depletes: (Default)
sǝʇǝןpǝp ([personal profile] depletes) wrote in [community profile] bakerstreet2017-03-03 09:09 pm

We don't have to take out clothes off to have a good time

NONSEXUAL romance


Romantic relationships, under most circumstances, have a sexual component to them. That's just another level of connection many desire with the one they love. Not so the case with you. You're with someone, and both of you very much acknowledge it's some sort of relationship, but you're not with-with them - not sexually. Whether you're just unexperienced and not ready to move to that level yet, believers in romantic friendship (or that situation is more convenient, given your time and place of residency), unable to consummate anything due to physiological differences or other issues, celibate, or simply content with the intimacy that you do have, it's a mutual decision...isn't it? But is this the way you two see yourselves continuing, without wanting more? And what about other people? If they know you're together, do they see your arrangement as "strange" or "less?"

Even if they do, though, it may not matter; you have each other.

  • Comment. You know the drill by now, folks!
  • Reply to everyone and everybody.


PROMPTS
  1. Hair care. Brushing, braiding, washing, cutting -- all of these involve a lot of careful touching in ways that many people enjoy. Hair braiding is a bonding experience in some cultures. In fact, grooming is a bonding technique for social primates in general. People without close ties to others often treat themselves to regular salon visits as a socially acceptable way to meet the need for touch and interaction.
  2. Shaving. This involves an unusually high level of trust, especially if the person is using a straight-edge razor or something else with an exposed blade rather than just a buzzer. Although it can apply to women, shaving is one of the few forms of physical intimacy that is most closely associated with men due to their facial hair. Initiaton into shaving is a major milestone for becoming a man, not just for boys during puberty but also for transsexuals during transition.
  3. Bathing. This varies by culture; in America most people bathe alone but some other cultures practice communal bathing. A bath is usually more intimate than a shower, although a public bath can be non-intimate and small shower stall can be intimate. It's also different when two people wash each other (an exchange of intimacy and affection) than when one person washes someone else (more of a caretaking or protective gesture).
  4. Feeding. A classic romantic motif involves lovers feeding each other, but it works as a way of providing and caring for someone in any context. Like bathing, it can also clue whether both parties are participating equally or one is taking care of the other (temporarily or regularly). This one has an existential flavor since survival depends on food supply.
  5. Seeing someone without their adaptive equipment on. This includes glasses, dentalware, prosthetic limbs, a wheelchair, etc. Adaptive equipment is part of one's presentation to the everyday world, and taking it off can be as intimate as removing clothing, for many people in many contexts.
  6. Holding Hands: There can be many reasons for this gesture. Physical closeness, offering comfort, or staying together in a crowd, all may have you reaching for someone.
  7. Undressing someone. This can be kind of a one-way experience if the recipient isn't awake, and is often awkward for both people if they are awake. Sometimes it happens because hands are out of commission, but a more common example is someone passing out drunk. Overheating is another good reason. Different circumstances can imply different levels of intimacy.
  8. Sharing secrets. This especially applies to talking about personal issues that aren't widely known. An exchange of secrets is a common ritual between "best friends" among girls and women, but appears elsewhere as well. Some things are only discussed among people with a common reference; veterans may be more comfortable discussing war memories with each other than civilians.
  9. Ordering for someone in a restaurant. Acquiring food, without asking the other person what to get, shows a knowledge of their needs and desires. Providing food is also a gesture of support and sustenance.
  10. Providing moral support at a major event. Helping someone get through a funeral, a trial, or other intense but not crisis situation is usually performed by a very dear friend. This is a situation where lovers or family members may be too close to the matter to be much use.
  11. Crying on someone. When you cry, you tend to let your guard down. Most of the people close to you will see you cry at some point, so that can be a milestone in a relationship. Actually crying on someone, letting them hold you, is even more intimate.
  12. Serving in a primary role for someone during a wedding. This includes the best man or maid of honor at a wedding, or stand-in for absent parents, etc. as well as the traditional family roles. One aspect of intimacy is sharing each other's lives, including ceremonies and transitions.
