Cassian. "I'm still mad at you, though," she said, a hint of a smile on her face.

Cassian curls his fingers around Jyn's, holding as tightly as he dared. It had been too long since the last time they'd been so close, maintained contact like this, and he held on like he was a drowning man and she was his only salvation. And as he inhaled sharply, he couldn't help the tiniest smile lifting his lips in response. "I hardly assumed otherwise."

She held his hand a moment longer before letting go - immediately missing that small amount of physical contact. She looked away and then down at her boots before looking up at him again. "So what now?" She asked. Jyn never had this sort of...relationship with anyone before. She's not quite sure what to do with herself now.

He wished he had the answers. But, like Jyn, he'd never really found himself involved in actual relationships before. Sure, there had been those who were interested in him, and those he'd been interested in, but nothing had ever really come of that interest. And the only times he'd been with anyone physically were in the course of missions. But an actual relationship was beyond him. They'd just have to learn together. "I ... don't really know how any of this is supposed to work", he admitted, his voice tinged with embarrassment. "I know that I'm dying to kiss you, Jyn, but not if you don't want it."

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