  13. Comforting someone after a bad breakup. Moments of great vulnerability can bring people closer. While this role sometimes falls to family, breakup repair more often goes to a woman's female friends or a man's male friends.
  14. Listening to someone's heartbeat or breathing. Close body contact, enough to carry soft personal sounds, tends to be comforting as well as connecting, as it touches on positive childhood memories for most people. It is shared between parent and child, sometimes between siblings, and later between lovers. Tight nonsexual partners may also do this.
  15. Putting someone to bed. Interestingly, this activity can happen among people who are just getting to know each other -- most often if someone passes out drunk, but exhaustion can have a similar effect. It's a gesture of caring to put someone to bed rather than leave them where they drop. A milder version involves draping a blanket or coat over a person asleep on a couch or the like.
  16. Sleeping in the same bed. This is an act of shared vulnerability and intimacy. Lovers customarily do this; so do some siblings or friends, especially as children. People may also be driven to share a bed, sleeping bag, etc. for warmth or lack of other accommodations in challenging circumstances.
  17. Watching someone sleep. There is more vulnerability on the part of the sleeper, and more intimacy from the watcher, when only one person is asleep. Parents often watch their children sleep. Lovers sometimes do this with each other, which can be cute or creepy. It's also a guard position, useful for showing that one character seeks to protect another.
  18. Waking someone up from a nightmare. A subtler form of rescue than more physical actions, this is still a gesture of protection and caring. It often leads to comfort afterwards. A typical courtesy between parent and child, or lovers, this can also be an early threshold for characters thrust together unexpectedly if one of them has sturdy daytime walls and a lot of issues. It is common, but often unspoken, among war buddies or veterans, many of whom have nightmares.
  19. Sharing clothes, jewelry, other personal items. This is common between siblings or close female friends. Sometimes roommates do it too. Wearing someone else's shirt or bathrobe is typical in romantic relationships, so can suggest a similar level of intimacy even in the absence of sex.
  20. Cleaning someone else's living space. This shows care and knowledge on the part of the cleaner, and trust on the part of the recipient. You have to know what NOT to throw away or move. It's typical of family members and roommates. Coworkers may clean each other's desk, office space, etc.
  21. Living together. This is a big step, even if it's just for a little while. Housemates are in each other's pockets; it's hard to keep secrets. Family members and lovers often live together, but housemates who are family-of-choice form a category of their own. If you don't want a romantic partner, a permanent housemate is a good choice for someone to share your life with.
  22. Childbirth. Attending the blessed event entails providing a lot of moral support for hours under high stress. It can create a bond with the baby as well as with the mother. When planned, this opportunity is only offered to the closest family members or friends, barring professionals. But it can happen by surprise in very awkward circumstances, a popular motif in fiction.
  23. Saving someone's life. Quick action in a life-threatening situation demonstrates how much one person values another. This can create a strong sense of connection, and sometimes obligation. It often, though not always, entails personal risk for the rescuer. This is fairly typical for military buddies or police partners, etc.
  24. Risking your life for someone. Placing someone else ahead of your own life shows their importance to you unequivocally. This often, though not always, involves trying to save or protect another person. While it can create a sense of gratitude, it frequently causes anger as well -- someone who loves you will generally object to you endangering yourself, even to protect them. Military and police buddies protect each other regularly.
  25. Making emergency decisions for someone. This reveals both how well you know the person, and how much you care about them -- whether you know what they would want, and act on it even if it differs from your personal preference. Unlike some of the other options, in this one the initial action is often outweighed by the aftermath. Both characters have to deal with the results of the decisions, good or bad.
  26. Deathwatch. Dying can be as intimate as giving birth. Staying with someone while they pass is an act of love; so is providing moral support to someone sitting deathwatch for a family member or other person. Many soldiers and police have done this for someone.
mantras: (Default)

Raven [ Teen Titans ] OTA

[personal profile] mantras 2017-03-04 03:16 am (UTC)(link)
( Available in canon superhero flavor, or AUs where she's some kind of urban fantasy-esque white witchy pagan, high fantasy mage, or a plain high school/college kid with freaky abilities. I'm particularly interested in a scenario where she's a darker Sabrina the Teenage Witch, dealing with some occult shit and trying to keep eldritch horrors at bay while dealing with stupid kid feelings. She also doesn't do intimacy well, like, at all. So this meme is tops.

character wishlist )
pineapplenerd: (Default)

Digimon / Koushirou Izumi

[personal profile] pineapplenerd 2017-03-04 03:21 am (UTC)(link)
[ I think he's more demi than ace, but he's definitely more interested in computers than his friends.

...demisexual, heteroromantic ]
pinkcrane: (Won't let this chance go by.)

kimberly hart (power rangers)

[personal profile] pinkcrane 2017-03-04 03:40 am (UTC)(link)
originallutece: WRONG O'CLOCK (Default)

Rosalind Lutece | Bioshock: Infinite

[personal profile] originallutece 2017-03-04 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
raptorcious: (if no one's awake)

i'm going rogue here and doing what i want. the meme police can come for me if they want.

[personal profile] raptorcious 2017-03-04 05:37 am (UTC)(link)
[Diego lets Rosalind work without interference from him. Primarily because she's an adult who is more than capable of determining what she will do by sufficiently integrating the lists of things she would like to do and things she needs to do. She doesn't need him to hover nearby, nor does he have any interest in wasting his day pulling her from work. He leaves plates of food and/or cups of something to drink within reach, returning to collect the dishes when enough time has passed for Rosalind to have likely emptied them. He only makes mild conversation when she hasn't spoken to another person in a while for a small indication of his departures and arrivals. She doesn't need more than that from Diego for the most part.]

[The other reason is that it's what she wants to do with her time. Far be it from Diego to tell her how she ought to spend her day, let alone that she should not spend it pursuing her intellectual passions. She's happiest in her lab, and so it suits Diego just fine to see her there for even a brief, passing moment.]

[ . . . ]

[That doesn't mean there comes a certain point where Diego starts to . . . eugh. He starts to miss her company. There comes a certain point where Diego misses her company, and he is starting to reach it. Diego lets her have the day, his interruptions so mild it's entirely possible they're completely forgotten within an hour or so, but night falls and he's back with more intent. He doesn't come between her and what she's doing, but rather than announce his presence with words, he stands beside her with a hand on her hip.]


I'm tired. Come to bed.

[What's that? How are those two things connected? Don't worry about it. He's not even tired. It's not like he's going to tell her she's tired even though at the rate she's been working, she absolutely should be. She's too stubborn to be willingly tired, anyway. Tired really doesn't matter whether it's applied to him or to her. It's the other part that does.]

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commandshumor: (Is a coat not a dress)

Todd the Wraith // Stargate Atlantis

[personal profile] commandshumor 2017-03-04 04:53 am (UTC)(link)
[ooc: Well why not? Open to most scenarios, though feel free to PM me to discuss]
luxoraculi: (pic#11073026)

Lunafreya Nox Fleuret | ffxv | ota

[personal profile] luxoraculi 2017-03-04 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
rebreathe: ({27})

Matsuura Kanan | Love Live Sunshine

[personal profile] rebreathe 2017-03-04 05:17 am (UTC)(link)
[not doing 22, 24, 25 and 26.]
morally_cryptic: (glow)

Anakin Skywalker | Star Wars | ota

[personal profile] morally_cryptic 2017-03-04 07:06 am (UTC)(link)
[can do around-ep-iii canon or around-ep-ii canon, some flavor of on-earth-modern, some flavor of force ghost, time travel, whatevs. I'll work with it, probably. Would prefer not to do 4, 12, or 22]
lux_tenebris: (Default)

Noctis Lucis Caelum || FFXV || ota

[personal profile] lux_tenebris 2017-03-04 07:20 am (UTC)(link)
demurring: (♡ 02)

Betty Cooper | Riverdale | OTA

[personal profile] demurring 2017-03-04 03:03 pm (UTC)(link)
thegoodbad: (angst ☠ shadowed)

Frank Castle | Daredevil [MCU]

[personal profile] thegoodbad 2017-03-04 03:51 pm (UTC)(link)
[no 12]
potentialed: pls dnt (Default)

2

[personal profile] potentialed 2017-03-04 09:47 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Their schedules, if they can be called that, don't allow for them to see each other every day. Even with Stephen's magic, he still has to keep watch over Earth (and New York especially). So the next time he sees Frank, it's been almost over two weeks since the last time.

He opens a portal in the other man's apartment like usual (finally getting Frank to admit it was more discrete to do it this way than walking into the building where anyone could see), and the first thing he says when he spots Frank: ]


My God, what is that on your face?

[ Says the guy with a goatee. ]

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20.

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constartist: (a mistake has been made)

joseph joestar | jojo's bizarre adventure | ota!

[personal profile] constartist 2017-03-04 05:59 pm (UTC)(link)
darkhorrse: (Default)

Otabek Altin | Yuri on Ice

[personal profile] darkhorrse 2017-03-04 07:15 pm (UTC)(link)
phichitchu: (oh!)

[personal profile] phichitchu 2017-03-04 08:39 pm (UTC)(link)
[This premise with these two would be adorable, don't you think? I'm fine with pretty much everything before 22.]

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not a problem!

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<3

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theonlycaptain: (Russia)

LEONARD SNART ( ❄ CAPTAIN COLD ) | DCTV | OTA

[personal profile] theonlycaptain 2017-03-04 07:28 pm (UTC)(link)
( ooc ;; this is his specialty )
onlyeverdoubted: (Default)

Bodhi Rook | Rogue One: A Star Wars Story | OTA

[personal profile] onlyeverdoubted 2017-03-04 08:59 pm (UTC)(link)
forgottomakeglasses: (surprised)

Yuki Nagato | The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

[personal profile] forgottomakeglasses 2017-03-05 12:22 am (UTC)(link)
[ Seduce her with literature. ]
talentedscavenger: (Default)

Rey || Star Wars: The Force Awakens || F/M

[personal profile] talentedscavenger 2017-03-05 06:36 am (UTC)(link)
[ooc: Not up for 22 or 26.]
scarlettwin: (Default)

Wanda Maximoff || MCU || F/M

[personal profile] scarlettwin 2017-03-05 06:36 am (UTC)(link)
[ooc: Not up for 12, 22, or 26]
nodogsallowed: (bfs)

Mikleo | Tales of Zestiria

[personal profile] nodogsallowed 2017-03-05 07:10 am (UTC)(link)
dannyrand: (pic#10500067)

Daniel Rand | Marvel (616 or MCU) | ota

[personal profile] dannyrand 2017-03-05 03:11 pm (UTC)(link)
polynomials: (Default)

Akane Kurashiki | Zero Escape

[personal profile] polynomials 2017-03-06 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
[Surprise me.]
chicartista: (Default)

zed martin | constantine

[personal profile] chicartista 2017-03-06 08:13 am (UTC)(link)
[ she's a tactile psychic who gets visions from people via touch so this is very likely. ]
made_of_stars: (Default)

jyn erso || rogue one || ota

[personal profile] made_of_stars 2017-03-06 06:31 pm (UTC)(link)
theycalledmeacurse: (sincere new)

Rogue | X-Men Films (DoFP Era) | OTA

[personal profile] theycalledmeacurse 2017-03-07 08:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[Open to cross-canon and multiverse shenanigans.]